Social Question

AnonymousWoman's avatar

How can I be more like my Dad?

Asked by AnonymousWoman (6531points) January 11th, 2012

My Dad jokes around with people very easily. He can connect with pretty much everyone he meets if he is in the right mood. He knows how to make people laugh and he knows how to make people feel better about themselves and like they are accepted by just being himself.

If people make fun of something about him, he can laugh it off and act like it’s no big deal. If someone is sarcastic about him, he plays the sarcastic card right back at that person. He knows how to play their game and win without even trying and without being affected personally.

He deals with customer service very well, even if other people complain about the customer service that company has. He seems like he is a valued customer anywhere he frequently shops and several strangers really seem to have cheered right up after talking to him, no matter how bad or how stressful of a day they seemed like they were having before talking to him.

There are people who have thanked him for being nice and made it clear that they were used to getting really rude calls from people who treated them like they weren’t even people… so talking to him was a breath of fresh air.

I remember when I would go to the Dentist or the Doctor with him when I was younger, and whoever was at the desk simply loved having him there because he made the place so much more friendly of an environment. He’d include everyone and make everyone feel important as a result of his contagious attitude. He knows how to get a waiting room full of bored-looking people talking like they were friends from when they were children or at least cracking smiles (if they are on the not so talkative side at the time).

He doesn’t seem to care what anyone thinks of him: he does what he wants and lets chips fall where they may… and knows how to laugh at himself if need be.

I am not as brave as my Dad, but I see the advantages to being like him in this area and I want to be like him here. I want to have that effect on people.

How can I get there? Should I “just do it” and stop thinking about it? What if it doesn’t come out the same way as when he does it?

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6 Answers

YARNLADY's avatar

Just give it a lot of time. To help get practice you could join an organization like Toastmasters. They really helped my husband become more at ease in groups.

AnonymousWoman's avatar

^^ Great idea. I have been recommended that place before. There are several meeting locations in my city. Thanks for reminding me about them. :)

CaptainHarley's avatar

You’re already on the way. Just give it time and let life happen to you. You have to be confident in yourself before you can be confident with others, but you can take solace right now in the fact that the acorn never falls far from the tree. : ))

marinelife's avatar

Your dad has charisma, which is a natural quality. He is genuinely interested in people, which you can emulate. Smile and listen and ask questions as if you care about people. They will respond.

Judi's avatar

You are a special and unique individual. No one is exactly like you. What you see as being over sensitive, is the very quality that gives you empathy. It’s ok to admire your Dad, but you won’t be satisfied until you embrace who you are, and realize that your uniqueness sets you apart and makes you special.
I’m sorry you’re stressing. I hope your dad can understand that although HE can blow off criticism, it’s much harder for you. I hope you get what you need soon. (Assuming that this is related to the other question.)

Sunny2's avatar

Your dad is self assured enough not to care what people think and just automatically is friendly. It took me years and years to be able to do that and it doesn’t happen all the time. But I do enjoy getting responsive responses and smiles. It just makes me feel we are all part of the human community. Now and then I’ve gotten a negative response, but I only remember once, when I said something and got a fish eye from a mother and daughter in front of me in a grocery line. I really didn’‘t care.

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