Do you think appearance was more important in the “old days”?

I grew up in what I now realise was a not very well off family on the edge of wonderful countryside. We were expected to look smart when required but as we spent much of our day climbing trees or playing at the beach how we looked was mostly unimportant. That is still how I feel, though I appreciate dress sense in others as a kind of art form and I do respect it when it is well done.

The people we grew up around were much the same as us. In those days people rarely went out at night or even ate out much and life was centred around the family and the home where how you looked was of little consequence.

I think things have changed. People go out much more to be entertained and they want to look smart when they do so. Designer clothes, of which I knew nothing as a child, have become popular. There is a rivalry, even among young children to look smart and to wear the best clothes and this isn’t entirely healthy. Much of it is driven by advertising.

How we dress always makes a statement about who we are and how we like to be seen and not caring too much about how we appear is itself a statement. I used to think how we dressed was unimportant and superficial but I no longer believe that to be true. How we dress, and it doesn’t have to be expensive to look good, is a reflection of our inner souls. But there are other ways to express ourselves.

Yes yes and yes. Now, it’s more “free”. One can wear 0 make up and garbage bag and still taken seriously!

I think there’s a lot more tolerance now for different standards of dress and grooming. That fits right in with our overall societal shift toward individualism. In a very short period of time (historically speaking), we’ve gone from a general expectation that the individual conform to a role defined by society, to a celebration of self-expression.

Not so long ago, a bold personal statement might take the form of a particularly audacious color choice for your pocket kerchief…but it was taken for granted that you were going to have a pocket kerchief. Since then, the latitude for self-expression has exploded outward. Aside from a few remaining pockets of society where some kind of standard hangs on, we seem to have abandoned any pretense to a template for what a respectable citizen ought to look like.

On the whole, I’m OK with that (though I do think we take the whole “individualism” thing way too far). Those rigid standards of appearance were too exclusive in effect. It was just one of the more benign faces of a narrow view of who counted and who could be ignored, and the other faces of that view were (and are) considerably less savory.

Heck, we had to dress up to ride on an airplane . . .

It’s hard to imagine a society less focused on appearance than we are today.
Most teens and 20’s have their pants hanging below their asses.

Appearance still matters. It still takes less time to generalize someone’s personality based on their appearance than to actually sit down and get to know them.

Appearance is still important, but standards have changed. Free choice rather than cookie cutter image is more important. In the day of little white gloves, we all wanted to look alike and matching accessories was important. Now it seems that being different is important. And those differences have a sameness among groups. Groups of girls look alike. Women wear their hair in much the same style as others in their group. We still want to identify with ‘our’ group.

Not at all. Granted, I can’t compare to anything past the last 30 years, but, I think the only thing that has changed is the freedom to choose how you style yourself. Otherwise, appearance is still a major driving force in our society, the roles may have changed, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that expectations have been eliminated. Sure, women are often the breadwinners in families now, but there is also an underlying pressure to not only work and contribute financially, but to still be a great mother, to provide healthy meals to the family, to keep a tidy house, and to look pretty while doing so.

@Kayak8 LOL! I never could understand and still can’t understand why so many people dress up to travel… I’ve seen people wear stuff I wouldn’t wear to a wedding…
I mean, it’s just sitting in one place for most of the journey anyway, you might as well wear something comfortable, haha.

”to not only work and contribute financially, but to still be a great mother, to provide healthy meals to the family, to keep a tidy house, and to look pretty while doing so.”

You clearly have not seen the parents at my daughter’s school yard in the morning. Women and men alike — everyone looks like they just rolled out of bed; literally as many are still in pajamas or sweats. Hair a mess, unshaven, ratty sandles, beat jeans and a tee.

There’s this one father. Tall, pale, redheaded dude. Always in a slick suit, nicely done. Sadly, he stands out like a sore thumb.

@cprevite strange, I really don’t see that very often. Perhaps at Walmart, sure, but at my kids’ school? No way.

@flutherother yes it does seem as though times have changed and individuality is more prevalent which is great. Plus a new causal has arrived, or been around for a long time, which is actually more pricey than the old formal. I find the way people express themselves through attire so fascinating and will continue to do so.
@minnie19 I sincerely hope make up is not the reason why people would take me seriously
@thorninmud I am glad you used the word tolerance because to me it points towards more progressive thinking within society. My own learning was, Judge a book by its cover. I just felt that so arbitrary and incorrect most times.

@DigitalBlue I hear you, and wondered if that alone had brought some sensibility to life, considering it is near impossible. Beyond cleanliness and correct clothing for a particular event, why do women have to pretty up? Not that I am against it at all, but just seems too much at times to do it all.

Yes, ever since they allowed girls to wear pants in school and at work things have steadily gone downhill. Casual Friday, indeed. Humph.

I believe the women had massive lady gardens back in the day, ones you could lose a badger in…......so I guess not then.

I think that appearance is just as important today. What has changed is what is regarded as attractive.

Yes, I believe a neat and clean appearance was a lot more important “in the old days” than it is now. Attractive or not, most working people were expected to be a lot more put together than now when many men balk at wearing a tucked in shirt of any kind.

Yes, my grandfather and great grandfather could NEVER be found wearing anything other than dress slacks, a button down shirt, and a tie:

At work
At the grocery store
Playing with the children
At the bar
At any social occasion be it formal or otherwise
At home relaxing

I think appearances (for NORMAL people, not fashionistas or celebrities) have tended to move toward lazy. Now people think they look ‘spiffy’ when they’re wearing a polo shirt and some deck shoes :/

I don’t think I have ever seen my grandfather wear shorts up until the last decade or so, and there is no evidence that my great grandfather even owned a pair other than swim trunks.

Looks are important, as they have always been, because they are our first clue as to the evolutionary fitness of a person. They give us an idea of how smart and how strong and how capable they are. However, while they offer many clues as to these things, they are not always accurate. Sometimes they are wildly wrong.

We have evolved to make these judgments based on looks because mostly we had to make judgments very quickly, and this was all we had to go on. So over time, we have evolved to look like we would be good mate material. We have evolved to look more desirable, on average. This does not mean everyone is a beneficiary of this evolution, but it is happen for many people.

Of course, being smart in addition to being human, we can see that looks matter, and so we work to enhance our own looks. We want to be able to provide the best first impression we can. Well, adults do a littl emore than kids do. But we are, most of us, training our kids to care about how they present themselves, too. We want them, these days, to get a job, and that has a lot to do with first impressions.

Young people may not care about looks in the same way as adults do. For them, there is the issue of establishing a separate identity, as well as the issue of getting along in the world. So young people often try to look different, and often different in a way that older folks thing is ugly. Young folks try to claim a new way of being beautiful.

And it does work. Notions of beauty do change, culturally, over time and place. That’s why there are variations on the notion of beauty.

Appearances are as important as always. But it is very complicated. The rules change. The looks change. The ways we care for our looks change. And then they change again. Or change back. But they will always be important as a way of establishing a first impression. For some people, they will be important over the course of a life. For others, they may become less important as they age.

I have found that my eye is turned by a young woman the same as it always has been. It is a visceral thing, and it always turns my mind to fucking. But that is a momentary thought and as soon as she is gone, I have forgotten. The young women have nothing for me, even as they dismiss me instantly, looking for their young hunks.

People do have something for me these days, but I find it online by writing and reading. It is the people with interesting ideas and interesting stories that catch my eye, so to speak, these days. I have no idea what they look like, and yet I can be very interested in them, or even fall in love with them.

If I were to pursue anything, I might ask for a picture, but I don’t. I don’t need to pursue. It is fine to love someone for the way they present themselves online and never let them know. I just admire from afar, and no problems get stirred up. And beauty is in their thoughts, not their bodies.

How you carry yourself still does matter.
While it is not required to dress for success in many jobs, it still will get noticed if you take the time and pride to make a difference.

Don’t get me wrong, talent and skills are very key to success. Things being equal in skills, why not take the time to distance yourself and be more saleable in your career and life.

here. Wow what a surprise, might be a bit long but very interesting.