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YoBob's avatar

Are you ready for the zombie apocalypse?

Asked by YoBob (12846points) September 29th, 2011

The CDC (IMHO) hit an out of the park home run with their Zombie Apocalypse emergency preparedness campaign.

I will be talking to a group of cub scouts this weekend about emergency preparedness and plan to task them each with assembling a zombie apocalypse kit.

Are you prepared for the zombie apocalypse? If so, what is in your kit and why did you choose that item?

NOTE: For those a bit slow on the uptake this is about real emergency preparedness and not a fantasy zombie invasion. I’m only interested in the real and practical survival items in your kit.

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25 Answers

Blackberry's avatar

NOTE: For those a bit slow on the uptake this is about real emergency preparedness and not a fantasy zombie invasion. I’m only interested in the real and practical survival items in your kit

Whew!

I always told myself I would create a survival pack, but I never got around to it. It would be packed with water, and also that brita water bottle, and as many granola and cliff bars I could fit in it. A swiss army knife, and some matches/lighter. And maybe even a gun.

wundayatta's avatar

Yeah. I have water in the basement. Oodles of it. Canned food. Flashlights. Multiple sources of fuel available. We keep the car gassed up when it looks like any serious situation is approaching. We have tools. Blankets. We live in an urban area where people are willing to help each other out.

So that’s all the stupid serious stuff. Why didn’t you put this in general if you wanted serious answers?

The truth is that I made friends with Symboline, and the moment something happens, I’m flying up to Canada, renting a house, and if she won’t move in voluntarily, I’ll hire her to protect me and my family from the ravening hordes. I’ll bribe pay her with an unlimited supply of zombie movies to keep her motivated. Hell, I’ll pay her enough to hire and train a crack team of zombie killers (or whatever you need to fight zombies). You know how it is. When you have a problem, call in the expert!

JilltheTooth's avatar

I have Fiddle Playing Creole Bastard in my kit. He has promised to protect me. I need nothing else.

YoBob's avatar

@wundayatta – True, it probably should be under General. OTOH, some of the best practical ideas come from a more relaxed treatment of the topic at hand.

poisonedantidote's avatar

It occurs to me that no matter how well prepare I am, I would not be prepared enough. The scale of the problem would be so large, that having a few things around the house would not help much, you would literally need to become an independent state. With this in mind, I propose a plan that uses minor preparation, and concentrates on post event actions more.

The plan is divided in to several stages: Preparation, aquisition, execution and maintenance.

The first thing you will need is a basic kit. This kit consists of…

- 1 gallon of gass
– 1 vehicle
– 1 handgun
– 1 long range riffle
– 1 katana sword
– A set of basic tools, such as bold cutters, a crow bar and other basic tools.

When the invasion hits, you will want to use this kit to seek out an area you can cordon off and secure. In the aquisition part of the plan you would go out and seek out useful things, such as military grade barbed wire, rope, reservoirs for gas and water, amunition, food, and anything else you could need.

The execution part of the plan would be to cordon off an entire independent area that you can keep zombie free. You surround the place with barbed wire, incendiary devices, and control it from the middle with your riffles and machine guns.

The maintenance part of the plan would be to do all the things you need to do to keep things in place. e.g. replacing incendiary devices that are used, getting more ammo, and so on.

Ideally… you want a farm land house, with no trees or other buildings near by. You would need to dig a 3 meter deep trench all around the house, about 600 meters in diameter with the house at the middle. You would want to fill it ideally with lime and water, or acid, or spikes, and other such things. The next barrier would be a barbed wire infested minefield of sorts, that ends at a tripple layered chain link fence that goes well in to the ground as well as above it. A tower or look out spot would also be ideal.

erichw1504's avatar

You forgot to add “Part 23” to the title of your question.

Blackberry's avatar

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard Hahahahah! Fucking christ, man….....

TexasDude's avatar

@Blackberry I hear Christ was a zombie at one point.

YoBob's avatar

@poisonedantidote – YIKES! You seem to be way heavy on the defense aspect, and perhaps that is prudent. On the other hand, it’s probably a good idea to be prepared to defend oneself from the abundance of nutcases that are sure to be running around after ZA day.

I think you are quite right about not being prepared enough no matter how prepared you are.

I believe in multiple levels of “kits”:

There is the “threat is rapidly advancing your way so grab your stuff and get the heck out” kit. This is the basic backpack with immediate needs that you can yank out of a closet and throw on your back at a moments notice.

Then there is the “We have a situation brewing so you might want to get ready to evacuate” kit. This is the longer term items that can be kept in footlockers that you can dig out of the shed and throw in the back of the truck just in case you get the word you need to leave.

Then there is the full blown “Zombie Apocylipse Defcon 1” kit that there is really no way to prepare for, but should include a pre-stocked chunk of defensible retreat property along with a plan for long term self-sustainability.

YoBob's avatar

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard – Excellent! (how do you plan to carry your armory when you have to get the heck out of dodge?)

As I understand it, the rapture involves people rising from the dead to collect their ultimate reward before the earth is destroyed. Sounds pretty much like a zombie apocalypse to me!

TexasDude's avatar

@YoBob in the event of a zombie attack that required me to bug out, rather than bug in, I would carry my AR and my .45 and I would disperse the rest of my more effective firearms to my friends/party.

King_Pariah's avatar

Crow bar, knives (okay so two bayonets you could say and a knife… might bring my Persian Damascus steel one too…), water, jerky, good pair of boots, changes of socks, a good rucksack, hatchet, and if the rest of family was gone for some reason, take my dad’s hunting rifle and katana and take a little visit to pick up an AR, more ammo, an e tool, and maybe a machete. Oh yeah, and go on an old spice raid.

ucme's avatar

Yes I am, I have a shit ton of tissues to cry into. Thousands of “adult diapers” to crap into & a valid passport that gets me to Easter Island, bloody quick like. I’m good & ready, don’t you fret!

ddude1116's avatar

I have a map of my city on my wall with notable locations marked and various routes to those locations marked as well.

YoBob's avatar

I believe every basic kit should include:

(In a backpack or easily carry-able bag)

change of clothes
basic first aid kit (bandages, gauze, disinfectant, pain killer, burn cream, etc…)
Water bottles that can be quickly filled on your way out the door
water filter straws (the kind backpackers uses)
non-perishable lightweight food items (jerky, trail mix, freeze dried backpacking food)
para-cord or other strong cordage
“magneto” type flash light (doesn’t require batteries)
radio – also preferablly one that can be charged via a hand crank.
Swiss army knife
Fishing line and a couple of hooks
tarp/tent
rain poncho
medium weight sleeping bag
signal mirror
pencil/paper
small mess kit/utensils
cup
matches/lighter

YoBob's avatar

Ooops…. almost forgot one of the most important items:

Duct Tape!

King_Pariah's avatar

I forgot to put condoms…

YARNLADY's avatar

I’m going to be one of the zombies, so I don’t have to worry about the survival kit.

HungryGuy's avatar

Why is the one person I’d expect to have a thorough detailed answer to this question not even answering?

Berserker's avatar

If an actual zombie outbreak were to occur, my plan would be to hit the sticks. I wouldn’t stay in a highly populated area.
I would need a vehicle, something sturdy and that can withstand more than city streets. Something like a four wheel drive, maybe an army truck, if I could get my hands on that. A closed jeep might be good. It needs to have room and power. I’d also like something that doesn’t have too many windows.

I’d bring along supplies like canned food, or other stuff that takes a while to go bad. Raid a store if I get a chance. I won’t be picky. Things like beans, granola bars, anything that lasts a while. Of course, I would take things like meat and veggies. I’d make sure to eat those first. Plenty of water too.

Basic medical supplies. Bandages of all sizes, peroxide, rubbing alcohol, cold and hot packs. Anything to treat small and large cuts, as well as bruises. Hopefully I don’t break anything. I’d also bring what I can for fevers and colds. Also, a toothbrush and toothpaste. The last thing you want during a zombie invasion is a cavity that kicks your ass constantly.

A rope. I don’t know why, but always bring a rope. A lighter. Several of them. A good, sturdy knife. A hammer and a fireman’s axe. These tools would be used for plenty of purposes, such as breaking into places, and substituting them for things I don’t have but would probbaly need. (both in my escape and living in the woods)

I would also bring plenty of extra gasoline for my ride.

Of course, I’d need weapons. Firearms would be best, although I’ve never used any before. Given the scenario, I think I could learn fast enough, hopefully without blowing my foot off or something. I’d need something highly destructive, like a sawed off shotgun or a machine gun. Learning to aim for the head might take a long time, and a long time I probably wouldn’t have. (but I would still bring a few handguns and riffles anyways) Blowing zombies to chunks or riddling them in half might not always kill them, but it would greatly halt their advance on me as I moved on. But this would be used sparingly, as I can’t lug around crates of ammo with me.
And the obligatory melee weapon.
Preferably something blunt, like a crowbar or metal pipe. (preferably something with a rubber grip) A machete or something like that is stylish, but in reality, you might find yourself quite fucked trying to yank out your blade from a zombie’s skull while a whole pack is swarming you.

Explosives might be a good idea. Dynamite, molotov cocktails. These would come in quite handy when needing to clear out a way forward, or messing up a huge pack of zombies behind you, especially in the city, where I’d have to maneuver my vehicle slowly and carefully in lots of places. Extra caution when using explosives would, obviously, need to be taken.
Having a working radio of some kind would be useful, in order to keep up with the events, if indeed, there’s people still covering it. But that’s optional. I’m basing this scenario on the idea that all is, definitely, fucked.

This is all stuff for the trip. In a given zombie scenario, I find that barricading yourself and trying to survive can be highly hazardous to your life. This is survival. No matter how good my defenses are, things will eventually run out, and the dead shall have my ass. My only hope to survive is to escape. Too many zombies.

When I find a place in deep nature, my next step would be to learn how to live off the land. Hopefully I can learn quickly. My vehicle would serve as shelter at first, and I’d maintain it as long as I could with what I have. Everything I brought for my trip would also be used in any way it could. My handguns and riffles would be good in starting out to get food. I’d have to be 100% sure to find a place where I know no zombies will show up, or at least very little. I suppose I could live the rest of my life in the Carpathians or something.

Sorry Wundy. XD But you can come with me. In fact, if this did happen, I’d team up with a few people to make things easier. But only people I know I can trust, and only a handful. Too large a group would greatly slow us down. However, while starting a new life in some forest, it would probably be ideal to have a large group. (considering people wouldn’t go crazy or pull off some classic zombie movie cliché where they become more dangerous than any zombie) Increase the chances of survival, as well as expending the spectrum of skills all the people could have and put to good use.

wundayatta's avatar

@Symbeline You’re the expert. I’m taking your advice here. Makes a lot of sense. I like nature, too.

Berserker's avatar

@wundayatta If I had access to a chopper, I’d go to some remote island. But that’s one of those things that happens in zombie movies that probably wouldn’t happen for real, at least for most people that can’t operate one or who don’t know someone who does.

I don’t know yet, but I’m pretty sure I just ripped off some trope. XD

Earthgirl's avatar

Lots of good answers! I only know that the most essential thing is clean water so I would have to have a portable water purifier. This one is battery free and hand cranked.
http://www.steripen.com/sidewinder

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