Social Question

dogkittycat's avatar

Should I stay or should I go?

Asked by dogkittycat (880 points ) July 14th, 2011 from iPhone

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half. We simply love eachother and spending time together. 3 months ago he started working at Just Tires as a mechanic. He’s the youngest there, works from open till close 6/7 days a week. This has made it so hard to see eachother anymore, he lives 5minutes away and yet I haven’t seen him in a month. Yesterday, (his day off) he gets called in and cancels on me. I asked him why he didn’t say no, a reasonable question I thought anyway. He blew up at me, saying I didn’t trust him No variation of those words has ever been said. Guilty conscious?? He blew up at me so much I cried my eyes out, the only thing I could think of to say was sorry. Tonight we had sex, went and got ice-cream since it was too late for dinner all within 1.5hrs. He then rushed me home because he had to run something to a friend 30minutes away. By the way we have an 11pm curfew, his father is very strict (can’t wait till he moves out). Needless to say I don’t know where this is going, I love him but I also don’t want to be stuck in a relationship where he has no time for me. Any advice, tips, similar situations and what you did would be appreciated.

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17 Answers

Schroedes13's avatar

I think you just need to have a sit down with him and talk about how you feel!

bob_'s avatar

Drop him like a bad habit.

He “has to run something to a friend”? That’s a deal-breaker.

Bellatrix's avatar

There could be something going on but it could be he is stressed about something else too. As @Schroedes13 said, time for a talk about where things are. Perhaps he is having problems at work though. Perhaps his boss is giving him grief and then you chimed in and got angry with him because he had to go to work. The only way to be sure, is to have an honest talk with him.

ANef_is_Enuf's avatar

Something is weird about this. If I have been dating someone for a year and a half, and then I don’t see them for a month… I pretty much assume I’ve been tactlessly dumped. You definitely need to have an ‘all out on the table’ talk. I think if I were in your situation, I would leave. Honestly.

WestRiverrat's avatar

How old is he?

ucme's avatar

Your personalities seem to clash….go, or there may be trouble!

athenasgriffin's avatar

I wouldn’t consider myself friends with a person if they wouldn’t see me for a month. If he cares about you, he will make time for you, despite any sort of problems. This seems like a case of He’s Just Not That Into You. I dated a guy with two part time jobs and college, and he still managed to make time for me. On the other hand, I had this relationship with a guy who used his Xbox 360 as an excuse not to see me. Guess which one was a keeper?

Hibernate's avatar

Isn’t it obvious? He wants a carer. You were there for him all the time so he takes advantage of you staying with him no matter what.

You should talk with him before leaving to at least explain what’s what.

marinelife's avatar

A month? That does not seem right.

You need to talk to him about his future plans. Tell him that if this continues, the relationship won’t because you never see him.

chyna's avatar

If he can’t find a few minutes a week to be with you, you need to move on. He’s trying to dump you without actually doing the deed.

john65pennington's avatar

Schrodes, I totally agree with your answer. They appear to have lost communication with each other.

Aethelflaed's avatar

I think the real question is: If you go, will there be trouble? And if you stay, will it be double?

Only138's avatar

@ucme NICE!!!!!!! I love the Clash. :)

ucme's avatar

@Only138 Yup, although I prefer The Stranglers myself…......never a frown ;¬}

Bellatrix's avatar

‘with golden brown’ ... or .. ‘walking on the beaches looking at the peaches’ may be what this guy is up to.

dogkittycat's avatar

@westriverrat- He’s 20 going on 21 in October.

dogkittycat's avatar

Thanks, still doesn’t make it easier he still texts me everyday and tells me he loves me and doesn’t want me to go. =\

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