When does showing pride in an accomplishment become bragging?

I see it as ‘bragging’ or hot air when it’s brought up without context or relevance.
If someone explains why they’re over the moon and happy, or highlights their achievement in response to a question or as relevant experience in an interview – it’s perfectly OK.

Citing specific examples of something you accomplished shows pride: e.g., “I have increased our recruitment of study participants by 50%!”

Using superlatives to describe your performance is bragging: e.g., “I’m really really good at my job.”

both very good points.

Everyone has a different line (and a fine one at that), we just have to read it as best we can.

It depends on so many things. I agree a lot hinges on how and when you say something but the perception of the listener is a factor as well. A simple statement of fact made with true humility could still be misheard as bragging.

Check out the obituary of one of the modest men I have ever known. He was a path-breaker in cancer research and famous thru-out the scientific world. His accomplishments spoke for themselves. He was a gentle and self-effacing guy.

Dr. Judah Folkman: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/16/us/16folkman.html?ref=health

When people start avoiding you, you are probably bragging too much:) But seriously. I think it is a question of fine-tuning your awareness to the reaction of those around you; also, one iteration of an accomplishment is probably pride, several reiterations are probably bragging. (Unless you’re talking to your mother, to whom it’s o.k. to brag.)

@ gailcalled – Thanks! It seems that if you focus on the tasks they speak for themselves.

@ janbb – Very true. I have noticed that. Although, it can be excitement. Usually you can sense the disbelief in their voice rather than the bragging.

if you are trying to make others envious then it’s not coming from a good place and you’re probably bragging.

It ain’t “Bragging” if you can do it…..

we all brag sometimes

As long as you’re not being an ass about it, then you’re probably not bragging. Also it depends on the person you’re talking to; simply stating your position/profession to certain people can seem like bragging to them because they’re not happy with their careers (or lack thereof). So it goes both ways.

I’ve also found that there are some people who see others stating something they accomplished as an introduction to them telling about what they did. That bugs me to know end.

Ah, yes; the people who don’t listen and wait for a pause in order to leap in and talk about themselves (Egotists.)). Similar to the guys at cocktail parties whose eyes roam around the room as they wait for an opportunity to find more famous people(Narcissists.)

Those who accomplish things don’t have to crow; the world finds out.

(But calling your mom is completely different and actually necessary – for the mom’s sake.) From Haikus for Jews:

Beyond Valium,
the peace of knowing one’s child
is an internist.

Or: (Shivah is the week just after a death in the family, when visitors come to the house and pay their respects.)

The shivah visit:
so sorry about your loss.
Now back to my problems.

@ gailcalled – wit or wisdom, why not both! Great posts!

You know, when I think about it, I think ‘tolerance for bragging’ (if you can call it that) varies from one culture to another. I just remembered this delightful etiquette that’s very much part of Danish culture (doesn’t mean they all live by it though….): Jante Law

@wildflower; I love Jante Law. Words to live by.

@ gailcalled
It’s a good way to stay grounded and humble alright…...The downside is it can hinder people’s ambitions, when it comes to interviews, resume writing and other types of self-promoting.

@ wildflower; I have never seen that. Very interesting. Very good to temper ones ambitions with though.

this is quite subjective. I’d say when you start wondering if you’re bragging or not you probably are. I think the intention matters too though. For instance if you’re doing it in good faith, even if it’s ott it can be forgiven. Usually you can tell by other people’s faces too.