General Question

aggsalmost18's avatar

Why is he ignoring me?

Asked by aggsalmost18 (76 points ) September 3rd, 2012

This guy and I were friends in middle school, but I moved away the summer before freshman year started. He always flirted with me, but I wasn’t interested in him then, and basically started ignoring him. This summer (3 years later) I saw him out and I started talking to him over facebook. He gave me his # and told me to text him. I did, and we texted for 2 weeks nonstop. We even hung out together once. The only thing is he seems really insecure and even got mad because he thought I liked his friends. We had a good conversation one night, and the next he wouldn’t even talk at all. What’s going on? I’m not sure if it’s his insecurity or what :(

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13 Answers

chyna's avatar

Only he can answer this question. You could ask him, or just move on as he seems to need too much coddling.

creative1's avatar

Some men like the chase and when they feel like they have you finally they move on. Don’t text him anymore and if he comes back great if not move on yourself.

katieodowd95's avatar

Maybe he is just really jealous, of you or the fact you like his friends (not saying you do btw) and he does sound really jealous and insecure, and to be honest I wouldn’t waste your time on him (in a realtionship sense) because jealousy is not healthy especially over something as petty, it would drive you crazy! If you really want to stay friends with the guy, you need to make it really clear to him you are JUST FRIENDS! or else he could become really obsessed and possessive. If you do want a relationship with him make it absolutely clear you will not put up with any of his silly accusations and if he’s serious about you he will deal with it and get over himself.

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
marinelife's avatar

Who knows why, but go by his behavior. He’s not interested. Move on.

_Whitetigress's avatar

I seriously think you’re looking too hard into it. He’s probably focusing on having fun in his life. He’s probably even playing the latest video games online that were recently released. Since he’s in high school and all, he’s probably more into hanging out with his friends at the moment. I wouldn’t waste my time with him if I were you. (I’m not sure why my first response was edited out. All answers here are on a “what if” “could be” “maybe” basis.) There is no absolute answer here.

Kardamom's avatar

It sounds like unjustified jealousy. You said he used to flirt with you, so he probably liked you as more than a friend from since way back when. And since you said he was also somewhat insecure, he is probably certain in his own mind that you are flirting with or interested in his friends (whether you are are aren’t). He might have also though (wrongly) that you and he were in the beginning stages of a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship (even if you aren’t). You need to set the record straight with him, clearly, without embarrassing him or hurting his feelings.

If you only see this fellow as just friends and not dating/boyfriend material, make sure that he knows that in no uncertain terms, but deliver that information to him in a polite and gentle way, but make it 100% clear.

If you’re not sure how you feel about him and think that you might possibly want to date him in the future, just get it straight with him about what you are really doing or not doing with his friends and let him know that it really bugs you when he acts jealous, when you’ve given him no reason to be jealous. And understand that if he has jealousy issues now, he’s likely to continue having them, even if you do get together with him : (

wundayatta's avatar

You weren’t interested in him before. Why would you change? Have you explained that you are interested in him now and why? If not, he probably thinks you are just messing with him and you don’t really care about him, but are using him for some reason he can’t understand. After all, you didn’t like him before. Why are you giving him the time of day now?

Afos22's avatar

You must have said something that you are over looking. Maybe something that you thought was a simple comment or small talk. Maybe you offended him. Maybe you said he was a “good friend”. It could be many things. Read through all the messages that you saved and/or try to remember if you said something that could have offended him or turned him off.

tianalovesyou's avatar

Ask him! :) Maybe it was a misunderstanding.

cheebdragon's avatar

Maybe he just doesn’t like you. Im not trying to be mean, really, it’s just an honest 3rd party opinion.

Response moderated (Unhelpful)
kristalsen30's avatar

you should wait for his next move than you can know if he is still interested in you or not.

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