Adults: if you found out one or both of your parents was not your biological parent, would you seek out your bio mom or dad?

I think I’d be more curious than anything.

If they purposely lied, my reaction would depend on thier reason/intent for lying.

I did. I’d never been allowed to see a picture of my father, never told his full name or where he might be living in the country, anything about his life… except bad things. I had several sets of wonderful grandparents who tried to do just about anything to make me happy and safe but I always wanted to know who my father was, this ominous cause of my mother’s ruined life and the seed of all my bad traits and negative behaviors.

Had I been “lab grown” and raised by wonderful parents then I think I’d be curious, especially in this time of internet making the world such a small place but I don’t think I’d have any hurt, anger or missed-out-on feeling or regret.

In my opinion, a child who is adpoted or “lab grown” is wanted, planned for and chosen. I think those kids might be happier than many of us with traditional baby-forming method parents.

I’d search hem to ask what happened.
I wouldn’t judge them if they did a mistake.

Though I wouldn’t start a big relationship with them just because they were the biological parents.

@Neizvestnaya When I wrote the question I meant finding out as an adult. It seems to me you never knew your dad. You speak of the need to know, which I hear from many adopted children, or children who grew up only knowing one parent. In my scenerio, I am thinking the person has always had two parents, typical nuclear family, and as an adult something is discovered. Not that I mind you answering at all. It is actually part of what I am interested in, the difference between knowing at a young age the people raising you are not your biological parents, and discovering it much later in life.

At this point in life, no. I would pass the info on to my daughter in case she wanted to investigate.

No but it would explain a lot. ;^)

The people who raise you are your parents regardless of biology IMHO.

If someone else’s sperm and/or uterus brought you into this world it doesn’t change who “mom” and “dad” are.

So no, I wouldn’t care.

I would be curious but because I had great parents,I would not entertain fantasies of finding “better” ones. ;)

I could not care less. I know who my real parents are, even if on a biological level I was technically wrong.

Yes, I would.

I’m not sure I’d bother, but how can one say unless in the situation.

I was adopted as an infant and told about the fact when I was 7. Most folks would think that 7 is too young an age to tell a child such an earth shattering revelation. In reality, it was genius. Even though I understood on an intellectual level what they were telling me, I had no real frame of reference or life experience to form an actual opinion with. At 7, your Mommy and Daddy are your Mommy and Daddy.

I didn’t become curious until the birth of our first child when the doctor began to ask questions about my family medical history and I realized I had no idea. That, and having a horrific father who should never have been allowed to raise a child, got me to wondering about other things. Were there picture albums out there full of people that looked like me? Was my biological mother still alive (my father died before I was born)? Do my kids look like an aunt or uncle, grandpa or grandma, that they will never know? Sure, I wanted to look them up.

Long story short, it takes more money than I have to get your birth records opened. @Darwin, here on Fluther gave me all the info I needed and then some. It’s a lot of court costs, footwork, and detective work.

Maybe a Google search.

I would search.

I’m pretty sure I’d seek out my biological parent(s).

I’d be curious about who they were and what other family I had out there. I’d definitely try to find them and talk to them. I’d wonder why it was kept from me all these years and I’d definitely ask lots of questions about it.

@JLeslie: I’ve know a few people who were adopted but didn’t know it (even if others did) and when they found out as adults then they took it very hard. Most adults believe there’s not much they are not entitled to know about their origins, the ones I’ve known anyways. They took it as almost a betrayal and insult, as if they had been unnecessarily shielded from matter of fact info. Both of these people went on to find out about their biologicals though they didn’t create any deep bonds. For them, it was info they felt made “some pieces fit” and they felt some sense of relief after.

Don’t really care. As long as my foster parents love me and sustain my life when I need them I’m fine. I’ll try not to ask them even though I’m a bit curious since I’m afraid that it will cause major parents-children issue which isn’t necessary.

Sure, I’d wonder. I don’t know how much energy I’d put into locating them though.

Not sure. Depends on the situation. If that parent bailed on me….I doubt I would want to meet that person.

@Neizvestnaya I would think the fact that the parents who raised them kept this truth from them their whole life affects those feelings? I would also guess sometimes maybe if the adopted adult had a difficult childhood and did not get along well with their adoptive parents it would make someone even more resentful, or feel the need to know their bioloigcal parents. I don’t know, tis is just hypothesizing on my part not an firmly held opinion of mine or anything.

In my case there is a running joke in my family that my sister tries to throw at me all of the time because I was born from artifical insemination and she looks so much like my dad, and me very little, so she tells me I am the doctors baby. I actually do have some body features just like him, and she will just say tons of people have those feature. One day she asked me what would I really do if it were true my dad is not my bio dad, and I am pretty sure I would do nothing. But, that is not my parents lying to me my whole life.

I think if I was adopted as a child, and knew my whole life I was adopted, I would wonder also. I would want to know my bio parents. Can’t be sure though, hard to know what my 10 year old mind would be thinking, and then later that mind nto adulthood. If I found out I was adopted now, I think I would be curious to the circumstance maybe? Not sure. I really am not sure.

If, by some chance, I found out that the man I grew up believing is my father is not my father, I would want to know who my “real” father is. I probably would seek him out. I would consider myself a part of him. That being said, I would still view the man I grew up calling my Dad as my “Dad” because he has been there through so much and has been a great father to my siblings and me in many ways.