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Dutchess_III's avatar

Referring specifically to restaurants and manners, do you have different sets of expectations of your kids and their manners depending on what kind of restaurant you go to?

Asked by Dutchess_III (28254 points ) July 21st, 2011

For example, do you allow them to be less well behaved at McDonald’s than, say, Red Lobster? This, of course, is a sequel to this question about a restaurant banning kids 6 and under.

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9 Answers

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Same expectation, no matter the restaurant. No screaming or wailing and you say excuse me if you have to pass by someone. Actually, that’s the expectation anywhere, not just restaurants.

Bellatrix's avatar

No. I don’t care where we are eating, they should use decent table manners and be considerate of other people around them. I would expect the same at home!

We don’t normally go to fast food restaurants but my son really wanted to go to Pizza Hut a few years ago and we took him. I was appalled at the many children literally running around the restaurant on sugar highs, while their parents just sat and ignored the fact that their children were bumping into people at other tables, were shouting and carrying on. It made the whole experience very unpleasant. Last time we went there or to any food outlet of that type.

Going to more expensive restaurants doesn’t guarantee people will supervise their children by any means, it just reduced the chance of there being quite so many badly behaved children.

atomicmonkey's avatar

I don’t let my kids run riot anywhere. I understand that toddlers have their moments and throw tantrums sometimes and there’s not a whole lot a parent can do in that situation, (other than remove said Hellchild from the room until they calm down.)

In regards to talking loudly, I’d be more lenient in a noisy kid’s restaurant. They’re kids, they’re excited. If it’s noisy generally, I’m not too fussed about my kids adding to it. They’re probably just vibing off the energy in the room, or trying to be heard above the noise.

Running around like maniacs though? No.

Seaofclouds's avatar

Same expectations anywhere we are at. Whether it’s at home, at a family member’s house, at McDonald’s, or some fancy restaurant, it doesn’t matter.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Posting this question brought a memory to mind. My shy daughter was 6, my gregarious son was 4. We were at McD’s. My daughter wanted more fries (please.) I dug out a dollar and said, “Go up to the counter and order some.” She couldn’t get up the nerve to to do it. My son said, ”I’ll do it!” So I gave him the dollar, he marched up to the counter, which his head barely cleared…and waited. And waited. After he was passed over twice by the counter guys waiting on tall people who came AFTER him, and just as I was just starting to go to his rescue, he said, “Hey! Hey! MISTER! Down here! I’d like some more french fries please! I have money!” and he put the bill on the counter. They looked around and I caught their eye and nodded. They grinned and they finally got him the fries.
“Thank you!” he said and marched back to the table. I’ll never forget that “Hey…down here!” : ) : )
He came back to the booth in a huff and said, “Nobody even saw me! They kept waiting on everybody else! I finally had to TALK LOUD!!!”

Keeping on topic…In a Red Lobster, I wouldn’t allow one of my little kids to get up out of their seat without me for any reason. But I allowed (actually, I suggested…) that my little one go order more food at the counter at McDonalds all by himself (well, it started out with her, the 6 year old, but turned into him, the 4 year old!) I guess that’s as far as different expectations went.

Bellatrix's avatar

That is so cute. And such a great lesson for both of you. Sounds like he will do fine.

Kardamom's avatar

I’m afraid that my nephew is allowed to run amok in McDonalds and his parents never take him to other restaurants because he is known to throw tantrums. I think it is a shame because he is not learning how to act correctly in restaurants. He’s now 5 years old and should not be allowed to throw tantrums. When I have baby sat for him and he has started to throw a tantrum, I put a stop to it immediately by getting down to his level (ala Jo Frost from Supernanny) and firmly explaining to him what he has done wrong, why he needs to stop, how his bad behavior if going to negatively hurt mommy and daddy, and what he can expect from me if he doesn’t stop. Unfortunately, I seem to be the only one who interacts with him that employs this tactic. So far, it’s worked ever time for me, but no one else is willing to scold him or stop him because it’s not fun (because you do have to put up with the screams until they learn to control themselves, but if they were taught earlier, then this wouldn’t even be a problem).

If it was me taking him to the restaurant, whether it be McD’s or any place else, I would tell him exactly how I expected him to behave inside the restaurant (quiet, no running around, no getting up without permission, using common table manners, not complaining) and if he didn’t comply, then we would leave, immediately. I am not the popular aunt.

filmfann's avatar

My 5 year old grandson’s behavior might be acceptable in a pizza parlor, but we are having someone stay with him while the rest of my family have dinner at Club 33 this October.
That is far too exclusive a place to put up with his occasional attitude, and he wouldn’t appreciate it anyway.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Why....@Kardamom..you are right. Parents seem to be afraid of their kids now.

@filmfann Exactly….“he wouldn’t appreciate it anyway.”

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