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bookish1's avatar

Does anyone need some Jelly Comfort?

Asked by bookish1 (13050 points ) November 27th, 2012

I thought it was such a nice idea when @WillWorkforChocolate asked this question over the summer… And I would like to pay it forward and start up another such thread…
In the past week, I have relied on the understanding and empathy of friends, strangers, and professors… Feels like I’m finally pulling through.
Who’s in need of some Jelly Comfort? You don’t need to feel alone.

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63 Answers

janbb's avatar

Me! Me! Me! The weekend was a very painful one as I adjust to changing family dynamics.

Dsg's avatar

Yes! How did you know?? I have been reading my first question I sent out to my fellow Jellies about Motivational quotes a lot lately! I have been a stay-at-home Mom for 8 yrs, and I am now a single Mom who is unemployed. I have been trying to find a job for close to a year now and it is really tough out there! I haven’t had any interviews or responses for that matter. Its depressing and I’m going stir crazy. I am a positive person, but without a job I don’t feel complete. I don’t know if that makes any sense. I am lacking some confidence because of it. I made a decision to go back to school for Dental Assisting, yet I can’t enroll into the program until next Fall 2013. The program is already full for this year. I didn’t realize it was something I was interested in until this past Aug. I did however, take a pre-requisite class that I need for the program and am loving it! The studying is hard, but I enjoy keeping myself and my thoughts busy. My class is almost over and I’m bummed because I liked doing something for myself. I have felt a little bit more complete. I was thinking about sending my resume as a new question to have my fellow jellies look at it to see how I can make it more eye-catching.

picante's avatar

The kindness of strangers, even from us jellies who are often stranger than strangers, is uplifting. Sending good vibrations to all.

bookish1's avatar

Hugs @janbb. I do not know what you had to go through, but I know how the holidays can be painful. They were real rough for me as well.

@Daisygurl, it definitely makes sense that you would want a job. On the bright side, you have found a recession-proof field that you are interested in, and you are already taking steps toward your degree! Awesome. I would be happy to give my thoughts on your CV and I know other Jellies here would as well.

Back at you, @picante.

marinelife's avatar

Yes, I am going through a spate of loneliness right now.

bhec10's avatar

I need some Jelly Comfort™ getting through my last 3 weeks of exhaustive coursework before I leave for Christmas break!

<opens arms and waits for hugs>

janbb's avatar

@bhec10 Penguin flipper hugs to you, @marinelife, @bookish1 , @Daisygurl , @picante ,Uncle Tom Cobbley and all!

bhec10's avatar

@janbb Thank you, that was a fresh hug!

get it?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Oh, pick me! Pick me! Lots of stress from lots of different directions right now.

And (((HUGS))) for everyone else!

Dsg's avatar

Thank you for the HUGS! Much appreciated!!

Mariah's avatar

[Hugs] all around.

Yeah I could use it right now. In general I am optimistic because I am doing well, but lately I’ve had a lot of worries nagging at me. I don’t feel quite as good as I did a month ago which makes me worry I’m building up immunity to my medication, which is something I know can happen. It’s not that I’m feeling unwell, I’m just worried about it.

And something weird just happened to me that is probably too gross to talk about here, and my doctor’s office has already closed so I can’t get any reassurance until tomorrow.

marinelife's avatar

((((Hugs)))) to everyone who has posted on this thread and to @bookish1.

Bellatrix's avatar

Well I am actually having a productive and peaceful week but I would like to share a hug with those who are feeling a bit down so. Sending you a big hug from Australia @marinelife, @Daisygurl, @bhec10 (nearly done then go and read all the novels you have put to one side to focus on your studies!), @WillWorkForChocolate (a special hug for you my sweet friend who we know had a stressful weekend) and for @Mariah (you have been so brave. I hope your studies are going well now your health is much better). And one for all the other huggers – beautiful people each and every one of you. Oh and one for my struggling honours student who I am now going to meet and I hope will have a glimmer of a smile on her face and is feeling a little more confident!

bhec10's avatar

@Bellatrix Aww man, I’d love to go to Australia one day.

Thanks for the hugs everyone, I feel much better :-)

YARNLADY's avatar

I’m almost embarrassed to say. Everyone else has some real issues and mine is strictly imaginary. As my DIL gets brattier and brattier, I am afraid she will stop letting me see the boys. She has already started complaining to Sonny that when they come home from grandmas they won’t mind because supposedly I let them get away with acting up.

This is not true, I make them have time out when they misbehave, which is very rarely, because I play with them a lot. She just plays her computer games every minute of every day and wants them to leave her alone.

Every Sunday when they go home, I’m afraid that will be the last weekend I will see them. It scares me.

wundayatta's avatar

I’d like to offer hugs, tea, and most of all, a sympathetic ear to those who are having troubles this week. Or any week. My week has had its ups and downs, but mostly it has been positive overall, so I have extra good stuff to pass around to others, if it works that way.

However, I must ask forgiveness if I can not resist offering a little advice along with the ear. It’s in my blood. Sometimes I can’t resist.

And as to loneliness, that’s something I understand very well, and I truly wish there was something I could do about that. But I think fluther is a real good way of getting some connection with others, at times when we can not find that in our real lives.

Coloma's avatar

Waaah…I do, I do!
I am dying from a wicked sinus infection and just got in a bit ago from the doc with an antibiotic. OMG! My poor head, I could barely drive, but I made it!

NOW…sweet relief cometh in the next 48–72 hours. I forced myself to go grocery shopping too and am all set up now for a series of major storms about to pound the west coast tomorrow through Sunday. Not that I have an appetite, infact, bad me, I didn’t eat a bite until 2:30 this afternoon and that just made me feel even worse.
Oh well…bonus weight loss, can’t smell, can’t taste, and am too weak to do anything but lie here and Fluther. haha

Feel free to send tea and sympathy. :-p
I was thinking about all the humans that died from shit like this a mere 100 years ago or so.
Oh the suffering of humanity B.A. Before antibiotics.

bookish1's avatar

@marinelife : I feel ya. I have realized that the next year at least is going to be a real lesson in loneliness for me. What do you like to do to deal with loneliness other than Fluther?

@bhec10, hugs, mate. You can do it! Is it exhaustive or exhausting, or both? At least you have your eye on the prize, eh?

@WillWorkForChocolate , hugs right back atcha!

@Mariah: I hope that it is not the case that you are building immunity to your medication, and that if you are, you will be able to find something that works just as well. I’ve experienced that with insulin before :-/ I’m on 3 prescription hormones that all affect each other constantly, so I know how stressful the changing medication game can be. Here’s hoping that you get some reassurance from your doctor tomorrow. Big hugs to you.

@Bellatrix, hugs to you, thanks for joining in, and good luck with your student :) I look forward to seeing some of my students as well :)

@YARNLADY: That doesn’t sound imaginary, that sounds like a real concern! I hope you are just reading your daughter-in-law wrong, though… Hugs to you.

@wundayatta, thank you for joining in. I’ll join you in a cup of tea. And I’m glad Fluther exists for that reason you mentioned. And if anyone minded someone giving advice on a Q&A site, you’d think they wouldn’t have stuck around… :-p

@Coloma: Here, have some of this expensive hippy respiratory tea I just went out and bought… I have had a sinus infection since Saturday :-/ Never think about how important those holes in your skull are until they stop working, eh? Please take care of yourself, at least stay hydrated/electrolyte’d and check your temperature occasionally!
And seriously, thank gods for antibiotics. I think about it all the time.

bhec10's avatar

@bookish1 It’s more exhaustive than exhausting, but it’s definitely a mix of both. And yeah, I have my eyes on the prize, which is my bachelors degree in May next year! Can’t wait!

Coloma's avatar

@bookish1 Oh man, yes, and thank you! Nothing worse than a sinus infection, bleh.
My fever is down after 4 Advil and I have been drinking enough water to sink the Titanic. Peeing every 10 minutes. haha
I hope you feel better soon too!

mrentropy's avatar

Nope. I’m beyond any comfort, so I’m done.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’ve had a great holiday and some good days lately so I’m offering hugs and a shoulder to anyone that needs it. And an ear if anyone needs that.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe Never offer your ear to a known biter.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate I find a little biting highly erotic. It really turns me on.

janbb's avatar

@YARNLADY Sounds like a very real concern to me and I empathize with you greatly. You are up against a lot with them by all reports and doing a wonderful job of being a grandmother. Keep on plugging!

cookieman's avatar

I’m shockingly good lately. So I’d like to offer ((BEAR HUGS)) to any jelly who needs them.
They’re free and non-fattening.

bookish1's avatar

Glad to hear it, @cookieman! I could use some hugs. And some cookies. I am 2 days off cigs cold turkey and contemplating free-basing the powder at the bottom of empty packs at this point…. Holy hell I hate being addicted to nicotine…

Coloma's avatar

@bookish1 Oh man….I feel your pain. Quitting is hell! Maybe you need some heroin to help you. lol

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Yes and I am in on everything nice in the jelly abode!

ETpro's avatar

@bookish1 What a great thought to ask. Yes. I’ve been plagued for the last month by a pain in the right side of my lower abdomen and groin area. It would come and go. I’d think it was finally healing up, then it would flare back up. I finally saw the doc today, and confirmed what I already knew. I’ve got a hernia. I’ll have to have it surgically repaired. Hugs back to you with your struggles.

bookish1's avatar

Thank you @Coloma… I should be used to it, I’ve done this about 80 times :( I’d be taking tons of stimulants if I could, but I’m sick, so I can’t even stomach black tea…

@ETpro : Oh, I’m sorry to hear about that :-/ I hope that you can get scheduled for that surgery and be pain free very soon! hugs

ETpro's avatar

@bookish1 Thanks, and best to you in the struggle to kick the nicotine addiction.

Symbeline's avatar

@bookish1 Dude, good look with quitting the ciggies, I’m rootin’ for you. :)

augustlan's avatar

I love you people. I really, really do.

Group hug! Quick, someone grab @mrentropy before he slips away. He’s getting a hug, whether he likes it or not.

janbb's avatar

@augustlan It’s ok; we’ve got @mrentropy surrounded now.

picante's avatar

Mr. Entropy, I’m in Austin, and I can meet you at (almost) any time to supply comfort. Even comfort food. We can wear comfortable shoes.

bookish1's avatar

drive by-hugs @mrentropy

Thank you @ETpro and @Symbeline. (Also hugs to my favorite Viking lady.) I bought an electronic cigarette last night because I couldn’t fathom finishing a writing assignment with the kind of cravings I was having, haha. I remember @downtide said he quit by gradually rationing down the amount of nicotine he used in the filter, so I’ll give that a try.

Hugs to our Fluther Mother, @augustlan!

Coloma's avatar

@bookish1 I used the E-Cig too and hypnosis. It’s a bit pricey but, very effective.
Works best on more intelligent people which I found funny. You’d think a more simple minded person would be more open to the power of suggestion, but, according to my A.M.A. certified therapist who also specializes in N.L.P. the more intelligent subjects are the most receptive.
To this day when I see the color red I think “clean air!” haha

I like the old ( I think ) Sam. Clemens ( AKA Mark Twain ) quote ” quitting is easy I have done it hundredss of times ” or something close to that anyway. haha

tups's avatar

Yeah, my mood changed a couple of days ago and now the whole world seems so grey without any valid reason. I feel stressed and like I have to take care of stuff, do things differently and I have no energy to do the things I normally like. :( But it’ll probably pass

Good luck to everyone else – I hope you’ll all find joy in the small things.

gailcalled's avatar

I am fine. If there’s anything I can do, let me know. Be specific.

Dsg's avatar

@bookish1 If you are willing to try a homeopathic meds, I have a great one that I heard helps with beating nicotine. Its called Rescue Remedy gum. Its made by Bach and its a natural stress reliever. Take a look at this website link What is Rescue Remedy. Most health food stores sell it. If you can’t get a hold of some, I’ll send you a pack to try if you want. Its totally natural and takes just a few minutes to start feeling some relief. I use the pastilles which are gummy tablets for when I have anxiety.

Coloma's avatar

Oh, the irony. My toilet has been acting up for a few weeks and sure enough, this morning my worst fears came to “pass.” Pun intended. lol
Sick at home, wild storm raging and waiting on a call back from the plumber.

I am opting to got outside and pee in the weeds over using a bucket.
At least I live in the country and am not having to pee in a bucket in my garage.
Does a country girl shit in the woods?

It’s a toilet half full morning, at least I can admire my cool new neon lime green rain boots up close when squatting. :-/
Gotta keep laughing and I am having visions of being nailed by lightening with my pants down, or, having a tree branch fall on my head. Well…it would be a novel way to “go.”

Dsg's avatar

@Coloma Hang in there! I’m sorry, but I had to laugh when I read your text. That is only something that would happen to me. Now I know another jelly that has just as much luck as me. I hope you feel better soon. :))

augustlan's avatar

I ran out of heating oil last night. Am also out of money til next Wednesday. Eek! Let’s all cuddle for warmth.

bookish1's avatar

@Coloma, that is indeed funny about the hypnosis. I’m almost sick enough of smoking to try that sometime… I’m intelligent but also super gullible so I’m sure it would work a treat!
And what a bummer about your toilet. I really admire your sense of humor. It could be worse… You could have gastroenteritis and not a sinus infection…. Don’t hit me! Hope you can get the plumber in soon!

@augustlan: Eeek! I hope you have enough warm clothes to wear til you can get some more oil! I know what it’s like to run out of money… I can’t go grocery shopping til next week either. Hugs and brings a pot of tea

Coloma's avatar

@Daisygurl Thanks…yeah, well, being a comedienne at heart there is always a humorous spin to be spun on any situation.
@bookish1 Oh man….that would be horrible, a regular shit storm…Gah!

Rotor Rooter is in the way and now, I can’t get their stupid little freaking jingle out of my brain. and pathetically I am able to carry the tune with perfect pitch. Make it stop!

Symbeline's avatar

@bookish1 How’s the electronic cig working out? I’ve been curious about those, but never got around to trying them. :/

@augustlan Running out of money sucks. I’m experiencing that these days, although yesterday I got my first work insurance money. Was almost a month and a half with fuckall. Good thing I had money saved up, otherwise I would have been eating belt soup.
But for heat, maybe you can snuggle up in some big soft pillows! :D

marinelife's avatar

@augustlan Thank goodness it’s supposed to get to 60 by the end of the week.

bookish1's avatar

@Symbeline: It’s ok so far. Nowhere near as delicious as lighting up a Camel Light and chiefing away on it, but it feeds the nicotine demons that stab pitchforks in my brain, and that’s really all I ask of it right now. I’m definitely hitting it far less often than I am used to smoking cigarettes (I smoke between half and one pack a day).

And it delights me how much you love pillows.

wildpotato's avatar

Yes, good God yes. My grandmother just suffered a third stroke on Monday. I am the relative with sole care of her until Saturday, at the earliest. Spent 10 hours in the hospital yesterday and going on 11 so far for today. She’s expressive aphasic and highly irrational, and it’s very frustrating for her that she can’t communicate. Though I keep telling her she’s getting more coherent by the hour, she doesn’t believe me and just keeps perseverating about how my mom is terrible because she can’t fly in right away, and how she’s sure she’s not going to get better, and how she wants to die. I’m trying so hard to not be crazy right now. I broke down just about half an hour ago and sobbed on the phone to my fiancĂ© for a bit. Feeling better at the moment, but I admit I came on here with the idea of posting a Q like Help, need hug now! Thank you for asking, bookish; it is very kind of you, and typing this out helps.

Bellatrix's avatar

I’m so sorry you are going through this @wildpotato. Sending you a huge hug. This must be such a hard time for you both. It’s good she has you to be there for her – as hard as that is for you.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@wildpotato I’m so sorry you and your grandmother are dealing with this. Hear’s a huge hug(((((wildpotato)))). Communication can be tough with a stroke. Try some other methods of communication? Writing? Pictures? Hang in there.

bookish1's avatar

Tripling the hugs for @wildpotato. That sounds heartrending. I will keep you and her in my thoughts. Does your grandmother like music? Is there any way for you to play her some at the hospital? Bless you for taking care of her, and don’t forget to take time outs to breathe, eat, nap, and take care of yourself as well.

Bellatrix's avatar

@wildpotato, I think @bookish’s idea of music is a good one. I was also going to suggest reading to her? Does she have a favourite book? It might help you by giving you something practical to do and her because her mind is active listening and perhaps not so focused on her health?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Bellatrix Excellent idea. A lot of times stroke victims can listen fine, but not come up with the words to express themselves.

Coloma's avatar

@wildpotato :-( My sympathies, here’s hoping your nana makes a speedy recovery with no long lasting effects.

8:02 pm on the west coast and….

My toilet is flushing, my drains are draining,
the wind has died down but it still is raining
I’m grateful the plumber didn’t say “fuck it”
or I’d be pooping in a bucket

Wind and rain and sleet and hail
no frozen poo is in my pail. :-p

wildpotato's avatar

@Bellatrix, @Adirondackwannabe, @bookish1, @Coloma Thanks, you guys. I ate a hoagie and watched this on PBS and feel much saner. Poor Bubbs, sundowning is really rough for her.

She can’t write quite yet, but we did try. Pictures is a great idea – she used to be a painter, so that might be just the ticket. Why the heck didn’t I think of that? She’s not too into music, but it’s worth a shot. It’ll calm me down, anyway. I’m sure I can find a way to do it at the hospital. And you’re right, bookish, about needing to pay more attention to self care; I think part of my distress earlier was from forgetting to eat. I read to her today – the Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – and she seems to enjoy it for a while, but then becomes confused, frustrated and tired after a bit. I think she is having trouble following the plot. Maybe something more straightforward. Hm. She loves Roots (and gifted me her signed copy!), but maybe that one’s too much of a downer. I will give this some thought – got easy-to-follow but not too young or morbid book suggestions, anyone?

Bellatrix's avatar

What about something like The Help or The Secret Life of Bees? Something that’s easy to read, has a message but is uplifting too? I will keep thinking. Glad there were positive moments today. As hard as this is to go through, this is incredibly special time you are spending with your grandmother.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@wildpotato How about just looking through some art books with her? No plot to follow, just paintings or whatever to enjoy.

Shippy's avatar

I just find it a comfort you are here @bookish1

bookish1's avatar

Thank you @Shippy! I am grateful for your presence on here as well.

wildpotato's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe I can’t thank you enough for your suggestion of art books. I brought a Chagall and a John Singer Sargent book from her apartment, and she LOVED looking through them with me. We even discussed art theory, in a rudimentary way, and she was very pleased I noticed Chagall’s influence in her own work. Seriously, thank you so much, from me and my family.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Glad I could help. Strokes are a bear. They mess with the communication a lot. But art speaks to all of us.Good luck with her recovery.

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