Social Question

erichw1504's avatar

If women belong in the kitchen, then men belong where?

Asked by erichw1504 (26329 points ) July 14th, 2011

I’m sure you’ve heard at least one joke about women in the kitchen. So, let’s look at the flip-side of this. If men were stereotyped into being in one place, where would it be and why? The place doesn’t even have to be in a house, it could be at a store, event, anywhere.

Bonus points for making a joke out of it!

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86 Answers

Jude's avatar

On a leash.

john65pennington's avatar

Lowering the commode seat so his sweety will never again…....fall in!

SpatzieLover's avatar

Mowing the lawn.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Taking out the trash.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Cleaning their litter boxes is this the right question? ;P

YoBob's avatar

The garage/workshop, of course.

~

Yes, I know that you women out there would like to think that the ability to whip up a decent broccoli rice casserole is the corner stone of the family unit and that your husbands should erect a shrine to you in appreciation for doing so once and awhile. But let us not forget who takes care of general auto maintenance, changes the light bulbs, fixes the lawnmower, cleans the gutters, unstops the drains, deals with pest control, paints the house, fixes the fence, re-arranges the furniture at your whim, etc…, etc…

\~

Actually, I don’t buy into the whole gender role stereotype in successful relationships. I happen to be a fabulous cook (as is my wife), and she is quite capable of taking care of pretty much any home maintenance task that comes her way (although I remain the king of being able to field strip a “lawn chief” and put it back in working order)

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

On their knees.:)

SpatzieLover's avatar

@YoBob I don’t fall into a stereotypical role at all..I’m the fixer/gardener. He prefers to do laundry & empty the dishwasher & vacuum…Thank goodness!

YoBob's avatar

@john65pennington – Regarding toilet seats, I believe we have the best and most equitable solution around our house. After use, both of us put down both lids. It generally makes the bathroom look nicer with the lid completely closed and the dogs won’t be tempted to use them as an auxiliary water bowl. Further, no matter your gender or whether you sit or stand, the action to prepare to use and restore the seat to the fully closed position is the same.

SpatzieLover's avatar

@YoBob again, so do we. Actually flushing with the lid up grosss us out

ucme's avatar

Up a ladder

YoBob's avatar

@SpatzieLover Sounds like y’all have a great thing going!

SpatzieLover's avatar

In the recliner.

LuckyGuy's avatar

Outside, cutting the grass and giving the car an oil change.

janbb's avatar

In the kitchen, cooking with their partners.

Russell_D_SpacePoet's avatar

Been my experience with many women that they shouldn’t be anywhere near a kitchen. :) That was ok. I can cook.

YoBob's avatar

@lucillelucillelucille

RE: “On their knees.”

I quite agree, assuming of course that their wives are on all fours directly in front of them… ;)

Jude's avatar

The the sperm donor clinic.

I’ll come with turkey baster in tow.

YoBob's avatar

@Jude – It’s more fun the old fashioned way… ;)

Jude's avatar

…with your Mama..

SpatzieLover's avatar

Tied to the bed.

Cruiser's avatar

Making margaritas for when the woman is done with her kitchen duty!

tinyfaery's avatar

What man?

everephebe's avatar

Men belong in the kitchen too.
Everyone should cook together, naked.

KateTheGreat's avatar

Locked in the closet with the others ;)

incendiary_dan's avatar

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY KITCHEN!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

In the bathroom. On all fours. Scrubbing the floor with a toothbrush until all pee spots are gone and that fucking floor SHINES!

aprilsimnel's avatar

Depends on the man. AHEM! ;)

SpatzieLover's avatar

At the grill making us dinner. I’m just in the kitchen to feed the pets.

MRSHINYSHOES's avatar

In a state of continuous orgasmic ecstasy.

@erichw1504 Did you hear this one? “Women who play with fire usually end up cooking over it.” Love gearing that one towards whining manhaters and extreme feminists. Lol.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Chauferring the kids.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

In the toilet!

FluffyChicken's avatar

six feet under.

oh, am I bitter? maybe just a bit…

erichw1504's avatar

@MRSHINYSHOES Why are women’s feet smaller than men’s? So they can stand closer to the sink.

SpatzieLover's avatar

Getting me a coffee.

Hibernate's avatar

Providing for the family [the source of income].

Jude's avatar

on Uranus.

FutureMemory's avatar

In the kitchen helping, so we can cuddle that much sooner post chores :)

Jude's avatar

^^ how about cuddling whilst cooking?

SpatzieLover's avatar

how about utilizing the kitchen table or counter in a more wink, wink, nudge, nudge manner?

rebbel's avatar

Mars.

FutureMemory's avatar

I’ll cuddle in the kitchen with you, @Jude :)~

mrrich724's avatar

Women belong in the kitchen if you want food. Men belong in the kitchen if you want gourmet food!

I don’t understand . . . the best chefs in the world were men. I worked for a 5 Star 5 Diamond hotel with the same rated restaurant outlets in it, all the chefs were men.

OK, I’ll play the game. If women belong in the kitchen, men belong at work. . . sorry, I guess that one wasn’t that funny :(

cockswain's avatar

In the voting booth.

dappled_leaves's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate, I read your post three times before I realized that you were talking about pee stains on your bathroom floor and not the kitchen… I am much relieved.

creative1's avatar

Taking out the trash

mrrich724's avatar

@cockswain +10000 that was good.

josie's avatar

On the battlefield

WestRiverrat's avatar

Calling the cops to get that DAMNED woman out of MY kitchen…even if I do most of the cooking outside in the fire ring.

I don’t even want her doing my dishes. I’ll just have to redo them later…

roundsquare's avatar

In front of the TV.

cletrans2col's avatar

The boardroom.

filmfann's avatar

In the arena, facing the Bulls!

Pandora's avatar

Well the full comment always went, that women belong, in the kitchen bear foot and pregnant.
So if thats the case then the men should be in the kitchen, cooking her favorite meal and giving her a foot massage after she has eaten. Its not like his body is going through any changes for the next 9 months.
She probably would be barefooted because her swollen feet won’t fit into any shoes. So its the least he can do.

augustlan's avatar

In my belly.

aprilsimnel's avatar

@Pandora – I think in that case, he’s already done the least he can do. The meal prep and foot massage are a few steps up!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@dappled_leaves Well, I did say “in the bathroom, on the floor”, lol. If that sort of thing were to occur in the kitchen, I’d be a single mom. =0)

Symbeline's avatar

In the woods, cutting down trees I guess. But I’d rather do that part. Any man who marries me will come to fear my horrendous cooking.
I went out with a guy who cooked really well, and wouldn’t stop pestering me about eating better, and always cooked things for me, because he didn’t trust me to eat good on my own. It’s awesome when people care for you, no matter their ’‘roles’’.

So yeah, cutting down trees. I’ll stay in the kitchen and practice my axe skills on wild pigs that dare to bust in through the back door. My husband can cook its ass later. XD

incendiary_dan's avatar

Mmm, wild pig ass.

That might have come out wrong.

erichw1504's avatar

Wild pig ass makes for some wild bacon.

YoBob's avatar

It has been my experience that while wild pig ass is wonderful, especially when turned to ham by curing and smoking, the loin is much better.

That being said, it is hard to beat an 80 pound wild piglet smoked whole!

Symbeline's avatar

I don’t know why, but lately everything reminds me of Castlevania. I wonder if war hog ass tastes good. Although if that busted through my kitchen, it might eat me…

SpatzieLover's avatar

Slaying the zombies.

roundsquare's avatar

@SpatzieLover So that the woman can cook it for dinner?

Symbeline's avatar

@SpatzieLover Wives should be able to do it too…I mean, maybe the man is out swinging an axe all day, but I’m dicing up war pigs here! I can kill zombies.

SpatzieLover's avatar

@Symbeline I agree. Most likely I’d have to skin the damn thing anyway. I know he’s not doing it. If I’m in the kitchen, I’m most likely doing plumbing or something or other.

Symbeline's avatar

That reminds me of this one time, where the plumber came over here to fix my kitchen sink, cuz it was all regurgitating water and shit. I invited my friend over. We started jumping up and down on my bed and laughing like mad. The plumber walked by to get stuff in or out of his truck, I forgot…and we heard him mutter under his breath as he was passing by; fuckin’ lesbos. (but in French)

It was pretty epic. :D

SpatzieLover's avatar

@Symbeline Thank you for the chuckle!

Symbeline's avatar

@SpatzieLover I swear, it’s a totally true story lol.

SpatzieLover's avatar

@Symbeline I’m certain it is and it’s funny shit!
I’ve had very “typical” plumbers come to do repairs. I swear to God they could’ve walked right out of a sit-com they were so “into” the plumbing character. Plumber’s crack is 4rl

Symbeline's avatar

I know. They all have buttcracks showing. I used tot think that was a joke, but it’s true…I happened upon his buttcrack more than once while going over to the kitchen.

Jude's avatar

on his knees.

augustlan's avatar

My plumber is pretty cute. Just sayin’.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@SpatzieLover and @Symbeline HEY! My hubby owns a plumbing company, and not only is he drop dead gorgeous, but he shows absolutely NO crack!!! :P

SpatzieLover's avatar

Sounds like you and @augustlan found the 2 good ones in the Universe ;P The ones I know need some spandex added to their jeans…or to loose a bit o’ the belly

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Speaking of crack…..... It’s Boob Wednesday, dangit! I want boobatars!

erichw1504's avatar

I’m a fan of Boob Wednesdays and boobatars.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

Under the sink mucking up the garbage disposal.

On the roof in golf shoes.

In the yard butchering the hedges.

AnonymousWoman's avatar

The yard (if he has one) or fixing things around the house (if he lives in one) whenever the situation calls for it. A man should know how to take care of “his castle” and do his part in helping to make sure it’s an awesome place to live. He should also get to relax and feel appreciated for all the hard work he does! :)

Charles's avatar

Over the fence, at the neighbor lady’s house

LittleLemon's avatar

In diapers.

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