Social Question

BabyLingua's avatar

How do you deal with it when your best friend stops talking to you?

Asked by BabyLingua (28 points ) July 24th, 2011

I had a friend who moved away a few years ago. When my mom and his mom talk on the phone, he doesn’t want to talk to me anymore.

I know I can’t do much about it, but how did you deal with it when your best friends stopped being interested in you?

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12 Answers

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

I be their best friend and let them have their time away from me, on their terms, not mine.

And then I make some new friends.

QueenOfNowhere's avatar

Maybe he wants to be alone for a bit. I sometimes do that to my good friend because she is always bugging me about tv shows and forces me to watch all of them when I have tons of work to do lol… But that doesn’t mean I don’t love him..

ddude1116's avatar

I had a friend, my best friend and neighbor, who moved to Texas when I was in fifth grade. We attempted to maintain connection to each other, talking on the phone a lot at first, but we just stopped talking because it became too much of a nuisance. I think both of us realized that the past was passed and that we were fooling ourselves in the masochistic fantasy that two young boys could maintain a friendship based very much on mischief over the telephone. All that was to be dealt with, we dealt with mutually, though. We lead our own lives, and saw new friends. Sure, the effort was greater, having to leave my street and all, but I got closer to my friends from school as a result. Looking back, I miss those days, especially the mischief, but continuing to talk and just growing increasingly bored of each other took the luster of our friendship away, revealing the dull structure beneath the chrome and realizing it wasn’t well made.

Hibernate's avatar

As for me, this never happened. If he’s my best friend he at least say he wants to be alone or wants the space or something like this.
But even if this occurs I go straight to the topic and ask what’s up with this. He’s either a friend and explains or keeps silent and pointing out he’s not a friend. A true friend points out what you do wrong and points out you offended them in some way.
No communication means lack of interest for the friendship.

my 2 cents.

chewhorse's avatar

Do as most do.. Recall the good memories.. Find new friends.

john65pennington's avatar

Mail him a “I Miss You” card in the regular mail and delivered by the postal service.

This should be an eye-opener for him to contact you.

marinelife's avatar

It hurts. You could try writing him a letter telling him how you feel, but be prepared to let go.

beckk's avatar

My best friend stopped talking to me last summer. It sucked and I didn’t understand why, I still don’t. But, the best thing for you would to do is let them go. It’s not the easiest thing to do, but it’s the best. You will move on and make new friends, it could take time, but it’s worth it.
If your friend decideds he wants to talk to you again, great. As long as that’s what you want.
Don’t waste your time on someone who doesn’t want to be part of your life.

JLeslie's avatar

Start making new best friends is my best advice.

Blueroses's avatar

I know how painful it is. I’ve had many friendships dissolve because of moves. You can be very close to somebody when you’re sharing common things in your daily life, but after a time goes by, you don’t know any of their new friends and they don’t know yours. Your interests and activities have changed and you’re going down different paths. It becomes increasingly difficult to find things to talk about because you don’t have any points of reference any more except for the past.

It doesn’t mean he didn’t value your friendship too. Like others said, keep the good memories and try to let go of the hurt.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Doesn’t sound like a best friend, to me.

cookieman's avatar

I handled it poorly. I was depressed about it for years – mostly because there was no good explanation (that I knew of). What’s worse, is he didn’t move away – he’s still minutes away. Just not interested.

I tried letters, cards, eMail. All were either ignored of fluffed off with a thin excuse.

Eventually ya just have to let go and make new friends. Don’t waste as much time on it as I have.

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