Meta Question

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Time for Jelly Comfort. What troubles are you experiencing at the moment?

Asked by WillWorkForChocolate (22623 points ) June 5th, 2012

Everyone goes through rough times, be they relationship problems, financial stress, health issues, etc…

Care to unload your troubles here, and receive comfort and sympathy from your fellow jellies? Come on, we’re here to help. What’s going on with you?

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168 Answers

SpatzieLover's avatar

The election has me in knots. <fingers crossed>
It’s not looking good for laborers in Wisconsin right now.

I may need a big hug tomorrow…my guess is that after the recall, there’ll be a recount. Ugh!

linguaphile's avatar

I’m an emotional trainwreck at the moment… hence my quiet-ness lately.

Trillian's avatar

Um… my mom seems to be going through some difficult stuff and I can’t be there where she is. I’m actually afraid she may be developing Alzheimer’s in addition to some personal issues.

tranquilsea's avatar

I have so many responsibilities and I’m feeling rather weighed down by them. It really doesn’t help that I just went through a 3 day period where my sister (head injured) yelled at me every hour about a movie she wanted to attend but had next to no information on (so we could book a handibus). I finally fled from the home just to get some peace.

Judi's avatar

My life is pretty charmed.
My biggest sadness right now is that I’ve been on the waiting list for Club 33 at Disneyland for over 10 years. I finally got the letter and it looks like I won’t have the cash to join :-(.
That’s sad, but in perspective it’s pretty lame that that’s the worst I could come up with.

woodcutter's avatar

I really think my wife has been dying the last couple years. It’s a total fucking drag.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I could be doing better but I’ll offer hugs and comfort to any jellies that would like it.

chyna's avatar

I’m discouraged that I can’t find a job.

SuperMouse's avatar

The financial commitments my ex made during our divorce remain unsettled three years later. He seems to believe they are 100% taken care of and refuses to acknowledge that there are still huge outstanding issues – issues that he is complety responsible for. These things are currently coming to a head and I am the one who is going to have to settle them and, if I chose to, go after him to try to get him to make it right. Since he lost his job a couple of weeks ago I am pretty sure his making anything related to money right is not going to happen. His losing his job also means we lose child support, approximately half our monthly income. Thank God my husband is great with money and we should be able to stay afloat until I graduate.

Trillian's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate And just how do you know that a naked man hasn’t dined on my face? Where’s my damn hug?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Trillian Here’s a hug. I distracted Chocolate with a hershey bar. She’s pretty easy if you get my drift.

augustlan's avatar

Right now I am mostly ok. I have lots of hugs available for those who need one. <3

majorrich's avatar

I just came to the realization that my Mother is living with us and may well last another 20 years! I’ll be 70 by then!

rebbel's avatar

I’m in Greece right now.

ucme's avatar

Everything’s tickety-boo over here.
Here’s a little song I wrote…..... for anyone who cares to listen, some good “medicine” right there.

marinelife's avatar

I am having trouble with a project. Some trouble communicating with the client. A too many cooks problem.

Manageable, but wearing.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@SpatzieLover Here’s hoping things work out for the best. =0)
@linguaphile extra hugs and chocolate for you.
@Trillian That really sucks. My heart goes out to you. And your face.
@tranquilsea I wish I could send you a paid-for vacation.
@Judi Aww, that’s still a bummer.
@woodcutter Holy hell. You get extra hugs and chocolate also. And my sympathies.
@Adirondackwannabe Hush and give me more of that chocolate.
@chyna Oh dear, I hope your luck changes soon!
@SuperMouse Damn sorry to hear that. More hugs!
@augustlan Pass the hugs!
@majorrich Wow, best of luck to you. I love my mom but I don’t wanna live with her.
@rebbel I’ve always wanted to go to Greece!
@ucme Glad to hear it!
@marinelife Fingers crossed for a smooth, quick resolution.

We’re having issues with getting a home loan. Everything was hunky-dory until our little one’s hospital bills hit our credit (we can’t afford insurance). Can you say “sucks”?

filmfann's avatar

Temporary trouble with my vision after looking at the Transit of Venus. I have bursitis in one arm, and a torn rotator cuff in the other arm.
But I am healthy, happy, employed, and I live well.
I will not complain.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’m teasing you with the hershey bar. Then I’ll whip out the Belgian stuff. You’ll go insane.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@filmfann Aww, your poor arms! I’ll hug you gently…

@Adirondackwannabe You really suck. And I mean that in the nicest way possible.

AmWiser's avatar

It’s difficult to unload my troubles when I don’t know where to start. Let me just say it has been a topsy turvy time lately. Nothing specific yet specifically a lot of things (hope that makes sense). Just send hugs I can use some right about now. Thanks!

ucme's avatar

Don’t count the days, make the days count.
That quote was brought to you by shinyhappypeople plc :¬)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@AmWiser Oh sweetheart, I’m sorry to hear that. Lots of hugs for you. And chocolate. Chocolate makes everything better.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Brewery Ommengang. A Belgian beer microbrewery here. Guess how good the chocolate is.

stardust's avatar

Sending warm wishes and hugs for those of you experiencing tough times at the moment.x.
I’m not having many external problems at the moment, which is a blessing.

tups's avatar

I just feel weird and confused and restless.

JLeslie's avatar

I am still dealing with my bills, and my emotions regarding the care I received regarding my hospital stay because of my accident. I won’t bother writing all the details, but I find some of it very upsetting. Cried yesterday after speaking to someone at the hospital about two specific issues. He was not cruel, but I still find the answers frustrating. Well, one answer he admitted the it seemed they had not tended to one of my wounds well. He did reduce my fee by $104, because I had to pay that to urgent care a day after being discharged by the hospital because the hospital had screwed up. I guess that was a win. He said things do get missed, and had no trouble reducing my bill by that amount. So, at least that part of the discussion went well. My big upset is regarding all the CT scajs they did on me. I haven’t cried very much regarding the accident. I have not had any nightmares or lasting fears of the accident itself, but some things that happened at the hospital stay with me. I know eventually it will all be far behind me, but I also certain feelings will be easily triggered for the rest of my life.

Anyway, this hospital stuff and ongoing need to visit some follow up doctors is very difficult for me. I kind have PTSD with doctors and their staff in general.

Right now I am wondering if I made an appointment with a doctor who is going to charge me a fortune. After the conversation I had with his nurse today I have a sinking feeling.

I don’t know if it all has to do with the stress related to what I mention about, but I have been short tempered, forgetful beyond believe, clumsy, all sorts of crap. I just screwed up an hour ago at the gas pump. I get 10¢ off at Kroger for every $100 I spend. I scanned my card, then started to put premium in instead of regular unleaded. So I stopped after 2 gallons, and started over, and of course I had lost the discount. Stupid stuff.

Otherwise, things are ok. I am looking forward to my cruise to Alaska in a few weeks.

Ron_C's avatar

I have been loosing my voice since January. At first they thought it was allergies, then acid-reflux, now they gave up and are sending me to a eye-ear-throat doctor to look at my vocal chords. I think that visit is going to suck.

josie's avatar

I screwed up my knees roping out of a helicopter. Barometric pressure was low today and they hurt.

Nimis's avatar

[hugs everyone on this thread—all at once]
Thirty plus tentacles can come in handy.

Ron_C's avatar

@JLeslie your story sounds like my recent experience. I had an accident on a dive boat in the Bahamas. By the time I got home, I had an internal bleed and my entire left leg turned black and blue. The doctors gave me too many pain killers and I had trouble breathing so they used narcan on me that removed all analgesic effects of the drugs immediately. Now this part is unclear, they said that I went crazy then used another drug that was supposed to cause amnesia. I woke up the nest morning with the call button way out of my reach and tied to the bed with an electronic monitor. I wanted to sue the doctors, actually wanted to beat the shit out of them. I signed out of the hospital and went 30 miles to a real hospital. They fixed me up in a couple hours and I had my first meal in 5 days.

I have PTSD and am fortunate enough to be treated by the Veterans Administration

Neizvestnaya's avatar

I’ve entered the age group where the parents of people I’ve known are dying from things like cancer, heart attacks, strokes and diabetes but very few by old age. I knew this day would come but it feels heavy and sad some days.

Ron_C's avatar

@Neizvestnaya I know what you mean. I just turned 65 and people younger than me are dying and people I played around with are either homebound or dying. This sucks, I want out of here!

marinelife's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Sorry that happened with your home loan.

Mariah's avatar

I’m back on immunosuppressants after thinking I’d never have to touch the stuff again because of surgery. The hope is that they will heal up the fistula I have, but I can’t just quit them afterwards – apparently I need them from now on to prevent new fistulas from forming.

I’m pissed about having to take meds again, and I hate the way I feel about my body because of the fistula. I don’t even want to say where the fistula is, but I feel disfigured because of it, to the point that I’m relieved that my relationship is long-distance right now (due to summer), because I don’t know if I could handle having my boyfriend look at me.

If the meds don’t work my options are even more heavy duty meds or lose the j-pouch and get a permanent ostomy. Honestly, the latter sounds more and more appealing. It would kill my body image for the rest of my life, but at least my problems would probably be over.

I just try not to think about all this, most of the time.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Mariah Hang on lady. What you have is a real bitch. Be strong.

mazingerz88's avatar

Ok, looks like this is a good opportunity to vent. Fuck cancer.

JLeslie's avatar

@Ron_C Holy shit! I would say you win the contest if it is just a competition between you and me. I had an employee who worked for me many years ago wo had a horrific crazy story in a South African hospital that sounded similar to yours. His parents flew half way around the world to get him out and to a better hospital. It was really bad, I won’t even go i to the details because I don’t feel at liberty to share them.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate I also know another place that sells amazing chocolate. I’m just not telling you where it is.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Jeez guys, I just want to hug all of y’all so hard right now!!! Hugs and blessings to everyone. And chocolate. Don’t forget that, it’s some good stuff.

augustlan's avatar

Group hug

chyna's avatar

I’m always up for a group hug. No gropping though.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’m up for a group hug, but I’m also going to have an urge to grab someone.

augustlan's avatar

I’m totally groping @chyna.

chyna's avatar

@augustlan You’re allowed. Especially since you can spell it and I can’t.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I’m groping the both of ya, as I run away from @Adirondackwannabe.

AngryWhiteMale's avatar

Man. After reading all this, my troubles seem so trivial, but in the end, everyone’s problems are consequential, even if it’s only so for them.

A lot of woes, but the current one is my grandmother just died, and I found out in a letter from a long-lost cousin. Long backstory here, but still working through this, unfortunately with minimal support.

Sunny2's avatar

I can’t even talk about what I’m going through, but I offer best wishes, courage, fortitude and patience to us all. We WILL get through it!

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

I recently found out my mom has breast cancer. The past couple weeks have been confusing and emotionally taxing. I can’t sleep because she goes in for surgery tomorrow morning. To say I’m terrified is one hell of an understatement. I didn’t want to ask Fluther for support because I was afraid it would turn into a big ol’ thread of depress. Which I didn’t want. But seeing this question felt like an appropriate time/place to vent it out. I’ve had time to absorb the shock. I’ve cried a lot. Now I’m just scared and all I can do is wait. I want my mommy back.

JLeslie's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name Should the surgery remove all the cancer?

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@JLeslie For some reason the information we are getting back from the medical team is not as clear as we want. Or maybe my parents are just not wanting to tell me everything. What I know is that the cancer is no longer contained in a single mass, but we (I) don’t know how far it has spread. She is having a double mastectomy, even though it is only in one breast. From what I hear, the surgery should remove all of it. We’ll see.

JLeslie's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name I hope the removal takes care of it. I can understand why you are so worried. Are they recommending chemo and radiation after the mastectomy?

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@JLeslie Yes. I don’t know the severity of it though. Few visits/months long, low/high dosage. I don’t know yet.

JLeslie's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name Do you have confidence in her doctors? It sounds to me like you live in a different town then them. If so, I am sure being at a distance is frustrating. How did your mom sound, is she very upset? I think that would be the worst for me, is worrying about her pain and fear. Sometimes it is almost harder to watch then to be the one going through it. It’s all hard of course.

You’ll be in our thoughts. When you can, come back and let us know how everything is going.

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@JLeslie I live with her. :) I have insane confidence in the doctors. I reviewed each one with my mum. I’ll keep you updated.

I’m passing the talking stick to the left. I feel like I hijacked this thread a bit. Someone else gets a turn now.

augustlan's avatar

Sending more hugs. Lurve you, jellies!

mazingerz88's avatar

-Didn’t I just say fuck cancer?

I have two terrific ladies in my life that are suffering from chemo. And it’s their only chance to extend their lives. When they suffer, everybody suffers. I just hate it.

laurenkem's avatar

Well, compared to all the serious health issues I’m seeing here, my problem (which is financial) seems pretty trivial. Don’t get me wrong – I suffer from my own health issues, but I am extremely lucky when compared to others here.

Hugs and support to all who need them

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@laurenkem That’s exactly what I’m thinking as I read all of these comments. I suffer from endometriosis, which really sucks, but I cope. I’m having financial troubles, but I cope. All of these comments make me feel whiny, and totally grateful that my problems are as inconsequential as they are. Sheesh.

More hugs for my jellies, and lots of love and hope that things will improve!

Blackberry's avatar

First world problem: It’s too hot to drive with the windows down, so now I have to waste my gas on AC and keep the windows up. Feels bad, man.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Blackberry If it makes you feel better, the turbulence caused by open windows is more harmful to gas mileage at speed than the energy used by the A/C.

Blackberry's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Yeah I heard about that. I’m only going 30–45 MPH though, because this small town won’t allow anything higher lol.

Ron_C's avatar

@JLeslie ?Holy shit! I would say you win the contest ” that’s a contest that I didn’t want to win.

mattbrowne's avatar

My brother in law suffered an intracranial hemorrhage last week at the age of 56. He had surgery and was put into an artificial coma. He was admitted to one of the best neurosurgical clinics in Germany. We are getting news every day. The bleeding occurred near his brain’s language center. When they wake him up we will know whether he can still speak and understand. It’s a very difficult time right now for us. Any distraction is good.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Oh, @mattbrowne I’m so sorry that he’s having to deal with something so awful! Hopefully, he’ll be okay when he wakes up. (((hugs)))

JLeslie's avatar

@mattbrowne Sorry to hear that. Hopefully he will be able to communicate. I had a close friend who had a stroke that affected his speech. He did improve with therapy significantly, but still was limited somewhat. I know it was frustrating for him. One thing was the therapist thought only working on his first language was important, that those sounds and how engrained that language is in various parts of the brain made that language more likely to be recalled and articulated more fluently after an event like this. And, that working on two would probably slow or hamper his recovery. I think part of his problem was the connection between what he wanted to say and being able to actually say it. Anyway, because he could not really speak his second language anymore he, among his family members, was fine pretty much with some patience; but then out in society it worked against him, because he no longer lived in a country that his first language was commonly spoken.

My girlfriend who was in the accident with me suffered a skull fracture and subdural hematoma and concusion, and now she can’t smell anything, and can barely taste at all. What little she tastes all tastes the same no matter what it is. We are hoping she will get better as the brain heals, but I spoke to a neurosurgeon a few days ago, and the expression on hos face told me mors likely not. I’m quite upset she might have such permanent damage from an event. I guess with things like smell and taste there is no therapy for it, it just is.

Please let us know what happens, I hope he is able to make a full recovery.

@rpm_pseud0name How did the surgery go?

wildpotato's avatar

One of my best friends shot herself Monday night. I feel like I can’t breathe.

chyna's avatar

@wildpotato My heart goes out to you.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@wildpotato Oh my God! I don’t even know what to say to that, besides, “Oh my God!”

augustlan's avatar

Somehow, internet hugs suddenly don’t seem adequate. I wish I could hug you guys in person. I’m so, so sorry.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@augustlan I know! Some of these comments are so heartbreaking that I really wish I could do something besides offer my sympathies.

blueiiznh's avatar

My sleep depravation after a week in Vegas is pale compaired to others here.

Hugs and prayers to all those above and below.

Judi's avatar

follow up to my club 33 problem. I finally got the call to discuss cost and it was worse than I even thought. 25k initiation fee plus 10k per year. I thought it would be 10K and 6K.

JLeslie's avatar

@Judi Wow! I never would have guessed it is so expensive. How many people can you list on the membership as family members? Maybe if a few friends want to join also you can list them as siblings?

Judi's avatar

It’s to late. :-( I already let it go. It would have made more sense when I had a house in Orange County, but now I live 150 miles away anyway.

JLeslie's avatar

@Judi I would have passed also. So now you are $10k richer than you were yesterday, you should plan a fantastic trip!

Judi's avatar

I didn’t think I would be able to pull the 10K together anyway. I wish I could join you on your Alaska Cruise though! That’s on the bucket list. I think we might drive the Alcan Highway next spring.

JLeslie's avatar

@Judi I think the cheapest for my cruise is $999 per person (it is a popular date, so they don’t have any really inexpensive offerings) and if you think you can I will give you all the info! It’s my husband and me, my parents, and another couple who I have never met who they are friends with. All three couples planned excursions to do various different things, I only have one I am doing with my parents. In fact I am doing a different dinner seating than them so we are all kind of cruising together and at the same time not feeling tied to each other.

Judi's avatar

My hubby is a princess. He would never go with the cheapest. PM me the dates and Ill bring it up but I think he pretty much has our summer planned out.
Another reason not to do Club 33. I would never have time to enjoy it!

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@JLeslie Surgery went perfectly. She is home now. There were a couple things that the movies didn’t prepare me for. :) Like the port on the chest for when you start chemo. The tubes that come out of your chest that drain fluid into these clear, plastic, hand-grenade-looking things. It’s all a bit scary. I help with everything I can, except when it comes to draining those plastic things of fluid. Dad does that. I have a very weak stomach. I fetch & pick up things. Hold things still. She can barely pick up a glass of water without extreme pain. My visits to Fluther will be infrequent. But I’ll update when there is something to report. Also, we asked & the doctors still haven’t received the results from the analysis of the cancer cells. So we still don’t know how bad it is yet & what the treatment will be like.

JLeslie's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name Thanks for letting us know! I am so glad it went well. Everyone I know who has had a mastectomy said the pain afterwards is pretty bad. Is she getting reconstruction? I just got word today that the relative of mine who just had surgery for rectal cancer was just told the lymph nodes were cancer free, a sigh of relief, and the doctors are very pleased with ow well his overall recovery from the surgery is going. So, seems there is some reasonably good news going around for now with this whole sugery cancer thing.

I know what you mean about the tubes. When my dad had his bypass surgery there are so many tubes, and his skin was still discolored from the betadyne, and those patients are unconscious for a long time after the surgery, almost 24 hours, so he was just there in the bed, his body seemed small, even though he is overwieght, and it was very very space agey, totally surreal. I think they should let patients and their family know what is typical post surgery to prepare oneself.

tedibear's avatar

I could use a hug. I feel twisted up inside and like I have no one to talk to. Everyone has heard it all and there’s nothing I can do to change any of it. Sigh.

wildpotato's avatar

Thanks you guys and especially @chyna. I have to stop following this thread because I’ve been fluthering to distract myself and every time this pops up on my activity I stop being distracted. PMs are welcome, though I might not check them right away.

mattbrowne's avatar

Thank you very much for your kind words! The doctors are very reluctant to make any predictions. They suspect that a blood pressure spike might have been the cause of the bleeding, which was significant. He’s still in a coma. All we can do is wait and hope for the best.

bookish1's avatar

Let me start by saying I really love the title of this thread. Jelly Comfort makes me think of a hug from some sort of monster made of grape jelly. A nice monster, of course :)

Or maybe… A Jello Shot with Southern Comfort? No wait, that sounds horrendous…

Jelly Hugs to anyone who wants one. Especially @tedibear, I know what that feels like.

I’ve been feeling pretty sad recently. I’ve struggled with depression for most of my life and I usually am on top of it now and know how not to fall into it. Today for instance, I’m drinking lots of coffee instead of alcohol. But lots of things are piling up: I’m by myself in a foreign city (I speak the language and know the city but it is hard to make friends here), I’m taking care of my type 1 diabetes in a foreign country that’s not very accommodating to it and I’ve already had some close calls, I’m transgendered and stealth (undercover) right now for my safety so I have no one with whom to be open about it (this country is about 20 years behind the U.S.A. socially), I’m getting over a breakup that happened just a week ago with someone I was really intimate with and loved, and this morning I got a chatty email from my father, with whom I haven’t spoken in half a year and whom I haven’t seen in two years (wrt the trans thing). My parents were abusive in numerous ways, but I still miss them sometimes, especially my dad. Who, strangely enough, was the most directly abusive when I was little. So, fuck stockholm syndrom :-/

I’d love a jelly hug.

chyna's avatar

@bookish1 {{{HUGS}}}

linguaphile's avatar

@bookish1 I second @chyna…. {{{HUGS}}}

To paraphrase a quote by someone famous… joy shared doubles the joy, frustrations shared divides the frustration. That’s one reason I love Fluther.

bookish1's avatar

@linguaphile: Agreed, and thank you. :) These are for you

augustlan's avatar

Sending more hugs. Can you feel my tentacles?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Even more (((HUGS))) for y’all!

bookish1's avatar

@augustlan: Hugs to the Fluther Muther! Did I say that right?

@WillWorkForChocolate: How much work will you do for this ? :)

Dude, I’ve been in France a week and I haven’t eaten any chocolate yet. Gotta rectify that. I bought a huge jar of Nutella today. They eat it for breakfast.

tedibear's avatar

Thank you, @bookish1 , and here’s to you, too! {{{{bookish1}}}}

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@JLeslie It’s not good. Found cancer in the lymph nodes (it is aggressive), she needs to go back for a new scan to check if it is in her bones or other tissue. We are all pretty pissed because she gets mammograms done every year. Yet this cancer has been there for over a year. She is smaller chested & the doctors apparently should have done a different test along with mammograms to check for smaller tumors and they didn’t. We’re dealing with it the best we can, but when the bad only gets worse, we don’t know what to think anymore. I need to go to a gun range and use up all the ammo in the tri-state area. Blow off some steam.

augustlan's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name I’m so sorry, sweetie. Sending hugs and good thoughts. <3

bookish1's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name: I am sorry to hear that. I will keep you both in my thoughts. Hugs if you want them. My mom had breast cancer too. Fuck cancer

JLeslie's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name I can understand being pissed. I am pissed at doctors all the time. I’m sure finding out it is in the lymph nodes is quite a blow. :(. The doctors follow the “standard of care” and the mamogram is the standard. I sometimes ask for an ultrasound in lieu of a mamogram because I hate xrays for the radiation reason, and I had to get both done one time anyway because they could not tell what was going on just with a mammogram. My sister only gets ultrasounds because she has dense breasts. Did your mom find the cancer herself? Is that how this all started?

Ela's avatar

My best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer in January. She just started her second 6 weeks of chemo last week. Sucks because she lives 6 hrs away and I can’t be with her like I want to. I called her the other day. We talked for about 4 hrs.
Every problem I have in my live is trivial.

tranquilsea's avatar

I have to quickly come to a decision regarding a family member who did something so horrible it makes me nauseated. My sister is trying to force his re-introduction into the extended family without talking to anyone about how they feel about it. I’m very indecisive about whether I want to accept him back into my life, and by extension, my children’s lives.

I’m not sure whether talking to him is the way to make myself feel more comfortable or whether I should hold him at arms length. This is a kid who was once very close to me and my children.

This is one of the most complex dilemmas I’ve had to consider.

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@bookish1 Would you mind sharing a bit about your experience with your mom going through this mess?

bookish1's avatar

Hi @rpm_pseud0name : I wish I could tell you more :-/ But I was only 6 when she was diagnosed. I do know she had stage 2, I don’t think it had spread to her lymphatic system, and she had a double mastectomy and chemo for a brief while.

rpm_pseud0name's avatar

@bookish1 You haven’t mentioned it, so, I assume she is alive/doing fine now?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@bookish1 Ummm… I would do a lot of work for that. I’m not elaborating on what types of work. :D

Jeez guys… everyone just form a giant circle inside a circle inside a circle, and we’ll do a big group hug. Every time I think I’m having problems, there are more comments on this thread that prove me wrong.

bookish1's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name Yes, thank gods, that’s right.

linguaphile's avatar

I have a tiny magnet with this quote: Be kind. Everyone’s suffering.

Everyone’s struggle means something and we all need someone—for that reason, @WillWorkForChocolate I love your giant circle idea!

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name We went through the whole breast cancer thing with my MIL, but it didn’t end well. I don’t know if you want me to go any further.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@rpm_pseud0name My MIL lost her job when her company closed and she lost her health insurance. She found a lump in her breast, and then waited two years to seek treatment. They tried, but it had spread too far. She had swelling in her arms, but she kept telling us it was just the chemo. Finally it spread to her brain and we put her in bed and called hospice. They were amazing. It surprised me but they handed out the morphine like candy and we were able to keep her comfortable. She was able to stay in the house until the end. Hospice came in for guidance and counseling and helped us anticipate what was going to happen. The family all pulled together and shared the effort. I think that helped a lot. The experience sucked, but if it were me, that’s how I’d want to go, at home, with my family caring for me. Your case is a much shorter time frame. I think the chances are much better. Hang in there.

JLeslie's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe So she would have gone right to the doctor if she had had insurance?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@JLeslie Maybe. It’s possible she wouldn’t for a while, but not two years.

bookish1's avatar

Comforting tipsy Jelly Hugs to anyone who wants them tonight.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I’ll take one, thanks!

bookish1's avatar

squeezes WillWorkForChocolate and offers some olives

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Please don’t squeeze too hard. I just had lunch.

bookish1's avatar

I don’t give bear hugs unless solicited.
But I am taking the olives back since you’ve already eaten :-p

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Oh, damn. I was just gonna save them for later. <sigh>

augustlan's avatar

Hugs, jellies! I needed some hugs over the last four days, but had no power and no way to ask for some. Thankfully, I’m ok now, and in a position to give hugs again!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I said it on Facebook, and I’ll say it here too: I am so happy to see you again! (((hugs)))

tedibear's avatar

My hug needs today… I feel unattractive all over again. And I have cramps. And I think I might have messed something up at work on Monday. Bleh.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Oh, dear. Then extra (((hugs))) for you right now! Lots and lots of (((hugs)))! And ibuprofen. And chocolate!

bookish1's avatar

{{{ @augustlan }}} Welcome back and glad you are ok.

{{{ @tedibear }}} Hope you feel better soon, and give STRONG basil and cinnamon tea a chance if you haven’t tried it. Great for cramps.

@WillWorkForChocolate : I’m sorry that I took your olives back. Here they are again, maybe you’re hungry now :-p

tedibear's avatar

Thanks all. Ibuprofen and a fleece blanket over my middle did the trick. @bookish1 , tell me more about strong basil and cinnamon tea. I have a basil plant, and dried basil, cinnamon in both ground and stick form and a whole lot of different teas. (White, green and black.) Can I make it? Or is it something pre-made?

{{{{Hugs}}}} to any jellies who need it this morning.

bookish1's avatar

@tedibear: Glad to hear that.
I think I just googled ‘herbal remedies for cramps’ once when I was very sick and wanted to see if I could cook up anything I had at home.
Just boil some water and throw in tons of fresh basil leaves and the strongest cinnamon you have. It worked like magic for me :)

tedibear's avatar

I will try that next month! Thank you @bookish1 !

majorrich's avatar

We’ve been without power since Friday and it’s hot like crazy outside. Luckily our basement is nice and cool and we have a generator keeping the freezer going.

tedibear's avatar

@majorrich – Take care of yourself! Stay cool and hydrated.

augustlan's avatar

@majorrich Oh, man. That’s why I needed hugs, too, but our power came back yesterday. Take good care of yourself!

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

My best friend and a close family member are both pregnant. And I’m fucking devastated. I need one more baby. But I’ll take hugs if anyone has empty arms right now.

bookish1's avatar

{{{ @WillWorkForChocolate }}} I hope things work out for you soon !!

tedibear's avatar

{{{{{{{{ @WillWorkForChocolate }}}}}}} Will keep you in my heart.

blueiiznh's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate awwww (((HUGS))). Now I am devestated because I want another little bambino and you do also. Just a thought here, maybe we…..oh nevermind (((BIG HUGS)))

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Thanks guys. I’m feeling a little better today, but I haven’t left the pity party yet.

@blueiiznh You are the second jellyman to offer to knock me up. I actually appreciate that, LOL!

bookish1's avatar

I’ve been feeling twisted up this afternoon/evening. That delicious cocktail of anxiety and depression feeding into each other. I’ve got two social invitations for tonight and I don’t feel like I could be very social at either one, although I am lonely. Mostly I just want a real hug, and to be able to be myself around someone. Touch is very important. At least I don’t have any money to drink tonight…

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Well then, here are some (((hugs))) for you, and something that may not comfort you, but… I know exactly how you feel about the social aspect. More (((hugs))), and if you do go, try to have a good time! =0)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

You are quite welcome, love. Try to make the best of it. Who knows… maybe you’ll meet someone fabulous if you go!

augustlan's avatar

Hugs and more hugs to you guys. <3

majorrich's avatar

Woo Hah! Power came on 15 minutes ago! Now after 7 days I have A/C.

Ron_C's avatar

I’m not very good at providing emotional support, probably because I have some problems that I have not handled well. I remember the help and support I received, here, when my dad died. I just wish that I could return the support and help as many of you as possible despite my lack of ability to handle emotional problems.

This is an amazing group of anonymous people that are willing to provide help and support. I understand that I can only offer meager support but I’ll do the best I can because you all deserve it.

augustlan's avatar

Aww, @Ron_C, that was very supportive! {hugs} to you!

Ron_C's avatar

@augustlan thanks and hugs for you too!

tedibear's avatar

@Ron_C – Just offering up a cyberhug is often enough. Want to see? {{{Ron_C}}} Didn’t that feel nice?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Sooo… it turns out that this icky cough my husband has had for several months is actually “walking pneumonia.” Didn’t I tell that man to go to the damn doctor? UGH.Now he’s on three different medications and I’m doing my best to pamper him.

augustlan's avatar

Hugs to you and hubby, @WillWorkForChocolate.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Thanks, Auggie. You know… a whippin’ would make me feel better…

JLeslie's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate Thank goodness he is ok. That can be very very dangerous. Meanwhile, any new cough that lasts over a month MUST be evaluated. Never let him do that again. Forget pneumonia, which is serious and scary enough, it can be TB, and then he risks all of you.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Trust me, I knew it wasn’t TB…

Mariah's avatar

My beloved kitty is being kept at the vet’s overnight for a battery of tests. She won’t eat at all and has lost three pounds. At 13, with those symptoms, the vet thinks it’s probably cancer. They haven’t found a mass or anything yet though.

It sounds ridiculous, but this cat has been so supportive of me for years. When I had my abdominal surgeries she would just curl up by my belly and purr. I swear she knew I was in need. She’s the kind of cat that’s hard to win over but is so incredibly sweet if you do manage to. I’m gonna miss her so much if this is the end. :’(

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Awwwww, I’m sorry to hear that, @Mariah! Lots of hugs for you and your kitty.

bookish1's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate : Sending healing thoughts for your husband… I had pneumonia once and I know how wretched that is. I hope he feels better and heals real soon!

@Mariah: Oh here is an enormous hug for you {{{{{{Mariah}}}}}}} . It doesn’t sound ridiculous at all. I’m sure your cat knew you needed support, and now it is your turn to be there for her. I will keep you both in my thoughts.

augustlan's avatar

@Mariah Hugs for you and your kitty. <3

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Mariah Here’s some more hugs for you and your kitty. I’ll say a little prayer for the both of you.

bookish1's avatar

Extra tipsy hugs to {{{{any jelly that might need them}}}}.

hey, why are you staring at me. it’s the evening over here!

chyna's avatar

^It’s always 5 o’clock somewhere.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@bookish1 If you came to visit, I’d drink with you in the morning! :D

bookish1's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate : That’s a deal, Madame! I’m working on some 8% grocery brand beer right now! also moroccan olives, tomato soup and a warm from the oven baguette ;)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Oh my… methinks I need a snack.

tedibear's avatar

@Mariah – Gracious, dear girl, you have been through enough already! I will keep you and your furbaby in my heart. {{{Mariah}}}

Mariah's avatar

Thanks everybody. Well, the tests weren’t completely definitive, but there were a couple suspicious shadows on her x-ray and paired with her complete lack of interest in food (she hasn’t eaten anything in three days) the vet is pretty sure it’s cancer. We took her home today to just spend a day with her, but we’ll have her put down tomorrow. I’m so sad, but at least she hasn’t suffered much. She has been fine up until very recently. I will miss my dear Chloe so.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Mariah I’m so sorry you and your kitty are going through this. Get through it and keep your chin up. My prayers are with you.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Oh damn, @Mariah. My heart goes out to you. I know the pain of having to put beloved pets to sleep. I’m sending you (((HUGS))) and comfort.

Ron_C's avatar

@tedibear you’re right, even a cyber-hug feels nice, thank you.

bookish1's avatar

@Mariah: I am so sorry to hear this. I know that pain as well. She absolutely knows that you love her and gave her the best life you could. Sending you both hugs and wishes for peace and comfort.

tranquilsea's avatar

My oldest sister picked an epic fight (non violent) with me 2 years ago. When I refused to fight with her she cut off contact with me and my children. Thankfully, her daughter, who is 17, has continued to keep in touch via Facebook. We don’t talk about what happened between her mother and I at all as I respect those boundaries.

My heartbreak (beyond having my sister treat me in such a way) is that her son (24), whom I’ve always been close to, refuses to talk to me too. I know that he’s taking up his mother’s cause but it really breaks my heart that she’s dragged her kids into this. She won’t talk to my kids either and they all had a close relationship.

I know he’s old enough to make his own decisions but this really hurts me which is, I suspect, what my sister wanted to do because I didn’t agree with her.

He’s ignoring my friend request. So today I finally sent him a message asking him why he’s ignoring me and telling him he was breaking my heart. That may have been right or wrong. I need to figure out how to get through to him without bringing his mother into it. I want to continue to have a relationship with him.

This fucking sucks!

SpatzieLover's avatar

@tranquilsea My heart goes out to you. Hopefully it all turns out well for you, your kids & her kids.

tranquilsea's avatar

@SpatzieLover I suppose what will be will be. It is very frustrating to see what’s going on. I’ve spent the best part of the last two years mourning those relationships.

majorrich's avatar

Realizing I am getting older when I can no longer just assume I’m going to pass gas! At least I am at home.

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