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fremen_warrior's avatar

What if Giraffes ruled the world?

Asked by fremen_warrior (5471 points ) July 25th, 2012

What would an all-giraffe civilization be like? What books/movies/talk-shows would we see? Would giraffes wage wars? Would there be minorities? Would zebras do all the heavy lifting? etc.

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21 Answers

trailsillustrated's avatar

There would be wars. Giraffes are clique ish and territorial. There would be minorities, too. The shows and books would all be about trees and food.

harple's avatar

Computer keyboards would have to be a lot larger…

Coloma's avatar

There goes my trees.
Giraffes left to run amok all over the world would decimate trees and other plant life causing a lowering of oxygen in the atmosphere which would cause organisms to begin to reduce in size, and ultimately we would all end up dwarfs, even the Giraffes.
Bad idea. lol

LuckyGuy's avatar

Females would rub against tree trunks to make some of their spots look bigger. Males would ogle them and debate the merits and demerits of large spots.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

There would be a lot of neck bashing, generally a tall order!

Harold's avatar

The ceilings of houses would be higher, and all cars would have sunroofs.

Pandora's avatar

Humans would be pets that are kept around to scratch unreachable spots. Wait! Is there and unreachable spot for a giraffe? So scratch that. The world would be covered in a strong piss smell.

Bellatrix's avatar

There would be a lot less shade in the world.

prasad's avatar

Ever thought how long the bed will be? and how big houses? and how tall cars to sit in? One floor would be equal to around three to five floors! And finally Apple would make no profit out of long long earphones!

ucme's avatar

Have you seen the horns on their heads? They’re the devils greyhounds in disguise, I sense trouble is afoot, or should that be at hand?

filmfann's avatar

Giraffe orgies would result in their necks knotting with others.

cookieman's avatar

@cak would return to Fluther.

mazingerz88's avatar

Blind executioners who want to perform beheadings would NOT be discriminated against.
Makers of men’s ties would have to expand their work spaces.

josie's avatar

All other animals would be compelled to lick grape popsicles.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

They would release their buddies from jail, a.k.a. zoos.

ninjacolin's avatar

Why isn’t this a General question?

Bellatrix's avatar

Spots would be the new black in fashion terms. Nobody would ever wear leopard print again. Beauty would be all about long legs and… horniness.

Symbeline's avatar

I denno, but if they start ruling us like tyrants and being all asshat, I’m gettin’ my axe.

ETpro's avatar

A 110 story building would be REALLY tall. Solid wood doors would use up whole trees.

Symbeline's avatar

Imagine a basketball league with giraffe players. If they use their mouth to grab the ball, that’s the opposing team well and truly fucked. Unless they’re birds with big ass beaks, like toucans.

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