Have you ever had an awesome/funny fortune in your fortune cookie?

You’d have to know the difference between my husband and me to really understand the irony of our respective fortune cookies. He’s just a “take it as it comes!” “No worries!” kind of guy, while I worry about the bills and the kids and the money. It causes tension between us, of course. But I swear, everyone of his fortune cookies is some variation of, “A lot of fun will be coming your way soon!” or “You will meet exciting people soon!” and mine were some variation of “All of your hard work will pay off soon!” or “Work extra hard this week and you will see results soon!” Bleh!

Ya’ll do know about adding the words ”....in bed,” at the end of your cookie fortunes, don’t you? Just checkin’!

On my 18th birthday, my family and I went to a Chinese place for my birthday. I kid you not, my fortune said, “Inspected by #14.”

I just had a fortune cookie that said I would be ‘dancing to a different beat next summer’. Now if I add ‘in bed’ to that, I’m a happy camper!

I never have but Filbert, from Rocko’s Modern Life, cracked one open to reveal my personal favorite.

“Bad luck and misfortune will infest your pathetic soul for all eternity.”

i’m on da mega spin

We do the add “in bed” thing at our house, too. That makes almost every fortune funny. They just aren’t the same without “in bed” anymore. :)

My husband and I add in bed to the end of ours, here is what happened one night Fortune Cookie Pciture

His fortune was the top one and mine was the bottom, we laughed so much that night.

@CFi THAT is hilarious!!!!!

“You will attend a party where strange customs prevail.”

“Psychiatric help would be of benefit to you.”

“Hello.”

My recent ex girlfriend’s mother got a fortune that read “Smile if you like this fortune cookie.”

@noelleptc Snorting Natty Lite!!!! Time for bed! That was hilarious again! Thanks! This is why I Fluther!
Thanks!
~Val

You have no idea how amazing your timing is on this question.

THIS was in my fortune cookie yesterday.

I saved it, trying to figure out a way to incorporate it into one of my posts. Luckily you came along & asked this question. Fate…? I think so. :)

When life gives you oranges make orange juice because that is what is inside oranges…..

uhhhh whaaaaa

I am just sitting here trying to figure out why “What kind of owl is this?” is a sibling question to fortune cookies . . . .

“You like Chinese food :)”

My husband and I also add in bed to ours, and he keeps threatening to start a website about fourtune cookie messages.

@rpmpseudonym You should change your name to guo dong!

I’ve gotten some awesome fortune cookies over the years. Here are the ones I’ve saved:

You have inexhaustible wisdom and power. Hell yeah! Haha.
You home is a pleasant place from which you draw happiness. Aside from the typo, true.
God will give you everything that you want. Interesting, as I am an atheist. ALSO: IN BED.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don’t have film. This is SO ME.

The other day, my 15 year old daughter and a 14 year old (girl) friend of hers got the same exact fortune:
You will be very happy with your wife. Maybe they’ll marry each other?