Social Question

LeavesNoTrace's avatar

What are some benefits to being single as a young woman?

Asked by LeavesNoTrace (2387 points ) December 12th, 2011

This is going to be a pretty casual topic. I want to encourage women to step forward and share what they appreciate about being single when you’re young. I’ll start:

I enjoy being able to get to know myself better and hear my own voice.

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16 Answers

linguaphile's avatar

I was single until I was 26 years old.

I lived in DC and spend many an evening curled up in an armchair at cozy coffeehouses reading books without interruption or doing artwork at my own whim. I went shopping and spent money without having to answer to anyone but myself. When I was lonely, I could seek out any friend I wanted to without having to worry about someone else’s comfort level. I could go out with guys from age 20 through 50 on friendly dates without it looking weirdly suspicious. I could write without someone looking over my shoulder saying, “write, write.” There are so many more…ahhh…. loved those days!!

the_overthinker's avatar

The feeling of freedom (to some extent). There’s no need to worry about your partner being jealous.

deni's avatar

You only have to worry about yourself. That encompasses so many things but…I think it all boils down to that.

Sunny2's avatar

You get to know yourself better and learn to cope on your own. Partners aren’t there forever (we’re mortal) and it gives you a sense of security to know you can live on your own.

AnonymousWoman's avatar

I am a young single woman and I love it. I feel more freedom now than I did when I was in relationships. Having a steady boyfriend who expects me to see him a whole lot would be and feel too stressful for me at this time in my life. I like my space… and I don’t want to give up a friend who I do sexual things with sometimes. Not yet, anyway…

Bellatrix's avatar

The freedom to do pretty much anything you want to do. To travel, to go after a career goal, to not do anything too. I know I didn’t make the most of the freedom I had as a young woman.

AshlynM's avatar

There’s no one you have to answer to or no one to make you feel stupid or insecure. No one telling you what to do. No one using you or leaving you hanging.

On the down side, there’s no companionship or affection, no quality time spent together, no being in love.

MilkyWay's avatar

I enjoy just chilling by myself and watching TV, and not having to worry about someone fighting over the remote XD
Also, you can go out and go places whenever you feel like it without someone being jealous or possessive over you.

sliceswiththings's avatar

Well I’m traveling around a lot these days, just for the sake of adventure (e.g. I’m going to randomly take off for Tennessee this winter without knowing anyone). I currently have an amazing man in Massachusetts, but we’re breaking up just so I won’t be tied down. It’s tricky, but it’s way easier to do these things single.

janbb's avatar

Learning how to take care of things yourself. I married right after college and came to rely on my husband for many practical things. Now that we are separated, I am having to play catch-up on learning them. Knowing you can care for yourself will make you less inclined to compromise in a partner choice.

Coloma's avatar

Young or old the benefits are good.
Time with yourself, doing what you want without having to take anothers desires, feelings, into consideration.

The freedom to follow your own agenda, and yes, learning to be self reliant, as @janbb mentioned.

If someone, anyone, woman or man, is very insecure and needy they will be much more likely to compromise themselves for the sake of a relationship.

I married young as well and have been divorced for almost 9 years now, I wouldn’t trade my space and freedom for any relationship these days. :-)

smilingheart1's avatar

Freedom to dwell where you want
Freedom to do what you want, move about your living space any hour of day or night
Freedom to choose that living space
Freedom to choose the city/country/area you live in
Freedom to eat what you want, when you want (no compromising with other’s eating styles)
Freedom to travel or not
Freedom to hobby or not
Freedom to befriend who you want without a s/o to “dislike” one or more of your friends
Freedom to make financial decisions
Freedom to change your career if you want without considering anyone else
Freedom to go back to re-tool, re-train or re-educate if you NEED a change
Freedom to choose your own clothing without concern for s/o’s tastes
Freedom to wear your hair any style or length that appeals to you

linguaphile's avatar

I’m not young, but like @janbb, I’m also newly single. I feel like I’m toddling around with baby steps, even though I had previously spent a good number of years single.

The first thing I was thrilled to do as a single person was to go grocery shopping alone. It seems so insignificant, but I was so relieved to be able to fill my cart with food that fit my health needs. My X was never willing to adjust the shopping list even though he knew my doctor had told me to get off the type of food he would buy. Not everyone’s like my X, I know.

I also love taking baths without being interrupted, being able to balance the checkbook without wondering if there are mystery purchases still floating around… so many more! I’m sitting here smiling at my long, long list… :D :D

janbb's avatar

@linguaphile We can form a mini-support group.

jazmina88's avatar

I’m still single, in the just say no club.
FREEDOM.
ZEN.
Your own choices
Only accountable to GOD

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