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Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

Nsfw- If I decide in my next bachelor pad to install...

Asked by Imadethisupwithnoforethought (14401 points ) October 20th, 2012

A stripper pole, a miniature stage, and black lights, what do I tell my young daughter it is if she were to ask on one of the weekends she visits?

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16 Answers

Ela's avatar

Tell her you’re training for the Olympics.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Firefighter in training!

wundayatta's avatar

Tell her yes, she can take pole dancing classes and practice in your apt.

Coloma's avatar

Oh jeez, really?

wundayatta's avatar

Oh @Coloma—not that I would ever have a pole in my house, but it is incredible exercise and you have to be very skilled to do this stuff. In other parts of the world, they dance with poles and it doesn’t have the sexual connotations. It’s just prudish America that sees sex in everything.

Granted, the pole is used in strip clubs and it is all about sex, but my point is that it doesn’t have to be. It’s all how you see it. You can see it as an exercise tool, or you can see it as a horrible icky sex thing. Up to you.

If I had a pole, I’d want my daughter to see it as a prop for an acrobatic routine, not as a sex thing.

Surely you were open with your daughter about sex? You don’t strike me as the kind of person who would be ashamed of your relationship with your gardener. I mean, she is your daughter, so there is such a thing as TMI, but if anyone were to be healthily open about her sexual relationships, it seems to me you’d be the one who would talk about it all, just in a matter of fact way. No?

Coloma's avatar

At 3 you can play off your passions but kids really do not want to know that their parents have sexual desires. I would definitely plan on buying her a pony or something really mind blowing so she at least has a balance in the positive when she figures out daddy’s a horndog someday. lolol

@wundayatta True, maybe he can add a trapeze and a tightrope and do some circus acts for the kiddies. lol

Coloma's avatar

Okay dude, this is what you do, you make all the girls dress up in clown costumes…problem solved, good, wholesome family entertainment. haha

glacial's avatar

You mean, what do you tell your daughter about how you view women, and how do you expect that to impact how she views herself? Yep, that’s a toughie.

rooeytoo's avatar

@glacial – great answer!

Pole dancing has a sexual connotation in Australia too and I have noticed no signs of prudism here!

Buttonstc's avatar

Why not keep it in a spare room with a securely locked door?

There was a friend of mine who did (very) part time work as a professional Dominatrix. The room which she used was in the basement and always kept securely locked. For all intents and purposes to the kids it was a “storage room”. No big deal. There was never any need for it to be opened when they were around so it was entirely peripheral to their awareness.

Which is as it should be. Young children have no frame of reference nor any way to process issues involved with adult sexuality. It shouldn’t be a part of their world at all.

(I’m not referring to accurate info about their bodies and questions about sexual matters when they ask them. I’m speaking of the more complex parts of ADULT sexuality and fantasy expression, etc. That’s why strip clubs are for ADULTS.)

Whatever you want to discuss with her after she’s 21, is up to you. But don’t shove issues in her face that she has no capacity to process. Let her have as happy and uncluttered a childhood as possible.

This is not stuff she needs to deal with now.

How about putting her needs ahead of your own (which is what most parents know instinctively).

tups's avatar

“This was what I bought instead of stuff for you.”

boxer3's avatar

Just go to the strip club. Problem avoided.

Coloma's avatar

I agree with @boxer3

If you’re going to go to all that expense to build a stage channel that energy into doing something AMAZING for your little girl! A Merry go round on a stage in your living room! When she’s about 25 you can take the carousel horses down and you will still have the poles!

Aaaah, I guess there is something to be said for being out in the open, my slutty ex just hid his porn videos in my daughters Disney flicks…I coulda killed him with my bare hands, but divorce was easier. lol

Unbroken's avatar

OK I feel like everyone covered the little girl thing wonderfully. GAs.
On behalf of single women. What exactly are you going to tell them? Or do you just plan on hiring strippers who want some extra dough.

Shippy's avatar

The tough part is not having to explain now, it is having her remember at 18.

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