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GloriaEstefan's avatar

What kind of sperm would you buy?

Asked by GloriaEstefan (261 points ) January 10th, 2013

If you were looking to fertilize some eggs and didn’t have a qualified donor, what kind would you buy?

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13 Answers

CWOTUS's avatar

I’d be a seller, not a buyer.

burntbonez's avatar

Sperm from a donor that matched me as best possible.

LuckyGuy's avatar

I’m neither a buyer nor a seller. But I’ll answer anyway.
I’d buy from the smartest, non-drug taking guy I knew. I’d want to see a transcript from their university. If their grades were good there is a better chance they did not do drugs nor over use alcohol.

zensky's avatar

Shakespeare said it best: Neither a borrower nor a lender be.

poisonedantidote's avatar

The only way I would be buying sperm would be to finally build some kind of super army, but with a more realistic view, I would look for health. Intelligence is not such a big deal, that is more or less random in life anyway, you would be better looking for things like no genetic predispositions to cancer, heart attack and so on.

wundayatta's avatar

This was not a hypothetical question to me. My sperm count is zero due to a blockage in the plumbing. We tried an operation, but it didn’t work and it didn’t seem like it would work. Plus it cost $10,000 every time we did it. This was 1994 or 5 or so. Back when 10K meant something.

I didn’t think I wanted to adopt because for me, I felt I really needed to be able to relate to my children. I have a hard time relating to other people’s children. They scare me.

So I thought maybe we would try a donor. We thought of my brother, but I decided I couldn’t really live with that. Our relationship is already problematic, and even though we’d set a clear expectation that it wasn’t his kid, he’d know and I’d know, and it would be weird.

Eventually, we settled on my best friend. He was my best friend for a reason. We are alike in many ways. We are of similar build. Though we don’t look alike. Still, I felt that I’d know his child and I’d be able to relate to it better than just about anyone else’s. So he made a donation, and we tried several times, but my wife never got pregnant that way.

To go to a sperm bank would have been very difficult. I would not really know who the father was, and no matter how much they tell you, they can’t tell you the things that make me recognize my children. There is no place my son could get his penchant for self-denigration than from me, and I don’t think he learned it because he started doing it before he was old enough to even know he was doing it.

And my daughter has a certain style of silliness that comes from both of us, but I couldn’t have known that because my wife never exhibited it until the stress of work had gone out of her life, which only happened a couple of years ago.

I could come up with hundreds of other examples of how I feel like I understand my children because they do things that only I understand because I do them.

We eventually did have our own kids, because the technology got better, and they could retrieve sperm from my epididymus, and put it together with my wife’s eggs while we made woozy eyes at each other in adjoining recovery beds.

Everybody makes their way through the sperm donor process in their own way. You have to decide what is important to you. Some people just want a kid. They’ll do anything to get one. We wanted a kid, but we weren’t going to do just anything—not, at least, after we tried it and it didn’t work. We were relieved that sperm donation didn’t work. It gave us the impetus to try to have our own children again.

But if I did use a donor, I think I’d want one that looked like me and had as many of my traits as possible, because I’d want to be able to look at the kid and identify with him or her and looks are a part of that. I’m sure it’s all psychological. I know plenty of people who have adopted and who love their kids just fine. Hell, I love their kids, too. But I can never see them and not know they are adopted and that means that there are things happening with those kids that their parents will never be able to understand. I don’t think I could parent that way, feeling like I didn’t understand my kids.

janbb's avatar

Intelligence and creativity would be key as well as kindness and generosity of heart – if those could be determined. Good looks would be a plus. Wonder what George Clooney is doing tomorrow night?

Actually, I did get quite a wonderful – in many ways – “sperm donor” to be my children’s father.

zenvelo's avatar

Human, if I am trying to fertilize human eggs.

When my ex and I went through infertility, I was on the high side of producing swimmers, so I never contemplated this. But I know two lesbian couples that both got donor sperm. One talked to a male couple that they liked and so they arranged for one of them to donate and be present in the children’s lives, although not financially liable. They did so because they liked the men.

The other couple went through the catalog at a sperm bank and found a man with similar physical features to one of the moms and a respectable academic background. That’s probably what I would do, keep it anonymous.

gailcalled's avatar

Organic from free-range vegans who do yoga and breath deeply a lot.

zensky's avatar

Free range vegans lol.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Usain Bolt’s sperm. I bet those swimmers are FAST!

ucme's avatar

I wouldn’t spunk my money away on any, cum what may.

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Maybe I don’t understand the question. What do you mean, what kind of sperm would I buy? Do you mean what kind of people I’d want it to belong to?

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