What can I do about my problem with peoples names?

) May 2nd, 2011

So. I have a very good memory, I can remember more or less anything. But I have a big problem remembering peoples names.

A few years ago, as I finally grew up I started having lots of phylosophycal ideas and thoughts. One particular thing that crossed my mind was that insults are not offensive as they are really just vibrating air put in motion by a piece of wet meat. A similar thought was that people are not their name, that a name is just a noise we use for designation.

Since these thoughts I paid less and less attention to peoples names, to the point where I got quite bad at remembering peoples names. If your name was Cornelious or Xaniqua or something unusual I would probably remember it. But if your name was jack or bob, there is no chance I would remember it.

Now, to extend the problem, I am working in a hotel, where clients come in an out all the time. After the first week I gave up ever trying to learn any of their names.

This is the current situation….

I don’t know my bosses name. I think its Tony, it could be Juan im not sure. I know two of the waiters names upstairs, but have no idea as to the other 17 staff in the hotel.

I am surrounded by 200–300 people at any given moment, and I have no idea what any of their names are. I don’t know the name of the guy who sells me my cigarettes, I dont know the name of my butcher, postman or doctor either.

I have tried to reverse the process, by actually caring about peoples names again, but its not working. I don’t know if its that I have not cared for so long, or if maybe I still don’t care and am just delluding my self that I am trying.

There is actually a woman that I like that I have met recently and have been talking to for about a week. I have plans to ask her out next week once I get paid and can take her some place nice if she accepts. I can tell you the color of her eye, hair, height, facial details, I can tell you her schedule, her favorite drink, color, and car model. But after tricking her in to telling me her name 4 times, I still can’t remember it. When I say I can’t remember it, I mean I don’t even have a vague clue like the first letter of her name.

What can I do about this name remembering problem?

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5 Answers

Keep saying their name when you talk to them – though you might end up sounding like a creepy salesmen i am not implying that all salemen are creepy, just the ones that say your name a lot.

Writing their name down would help as long as you can match the name with the person. But do it subtly! Get them to give you their phone number or email address and make them write/spell their name, then write who they are beside it. No need to be low tech and use a scrap of paper – most phones also have the option to add details.

Stinley (11525

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“A similar thought was that people are not their name, that a name is just a noise we use for designation.” – perhaps, but isn’t anything and everything then just a noise? Do you remember your name? Why?

Simone_De_Beauvoir (39052

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If the problem is that bad, start saying to them when your on your own with them ‘sorry I completely forgot your name just now, what is it again?’ ...then keep saying it in your head until you get a chance to write it down and then memorise it later. People don’t like when you forget their name, especially when they’ve known yours for weeks/months.

lemming (3918

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I have a frriend who had a great talent for remembering the names of characters in movies, yet he couldn’t remember the names of the people with whom he worked day in/day out. I challenged him to assign a fictional role to his co-workers and give that fictional persona the person’s “real” name. Sounds weird, I know—but I think some tricks are called for when one has mental block around something. Amazingly, it seemed to do the trick. Good luck with anything you try!

picante (11498

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Someone I worked with as a camp counselor was terrible with names, so we just nicknamed every bunk in our cabin. Although the girls changed every week, we kept those nicknames all summer. Thus, we only had to remember eight names. For some reason all the girls who chose the “Scooter” bunk were really strange.

sliceswiththings (11723

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