What type of group or program would you suggest to an alcoholic?

Group therapy usually happens either within inpatient or outpatient rehab clinics or as a suggestion provided by AA.

You can check with your local AA center and ask for the proper channels.

I think they do have random unrelated group meetings but I wouldn’t know how to find one off hand. They are probably very specified and unique to region and geography as all states don’t have these resources available for free, and those that are paid for, are usually like I said through another channel on the opposite end or in the middle of a rehab program.

Sometimes AA doesn’t help that much unless a person wants to be helped. And even then that person can slip back to drinking .. this issue needs time to be solved.

Almost any church in your area will have information on AA or other programs. Probably a google search will also give you some leads. And HawaiiJake is probably the best resource on Fluther. You’re in luck.

In case you are not familiar with AA it means alcoholics anonymous. My only warning about AA is people in it tend to think similarly, and so then if you also make dpfriends in there you are surrounded by peope who think like alcoholics. Great wait to get support, but neceessarily to change your thinking. I think alcoholics have to accept there is a problem with their coping mechanisms or how they view life, they need to reframe their world. I think AA can sometimes accomplish it, but usually people need some therapy also, ortobe open to those who don’t abuse substances in their life, open to how they look at things and handle challenges.

And, I find many alcoholics have a tremendous amount of shame, if that is your case, let go of it. Jus let it go. We all make mistakes, everyone. Make new friends creat a new life, they don’t know your past, they will judge you for what you are today. And, your family will likely let go of the past also.

@JLeslie : Was that your experience with AA?

Call the local AA number in the phone book or google AA and your city. AA groups are everywhere, sometimes in surprising places (like Yosemite Valley).

As AA says, the only requirement for membership is the desire to stop drinking. A.A. is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution. There are no dues or fees.

What I have found over the years is that if one wants to stop drinking, give some meetings a chance, find ones you like and stay with them. And don’t drink between meetings.

The one thing about recover from alcoholism is that the alcoholic needs to want to stop drinking; going to get someone to leave them alone doesn’t work for long term sobriety. But at least exposing someone to the program may plant a seed so they know where to turn when they finally give up.

A.A. is the original 12 -step program. From it sprang all sorts of other cessation movements. Check out the web site, and there is a link on the right of the home page that will help you find a meeting anywhere in the world. The meetings are completely free. You can go to as many as you like and as few as you like.

I’m a recovered alcoholic. I haven’t had a drink in over 12 years, and I am extremely grateful for that. I got sober in A.A. Here’s how it works:

Members attend meetings. At the beginning of a meeting a prayer is said. Usually, it’s the Serenity Prayer. You can recite it along with the others or not. There is no pressure to participate. Then some parts of the text Alcoholics Anonymous will be read. Early in the meeting, they will ask whether anybody is there for their first meeting. You may raise your hand at this time and identify yourself by your first name, or you can remain silent. Again, the choice is yours. There’s an advantage to raising your hand. Many times the groups will gather up some pamphlets and phone numbers of other women in the program for you.

Getting these phone numbers is a way of welcoming you and telling you that these people genuinely care about you. We are taught in A.A. that in order to remain sober ourselves, we have to freely give away the message to newcomers.

That message is hope. At the meetings, you will find other people just like you who never wanted to drink again. The hope is that you don’t have to.

The way the program continues to work is by asking a person, in your case a woman, to be your sponsor who is someone that guides you through the 12 steps. The steps are designed to help you clean out your fears and to accept love in your life. You will see the word God mentioned in the steps. Importantly, this is God as we understand him. When I started A.A., I truly thought it wouldn’t work for me since I didn’t believe in the Christian god. A person with many years of sobriety said 8 words that saved my life: Why don’t you make up your own god? I did, and I’m still sober.

After working the 12 steps, there’s maintenance by helping other alcoholics when you can, by attending meetings when you can, by reading helpful literature, and by keeping in touch with your sponsor. The meetings go a long way toward ending the isolation that most alcoholics feel. There are parties, too. You are not alone.

There are other ways to get sober. There are treatment centers and other forms of therapy. It’s up to you to find what works best for you. I found free help in A.A. That’s my experience, strength, and hope. Please, feel free to PM me with any further questions you have about getting sober with or without A.A.

@Hawaii_Jake Thank you for sharing that. I know AA has helped many people and for you to take the time to tell about it and how it has helped you is inspiring.

You might appreciate this article and the discussion that follows.
Of course AA has a great reputation for helping people, and they seem to have a very effective program… but I have known some atheists over the years that are reluctant to look into AA because they don’t want to turn to religion or spirituality for help. I don’t know if that is an issue, but just in case.

Your question is somewhat ambiguously worded. Most people seem to think you want a program to help get an alcoholic off of booze, but your questions doesn’t specifically state that.

I was thinking that an alcoholic might be interested in an oenology program so they could learn how to appreciate wine. They are probably used to drinking whatever happens along. Or they may stick to rotgut or something. Perhaps if they developed more refined tastes, they might be more interested in appreciating wine instead of just drinking it.

That is, assuming this is not necessarily about stopping drinking.

Although, there are people for whom the AA program doesn’t work. There are people who quit on their own. Many atheists don’t like the program, and there are non-theistic programs to help folks stop drinking.

I think groups are good, no matter what kind they are because they bring together people who are living the same thing. They understand each other. That is the biggest thing. It is easier to get help from those who have been there.

Of course, Anonymous Groups tend to be set up so people only listen and no one provides advice. The reason for that is to keep people from judging each other. If people judge,the group is worthless. However, it is possible to listen and offer help without judgment, and if I could find a group that did that, that would be best for me.

@wundayatta My home group generally offers advice by people describing how they each handled a similar situation or issue. And then we make it a point to speak one-on-one to a newcomer to offer help.

@wundayatta : Look at the topic tags.

It depends on how open you are to change. Most 12 step programs require a person to be easily influenced by peer pressure, and accept a higher authority, so they do not work for everyone.

Some people benefit from hypnosis, and others from health classes presented by hospitals. Still others benefit from one on one, personal counseling. It truly depends on the person.

@wundayatta : Teaching an alcoholic about wine-making in hopes he/she will enjoy drinking fine wines instead of other forms of alcoholism is like teaching a diabetic about sugar refining in hopes that they will enjoy eating refined sugar again. Alcoholism like diabetes is a disease. It has been accepted as one for 60 years by the AMA.

@JilltheTooth I worked at an outpatient substance abuse clinic, and I have friends who have gone through the program. It definitely works for some people. I know one person who came out of those meetings and the therapy she participated in (the therapy was not associated with AA) in my opinion a much much angrier person. They supported her supposed horror story childhood, and it just was not that bad. She did have some very bad things happen in childhood, but her anger towards her parents and family is over the top in my opinion, and the very bad things that happened to her were not caused by them. Another close friend of mine AA worked for her, well, she actually went in patient one time, and then ouatient another time, but she still has so much crap in her head that keeps her from being happy. She gets angry and upset about things that should not be so upsetting, Another person I know had a lot of success with AA.

Now, @wundayatta and I had a discussion recently about comparing people’s pain, not sure if you were on that Q, and what I wrote above sounds like I am dismissing or invalidating someones experience and emotions. I truly believe those people really feel very badly, their pain is real. But, I argue part of the reason is so severe is because of how they think about things, how they frame situations in their head.

I am not an alcoholic, I almost never drink, I have never used drugs.

@JilltheTooth I never look at topic tags. But thanks for pointing them out.

@zenvelo I’ve been in a group that acted similarly. The kind of advice people offered privately was not helpful. I think there’s something important about giving people advice in public. It allows others to correct bad advice, as we do here. When an oldtimer gives a newcomer advice in private, it carries a much larger weight than perhaps it should.

@JLeslie : I was just curious. My experience with dozens of people who have been helped by AA is that they all mentioned that one of the things they like most about the program is that because of its extremely diverse membership everyone brings something different to the table, and that was helpful. I went to AlAnon for awhile because of a drunk SO and I found the same to be true in that group. Everyone had a different perspective and it was helpful.

@JilltheTooth It would be interesting to speak to families who feel AA did not help their family member. Usually the program is not blamed, the patient is, for not getting on board with the program I think.

I don’t disagree with your experience regarding AA and AlAnon, I do know many people who were helped, and of course everyone has their own story. I know very few alcoholics personally. Well, I mean very few who are close to me, who would affect me, or who I would have a lot of knowledge about their lives.