Zombie Apocalypse: Free reign over a big box hardware store. What do you do?

I would fashion clubs and stabbing devices out of the wood supply and trade them for clean food and hot showers.

Pile up compost and dirt bags in the entry vestibules. String up barbwire and other fortifications along the perimeter of the roof. Rig up spotlights and floodlights, if possible. Divide up the aisles into sectors that could be cordoned off in an emergency. Build melee weapons. Secure a sanitary latrine somewhere.

lol, In a week I could turn a “big box hardware store” into a fortress…

@coffeenut Well c’mon, lets hear how. I’m bored at work and planning world domination don’t get off shift for another hour.

First thing I’d do is hit the paint department, and sew together layers of fiberglass fabric (meant to repair boat hulls), mats, and fiberglass resin to create some light, bite proof/resistant armor (enough of that can probably stop some bullets, too). Then maybe experiment with the flammables to see what recipe most resembles napalm, which I would then load into the deck sprayers that I’ve put pressure-washer nozzles on. Maybe affix a blow torch to the front with some hose clamps. Just for starters.

I used to work at a Home Depot, so I’d sometimes try to figure out what I could use when the zombies came. No, I didn’t mean the customers!

@incendiary_dan if you and I were on a zombie team together, I’d give the zombies a good 3 weeks before their reign of terror was completely wiped out.

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard I’m a bit out of shape, might take 4 weeks.

I think I might try to make some fiberglass armor in the next month, now that I’m thinking about it.

lol, ok…

The store near me doesn’t have many windows so they would be sealed as well as the doors…4×4’s, Plywood, plexiglass (new windows)....warehouse has 3 doors (heavy steel role up kind)....one would be altered into a draw bride kind door (wood, steel, re-bar, chains)

Than everything would be inventoried and useless material would be discarded in front of the building (window/door area)

Food/supplies retrieval units would be assembled (It’s late so description of these will be tomorrow)

Mass termination tools will be assembled on the roof and deployed in case of infection assemblies…. (Re-bar, Blades, concrete blocks, rope) held by a extending frame…

Ect…

@coffeenut I’ll be looking forward to the continuation tomorrow, when I’ll be extra bored working a double.

I’d make sure that all my esstential suppplies were upstairs in the management offices, just in case someone tries to take my stuff.
I would block off the doors to gardening and any other open areas with metal sheeting, barbed wire, nails, and broken light bulbs.
Make sure that I’d have a generators all gassed up so that the power tools/weapons are ready to go.
Stock up on lighter fluid, charcoal, and matches.
Make an outpost on the roof at each corner using waterproof stained wood, rope, and tarp. I’m assuming that the power wouldn’t be on much of the time so I’d get some of the wood out of the lumbar yard during the day when I could.
Put a ton of plastic trash cans on the roof to collect rain water.
Paint that there are people inside on the roof.
Use one of those cherry pickers Home Depot has to make a few windows up high.

In the zombie apocalypse, I assume I’ll be running around and surviving with @incendiary_dan. While he guards the entrances, I head to the DVD bargain bin. Every store on the planet has one now. I find both Home Alone and Home Alone 2 in the bargain bin, then head to the employee break room, where there is a DVD player. After watching both Home Alone Movies (and yelling to Dan that I’m watching rubbish and eating junk) and carefully studying the traps of the masterful Kevin McAllister, I construct all the traps, particularly the ones from Home Alone 2, which are especially sadistic.

When the zombies come, I taunt them as they are halted and humiliated by each successive trap. Dan picks off any stragglers with his AK. Then we spend many happy weeks in the domestic bliss of the kitchen and bath model section, watching all the glorious movies that the bargain bin has to offer.

Uhm, a chainsaw.

Everyone knows that the only way to defeat zombies is by cutting off their fingers, toes and their teeth. That way they can’t infect you. Duh.

Then we spend many happy weeks in the domestic bliss of the kitchen and bath model section, watching all the glorious movies that the bargain bin has to offer.

@hobbitsubculture, that’s sort of adorable.

I’d do precisely…...squat! At least nothing that would encourage violence & bad blood. I mean all they want is a little compassion & tenderness right? I said right!?!..........I didn’t get a harumph outta that guy!! With this in mind, i’d offer a strong support system, counselling, rehab, chocolate, that kinda vibe. I’d be sure to welcome them with some appropriate yet inoffensive music. Maybe Thriller or the soundtrack from Fame would help them feel at home. Last but by no means least, & this is just one guy talking here, i’d afford them the overdue oppurtunity to…....well I only have one word for this so i’m going to come right out & say it. Moisturise!!! Several skin conditions may be a contributary factor in the lack of social skills inherent in your average undead individual. Zombies, welcome one & welcome all.

@hobbitsubculture I’m in as long as there’s a clever apron for me in that deal.

After increasing my armaments as mentioned above, I’d quickly cobble together small living areas for the people in my group, basically making the equivalent to one room huts for each “family” unit that wants one. There are enough cast iron stoves for them to be warm regardless of the season, particularly if they’re insulated with a combination of pink fiberglass and the recycled insulation they’ve been pushing lately. Sometime soon after we’d need to make some extra ventilation, so the whole store doesn’t get too smoky.

The next thing I’d do would be to take all of the topsoil and a good portion of the fertilizer in the garden section up to the roof. This would likely spend the remaining energy in the forklifts, though many are powered by propane which these stores keep a supply of. I would probably conserve as much of that for grilling as possible. A portion of the roof would be covered in the soil and fertilizer, rimmed with paver stones, and turned into a garden. It would probably include a greenhouse, since I think I’ve seen greenhouse kits in the garden section. Any plants that had survived without being watered would be the first things put in the dirt, and if we didn’t have any other seeds (like the seedbank I mentioned bringing with me in the most recent zombie apocalypse question), then we could also plant the seeds from the store. Otherwise, I don’t trust them as much, since I know where Home Depot and Lowes get their seeds. Using dowels, small planks, and picture hanging wire, the garden would be protected by a perimeter of Ojibwe bird snares, which also means fresh pigeon meat for us survivors. Maybe some weighted twitch-up snares for adventurous squirrels, too.

Because artificial fertilizer only stores for so long, I convert it into a predecessor of C-4 using the denatured alcohol from the paint department. Save that for later, in case we find the other ingredients for explosives. That leaves us needing a source of fertilizer in the future. Luckily, solving that problem can solve another: the toilets in the public restrooms will stop working eventually. There are usually at least 200 5 gallon buckets in any of these types of stores, which are perfect to use in a composting toilet system. Piss and shit in the bucket, throw some mulch, leaves, ashes from fires, etc. on top, and when you fill it up you cap it and leave it for a year or two. Some buckets can also be set up with tarps to catch water and be used in water filtration systems, particularly if any of the charcoal meant for grills is untreated. When the coast is clear, we could also use the buckets to fetch water from nearby.

That should take care of, or at least greatly supplement, the first three basic survival needs: shelter, water, & food, as well as sanitation to some degree.

Food/Supplies Retrieval Unit.(FSRU) passive zombie suppression vehicle
This is from my notes, My friend has the actual info/computer model…some of this could be outdated…
Measures 20 feet long, 10 feet wide, 9Feet tall…. Has a design based on this crystal design

Main body, front/back “Clamp Doors” , 2 Emergency exits, 2 windshields, 8 tires(4 each side) Wide track style….4 reg tires, 4 steer/Power tires (2 forward, 2 reverse) , Can drive in two directions, 12 circular Saw blades (large teeth), 8ft of hand saw blades, 12 5ft roller sets, 4 2stroke motors, 4 electric motors, 2 bicycle fork assembles. Ply-wood, 4×4’s, 2×4’s, Re-bar, Sheet Metal, Grease tubes,

Frame is constructed of 4×4’s reinforced with re-bar, inside walls and floor and roof made of 1inch plywood, Doors are made with A-frame design,Plywood reinforced with 2×4’s secured in 3 spots with chain/hooks,2 Windows in front door, 2 in back. Window holes are covered with Plexiglases (on the outside) with a extra 6in bigger than hole, secured by 2×4’s and curved Re-bar. 3 rows of 5 storage bins line each inside wall.

Outside Both sides..Layer med Plywood, Layer thin re-bar, Layer 2×4, Layer Sheet Metal. Front/Back doors..Layer Plywood, 3×5ft roller assembles(each door) . Wheel covers come off side half way up wall (5ft), (seamless contour lines front to back) sticks out 2ft than straight down. On “shelf” 6 circular saw blades spread evenly attached to “free spin” system wile moving and “electric slow spin” wile stopped. Between circular blades, Hand saw blades are fixed positioned in a “running board” style. Along the down side of wheel cover chainsaw slots are available (in an emergency). Than sheet metal will be heavily greased.

Warning I really suck at drawing (with computer’s help or not)

So..Basically when moving——> any Zombie shambling in the way is bumped by the “cow catcher” front, slides along the rollers and flipped off by the first spinning blade…..

Now if you are being swarmed this is what it’s designed for….As the Zombies start pressing in they start a wake effect as in some start in front, and from the sides, “slide” past you…The harder they press the faster they slide, The faster/harder they slide the more damage they do to themselves off of the blades…..

Max speed 20–25 mil/hr
Max load 1 ton (2200lbs)

We are currently working on a “Clean Sweep” vehicle used for infected extermination

@coffeenut I think you definitely just made the team. :P I was just going to say I’d put some extra armor on the rental trucks. Yours might be better.

@incendiary_dan lol, like I said, A fortress within a week

A FSRU can be built in 7hrs

@coffeenut I think I need a demonstration of that. Bring on the zombies!

Okay, I am composing an answer in my head but I am sick as a dog tonight and I need to go to bed so I will fill you all in on my brilliant plan tomorrow!

@KatawaGrey Time for a “How to get medicine in the zombie apocalypse” thread? Get better!

@incendiary_dan – Do you think it would be possible to collect enough rain-water to support x number of people? Once the tap water goes off, and if there are no rivers near the big box, water would become a big problem. Even if you get enough to drink, what would you do about sanitation, and water for the plants? It depends on how much it rains, too, of course.

Also, what sort of zombies they are matters for the purposes of securing a stationary fortress. Can they call to one another? That is, could the whole building potentially get surrounded by an enormous crowd? Are they faster or stronger than humans? Could enough of them potentially break down any barricades we constructed?

Also, the medicine joke brings up a good point. If people are going to live in the big box long term, they will eventually need medicine and possibly someone with medical training. So…raid a hospital with @coffeenut ‘s vehicle, and also take a bunch of medical textbooks?

Oh, and I would also need to raid a bookstore and a Library, and a music store.

@Hobbes Excellent point. At first I was going to say that I guess it depends on the number of people. I was thinking that a group of survivors would probably be about a dozen, and likely no more than two dozen. We require about a gallon of water per day per person, but two would be more preferable for washing and such. Two dozen people each using two gallons a day would use 17,520 gallons a year. If such a project were started during a rainy season, then it wouldn’t be too much trouble to set up a store of water for later when it’s dry. The average Home Depot is about 130,000 square feet, which is at least 18 million square inches, so one inch of rain is over 18 million cubic inches, or about 80,000 gallons. The lowest average rainfall per state is Arizona at 7.11 inches a year, which would translate to over 560,000 gallons a year. Just hooking the downspouts up to rainwater barrels (which I’m surprised they don’t do, now that I think about it) and you’re fine. You won’t even be able to store it all, and it’ll probably be a huge job just changing the barrels a few times a day during even minor storms. So the limit on water collection really has to do with how many buckets and barrels you have (which I think given only what is in a store is probably something like two or three thousand gallons worth of storage at one time), and your filtration capabilities.

We could also save a lot of water in the garden by planting polycrops in designs implementing companion planting (particularly the Three Sisters) and permaculture. These strategies essentially use plants that cooperate and synergize by doing things like producing nutrients the others need, or using broad leaves to shade the ground and preserve water. That should greatly increase the productivity/water use ratio. The hardest part about keeping the garden watered would be getting the water back up to the roof.

I was imagining shamblers, classic Romero style zombies, at least for the majority, and I assume sound and smell is their primary means of detecting us. I guess a good solid wall topped with razor wire is the best defense there, provided there are armed defenders behind it.

As far as medicine goes, a Home Depot or Lowes actually has the stuff needed to produce small amounts of antibiotics, and probably lots of other ointments and salves and such. A lot of that capability depends on the success of the garden. @hobbitsubculture and I make natural antiobiotic preparations out of garlic(which I would bet the bulbs would survive) and grain alcohol, the latter of which can be produced easily in a still heated by a blowtorch or a small rocket stove, and of course looted from the liquor store. Looting supplies from pharmacies and hospitals where possible is of course also a good idea, obviously, as are the medical books. Antibiotics tend not to store well, so in particular those we should be able to make ourselves (as well as disinfectants, styptics, and analgesics).

For training, I’m trained in First Aid and Wilderness First Aid officially, and occasionally study military guides on field medicine. I’ll be getting CPR training on Friday, as will one of my brothers. I also have a small library of my own on natural medicine, and half my family is pretty well versed in natural cures. My brother-in-law is a doctor. In the event that you don’t have anyone like us on your team, I think the basics of first aid treatment and perhaps some natural remedies would do a lot to improve the general state of the group. These can be learned in books, so yes, raiding bookstores and libraries would definitely be a good idea. Most maladies in SHTF scenarios involve problems in sanitation, and properly executed composting toilets combined with boiling and disinfecting lots of surfaces (there are lots of cleaning supplies over near garden) should prevent most of those.

I love using these sorts of scenarios as backdrops for figuring out ingenious and useful things to do with everyday objects, in case that wasn’t obvious already.

Wow, I had no idea you could collect that much rain-water! That’s pretty incredible. Though I’m sure there would be some loss since you couldn’t cover every square inch in water-capture devices. Also, the water might go bad if stored for long periods of time.

I didn’t either until I did the math while typing that. It’s immense. Consider the difference, since my parents’ home could only gather about 3.9 gallons for each inch of rain. I doubt the apartment building I live in could gather much more. Edit: Wait, I got that wrong. It’s about 500 gallons per inch of rain on a small house like my parents. Time to go buy rain barrels.

A couple drops of unscented bleach (I think I’ve seen that at Home Depot) per gallon of water is proper treatment for storage, and a good filtration system would take care of that too. Filtration can be as simple as a 5 gallon bucket with a few holes in the bottom, some mesh screen and layers of charcoal and play sand. And of course boiling works in a pinch. Powdered/crystal chlorine stores better, so I would hope the store our zombie team finds sells hot tubs.

I would Highly recommend staying away from Hospitals….As they are great for medicine/medical supplies…..They are also Zombie “hot spots” especially if we are dealing with the “wanderer” zombies…... With the narrow dark hallways, hundreds of rooms, thousands of previous “sick” occupants easily able of being turned…..

I would recommend sticking to pharmacys and Walk-In Dr offices…

Also I wouldn’t stay at the Hardware Store very long…..enough time to build 5–7 FSRU’s (per truck) and load up cube trucks with any other supplies wanted and move on.
I would prefer to settle in a Mall type building but not until I had enough supplies to be able to “clean it out”….Malls usually have multi levels with limited outside access… A lot of natural light supplied by skylights…. Stores that can be converted into “housing areas”... Large flat roofs for water collection/food growth…. Large 360 parking lot (no unknown surprises)....And usually close to urban areas for future “raids”....

@coffeenut Wow, I didn’t even think of the fact that hospitals would be swarming with undead. Shame on me.

You make a good point about the mall, but everything I’ve learned in movies and comics has pointed to the fact that malls have lots of zombies too, for some reason.

For my knowledge, what can i find in that kind of store? Our big stores are generally very specific, but you guys seem to imply i could find pretty much anything in a home depot. Could you give me a hint?

@incendiary_dan You were worried about the cities being crowded and you didn’t think about hospitals being deathtraps? Even with all the horror movies that have been set in hospitals since the dawn of cinema?

@Thammuz Let’s see, how to describe the insanity that is a Home Depot (or Lowe’s). Like I said, the average size is around 130,000 square feet, and the shelving often goes up forty feet. They fill all of the shelving, and will attempt to fit as much merchandise in as they possibly can, often going beyond what is safe. Space between shelving is only just enough for the forklifts to get through and move things on and off of the the shelves. The intent is to have warehouses that you shop in. They basically have all the essentials for construction and home improvement and then some, though specialty items aren’t usually there. They also tend to have well stocked garden sections, but they never have any sort of heirloom varieties and not many exotics.

And yea, that was a blindspot of ‘duh!’ proportions. I had even been reading The Walking Dead yesterday, which begins in a zombie infested hospital.

@incendiary_dan Yes they do, But their numbers are limited as well as their ability to swarm… So taking a mall will be a lot of work….but the benefits of having a mall as a home base would make the risks worth it….

And securing a mall…...these are the steps we came up with

1— (Bladed/spike weapons only, firearms backup only) Start at the top floor…most Top floors in a mall have few(if any) outside access points (mall or store) That can easily (temp) barricades….and with zombie’s difficulties with stairs the top floor will be the least infested.. Divide floor into sectors mall maps are great (entrance points, stair areas, small stores, large stores) then group sectors (that are close to each other) into groups A,B,C,D…. Depending on how many combat teams you have 3 or 4 people each is how you split up M groups….. once the groups are assigned each strike team is sent out 5 min apart (to keep the hall zombies migrating) than lastly the “hallway team” (at least 5) is sent.

The smaller teams need to be fast through the hallway using mall obstacles as much as possible. The hallway team needs to start at the back of the “wave” placing AZS“s “Helicopters” across the hallway (to contain the rest) and AZC’s “Fans” placed at stair tops.
And then clear the rest.

2— Main floor is going to be the worst infested. So using balconies you can lower either a ZDT “Nut Cracker” or (If you have access to the other side of balcony) you could use a MDT “Swing” to clear a area (multiple times)... Using the staircase as your main entrance point repeat first step.

But ya it would be a lot of work cleaning up after…but in the end it would be worth it.

@incendiary_dan Ok. I’m officially amazed. Would i find something along the line of car spare parts as well? If not then assume that i would scavenge the tires from forklifts or abandoned cars in the parking lot.

Ok, keeping in mind I’m more of a nomadic survivor, my objective being reaching my villa, here’s what I’d do:

First and foremost: fortify employee lounges and offices to use as facilities while there. Working on the info you gave me i would reinforce the doors, mount 2×4s on door hinges so they can be barred and unbarred with ease (sliding them into apposite blocks), I’d solder metal panes with small holes in them to all windows of the ground floor on the inside, to let a little light shine through without being visible from the outside.

Then i would build:

An armor made of a layer of disjointed fiberglass plating with slices of car tires over it, covering the holes between the plates and the plating itself (rubber tires are pretty hart to chow through but are flexible enough to work, as long as they’re not inside the joints)

A long blade (possibly sword-like) rigged with a car battery (to be carried around in a backpack) that makes it incandescent, making it useful for cauterization as well.

Several Molotov cocktails, nail bombs, pipe bombs and the like.

Then, assuming i have people with me I’d build a tank:

-Take a shopping cart filled with tanks of gasoline mixed with packing peanuts (they dissolve in gasoline making a dense, sticky, napalm-like, flammable substance) rigged to a separate manual pump (for spraying), remove its lower part so that only the steel cage-like part with the tanks (All conveniently duct taped together) remains.
-Barricade the loading/unloading entrance of the shop, take two cars and lock the doors behind you.
-Take the front seats of the smallest cart. Put the tanks of napalm in the trunk of the other, put a hole through the upper part of the trunk so that the hand pump can be passed through.
-Solder the two seats back to back on top of the car, add duct tape for added endurance.
-Solder any metal plating available (possibly something that doesn’t bend or otherwise deform easily) to the outside of the car and to the roof, enclosing the two added seats with plating but leaving enough space to see outside and use the hand pump (obviously also build a door of some sort). Add three or four beer cases filled with Molotov cocktails to the turret.
-Build bladed substitutes for the bumpers and mount them.

Then, before leaving:

Equip everyone with nail guns. Build armors for everyone. Duct tape an oar to two chainsaws and a sledgehammer to two fireaxes because fuck zombies. Stock up on everything, especially duct tape. Load up the car and fill the tank. Leave.

AZS- (AntiZombie System) Is a 6ft pole attached to a quad frame by circle barring rings, folding blades are attached in 4 spots along the pole, In the base there is a electric motor chain attached to the pole…. So it spins fast…. working on a non motorized one

AZC- (AntiCrawler Zombie) Is a Fan based design with 3 blades 4ft long attached to electric motor… working on a non-motorized one

ZDT- (Zombie Decapitation Tool) Is a double bucket claw design except with blades and rope operated (one for lowering, One for opening/closing) Weights about 30 lbs

MDT- (Multiple Decapitation Tool) is 2 10ft poles bolted together with a 5inch gap between them, held on each end with rope, with 2 layers V blades along each side. With 10lb weights along the length. Swung at neck hight

@coffeenut That’s fucking awesome.

@Thammuz lol thanks…We wrote a Zombie book in 09 and spent a month just on weapon and vehicle ideas.. Some of them are really fucked and would make a big mess if used

My favorite is…...

“The Umbrella”

ZRU- Zombie Removal Unit

Basically it`s a steel pole (with handles halfway down) in a tri-base (surrounded by pressure plates) bolted to the ground. 18 Steel bars (with teeth blades wrapped the length of the pole) are attached at the top with industrial hinges. The unit is attached to industrial springs at the bottom, so the top is twisted counter clockwise 30 times and locked in place, The top bars are Torqued (pulled) down the sides and locked to the base…

So the Zombie comes along, Steps on a plate releasing the locks, Than the unit “opens” like a umbrella wile spinning….all within a few seconds… Turing a Zombie into confetti…

Not really Practical but fun..lol and I get to use it in this book…yay

@coffeenut It might be complex, but it still sounds like an effective zombie trap. I dig that. I’m into trapping.

@incendiary_dan Really? Think you could help me? I’m stuck on a door trap…

Ok, this is to address the swarm outside the building door problem…

You’ve been through a revolving door right?

This door is similar except:

1— There are two separate spinning bar(blades) doors

2— Wile one spins in the other spins out
overlapping like this:

out)——————————-
——————————-(in
out)——————————
——————————-(in
out)——————————
and so on

3— The bars(blades) are closer together so only one Zombie at a time

4— The area outside starts out wide (enough to cover other doors next to this one) then narrows to the width of this “standard door” / \

5— Once the first Zombie enters and is trapped, the Zombie pack behind it pressing on the next bars slice the trapped Zombie wile the next Zombie enters…and so on…

6— The bars are only bladed on one side

7— ??????

So once we have Zombie sushi how do we(automated) dispose of it without stopping the process? Or having to monitor (in case it gets full..)?

Any Ideas?

@coffeenut you could periodically block the door and use a shovel but that would lead to buttloads of rotting meat around the place… what if you dug a hole in the ground under the door, under the last part covered by the rotation of the door? Ideally a hole that goes all the way down to the basement. It wouldn’t be really all that safe an idea because some partially unmauled zombie might get through but aside for that it’s a quick and easy way to dispose of the remains. You’d get a cellar full of mangled zombie giblets though.

@Thammuz…..We thought of something like that…..But as you said we would basicly have a lake of rotten zombie bits/fluid…...
Some ideas were….
– Partially filling the hole with Hydrochloric acid to dissolve the zombie pieces…But causes a lot of problems…..

- Pieces falling into a crematorium oven and the ashes being blown into the room….But that has a lot of problems too…

@coffeenut yeah, there really is no solution to that kind of problem, if you kill dozeons of zombies in an enclosed space either you find some way to dispose of them chemically (acid, fire, as you suggested) or you let them pile up. Both are bad but the crematorium option seems doable.

After all there should be a furnace (or something of that sort) in the basement to keep the heating going, right?

You could just periodically pour gasoline on the pile and light it.

Yea, as long as you’re not constantly besieged you can probably get out once in a while and siphon gas. Gas stays good for a few years. Plus, there is always plenty of kerosene in the paint section (legally, I think hardware stores are required to carry a certain amount for some reason), but that would probably best be saved for lamps and such.

And actually, as far as I know those types of stores never have basements. All the heating and cooling is done by machines on the roof. And, believe it or not, controlled hundreds of miles away, so anyone who got electricity running would need to bypass that to turn on lights and ventilation and such. The store I worked at in RI was controlled in GA, as were most or all of the east coast stores.

@Thammuz @Hobbes One of the problems from one book I read is there is a possibility of infection by breathing the smoke particles coming off a burning zombie…
Another issue is the smell of burning flesh (it goes through every little crack)
So burning is out….

Hardware stores carry industrial gas masks. Burning shouldn’t be a problem.

@incendiary_dan You would need at least medical/military grade gas masks….and a hazmat suit….For everyone….(the natural air flow would contaminate the whole building)

Well, even if it was somehow able to survive fire, which I doubt for any virus (and most likely zombies would be caused by parasites), if you move the pile outside occasionally for burning it should still work. If it was something that contagious, you’d need to be wearing protective gear constantly anyway.

And there are also full body suits. Industrial and military gas masks all use the same sort of filtration system: activated carbon.

@coffeenut As long as the fire is hotter than 100°C you’re good. No microorganism survives above that.

@incendiary_dan lol, Our “laws” don’t necessarily apply to fake viruses….. remember we are dealing with a virus that re-animates dead cells…One bite, scratch, drop of blood/saliva will cause you to turn…. Some viruses are heat resistant and can easily survive long enough (unless flash burned) to transfer to the “smoke” a collection of airborne solid and liquid particulates and gases…...

The virus in our book has mutated from the original strain the first book and is a tougher and more resilient….So surviving fire is a possibility…

For the sake of this conversation, let’s say it’s able to be burned. We still have the protective gear, and so can burn corpses away from the fortified store. The only differences between the commercial protective gear and the military versions are that the latter are more tear resistant , the masks don’t need to be changed as often, and they have radiation shielding.

And of course, we could also just use battery acid.

@incendiary_dan Well the “door” is 7ft high with blades every foot so each zombie through could end up in 18 pieces…. So a small swarm of 30 zombies….we could have 540+ zombie pieces…So how do we get them from the door to the parking lot to burn them?

Hmmm. Snow shovels?

@coffeenut Unless we’re talking magic no organic cell can survive 100°C.

Okay, I’m feeling well enough to answer now. Please forgive me but I haven’t read a good portion of the above responses. Know that I love all you fine folk anyway!

I think the very first thing to do once we got anywhere would be to take stock of supplies. We’d have to figure out what weapons we had and figure out who could use what. If we were short of weapons, I’d arm those folks least qualified to use the firearms we have with sharp things like gardening shears and pickaxes depending on how well equipped the hardware store is. I’d also take stock of food though cleaning out the vending machines would certainly help and medical supplies. If someone needs heart meds and we’re almost out, that would become priority numero uno. I would send out one of my strongest with a team of two or three equipping them with one of my long-range walkie talkies to go and fin the necessary medication with strict orders to be back within three days and to pick up anything useful found along the way.

Then, once that team had been dispatched, I would assess everyone’s strengths and weaknesses. Do we have an elderly engineer on the team? Okay, he doesn’t need to fight but I bet he could build some beastly zombie traps. A registered dietitian who couldn’t fire a gun to save her life? It’s her job to figure out how to maximize the nutritional intake from our food supplies. It’s also her job to tell the team I sent out what to look out for if we are severely deficient in a certain, necessary nutrient group.

Then, I would figure out the best avenues of escape both from the building and the town we’re trapped in another excellent job for the team that’s been sent out. My first choice would be escape because, no matter how well-equipped we are now, we are going to run out of supplies eventually.

Finally, I’d asses the vehicle situation in the parking lot. I’d assemble the remaining able-bodied folk and collect as much gas as I could and put it into the vehicle that could both hold all of us and was in good working order. Once the team had come back, we would book it out of there before the zombies got there.

@Thammuz lol….(I would classify a virus that brings back the dead as magic….—Most Viruses are active up to 70deg, But there are few Viruses that are still active at up to80 – 90deg/c….

So a average Zombie BT would likely be between 65–70 (newly turned) to about 35–50 (massive Degeneration).... varies per type of zombie

Now with wanting to kill the virus fast, The piece of body dropped into the “fire” would need to have the outside surface equally heated to 100deg within milliseconds and the core heated evenly heated to 100 within 1 second of contact. To stop fluid/flesh from boiling or Thick smoke from forming…... something like dicyanoacetylene gas, Burns at 5260 K (4990 °C

With the design of the “door” as a continues flow (during swarms) of zombie pieces it isn’t possible to heat each piece to “flash point”.... Or if we “saved” them until after to burn in the parking lot with gasoline that would be worse the cloud off of that pile would be huge…

…...Unless… They have the setup of a conveyor belt between the “zombie door” and the real door that goes to the parking lot and the a bottom bar “sweeps” the pieces onto the belt, so when the zombie door turns it also moves the conveyor belt along to the parking lot where they have a “blast Furnace” type object…. That is hooked up to the dicyanoacetylene gas (like the furnace in Aliens 2) salvaged from the industrial gas cutting factory…. So the convayor belt takes the prices to the top of the container and dumps them into the 5000 deg fire vaporizing them….. now I just need to figure out the details

I was thinking more along the lines of “build a big fucking furnace, collect the meat in the cellar, periodically cremate it.”

Or you could boil it before hand. Boiling sterilizes, so it would probably be ok.

Also you keep assuming that any virus can survive being airborne, but if that was the case then you wouldn’t need to be bitten by a zombie to turn into one, just being near them would be enough. And if that’s the case we have bigger problems than how to dispose of the mauled zombies.

@Thammuz We designed the virus so that if you burn a zombie wrong (ie:gas and matches) The Virus would become airborne and Highly infectious, But it’s just when It’s on fire, when not it’s a normal zombie…

I just want to let you all know that you have amused me immensely for almost an hour. Thank you!

Now, I know very little about technical/mechanical things, but I have seen a lot of zombie movies. Where are we? I’m assuming we’re in the US and we can raid a firearms store/the local walmart :P. We can use the FSRUs to make it there and back relatively safely. Firearms are quite effective against zombies, however, I think they should only be used as a last resort in the face of overwhelming odds.

I would have one caution about the revolving door system. Wouldn’t it be possible for the zombies to break the glass in the door itself or is it too thick? This could cause a problem.

I personally think that if we are moving from a HD/Lowes to a mall, we should bring a vast quantity of building supplies. While this may cause additional risks/casulaties, I think it will be worth it. I feel that we should board up every exit. Don’t worry about making funnels and fields of fire. Just board the entire place up like a fortress. We could get massive amounts of rope and thick twine and construct rope ladders for exit and entry from the mall. Therefore, we could seal up every entrance like Fort Knox and this would limit the number of active defenders/sentries we need at any given point. This would free up more people for gardening and other essential tasks.

One good method for zombie entry prevention would be seasonal in nature. If it’s wintertime, we could use the front end loaders/tractors that many malls have for snow removal. We could use one to bring in those massive concrete medians to make an even greater obstacle and deterrent for zombie entry near doorways. I also feel the front end loaders could be brought into a docking bay/garage and modified to be quite the raiding vehicle.

@Schroedes13 lol, This was a great thread…

The revolving Door units are to be placed in front of the “main doors” with the glass in between (as a barrier). This is primarily an Unmanned Extinction Weapon. ie: use their overwhelming numbers against them.

I was writing these answers at work so they were just the highlights… The book we just finished is alot more detailed.