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jonsblond's avatar

Why do some people feel the need to piss all over a question when they aren't actually answering the question (examples in details)?

Asked by jonsblond (37898 points ) February 15th, 2011

Sorry if my question isn’t clear, I’m a bit tired. Here are some examples of what I mean.

Question: “What’s your favorite country music song?”
Answer: “You’d never get me to listen to country music. Country music is for rednecks.”

Question: “What is your favorite sport?”
Answer: “I hate sports. I’d rather read.”

Why do people do this? Do they need to make their point that badly and put others down for what they enjoy, especially if they aren’t actually answering the question?

Believe me, I’ve wanted to do this before when I didn’t like some generalizations being thrown around on a question, but I knew I wouldn’t be answering the question. I would have derailed the thread, so I left it alone.

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

103 Answers

JilltheTooth's avatar

I never got that, either. That’s why most of my Qs are in General, and why I can’t ask some light-hearted ones that I would like to because they’d be moved to Social. I guess some people never master the art of simply not clicking…

kenmc's avatar

Superiority complex.

6rant6's avatar

Speaking of that is, “Scootching [sp?] the Jelly” in the urban dictionary yet?

ucme's avatar

I like to call it lack of self restraint. Negative bastards being another feasible interpretation…..just a theory :¬)

deni's avatar

Jagoffs.

Jude's avatar

I am guilty of that. Did it once with a Superbowl question. Should have restrained myself.

I should say, with most organized sports, that I root for the team with the prettiest jersey’s.

I should keep my trap shut. :)

I was secretly rooting for the Packers, though.

nebule's avatar

no respect

YARNLADY's avatar

Is it really so bad? I use it as a way to let people know there is more than one side to a concept.

Jude's avatar

I can see how it is disrespectful to the OP.

Won’t happen again.

JilltheTooth's avatar

@YARNLADY : I think it’s disrespectful when someone asks a specific question, like in the examples given, to just come aboard to insult someone’s taste. When it’s not “do you like country music?” but “what’s your favorite country song?” it’s pointless. IMO.

ilana's avatar

Now I have to go back through all my answers and see if I’ve done this, so I don’t sound too hypocritical :P but, I guess they just like giving their opinions no matter how the OP would feel about having their question virtually rejected.

downtide's avatar

I’ve probably done this… ~hangs head in shame~

everephebe's avatar

I think that some people believe that when someone asks a question, it entitles them to give their opinion. An opinion is fine, so long as it actually answers the question.

Of course the word answer has more than one meaning. An answer is a reply, and usually a correct reply or solution or at least one that corresponds with the question.

Some people think they need to express their opinions, even when it’s bad form. Some don’t realize how derailing their honesty is. I don’t think that they think about if they are successfully answering the question or being helpful. It’s a response, not an answer they give.

It is thoughtlessness, and I know, I have been guilty of that at one point or another. Good question.

chyna's avatar

I agree with @JilltheTooth. I do think it is disrepectful. If you aren’t answering the specific question, then don’t answer it.
I might have done this myself. I’ll be more careful.

JilltheTooth's avatar

hey, guys, you just know someone’s gonna link all the times we’ve done it ourselves, don’t you…

ilana's avatar

Darn it, I think I’ve spotted one…

cak's avatar

I’m fairly certain I’ve done this in the past. I will try to refrain from doing so in the future. It is disrespectful. I think I’ve just been careless in the past and hope to not make the same mistake in the future.

I do like country music, and almost any sport rocks!

everephebe's avatar

@6rant6 What? What is this “Scootching [sp?] the Jelly”?

mrrich724's avatar

People who are so self important that they feel the need to add the answer without pausing to think that no one gives a shit about their opinion if it isn’t going to add to the discussion.

And then unfortunately, their usual retort is “if you don’t like it get off the Q&A site,” which I think is total B.S.

I’m sure I’ve done it. I think it can just happen b/c it’s a stream of conciousness thing, where you think it, then you type it out. But there are definitely a few people who do it consistently, and then I wonder “is this why ___ spends that much time on Fluther? B/C they do this in real life so now no one wants to talk to them?”

YARNLADY's avatar

Let’s say we’re all sitting around the living room, and some one says “Hey, what’s your favorite county music song?”. So now I say, “I don’t listen to country music.” Does that mean all the rest of you are going to throw me out the door?

6rant6's avatar

@YARNLADY I was thinking you must have forced your way in to start with.

6rant6's avatar

@YARNLADY Oh wait. Here.

~

everephebe's avatar

Also: I don’t like country music yet.
I’ve been wondering how to go about finding older country music online that I might like any recommendations? I’m wondering how far back I’ll have to go to find something I like 40’s, 50’s, earlier… I don’t know. I think that most people give up on something that they don’t like based on it’s most current form, which is a shame. I don’t think anyone who hasn’t heard all country music can say that don’t like it. So that’s my thoughts.

Sports aren’t better than books, but they are still enjoyable.
Picking a favorite sport would be hard. I like hockey when it’s not so violent, european football, that mesoamerican ballgame looks interesting and well many others fun to watch.

Thanks for the link @6rant6

deni's avatar

@YARNLADY In a face to face conversation that’s fine, but on here, you have to go out of your way to answer the question only to give an unhelpful response, so I think it’s different.

mrrich724's avatar

@YARNLADY I think it’s a little different. If you are in a room with someone, and there is a conversation going on, you might be looked on as antisocial (or a number of other things) by not adding to the conversation, in which case, it might be appropriate to share your feeling to add input or to change the subject to something everyone can discuss.

On here however, you can look at the question, and if you don’t have a constructive addition, just move on to the next question, and no one will ever know you were there.

YARNLADY's avatar

But, but, but isn’t that what social is all about? No one complains when someone answers a question about bad roommates by saying “shoot them”.

JilltheTooth's avatar

But, @YARNLADY , that’s exactly the point. We’re not sitting around in someone’s living room as a cohesive group, we’re sitting in a large ballroom in many groups, with many conversations going on, probably a number that would be more suited to you than that one. If you weren’t already in on the conversation about country music, why join at all?
Yeah, what @mrrich724 said.

iamthemob's avatar

I like @JilltheTooth‘s analogy – it would very much be like overhearing someone ask that in the conversation next to you (or at the table next to you in the restaurant) and leaning over unsolicited and interjecting “I don’t like _______” and then returning to your conversation.

When someone asks something along those lines, you can be fairly certain they know that there are some people who don’t like country music.

J0E's avatar

When you read a question, no matter if you have an appropriate answer, you automatically create some answer. Some people choose to submit that thought.

cockswain's avatar

Because opinions are like assholes.

Blueroses's avatar

I see @JilltheTooth and @YARNLADY have a point. There are times you might join a conversation “I don’t even like country music” to have someone say “You should listen to this song. It’s all about you.” Mind changed, connections made.

It all is in the attitude, isn’t it? How you present your opinion. Are you open to a new idea or are you diametrically opposed and taking every opportunity to get that in?

iamthemob's avatar

@cockswain – True, but that doesn’t mean that you need to flash your asshole to everyone.

he he, it’s just “butting” in.

tranquilsea's avatar

I agree with @YARNLADY in that we, as social people, may have harder time shutting off our opinions because we may be defaulting to how we would respond to these questions face to face. Up until very recently any queries sent to us where intended to be answered by us.

I’ve been guilty of this at least one time that I can remember. The next time a similar question came up I managed to kick my brain into high gear and not post.

jonsblond's avatar

@ilana and @JilltheTooth I’m sure I’ve done it before myself. I blame the beer.~

Dutchess_III's avatar

Well, I think there is a difference between “pissing all over a question,” and just interjecting a neutral, if uncalled-for opinion. In the first example you gave about country music, the response was to insult those who DO listen to country music by calling them rednecks. As for the second…well, that was more of an obscure response about a persons personal opinion and easily over looked, IMO. Now, if that person had said, “I don’t watch sports. Only mindless idiots watch sports. I’d rather read a book,” and then continues jumping into the discussion with insults and stuff, that would be “pissing” on the question.

Oh, and I don’t like chipped beef in cheese sauce because it’s gross. Really. I know you guys were seriously wondering about that.

WasCy's avatar

I love all of the discussion that this has engendered if I may interject a somewhat off-topic remark.

I’m sure glad I’m not one of those assholes, is all I can say.

filmfann's avatar

Why doesn’t this question address some of the problems of the homeless?

or maybe it’s the barbiturates

6rant6's avatar

It really ticks me off when homeless people answer a question with something like, “You wouldn’t be asking for what everyone’s favorite kind of steak is if you had to eat beans every night like I do!” because you just know they’re never going to come back to read your brilliant response.

WasCy's avatar

Everybody knows it’s all the fault of the stupid Republicans, anyway.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@YARNLADY You said, “Let’s say we’re all sitting around the living room, and some one says “Hey, what’s your favorite county music song?”. So now I say, “I don’t listen to country music.” Does that mean all the rest of you are going to throw me out the door?” No. It simply means you won’t be participating in the discussion that follows between people who DO like country music….right?

DominicX's avatar

I’m sure I’ve done this, but I try not to, because it really annoys me when I see things like:

Q: What’s the best PC laptop brand? A: Get a Mac
Q: What’s the best college in California? A: Go to college in Massachusetts.
Q: What’s the best Latin textbook? A: Study French instead.

That kind of thing just doesn’t help. I don’t think the askers of advice questions like that should have to explain why they’re asking for advice within a certain category. They have their reasons; people should stick to helping the askers get their answers…

cockswain's avatar

@iamthemob I always thought that quote subtly implied giving an unwanted opinion is asshole-ish.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Guys…I don’t think someone interjecting “I don’t like country music,” is that bad. It’s pointless, but just ignore them and go on. What is bad, though, is if they proceed to insult those who do like country music, and keep popping into the conversation with their opposing opinion.

6rant6's avatar

How about, “I hate country music, but if I didn’t detest it so much I can’t actually listen to anything described as country, I might like Cheryl Crow’s country stuff.”

Actually that’s my position.

tinyfaery's avatar

I don’t know why others do it, but I can tell you why I do it, as rare as an occurrence as it is. There are times when the premise, the examples or the quips themselves are so offensive, inane or riddled with inaccuracies that I just have to say something. If anyone thinks it’s disrespectful, just remember that if I am doing it it’s only because I felt like the question was disrespectful, in some way, in the first place.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Well, then you are forgiven for all, @psychocandy! And I have to say, that in an instance like that I might do the same….

jonsblond's avatar

Those are good examples @DominicX. Thank you.

geeky_mama's avatar

In my case, sometimes in my haste to answer I’ve gone too fast and missed the true point of the question and provided what I thought was a helpful answer, but on re-reading turns out to not be the most helpful response.
That said, I also agree with @YARNLADY that sometimes an alternate point of view can be helpful to the discussion.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@geeky_mama Giving pause for thought depends on the situation. If you’re at a gathering, and the discussion turns to country music, and someone says to a group, “Who is your favorite country singer?” and one person pops up with “I don’t like country music!” what is there to think about? It’s not like it’s profound.

geeky_mama's avatar

@Dutchess_III – agreed, so for “Social” questions I won’t beat myself up too badly, but I think I’m guilty of not taking a long enough pause to re-read the occasional “General” question too.

WasCy's avatar

My dorg likes country music. I’m not trying to make a point; I’m just sayin’ is all.

cockswain's avatar

How can you tell?

Dutchess_III's avatar

@geeky_mama Well, if you post something contrary in “General,” most likely the mods will vaporize it as being “off topic” or “unhelpful” or some helpful thing like that!

@WasCy does your dorg like chipped beef in cheese sauce???That’s the mainest thing!!!

Dutchess_III's avatar

Darn your eyes @cockswain! I didn’t see you posting!

seazen's avatar

Hello, Jude.

I, too, am guilty of it.

Step 2.

augustlan's avatar

If the premise of the question is faulty (or obnoxious), I think it’s fine to address that in a respectful way. Otherwise, we should stay out of it if we aren’t going to answer the question. Certain I’m guilty of this, too.

cockswain's avatar

When is it OK to be a raging prick?

Dutchess_III's avatar

Not yet….

wundayatta's avatar

I think people just want to join in, and that is the only way they can join in, because they don’t think the assumptions of the question are valid. Sometimes it’s because they think they can better help the OP if they go outside the assumptions of the question. When someone says, “get a Mac,” (in answer to “what PC should I get?”) they may feel they are really helping because the Mac really would be better for the OP’s needs, in their opinion.

Sometimes it’s a joke. Sometimes it’s boredom. Sometimes it’s making fun of the OP for writing such an incomprehensible or inane question (guilty as charged, officer). OMG, there are probably as many reasons as there are jellies.

And it’s scooching the jelly. No “t.” It means “pissing” on the question.

6rant6's avatar

@wundayatta Good. That’s the way I submitted it to Urbandictionary.com.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I LIKE “scooching the jelly”! It’s unique! It’s like putting the Jelly in the frizzer! It has special meaning. I vote for “scooching the jelly.” .... All for say “Aye.” All against, “Don’t post.”

PS. Pissing on a question is very unsanitary. Just sayin’

iamthemob's avatar

@Dutchess_III – to be honest – I think it’s “that bad” because this is really supposed to be a community.

As such, we expect to get useful answers to a question. If we disagree with it, we can do that.

But to see a question that you have nothing of relevance to add to it, and interject that pointless information – well, you should probably be posting on another site, in my opinion.

breedmitch's avatar

everyone knows MAC is better.

everephebe's avatar

@wundayatta and @breedmitch, Mac’s OS is pretty great, their computers are really the best, but there are other computers in the universe that are decent… not that I’d be caught dead using a non-mac. But…. I’m a third generation Mac user, in an Apple-loving family.

I think that there are polite ways of being not-as-helpful-as-the-OP-was-going-for, implementing them is key.

DominicX's avatar

@wundayatta

Well to be honest, the reason it bothers me when people say things like “get a Mac” is because it assumes that the OP doesn’t know what they’re talking about or know what they want (and yes, I am referring to myself, but not only myself). I remember one question about laptops where I included in the thread that price was not an issue and many answers told me to save money and recommended “budget” laptops as if I didn’t know what I was doing, even though I was very aware of what I was doing and what I was asking. It just made it seem like people don’t care about the question and what the OP is looking for and care more about asserting their own opinion on others.

harple's avatar

@cockswain I believe the full remark is “Opinions are like assholes: everybody’s got one!”

Hear hear to the premise of this question!

wundayatta's avatar

@DominicX I understand your point, but I’ve always seen the audience for a question as being more than the OP. I don’t believe we “own” our questions once we’ve written them. Sure, it can be really annoying when people don’t answer the question the way you want them to, but I have found that I can redirect people, most of the time, simply by telling them, more clearly, what I want.

Now, I am a minority here. The official fluther view is that the question belongs to the OP. If an answer is “unhelpful,” at least in General, it should be moderated, which in the case of fluther, seems to mean excised.

Anyway, that’s where I’m coming from. It’s just an opinion. I understand the annoyance of being a question asker and having people derail the thing from the start. However, I have often found that if I ignore that crap, others will come along who will answer the question. And clearly, I like to scooch the jelly sometimes. Mea Culpa.

auntydeb's avatar

is what my cat does with its bottom ‘scooching’ too?

mammal's avatar

Never let a bad question get in the way of a good answer.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@iamthemob Yes, we’re a community, but we’re no different than any other community….except that here, I think, we all have relatively similar education and intelligence levels. We can be picky in that regard. However, we’re no different from any other community in emotional regards. That means that if someone throws in an opinion that is contrary to what the OP is asking (which, in the examples above could not be construed as a “new” or “different” concept by any means), the reaction will be to ignore them or get defensive and rise to the bait…..one of the two emotional responses will happen, and in that regard we are no different than any other real life community….I vote for “ignore.”

iamthemob's avatar

@Dutchess_III – Again, I’m not really talking about something running contrary to what the OP is asking – it’s the situations in the thread’s summary.

Answering in a manner that kind of negates the question, or doesn’t add anything except that this individual thinks an entire concept doesn’t merit discussion, it more like trolling than it is answering.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Oh, I agree with that @iamthemob. And, actually, as I look back, I was partially responding to you, and then swerved off to respond to @wundayatta, only I forgot to tell anyone! Or I mixed the two together….The “community” section was in response to you (we’re the same as a community IRL for the most part,) and to @wundayatta I meant to say that a conversation doesn’t have to be “derailed,” just because some party pooper poops in….they can be ignored.

jonsblond's avatar

I’m so happy no one decided to shit all over this thread. Now that would really piss me off. Thanks for keeping it civil everyone! I also appreciate the humor. :D

cockswain's avatar

not sure why but I’m still chuckling several days later about @iamthemob ‘s asshole-flashing comment. Like there are flashers, then there are the more heinous asshole flashers

iamthemob's avatar

@cockswain – that’s exactly what I was trying to convey. I changed it from “mooning” because I just fell in love with the idea of the “more heinous asshole flashers.”

chyna's avatar

^^You kids….

Dutchess_III's avatar

@jonsblond Heybutt..I still hate chipped beef in cheese sauce.

cockswain's avatar

it just takes a much more insidious individual to intentionally flash the asshole itself

cockswain's avatar

@Dutchess_III You know what, that sounds delicious. I lived in the midwest for a long time, and I’d have been perfectly happy to be served that. Particularly if it also had potatoes in it.

Dutchess_III's avatar

O.M.G. My dad called it SOS. He was served it in the Navy, and loved it and so he told Mom how to fix it after they got married. And THEN, one day, when was about 14, he told us what SOS meant. And I didn’t like it even before that, but after that I just wanted to frow up every time Mom served it!! You can have mine. Scrapes plate off on the floor.

cockswain's avatar

It took me a moment to recall what SOS is. As a public service to the other users, I will define it: Shit on a Shingle

jonsblond's avatar

@Dutchess_III My mom always made it with gravy instead of cheese sauce, served over toast. She always said she knew 100 ways to serve ground beef. She had to feed six children on a low budget. I hated it then, but understand now how difficult it can be to please everyone at dinner time. I swear she put a curse on me. “What until you have children of your own”. I have two very picky eaters now.

JilltheTooth's avatar

Man, we are soooo predictable! This one took a little longer to get to food, but here we are! I think we should change the name of the Meta section to the Food Section.

cockswain's avatar

I’d love to. My mom is Lithuanian and made an excellent potato, onion, and bacon dish called kugelis.

cak's avatar

I have no idea what chipped beef in cheese sauce is. I’m curious. However, it sounds like something I should avoid.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@cak OMG!! Next time you’re at the grocery store…look for chipped beef. It comes in a glass bottle, smaller at the top than it is at the bottom, like a short Coke bottle, and the “beef” is crammed into it, like, folded around the curve of the bottle…and then, IDK, melt cheese, make some sort of cheese dip, and frow the chipped beef in and serve over….toast, I think. SOOOOO gross!

@cockswain Round these parts we call that “Whoopie Surprise.” Usually works. Programming “potato, onion and bacon dish” in my head for future use!

@jonsblond In elementary school they served a hamburger and gravy concoction over toast…they may even have called it SOS years before my dad kindly told me what SOS meant…..It was some goooooooood stuff, Maynard. Nothing like Chipped Beef in Cheese Sauce. Bletch.

How did we end up on this subject, anyway?....Oh, [checking question] “Pissing” on things. Goes along with “Pooping.” Which goes along with Chipped Beef SOS. It’s all clear to me now.

auntydeb's avatar

Ooer missus…

my cat is definitely a heinous asshole flasher

Chipped beef, sorry, but crammed into a Coke shaped bottle? I take it this is only available in the US? Who on earth thought of that? Eugh.

Why would you want it in cheese…?

Oh, I wanted so much to use my ‘education and intelligence’, as mentioned by @Dutchess_III , but instead am reduced to pointless fantasy, trying to imagine how they get ‘chipped’ (minced? chopped?) beef – which bits of a beef do they use? – into something coke-bottle shaped…...

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarghhh

screaming whisper

What’s the thread about? Food? No! It’s about pissing.

omigodomigodomigodwhyamihere

Deep Breath

Sigh.

OK, I absolutely agree, it is disconcerting when a jelly gets a-hold of one’s well thought out or perfectly honest question, then writes a damning one-liner for the heck of it. It irks me even more, when they proceed to get several GAs for it, while the question itself gets barely a single GQ.

I invented yet another new porridge variation yesterday, it was totally lush

cak's avatar

@Dutchess_III eeeewwww!!! I think I’ll pass!

JilltheTooth's avatar

Hey! Back to food! No more excretia! Food! Food! Food!

cak's avatar

I just ate a piece of cheesecake!

JilltheTooth's avatar

Yay! Cheescake! Theirs a great bread thread that’s got me dusting off my old bread machine…

auntydeb's avatar

Lurve cheesecake. I baked for Britain today: lush fruit-round thingummy, green-pea savoury, er…thingummy and lush baked dumpling… thingummy. All very yummy thingummies actually

Why is there so much whispering about food? Everyone gets excited, it all seems jolly tasty, we should SHOUT appreciation of good nosh. Hurrah for lovely grub!!!*

but now whispering for fear that next Q is patronising… Do American Jellies know ‘nosh’ and ‘grub’? shhhh

JilltheTooth's avatar

Yes, @auntydeb , we sure do! One of my favorite takes on ‘saying grace” when I was little was my friend’s dad who used to declare “Rub a dub dub, thanks for the Grub!”

auntydeb's avatar

Soo glad! love food, love words that relate to food!

Dutchess_III's avatar

Yes! Yes! Someone said “Jelly,” and that’s what the chipped beef is in! A Jelly-Jar like jar thing!

Now, @jonsblond, do you feel better? Maybe you should take this to part 2. Pissin’ In The Thread Part 2!

Don’t any of you EVER piss in one of @jonsblond‘s thread or…..I’ll have you over for dinner and make you eat it….

Symbeline's avatar

Maybe something in the question strikes them, and they feel the need to address this. Fluther is good for being expendable like that, although I do agree sometimes it gets annoying. For example, last night I made a thread, in general, asking for places to find ghost sighting videos. Most of the people who answered started debating about the existing of ghosts. I got very few people who actually provided me with what I asked for.
Funny thing is, if I made a question such as Do you believe in ghosts? I bet the majority of the answers I’d get would be people telling me that we’ve all been through this many times already hahaha.
Not that I really care how my question was answeredd, and I certainly encourage expanded discussion, unless it’s blatant insulting and flaming…but primarily I was looking for links.
So I’m not sure what makes people do that, or why. I know I’ve done it too. It’s not uncommon, Maybe there’s some psychological aspect at play here, although this may be hard to imagine, but the internet and psychology sure have a lot to teach us, I’ll bet.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@Symbeline my house has a ghost. And chipped beef. And you’re invited.

Symbeline's avatar

I’m there, dude.

JilltheTooth's avatar

Good food going on over on the “I hate Fluther” thread, you guys…

YARNLADY's avatar

@JilltheTooth ha, ha, good answer

SeaTurtle's avatar

@kenmc , Outstanding answer .(on so many levels, that it even regards the OP)

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