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Hawaii_Jake's avatar

How did you feel when your first chick left the nest?

Asked by Hawaii_Jake (25561 points ) December 7th, 2011

My son left home today to strike out on his own. I’m sad and proud all at the same time.

How did you feel when your children left home to begin their adult lives?

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13 Answers

Bellatrix's avatar

Pretty much the same @Hawaii_Jake. It was a bitter-sweet moment. I was happy to see her flying the nest and being so independent but worried and sad all at the same time. She is my baby! That was now about five years ago. She is fine. We have a fabulous relationship and I love to see her when she visits.

I made a rule that Monday (it was Sunday but I decided that was rather intrusive on their weekend) night is family night. All my children come home on Monday and we have dinner together. We see each other at other times but no matter how busy everyone is, Monday is family night. All my children have no left home. The last left quite recently and not under the best circumstances and the house now feels very quiet and a little lonely. It is very tidy though and the electricity bill has gone down.

JilltheTooth's avatar

My empty nest isn’t so bad, as KatawaGrey just moved to the next tree over… ;-), but I do miss having her here sometimes, spontaneous conversations that we can’t have any more, the homey sounds of her bustling about, stuff like that. Yesterday’s parenting thread made me really miss having her around, and she’s out of town for a few days…makes it even harder!

You’ll survive it, @Hawaii_Jake , but it takes a bit of adjusting… You both will do fine!

Countrybumkin's avatar

My oldest daughter got married and moved to Colorado. Sometimes im very sad about it. I miss laughing hysterically with her. I still have three at home. I used to think i would be happy when they all grew up and left. Cleaning up after them, acting as referee, the constant asking of question after question etc. exhausts me. I never thought i would feel any other way. I was wrong. I wish i could make time stand still.

rts486's avatar

My oldest left for college this fall. I think I was very well prepared for her leaving because I just kept thinking about when I left the nest. It was a great experience for me and I wanted it to be a great experience for her too. She loves it at school but says she does get home sick. That’s about as good I could want it. My wife on the other hand didn’t take it as well. She kept saying she “feels like I’m abandoning her.” I have to remind her, our daughter is at a good school, lives in a nice dorm, can eat at the cafeteria when she wants, and has already made new friends.

wilma's avatar

Sad and proud, yes I felt that too. This was the goal all along wasn’t it? For you to help them grow to be an independent adult. Keep in touch, but try not to intrude. He is not gone from your life, just a bit further away.

smilingheart1's avatar

The move out is great at the point when they are starting to rule the roost, however the moving away part in terms of miles and miles must be very hard. My last one is over ripe to move but could be harder to accomplish than how to remove a ring topic that is still not a done deal.

Coloma's avatar

It was an adjustment and it took me a year or two to fully drop the mothering and advisory roles. She is 24 now and the adjustment has been complete for about 4 years now. She’s doing well and is a very nice human being, mama bird is proud, happy and releived it was a successful launch. ;-)

Skaggfacemutt's avatar

I had terrible “empty nest” syndrome, but not when my eldest left. When my 2nd, 3rd and 4th all left at about the same time. First my 17 year old step-son passed away, and a few weeks later my 3rd graduated from school and went to the Bahamas to work for the Disney Cruise Line, my 2nd bought a house and my 4th went to live with him to help with the mortgage. I went through a terrible depression.

JilltheTooth's avatar

@Skaggfacemutt : What an exodus! That would have brought me down, too.

Skaggfacemutt's avatar

@JilltheTooth It was really awful, greatly compounded by my step-son’s death. But a couple of years later they all started coming back.

zensky's avatar

I don’t know yet. {{{Hugs}}} buddy.

How’s the play coming?

downtide's avatar

I’ve been trying to shove my daughter out of the nest for some time now but she ain’t moving. I guess I made it too comfy.

flutherother's avatar

I had very mixed feelings. I was pleased that my daughter was striking out on her own but the home she left behind was very quiet. I missed the sound of her singing.

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