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Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

2013 is your exit year from Earth, how would you want your death to come?

Asked by Hypocrisy_Central (22077 points ) December 31st, 2012

You learn by way of fortune cookie, tarot card reader, tea leaves, a dream, phantom email, however it takes you to believe it, that you WILL NOT make it to the end of 2013; somewhere along the way your time will be up and you will be dead. If you know you have a choice or influence in how you go, and that way cannot go by dying in your sleep, drifting to a coma and not waking, etc, it had to be by gunshot would, falling, having something fall on you, shocked to death, gassed (even if you did not know you were being gassed like carbon monoxide poisoning), allergic reaction, etc, how or what method of death would you choose (you can choose two)?

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34 Answers

CWOTUS's avatar

I expect that my epitaph will read something like:

He lived a full, rich life, and died at 69. He was 98 at the time.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

After I say my last ‘I love you’s’ to my children and with my love at my side. I prefer to just die, without thrashing around too much.

poisonedantidote's avatar

Spontaneous combustion in a fireworks factory.

EDIT: Option 2, Fall of a sky scraper with a rectum, stomach, mouth, ears, nose, and pockets stuffed with candy, glitter and confetti. Piñata style.

wundayatta's avatar

Something really quick and unexpected, so I have no time to experience fear, sadness or pain. In other words, I don’t know what killed me, because I was dead before I knew it.

Sayonara, chump!

WestRiverrat's avatar

By surprise.

Bellatrix's avatar

I agree with @wundayatta. Something very quick and unexpected. Here one moment – gone the next. Poof…

pleiades's avatar

Walking through the mystic forests of China’s country side holding both my wife and sons hand and the world just blows up or something.

Pandora's avatar

Huge tidal wave that knocks me out and or breaks my neck before I would drown.

AshLeigh's avatar

I want to die the way I lived.
Staying alive, and not dying.

Coloma's avatar

I’d probably just get naked and coat my body in molasses, roll around in a bunch of oats and let the 3 donkeys, 2 mules, the draft horse and the geese have a picnic on my body. Nibbled to death by a herd of horses. Of course this would take place after I ate a couple of my happy brownies. Death by herbivores under the influence of the herbal essence. lol

ragingloli's avatar

The entire planet explodes. No one escapes.

Coloma's avatar

^^^ That’s the optimum,I agree. haha

Sunny2's avatar

With my home in a state of pristine cleanliness; all my papers in order; all the things I’ve been meaning to do, done; a plate of fresh baked cookies ready to eat; me in my bed having died in my sleep and having dreamed a lovely dream . . ... ..... .... ... .. . . . .

burntbonez's avatar

At the last moment possible.

hearkat's avatar

I don’t know enough about ways to die in order to be specific, but like @wundayatta, I’d want it to be unexpected and immediate.

ETpro's avatar

Well, I want to, as the T.S. Elliot said “Go out with a bang, not a whimper.” So to improve my odds, I am soliciting applications to bang me. All Fluther members are invited to apply. If I’m getting banged nearly all the time, my chances get to be acceptably high of departing on my own ideal terms.

Coloma's avatar

@ETpro Going out with a bang means an aneurism..“Oh wow, I feel kinda funny, ...keel over dead. lol

ETpro's avatar

Druther have my head explode than one toe at a time.

Coloma's avatar

Yeah….I am hating having ” trigger finger”. Shit, really…so this is how it’s going to be, one small part breaking, one at a time? Fuck. haha

ETpro's avatar

Right now, my explosion is in the abdominal wall just to the right of where the joy-stick attaches. A hernia, the medicine men call it. I just call it PAIN. I am actually looking forward to Jan 2nd and my first visit with the sawbones who claims to be able to fix it. This is just the imaging to see what’s torn and where. With that done, they will plot a line of attack to staple me back together.

Coloma's avatar

@ETpro Bummer. :-( Hey….reseasrch the mesh netting they use, I have a friend who had 2 years of issues post hernia surgery from the mesh. Some people don’t tolerate that material well. Okay…you win, I’ll keep my snappy, poppy, defective thumb problem. haha

ETpro's avatar

@Coloma Yeah, while aging is definitely a bitch, it beats the bejesus out of early action to avoid it.

TinyChi's avatar

Uhh I guess I’d rather have my head blown off or something. You know, something quick and painless.

ETpro's avatar

@TinyChi I don’t want to publish how-to instructions that might be read by disturbed personalities who might try them with no good reason to check out. But there are plans that are pretty foolproof and also pain free—actually pleasant. I’d plan to check out that way, sitting at the back of a speed boat, so my body could keep the fish happy for a time. And Spoony loves fish, so she approves of this plan.

Symbeline's avatar

I want some maniac to rip out my intestines and hang me with them. Might as well have a cool death.

Actually though…that would totally suck. Something quick and painless, like getting stepped on by Godzilla.

ucme's avatar

I’d quite happily die laughing whilst being tickled on the end of my penis by Kelly Brook disguised as Michael Myers carrying a big red feather to replicate his knife.

Symbeline's avatar

Wouldn’t someone a little more sloppy, like Leatherface, be more exciting? XD

ucme's avatar

Nah, him got bad teeth man XD

ragingloli's avatar

@ucme
See, already one thing in common!

ucme's avatar

Oh that old turkey, no not your mother!

ZEPHYRA's avatar

By eating so much cake, ice cream, desserts that eventually I would sweetly eat my way to death! (No savories, only sweet stuff)

ETpro's avatar

@ZEPHYRA Yeah, death by chocolate works for me.

Symbeline's avatar

Leatherface’s teeth are so bad that he has to wear someone else’s.

ucme's avatar

He asked them nicely though, “you can have them back tuesday”…or should that be chews-day?

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