Social Question

jca's avatar

Possibly NSFW: Ladies, are you comfortable making the first move?

Asked by jca (27890 points ) September 22nd, 2012

Ladies, are you comfortable making the first move? Specifically, if a guy is acting shy and you’re fairly sure he’d be receptive, are you comfortable moving in for a kiss or whatever? Or are you patient?

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37 Answers

Aethelflaed's avatar

Not as comfortable as I’d like to be. It’s often hard for me to tell when someone is into me, so that makes it harder to tell if they’d be receptive to it.

augustlan's avatar

I absolutely am. I often have, with great results. :p

jca's avatar

For me, I feel like @Aethelflaed, and in addition to what she said, I feel like I don’t want the man to perceive me as aggressive, so I am unsure of myself.

Trillian's avatar

Totally. If I’m feeling it, I’ll let him know I’m interested.

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

Definitely! Even though I’m more on the shy side… like @Trillian mentioned, “if I’m feeling it, I’ll let him know I’m interested”. Sometimes I don’t have the patience to wait so I go for it and also it shows the guy that you go for what you want and don’t let him do everything.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Ladies, here’s a male that says I love it so much when you make the first move. Have your way with me anytime.

nailpolishfanatic's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe It’s sexy too and shows confidence right? haha :)

Aster's avatar

I never had a problem with it back then. lol

Shippy's avatar

Very comfortable, but I weave an intricate, mysterious web, then snare him.

Aethelflaed's avatar

@jca It’s oddly not so much that I’m worried about being perceived as aggressive, so much as that I’m worried that he won’t feel comfortable saying “no” even if he wants to, and that I’ll accidentally end up doing some ethically shady stuff. And, that it just doesn’t feel like something I was taught to do, and there isn’t much of a support system for, so I have to do a bit of a self-pep-talk before, instead of it just being natural.

janbb's avatar

I’ll let you know when the time comes.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Would you ladies just relax and realize real men love confident women. Just tell me what’s in your heart and what you’re thinking. Then go crazy on me.

Aethelflaed's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Who exactly are these “fake men”?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Aethelflaed I want a woman that will throw me down and tell me exactly what she wants. I have no problem with letting her take over.

Aethelflaed's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Cool. Aren’t you married?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

No, I have a s/o but never married.

Aethelflaed's avatar

Ok, so, you’re talking to a woman who isn’t your s/o, and she just randomly throws you down and tells you what she wants, and you… have no problem with that?

Dsg's avatar

I have to say I can be shy and reserved in the beginning of an initial meeting. Once I get comfortable in the relationship, I can be more confident in showing I like someone. My first move generally would be to maybe call or text first.

janbb's avatar

@Aethelflaed I think he’s speaking hypothetically. Don’t get your knickers in a twist.

Dsg's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe…. I take it ur s/o isn’t like that. You don’t think you would get sick of the women always taking the lead?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Whoa, I didn’t expect that. I love a women that goes wild on me.

Dsg's avatar

Sorry, just thought that might be a reason she’s s/o. Not trying to be nosey.

Dsg's avatar

I just always was under the impression that most men like to take the lead in planning and initiating stuff. I like to volunteer my input but I’ve always let the man make the final decision.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Daisygurl I want my girl to make the call. Guess what.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Daisygurl Okay what do you mean.

Dsg's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe…you said….Guess what. I thought you were asking me to say…What?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Oh Would you like to play a little rough?

Dsg's avatar

Wow. I didn’t expect that. Sorry, but I keep my intimate stuff a secret with my s/o.

augustlan's avatar

You guys are confusing me…

jca's avatar

@augustlan: Me, too. I got lost somewhere up there.

jca's avatar

I should clarify. I’m not shy when it comes to the first move being a phone call or a conversation, but I am shy when it comes to the first physical move. Specifically because I am unsure of myself and don’t want to be the cause of embarassment, and also because I don’t want to be perceived as aggressive.

Dsg's avatar

I can understand and I totally relate to your comment @jca.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Sorry guys. Dealing with something that totally stressed me out. I was a little wild.

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