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imgr8's avatar

Is love a real thing?

Asked by imgr8 (422 points ) September 1st, 2012

I’ve never been ‘in love’ to the best of my knowledge.. I love my boyfriend in the sense that I would sacrifice to help him or see him happy, but I don’t feel like its that romantic love, or im hesitant to call it that anyways. Every time one of my friends goes through a breakup my friend Kori will comfort them by saying “Love is just a chemical in your brain, its not a real thing and you’ll get over it”. That makes me kind of sad because I feel like if I were to ever love my boyfriend I would want it to mean more than that, and I know he loves me, or at least he believes that he does, but if its all just a trick to make us reproduce, whats the point?

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24 Answers

Nullo's avatar

Yes, love is a real thing. Your friend Kori is just being cynical. It helps some people.

El_Cadejo's avatar

How old are you?

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

Is love a real thing? Yes

Sunny2's avatar

“Love is just a chemical in your brain” is just flat out incorrect. You haven’t been in love yet, that’s all. You won’t have any question when it happens. Enjoy getting to know people. Be patient. It will happen when it happens. You can’t make it happen. Meanwhile enjoy the life you have.

wonderingwhy's avatar

Life (and love) is what you make of it.

Mr_Paradox's avatar

I love real? That’s like asking if time is real. You just can’t explain it.

Pandora's avatar

Love is very real and there are different levels and types of love. Like the kind your parents feel for you and you for them. Yes love serves a purpose, but it is not only to reproduce but to feel a sense of protection for someone else and raise and defend your family as a unit. The love in your parents case, keeps them protecting you. I don’t think they would think loving you a waste of time and most kids don’t think loving their parents back a waste of time. We are not a species that is meant to survive alone. It has been proven that people in loving relationships can over come illnesses and can be stronger and healthier than most and prosper. Its not to say that single people are doomed but their odd increase with a solid loving relationship.
You would know if you were in love with your boyfriend and it sounds like you love and appreciate him more as a friend. It is an addiction like no other. Once you learn to recognize the feeling you feel as if you really began to live. Being with someone you love, gives you the feeling of being complete, even if you didn’t feel incomplete before. People who are usually cynical about it, either have never been in love and can’t understand it, or have been in love and had it torn away or fell in love with someone not worthy. Yes, you can walk away from love, but I find self preservation is usually the only thing that motivates most people to do so. But there are people who cannot seem to love anyone beyond themselves. In which case they prove love exist. They just found it a mirror.

Blackberry's avatar

Yeah I think it is. It’s not something that’s empirically proven, but we all know it’s there.

Symbeline's avatar

“Love is just a chemical in your brain, its not a real thing and you’ll get over it”.

I tend to believe that it’s something like that. Whether it is or not, that doesn’t mean that it isn’t something, or, since it might just be some chemical, that it shouldn’t mean anything to anyone. Far from it. Love is something, that’s for sure. It’s real.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

You find real love, you’ll know. It’s amazing.

bookish1's avatar

Yeah, it’s real. Whew. I feel that being “in love” and “loving” someone are two different sentiments, although people might disagree with me.

ragingloli's avatar

Love is a series of biochemical responses, triggering an emotional cascade and impairing normal functioning.
The symptoms are quite similar to a disease.

Mariah's avatar

Technically everything we feel is caused by brain chemistry, doesn’t mean it’s any less real though.

Cruiser's avatar

Yes and you will know when it is and knowing what to do with it is elusive, fluid and a never ending challenge.

Keep_on_running's avatar

It’s unlikely to be the kind of love portrayed in films, but if it feels real enough for both of you then that’s good enough.

ninja_man's avatar

We are electrochemical creatures. Just because something takes place in your head doesn’t make it less than ‘real’.

dabbler's avatar

“Just” a chemical in your brain ?? Chemicals in the brain are very very real, including the infatuation/love response.
They can be very motivating and skew your perception remarkably. That’s pretty real.

imgr8's avatar

I guess a better question could have been, “is love something we need, or something that we think we need?”

dabbler's avatar

One of the most common affects experienced is masking/diminishing the negative traits of one’s partner. That helps keep people together when they otherwise might rush for the door.
In some cases it’s enough to keep a couple together long enough for conception only.
In some of cases it’s enough to keep a couple together until there is a child.
In plenty of cases the couple will stay together long enough for the kids to be self-supporting.

Whether our species needs that (any more) is debatable, since we seem to have overpopulated the planet already.

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