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Mischiv's avatar

How do I get my guy friend to talk about my chick friend?

Asked by Mischiv (40 points ) May 2nd, 2011

A guy friend of mine has been sending mixed signals to another friend. She wants me to subtlety get him to talk about her. I don’t know how to do that. I need to know soon though before he goes to bed.

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11 Answers

sliceswiththings's avatar

It’s doubtful that he’ll be up for that talk. He’ll immediately know that whatever he says will make it back to the other girl, and probably won’t spill anything. I think the best you can do is just say as many good things about that friend as possible, without making it obvious.

BarnacleBill's avatar

Stay out of other people’s drama. You will live longer.

gailcalled's avatar

This is your girl friend’s issue. Let her learn how to relate to this guy and how to read the signals. They aren’t that difficult. If they’re mixed, that means “Run away.”

cheebdragon's avatar

Maybe you should just stay out of it…? Your friend has no business dating if she can’t do this herself.

Kardamom's avatar

Can you describe what kinds of things the guy friend does that the girl friend considers to be mixed signals? If we knew a little bit more about what he is actually doing and saying, it might be more obvious to some of us that have been around the block a few times to make a good guess at how he feels about her.

Kardamom's avatar

Oh yeah, please don’t use the word “chick” for girls and women either. It’s kind of degrading.

cheebdragon's avatar

(Reading slang makes me feel a little less intelligent, everytime.)

Pandora's avatar

Tell him that you’ve seen how a certain guy (some guy with a rep as being a player) seems to look at her and that you think he likes her. If he has no reaction than he is probably not interested. If he starts to say things like she deserves better than, ask him like who. Of course it could mean he just cares for her as a friend but at least the first response would let her know that she’s not even on the radar.

koanhead's avatar

As silly as this girl is acting, I think “chick” might actually be appropriate, although “flibbertigibbet” would be rather better.
Also, the boy is being a “honyak” by shilly-shallying.

Beyond that, I heartily endorse the answer @BarnacleBill made. Stay out of it. If he’s your friend, and you think he likes her, encourage him to approach her. If she’s your friend and you think she likes him, encourage her to approach him. Do not intervene, interpret nor act as a messenger between them; let them sort it out.

Fieryspoon's avatar

http://www.amazon.com/Hes-Just-That-Into-Understanding/dp/068987474X

Paraphrased: If it’s not clear that he wants her, then he doesn’t want her. That’s really all there is to it. There aren’t extenuating circumstances. If she doesn’t know that he’s into her, then he’s not into her. End of story.

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