How many times have you been rejected?

More times than I care to admit. The only thing good about it, is that later (sometimes only many, many years later) do you realize that you dodged some bullets. It’s too bad that you can’t see it that way in the very first seconds after you’ve been rejected. I hope you feel better soon. You deserve better, let this bullet whiz by. : )

Never, but only because I’ve never had the guts to make the first move! I say good on you for being courageous, even if you didn’t get the result you want. You miss all the shots you don’t take.

Of course I don’t care when I’m rejected, but it really irks me when the woman turns me down in a way that suggests she’s too good for me. I simply walked up to a young lady and said, “Hi, how’s it goin?. She looked me up and down and sounded so disgusted when she said, “Uh, hellooo”, then looked away. I was sad, for 2 minutes…lol.

It was my 16th birthday, and after “graduating myself” from high school (later, losers) I went immediately to the military recruitment place. They said I was too young (LIARS!!!!!) and to come back in 2 years (This was 1986). I would have gone back, but I already had a job I been working for 2 years, so it looks like the military lost out on this one.

This all worked for the best, anyway. I got a great deal in my job, and I never had to deal with an incompitant boss like I would have 6 years later if I had been accepted to the military
The government rejected me? Man, yet another bonehead move brought to you by the grand government and the public sector ideals.

Several times by 2 women, who later both wanted me back.
Several times by several other women.
All this actually helped me stay committed to my wife, but also, unfortunately, damaged me in how much I allow myself to care for others.

Tons of times. It’s worse when you’re older! At least older people will just come out and say “I don’t think there is a connection”. When you’re younger it’s a lot of excuses.

But it gets better. You will find someone. There are lots of people who don’t have the courage to ask. You are way ahead of them.

I don’t think I could really count the times.

When I was 20-something, there was this guy. We got along so well, I really liked him. I decided to try to ask him out; however, I failed miserably. Turns out, I’m not the asking-the-guy-out type. What was worse, when I tried to suck it up and be okay with things, he started dating a friend. I don’t think we stayed friends for too long after I found out. I just didn’t handle that one too well.

Job: I just knew I was the perfect candidate for a new position within the company I was working for…and I even heard whispers of a pending offer. I made it through the formal interviews, went to lunch with the head of the department and then got the rejection letter. They wanted someone with more experience. I also learned a very important lesson, never, ever count your chickens before they hatch. That one sucked. I continued to work there and later was promoted to another department.

The very first place I wanted to rent, they rejected me because I was too young. I was very frustrated, it felt like I was having a hard time finding a place, due to age. My first place was not exactly what I had in mind, and I slept with one eye open, for a long time.

I think the hardest rejection isn’t really rejection, but it sure felt that way. I have two children. One of them really relies on me, due to his age and also certain situations. The older child is a lot like me, and that means we can butt heads, a bit. She’s showing her independence in a big way now, and that’s a good thing. For the first time, though, I’m finding it hard to find my way with her. I’m still wanting to be in serious “mom” mode with her, but she’s 17. She’s pulling away and really growing up. Another friend (and mother) pointed out that this is a good thing. She’s heading down the right path and it has a lot to do with how she was raised. It doesn’t always feel that way, though.

Gosh, it feels like so many times. I rejected my own self before others could reject me a lot of the time. It’s actually been a life long pattern. Rejection was so painful to me that I would rather control the situation by breaking it apart sooner, instead of waiting for some random time where the other person decides they’ve had enough of me.

Yet, despite all those rejections, I’ve had many acceptances. You can’t break up with someone if you haven’t been together with them first. If you count the number of women who have fallen in love with me, it’s like being some kind of Don Juan. If you count the number who have broken up with me, I look like such a total loser.

I don’t like accept/reject situations, and I learned to never put myself in them if I could help it. Usually people don’t like to say “no” to a person, so they hide it, and say it in indirect ways. I became adept at seeing the signs of rejection. Perhaps too adept. It’s hard for me to not see it—just about everywhere.

It seems to me that rejection is a kind of state of mind. You can expect it and get it. You can never expect it. You can be like @Blackberry and never even think about it. I have tended to take rejection very seriously in my life. I’m not sure how helpful that has been. If I stop caring about what people think, then I can be myself more happily, and maybe I’ll feel that rejection is someone else’s loss instead of mine.

But I’m attached to the people I love, and it hurts badly when they reject me. I really don’t see any way around that. On the other hand, I am very passionate, and I love deeply, with all my heart and soul. I throw my life into my love. I don’t regret that at all. I have been hurt many times, but it’s still worth it. When I find love, it puts me out of my body and mind with joy and it makes me feel good about myself. I love that feeling. I’ll take it any time I can get it. It makes my life worthwhile.

I may have been rejected an awful lot, but I really had no choice. Without love, I am miserable. Nothing. With it, I am everything. Ecstatic. There is really no in between for me. I used to fight that, but that was rejecting myself. There’s no percentage in that. If at least I accept that this is who I am, I can stop beating myself up for being that person who needs love so much, he’ll endure anything to get it.

In my life, I haven’t been dumped..either I left them or the break was mutual…I have been rejected from 3 schools throughout the past 10 years, I suppose that counts.

Haven’t been rejected but I do fear it, which in turn makes me all the more afraid of pursuing anything with anyone.