If Death appears in his black robe, bony hands with scythe, telling you it's time, what will you say?
Of course this is just a hypothetical silly question more than anything else so yes, funny snappy responses will be great but serious philosophical answers are welcome too if you’re up to it. Thanks!
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“Lies!” Then I whack Death with a baseball bat.
@ANef_is_Enuf Lol. Hope I could think of a song to cheer you up. Just read your other post.
@mazingerz88 haha, it was set up so perfectly, I couldn’t resist. :)
Death be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadfull, for, thou art not so,
For, those, whom thou think’st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poore death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleepe, which but thy pictures bee,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee doe goe,
Rest of their bones, and soules deliverie.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poyson, warre, and sicknesse dwell,
And poppie, or charmes can make us sleepe as well,
And better then thy stroake; why swell’st thou then?
One short sleepe past, wee wake eternally,
And death shall be no more, death, thou shalt die.
– John Donne
I’d tell him to send me the more attractive version ^^
I wouldn’t say anything. I’d just shoot him.
Or show him my penis without a word. Surely the absurdity of such a situation would make him go away.
@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard this is probably an odd thing to say, but I would fear for the safety of your penis if your plan backfires. Just sayin’.
I will say, “Do you know you can save money in 15 minutes or less by switching to Geico?”
@PluckyDog And if that does not work then you know what’s coming next right? I’ll shriek out, “AFLAC! AFLAC! AFLAC!” Lol.
@ANef_is_Enuf, the first time I read that, I thought you said “you better take the safety off on your penis first” as though it were some type of firearm.
And then I read it again.
Are you accepting interns?
@Pied_Pfeffer I feel like that comment deserves a punchline rimshot.
Sheesh man, just let me finish writing this sentence and let me get to a natural pause…
Oh something like this I suppose.
Run away for my life.
I would have loved to ask where we were going since I’m a bit curious but too coward to do that.
I wouldn’t say a word – I’d just chain him like Sisyphus did to Thanatos.
I’d tell him to fuck me, and refuse to leave until he does. Though, if he actually did it.. well… well, I’d be FUCKED.
I’d tell him to bed over and drophis pants, he may be grim reaper but I’m the grim reamer.
As @zen and @flutherother have said before, I would do a riff on “The Seventh Sealhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anvRFJFUnRE
Perhaps a nice game of Monopoly…
Time to let the dogs out. They love bones.
F*ck you, mother f*cker!!!
“Ooh, hiya i’ve been expecting you…you old rascal! Now, about our destination, i’m hoping for volleyball & an olympic sized swimming pool. I shall be dreadfully upset if the location is not up to standard. I mean, that’s what it promised in the brochure after all.”
“Why kind Sir, it would be my pleasure! Lead the way while I follow.”
Oh dear. This is it, then?
I’d ask for death to let me make a phone call, so my animals are not locked in their barn/house, starving for days before being discovered.
Okay…I covered the critters, lets go! :-)
I’m not afraid of death, I’ve had a good, long life already, from here on out it’s just frosting on the cake.
Personally, with the gross overpopulation on earth at this time in history, I think dying by 60-ish would be a blessing to the planet.
Can I play with your scythe?
“IherebyapologiseforallmyformersinsandseekforgivenessfromAlmightyGodandhisonlysonJesusChristmylordandsavior. Alright, take me to Heaven, bitch.”
Oh, time for another grand adventure, eh?
Can we watch an episode of “Bones” before we go?
I’ve seen you on Family Guy and you are hilarious!
“What!! Where are Billy and Mandy?
You could use a little meat on your bones.
“Time for my meds, I assume.”
You look like a Dos Equis kinda guy.
I’d give him a melvin and run away.
Want to play a game of beer pong?
I’d ask if he’s really there for me and if I could at least say good bye to my kids.
Lol @Kayak8 ..I heard that, in my head, the way Marvin Gaye sings it, Let’s Get It On. Or did you actually mean it that way?
“Lead the way. I hope the bed is comfortable.”
Tap my toe impatiently, look at my watch and ask ‘where the heck have you been? you are so late!’
Warily I will say, “Oh, It’s just you, I thought it was Sarah Palin.”
What up, Skinny? Lets get on with it already….
Go ahead and take me. I guarantee you’ll regret it soon. Then I do a creepy smile. :-)
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