Social Question

wundayatta's avatar

How do you coexist with your AWOL memory?

Asked by wundayatta (58321 points ) March 24th, 2011

Due to the fixing of the rewards, I thought someone had just passed 30K, when they did so two months ago. So I went and wrote another paean to her. Then, I realized her party had been two months ago, and I felt foolish. As a result, I’m training myself to not care about being a fool and doing things I might otherwise be embarrassed about.

I have a number of other memory issues. I also forget key words at work. For that, my workaround is to describe the thing I mean instead of using it’s name. Another workaround is that, when writing answers here, I often forget a word that I want to use. Because I’m not in a personal conversation, I can use an online thesaurus to retrieve the word I needed.

Names? Well I never remembered names. Although to ask a second time for a name, and then ten seconds later to ask for it a third time—I think it’s not just my memory. I’m also not paying attention. That’s a faux pas.

What kinds of holes are there in your memory? What are your coping strategies for dealing with holes in your memory? How do you deal with the responses you get because of the things you’ve forgotten?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

17 Answers

JilltheTooth's avatar

After chemo my memory went south on vacation and hasn’t come home yet. I make lots of lists, do crossword puzzles and stuff like that, apologize, explain, and I’m very creative with descriptions when I lose words. My keys and purse and phone and remotes are always in the same places, even if it’s inconvenient to put them back. And I’m still perceived as a nincompoop because I don’t remember simple recent things. Or maybe because I actually am a nincompoop. That’s OK, it’s a cool word, I don’t mind.

AmWiser's avatar

My mind (wherever it is) works well when it interacts with myself. But when trying to talk or write I lose my thoughts and forget what I wanted to say or write. Hence, most of the short answers I have given;)
(I hope that made some kind of sense).

anartist's avatar

I just did that myself, when @Marinelife ‘s 49k announcement was reposted. Just laugh.

I only worry when it is something really bizarre, like forgetting the name of my boyfriend of 7 years whom I went to high school with when introducing him to my boss. Or taking someone out to meet a potential employer whom I had known many years in the past and not recognizing him because the picture in my mind was from the past even though I had had lunch with him the preceding week. There is nothing to do for those fugues except endure it and hope everybody forgets soon—knowing they won’t. [these lapses were during my salad days and while sober]

For me these things are often caused by stress. And under extreme stress, I forgot once how to do addition [I am a designer and measurements are critical] and was folding little bits of paper to count the folds, hoping no one was looking.

So I try to keep as much stress out of my life as possible. I also make notes of anything i want to remember while at the computer using notepad and leave them on the desktop til I dump them or record them more permanently.

Skaggfacemutt's avatar

I have the same kind of memory problems, but I noticed that it is only if I am sleep-deprived. I tried going to bed earlier on week nights, and that helped.

Zyx's avatar

Logic and experience are basic. So your memory holds on to these things tightly. When imprinting something new, you try to pass off as many of the aspects to what you already knew. I don’t really forget anymore, because I know what I’m going to learn before I learn it.

Not precognition yet.

thorninmud's avatar

I outsource my memory.

My wife, who has been something of an enabler, keeps track of upcoming events and obligations in matters relating to home and family and prompts me as necessary. I have other mnemonically gifted people on whom I lean heavily in other domains of my life. They good-naturedly watch my back.

And I store much of the rest in the cloud. Information I think may save my butt later, I’ll send to my Gmail account where I can retrieve it with a keyword search from anywhere.

anartist's avatar

@thorninmud cloud works for me too. And I usually star it when it comes in.

thorninmud's avatar

@anartist Yep, me too. That way, even if I can’t remember a keyword, I can still just sort out all the starred messages.

Ladymia69's avatar

Forget about it.

everephebe's avatar

@wundayatta There’s this fluther party for everyone who “just achieved,” 40K, 30K, 20K, 10K, or 5K. I’m pretty bad with names too. My memory is a little holy at times, I blush when it’s exposed. Also I forget words, and then hours or days later, blurt them out while shaking my head/fist.

6rant6's avatar

I can’t remember what I said.

People are always quoting me to me. I often say, “That sounds good, where’d you come up with that?” and they say, “You said it last week/year/decade.” I could try to play it off as humorous preening, but too many people know me too well.

I am an empty vessel. Leaking everywhere. Pass the duct tape.

cak's avatar

PFFFFT. Amateur. Chemo, cerebral aneurysm…memory? What memory? We ran into the doctor that performed my aneurysm surgery, over the weekend, I had no clue who he was…talk about embarrassing. Even better, he realized it, made note of it and said, “Can’t wait to see you again, on Monday!” Evidently, I have a recheck on Monday. Here I thought I was doing so much better!

Age, better living through chemicals and things that mess with our brains suck. That’s the word for it…suck! It’s ok, We all have our quirks. Laugh it off!

JilltheTooth's avatar

Hey, @cak , I know we’re doing the twin thing, but can I have a pass on the aneurysm, please???

cak's avatar

@JilltheTooth Please, take the pass! :)

Bellatrix's avatar

I so hear you @wundayatta! I went to the doctors today and needed the word progeny… it was gone. It had left my brain. I was left going on about people who follow those who were born first.. those of us following our ancestors… until she said ..progeny. YES! That word.

I hate this memory lapse thing and totally empathise with you. I am now fairly honest about it and say “having an alzheimers/seniors moment/what is that called???” Or if that wouldn’t be appropriate, I try to take my time and speak slowly and calmly and hope that the words will be there when I need them.

majorrich's avatar

I suffer from post traumatic stress disorder. I have memories that are ‘encapsulated’ and are not accessed by my conscious memory. Apparently they do their damage under cover. Occasionally my counselors and I open a box of memories and after reliving the experience and talking about it, the pain is supposed to reduce by my acceptance of what happened. In the meantime, I take a lot of psychoactive drugs.

Answer this question




to answer.
Your answer will be saved while you login or join.

Have a question? Ask Fluther!

What do you know more about?
Knowledge Networking @ Fluther