Social Question

Vincent_Lloyd's avatar

When you get into fights with your S/O do you two keep going or does one come to their senses?

Asked by Vincent_Lloyd (3007points) May 29th, 2011

Me and my S/O are doing fine, but I was just thinking…I wonder how many couples come to their senses when they’re fighting…That happened to me maybe a week or two ago….But I was the one that came to my senses and realized that we were fighting over something stupid and that we should stop before something terrible happens since we get hurt real easily… But do you guys come to your senses or do you two keep fighting up until one apologizes a couple of days, weeks, later? Like a reality show.

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10 Answers

rooeytoo's avatar

In my house there are 2 generals, no one is a mere soldier. It makes for heated battles! I tell him we should take turns backing down, but it usually falls to me to be the backer downer. And since I am very similar to the way you have described yourself in other questions, that is full of rage and anger from being ACOA, it sometimes takes me much longer than I would like before I do it. But I keep working on it, life is a process and I think it keeps going until the day I die.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

We don’t fight to that point. Generally, we talk things out rather calmly and if we need space, we give each other space and then make up. No screaming, we don’t think that’s right, no victimizing, no drama.

janbb's avatar

Us too – we discuss, we may need to take a break and think and then bring it up again. We do occasionally get angry but we don’t scream at each other.

snowberry's avatar

We stopped fighting many years ago. Occasionally we will have a disagreement, but one of us reminds the other what we’re about, we back down until we’re calm, then talk it out.

Aster's avatar

We never scream or fight. Nit-pik would be a better way to put it and I usually choose to end it.
Maybe “bicker” is a good word.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

We’re really quick to make up but that’s because we practice getting to the point of disagreement asap. We are both adults with past disappointing past modes arguing so for us, steps and “skits” work.

If we didn’t do this then I’d be scraping the flesh from his bones and he’d go silent and retreat, holding out as long as possible until he couldn’t stand it anymore.

YARNLADY's avatar

My partner refuses to fight. When I get angry, he simply leaves the room, or asks me to please listen to myself, which makes me calm down.

marinelife's avatar

When we fight now, it is a sign that something is wrong. We usually stop and discuss things.

El_Cadejo's avatar

We never really get into fights. We bicker sure but never serious fights. Im very thankful for that but I think thats because the attitude both of us take toward the relationship. We both love each other so fighting with one another is pretty pointless. This isnt to say there arent times where she drives me up a fucking wall or annoys the piss out of me. Spend enough time with anyone and that will happen. We usually both sensible enough to not let it get that far. Generally if its getting bad we just give each other some quite time to let ourselves cool down and then TALK ABOUT THE SITUATION. The talking afterwards is key. You cant just let it go and pretend nothing ever happened because then it just builds under the surface more and more until that volcano finally erupts and thats where the real nasty fights come from. If you talk it out you keep everything moving along smoothly.

casheroo's avatar

If I realize I’m wrong, I usually start smiling but keep arguing and then my husband will smile and tell me to shut up (in a joking way.) this happens often, but I still never admit I’m wrong.

We don’t usually have yelling matches..only when I’m about to get my period (how stereotypical).

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