Social Question

ninjacolin's avatar

Opinionated soul, do you ever feel like you are stomping over other people's worldviews?

Asked by ninjacolin (13822 points ) April 17th, 2012

Do you ever feel guilty about having a challenging worldview for another person to hear? Do you ever feel like a know-it-all or a dream crusher or even just a bit like a shameless jerk for it?

Now, I’m not saying there isn’t a fun side to putting your hand up and giving the right answer. But even when all the principals of decorum have been observed and maybe you’ve even bit your lip and are refusing to comment.. do you sometimes feel rude for feeling… “more certain” about something than another person?

When was the last time you felt like this? Share a story if you can. Do you never feel guilty? Why or why not?

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26 Answers

wildpotato's avatar

Only if the person is elderly, very young, or mentally impaired in some way. With these folks, I almost always just nod and smile. I also feel bad if a friend states something I disagree with and then asks me my opinion about it, because then it seems like my friend is slightly embarassed to have unknowingly had an unsympathetic audience. But since we are friends, arguing is done politely and even self-deprecatingly, so this is no big deal.

Otherwise, game on! Though I have become slightly more circumspect and even-toned in recent years, for which I think I have Fluther to thank, partly.

SavoirFaire's avatar

Nope. I only debate with people who have opened themselves up to questioning in one way or another. If you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen.

elbanditoroso's avatar

Absolutely not. They have their world view, and I have mine, If I didn’t speak up, I would be unfair to myself.

I don’t “stomp” on theirs – I listen, and then either (a) tell them where they are wrong, (b) walk away in disgust, or© engage in conversation.

JLeslie's avatar

If someone wants to have the conversation I don’t feel badly. Most people who are polar opposites than me on world view; I can’t usually move them on how they see things anyway. Their worl construct means too much to them.

Blackberry's avatar

I’m not forcing them to change their view, as I’m not trying to conquer land and people. Asking simple questions and making statements shouldn’t make people feel bad.

Inquire is what humans do, or we wouldn’t have this civilisation. It just seems useful to suppress inquiry because authority works for the natural hierarchy.

Trillian's avatar

How would you determine a “right answer” with a “world view”? Is it not possible that there may be more than one?

Response moderated (Personal Attack)
Jenniehowell's avatar

I never feel guilty or feel as if I am stomping on someone else’s world views. In my opinion our world views are something that exist within our own selves & I don’t believe anyone can step into another’s mind & stomp around unless we allow it. And in the end whether we allow ourselves to feel “stomped on” in discussions about world views or whether we don’t & it’s nothing but a good discussion or debate that creates a situation where everyone has a chance to learn something new & for me learning is the whole point whether I learn about a new topic or I learn that I or someone else is weak & need to strengthen the “inner self” in order not to give up power to someone merely because they have a strong opinion &/or more facts than I do.

I’d say that the only folks who really literally step on another’s world view are the ones who make, pass, enforce & support laws/acts etc. which actually function to take away the rights & freedoms of another to be who they are in cases where them being that way harms no one.

Trillian's avatar

Ah… so a “wrong answer” constitutes one which does not coincide with yours. No, I don’t feel the least bit bad, in that case.

ninjacolin's avatar

just being ironic @Trillian, haha

yea, I was imagining scientists vs creationists or theists who believe others are going to hell, or whatever the case may be where you simply feel certain about another person being wrong.

thorninmud's avatar

I do more stomping on my own opinions than on those of others. When I wage war on others’ opinions, both mine and theirs get further entrenched. I’ll be far less inclined then to challenge my own opinions, and that’s a very dangerous thing.

Trillian's avatar

I’m with @thorninmud. I’ve been told before that I’m a strong, opinionated person. I’ve been questioning my own beliefs now for many years in an attempt at clarity.
Your question has more than one answer for me. In the case of nippleheads like the Westboro Baptist Church people, I don’t think I’d feel bad trampling their views, but as stated above, their opinions would probably only become more entrenched.
Not to mention the very futility of it all.
Life is too short to wage war on every view that does not coincide with mine.
I just recently watched Constantine’s Sword and Lord, Save us from your followers. I see the intolerance right here on this site of the atheistic people and others with an agenda and I find it frightening.
People who have a world view which they are so convinced is the only right one and are willing to force it on others are scary.

wundayatta's avatar

God, I hope so! If I can’t stomp on other people’s worldviews, I might as well kill myself.

Sheesh!

tom_g's avatar

@ninjacolin: “Opinionated soul, ...” – wait, I already have some questions. I’ll leave the “soul” thing out of it and just assume we are referring to people. But what exactly is an “opinionated” soul/person, what is the opposite of this, and does a “non-opinionated” person/soul exist?

tinyfaery's avatar

Nope. I don’t even bother anymore. I have no desire to waste my time “debating” anything. Smile and nod is my go to argument for almost anything.

marinelife's avatar

Why would I feel guilty about the opinions that I hold? I don’t always express them, but I feel no guilt about holding them.

Coloma's avatar

No. I don’t do hardcore debates. I will express my feelings strongly when it comes to certain subject matter, but I am not invested in any hardcore right/wrong outcomes, unless the subject matter involves the abuse or exploitation of children or animals or other clearly dysfunctional thought and behavior.

DominicX's avatar

“Only if the person is elderly, very young, or mentally impaired in some way. With these folks, I almost always just nod and smile.”

This. But it’s not as if I go around shoving my worldview on people if they disagree with me. Not at all. If I were tempted to share an opposing opinion that would tear apart someone else’s (the circumstances would determine whether I would, for example, a homophobic opinion), the only thing that would stop me would be what @wildpotato said.

My friend’s mom is into all kinds of ridiculous conspiracy theories, for example. I know she’s mentally not all there. And I have no desire to tear her opinions apart when she’s preaching to me about how they’re controlling us with airplane contrails, etc. It’s not going to do any good. I just nod and smile.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

I don’t ever feel guilty, I feel it’s necessary to present alternative views on issues that get people hot and bothered. We all have blindspots, though and triggers, so sometimes you have to consider if all that you’ll get is an argument. Then, what’s the point? It makes me tired.

Skaggfacemutt's avatar

If I argued my world views to those around me, then yes, I would feel this way. But you have to understand that I am virtually an athiest and living in Utah – Mormonville! I just keep my mouth shut because no one will listen to me anyway. And they live in a fantasy world.

incendiary_dan's avatar

Blowing minds and smashing incorrect premises are my bread and butter. I don’t do so with malice, but with genuine concern and generally compassion. If someone takes offense, they probably need to hear it even more.

Coloma's avatar

@Skaggfacemutt Haha…well nobody can have a more diverse religious background than I. Born Presbeterien, raised Methodist, converted ( not by choice I was 11 ) to Latter Day Saint, then, completely atheist for years and years and now, the last decade I aspire to the eastern philosophies. Note: “Philosophies” NOT religion. “Lord, what a long strange trips it’s been.

Oh, and I live in the middle of Jehovahs Witness land, how they find me is beyond my comprehension. I just leave the guard geese out in the yard to run off the fanatics. lolol

6rant6's avatar

Yes, I feel guilty about it.

Symbeline's avatar

I just put my shit on a shelf, and let people check it out, if they want. I might challenge someone here and there, but that’s when I’m curious and wanna know. That I don’t do it often should not be seen by people as me thinking I don’t need to learn anything. I do admit, I get biased and infuriated sometimes, but I can mostly keep my cool, and anyways I’m more of an observer than anything else. When my stuff is on the shelf, and someone challenges it, I’ll answer to the call, because I wouldn’t put it there if I didn’t think I could; whether or not I can. I usually can’t. It’s a good way to learn. But no, no guilt, or nothing as such. I don’t feel that I step on people’s views. If I say something out of nowhere and someone feels trampled, then that’s not my problem. Lol. But I mean, it isn’t my intent to tell someone they’re wrong and that I’m absolutely right, no matter how opinionated I am on something.

likipie's avatar

No. People have called me those things but with most of the stuff I do this with, it’s an opinion so I try to never force mine upon others who disagree.

Paradox25's avatar

I think that one needs to be careful about asking such a question, afterall the ‘correct’ worldview has many different facets it seems. Personally I’ve never had my opinion change due to debating or being ‘challenged’ by someone, and I’ve never convinced anyone else differently as well. Basically I’m only interested in getting my opinion out there, and why I feel the way I do about it, much more than trying to ‘win’ or debate.

Unfortunately some worldviews may very well be inadvertently hostile to other worldviews merely by their philosophies alone, and where they clash with my own views I may be more inclined to challenge them. However, outside of that I’m more of live and let live type of person. Critiques work both ways so one needs to tread lightly here. Also, there are only certain types of people that I’ll attempt to debate.

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