Would you open this card?
About 5 years ago, I wrote my mother a letter telling her I had to cut off contact with her in order to preserve my own mental health. I explained exactly why, and that I wanted no contact with her whatsoever. I had excellent reasons for doing so, as many of you probably know. I was as kind about it as I could possibly be, while still being very clear and firm.
For quite a long time, she followed my wishes, and I heard nothing from her. Then, this past August, she sent me a birthday card, which I opened. I guess I was curious as to what she had to say after all that time.
In it, she’d written “Five years is long enough” and gave me her current contact information. Nothing else. It was very apparent that she still doesn’t ‘get it’. It’s like she thinks that my reasons for breaking off our relationship were to punish her, and that, like a prison sentence, the punishment should have a finite end date. Nothing could be further from the truth. I wish her no ill will, but I can’t have her in my life for my own well-being. That won’t change. The whole thing made me anxious and a bit angry, honestly. I did not respond.
Today, there is a Christmas card in my mailbox, with her name and return address on it. A big part of me thinks I should throw it away without opening it. Another part of me is curious again. What would you do?