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Hawaii_Jake's avatar

What makes you feel safe?

Asked by Hawaii_Jake (25799 points ) December 14th, 2012

Is it wrapped in the arms of a beloved person?

Is it cuddling a cup of hot cocoa sitting in front of a warm fireplace?

Is it in a place of worship?

Is it on a mountain after a vigorous hike?

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31 Answers

Seek's avatar

I generally feel safe until I feel unsafe. I feel unsafe going to the ATM in the dark without a companion. I feel unsafe in parking lots after dark.

Generally people + anonymity + aloneness = uncomfortable me.

Coloma's avatar

In my cozy little house with lots of cash in the bank. lol

ucme's avatar

Familiarity (wow, that’s a hard word to say let alone spell)
Not that I feel unsafe in a strange environment, unless we’re talking about Scotland at night :¬(

YARNLADY's avatar

I feel safe most of the time, in my own home. I don’t feel especially safe out in a car or mall, but it isn’t a panicky feeling or anything. I just pay attention to my surroundings as much as possible.

jerv's avatar

Knowing where the danger is so that I don’t have to worry looking for the unexpected.

janbb's avatar

I have learned a hard way that safety – which I craved – is an illusion. I do feel most whole, however, when with people who love and understand me.

Shippy's avatar

Love this question since it’s been on my mind a lot. I have to agree with @Coloma , financial security makes me feel safe. But that is not always a given, nor realistic.

I have often found certain people make me feel safe. Those are the ones that do as they say they will. Are consistent, have my best interest at heart and also can understand me. Not all in one person but maybe in a few different people. Each of those mentioned make me feel safe. Like being understood for example. It’s just hard when you lose one. To a death or something. I am lucky though, I do have one person on earth who understands me and puts up with me. To him, I am ever grateful and thankful. He’s a Saint clearly.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

My best friend and my partner. Being at school.

AshlynM's avatar

Being with my boyfriend. He’s 6 ft tall.

marinelife's avatar

My husband’s arms around me.

bookish1's avatar

Having food (especially carbohydrates and protein), shelter, a job, warm clothes.
Health insurance. I hate that in my country, health care is not considered a universal right, and I never take this for granted.

hearkat's avatar

I’m like @Seek_Kolinahr, I feel safe most of the time, but occasionally find myself in a situation or environment where there is a higher risk of something bad happening and I realize that perhaps I should give a bit more forethought to where I am headed and what type of neighborhoods I’ll be in.

CuriousLoner's avatar

Knowledge and training.

newtscamander's avatar

Well, definitely not seeing the news.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Not much anymore!

Coloma's avatar

@scuniper Amen to that! Media is evil, unhook from the slow fear drip.

Bellatrix's avatar

I’m very lucky because I can say I rarely feel ‘unsafe’. Things that enhance my feeling of security include being in my home with my partner, being with him generally, and being financially secure.

newtscamander's avatar

@Coloma for example, just now, all this talk about the school shooting was getting a bit too much for me, and I noticed that when on the net, there is practically no site to “escape” too were there will be no pictures, articles or discussions about it. But then it’s hard to take a break from life these days anyway…how exhausting sometimes!

Coloma's avatar

@scuniper Yes, I engaged a bit, but now…time to defrag.

YARNLADY's avatar

If I would let every tragedy change my way of life, I wouldn’t have anything left.

I have seen news of mass shootings at McDonalds , 21 people dead; an airplane crashed into an ice cream parlor, 22 people killed; University of Texas campus, 16 killed, 30 wounded; a man drives his truck into a restaurant and shoots 23 people.

There are also police actions that got entirely out of control have resulted in hundreds of deaths as in the MOVE incident that killed 11 and The WACO tragedy that killed 82 men, women and children, and the Watts riots that resulted in 34 deaths. I was in ear shot of that one.

According to statistics, most children who are killed are murdered by their own relatives. The mass deaths related to automobiles doesn’t stop people from driving. The huge tolls when a plane crashes doesn’t stop me from flying.

Death often comes by surprise, so there’s no sense worrying about it.

Unbroken's avatar

I remember the first time I truly felt safe was wrapped in my love’s arms.

I felt instantly sheltered warm relaxed comfortable accepted.
I don’t think I have ever experienced that feeling again.

It is not that I always feel unsafe. I just never felt protected before.

I feel safe to express my thoughts on paper or to a computer.

I feel comfortable with myself outside in nature.

Leanne1986's avatar

Lying in bed laughing and joking with my partner.

Visiting my Grandmother.

Being with my dogs.

All of these things give me a sense of feeling “safe” mentally or physically (or both).

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augustlan's avatar

I don’t generally feel unsafe, but my husband does make me feel safer. He’s the first person to ever make me feel protected.

Yeahright's avatar

Not one single thing/person makes me feel safe. I feel very unsafe all the time. As a matter of fact, I am in a permanent state of unsafeness.

I feel unsafe because of climate change and natural disasters.
I feel unsafe of resources being scarce.
I feel unsafe because of wackos like the Connecticut shooter and the like.
Also, the economy crisis, terrorists, food,
you name it, the list goes on.

I can’t see how being in a loved one’s arms can change all the things that we have no control over. (I am NOT criticizing those who do, so please don’t feel attacked. I just wish I understood how that makes some people feel safe.)

I think the world is a very scary place and that we are not any safer when we leave home (or even when we stay home) than cavemen were. There are no dinosaurs out to eat us but there are plenty of other just-as-bad stuff out there.

Feeling safe is of course a state of mind, but I wonder how people can feel safe knowing that all the scary stuff is out there. Some people like @Coloma seem to have it all figured out by not watching the news or example. But in my case not watching the news doesn’t make all dangerous stuff disappear and I can’t pretend is not there.

hearkat's avatar

@Yeahright – I know that I can die at any moment for any number of reasons. I suppose I could clarify my statement and say that I feel at ease nearly all the time, because I know that there is very little over which I have control, and worrying about it destroys my ability to make the most of whatever number of breaths I have left. Letting go of the illusion of control was a key part of achieving a sense of inner peace.

bolwerk's avatar

I avoid ODing on news, and try to look at things quantitatively. It’s not necessarily reassuring, but it gives you better perspective.

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yankeetooter's avatar

There is one person in whose presence I feel safe…mainly because I trust him not to ever knowingly hurt me. It took a long time to realize this (my fault, not his) because I have been hurt so many times in the past…

MellisaTurner's avatar

Being with my family, makes me feel safe always.

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