Social Question

burntbonez's avatar

Guys, has a woman ever told you you aren't like other guys?

Asked by burntbonez (5194 points ) January 8th, 2013

In what way did they think you weren’t like other guys? Did you agree with the woman? Were you proud or ashamed of this difference?

Women, have you ever said this to a guy? What were you referring to?

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31 Answers

livelaughlove21's avatar

Ha! What a line..,

poisonedantidote's avatar

I get told this or one of its variations on an almost daily basis, by my girlfriend/fiance. I take it as a compliment.

I also think it is kind of true, due to some of my traits and philosophies. For example, I would never cheat on her, and while she can never know that is true for a fact, she can assume it is true based on how she sees me act. In all the time we have been together, she has never even caught me looking at another woman, the reason being that I have not looked at any other women.

I have also been described at “recklessly honest” by many people. She knows, that while I am totally full of shit and lies towards many people, that I have never lied to her. She knows she can count on me for a blunt and to the point answer, regardless of consequences.

In a lot of ways, I think I am different to most people. Having said that, most people are probably different to most people anyway.

rojo's avatar

Could be that third testicle.

marinelife's avatar

I never have told someone that because I haven’t met any males that weren’t like others.

ragingloli's avatar

Yes…
The flattery did not save her though.

bookish1's avatar

Yeah, a girlfriend used to tell me that frequently… Then she ended up leaving me because she decided she couldn’t date guys.

AshLeigh's avatar

Never said that. I don’t see why I would, since I’m convinced that no one is special. We’re brought up to believe that we are, but as far as I’ve seen we are all the same.

KNOWITALL's avatar

I’ve said that a few times and I meant it, usually it’s for a personality trait that is un-guy-like.

My friend Ben is a voracious book reader and so we can discuss literature, but none of the other guys read anything similar, so to me he is special and different.

LuckyGuy's avatar

Yep. I couldn’t disagree with her assessment.

bossob's avatar

They laughed at me because I was different.
I laughed at them because they were all the same.

wundayatta's avatar

Actually, this has happened numerous times. Mostly they mean that I listen to them and can share my feelings. It is stuff that seems quite ordinary to me, and yet seems to be rare in my gender. I’m never sure I should believe that it is rare, but women seem to appreciate me, and I won’t complain about that (especially since I’ve been working all my life to become a man that women would like). Like many men, I love women. Unlike most men, I actually love the traits that women often share.

blueiiznh's avatar

Yes. I actually do not want to be like “other guys” because I can only be me.

@wundayatta IMHO it is actually not as rare as you make it sound.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@blueiiznh I disagree. If you haven’t read a lot of wundayatta’s comments you may not realize how literate/ articulate he is about his feelings, which is rare in my honest opinion.

zensky's avatar

I think they always say that.

FutureMemory's avatar

It’s a line they use on us to get us out of our boxer shorts.

Don’t fall for it, guys. Be strong.

burntbonez's avatar

@KNOWITALL Perhaps it is a regional thing, and is less rare from wherever @blueiiznh comes from.

wundayatta's avatar

@blueiiznh I hope you are right. I fear @KNOWITALL is right.

zensky's avatar

I hope @FutureMemory is right.

KNOWITALL's avatar

@wundayatta I usually am thus my moniker….lol

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@FutureMemory So she wasn’t interested in my mind at all?

downtide's avatar

Yes. I tell them it’s because I was raised to be a woman.

FutureMemory's avatar

@Adirondackwannabe It was a straight up booty-call, bro. Sorry.

blueiiznh's avatar

@KNOWITALL I was not questioning that @wundayatta is like or not like other guys. I would agree he is open and articulate with his feelings as are many others here.
My comment however had to do with how rare or not so rare this is.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@FutureMemory Fortunately she’s extremely bootylicous so I’ll take it like a man, learn my lesson and get on with life. ( I saw a young woman a few years ago wearing red short shorts with “booty” on one cheek and “licous” on the other. I’ve never forgot that sight.)

blueiiznh's avatar

@KNOWITALL @wundayatta @burntbonez
To followup on the rare/common or regional. From what I have seen and read men don’t like emotional intensity or hidden tension. That kind of “drama” pushes a man away and makes him want to clam up and withdraw. In order to feel comfortable, a man needs to know that he’s safe with you. He’ll feel safe when he sees that you are in touch with your feelings and able to express them in a clear, non-judgmental way.
There is a big difference with being articulate and safe with friends or online with people versus the SO that you live with 24×7 under the same roof. From my experience it is this safety feeling along with maturity that allows for a person to be differentiated as “not like most guys”.

hearkat's avatar

All the times guys told me how my low-maintenance lifestyle and forthright personality were “refreshing”... only to have them cook up head games and drama because they’re so enmeshed in the culture – ugh.

Haleth's avatar

That line is bananas. There are billions of guys out there, and only this ONE person is different? Pshaw.

wundayatta's avatar

@Haleth Do you know billions of guys?

Haleth's avatar

@wundayatta I’ve met enough to know they’re not all alike!

wundayatta's avatar

@Haleth So you never said that to anyone. Fair enough. Other people have.

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