Meta Question

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Does favoritism play a role in this site?

Asked by HolographicUniverse (1665 points ) January 15th, 2013

I have a general question regarding this site, over the past few days I have been more frequent and have noticed that my answers rarely receive “great answer” even when they are far more informative than others. Now granted it is a subjective function I have witnessed this conistently, for the same users.

Is it possible that people play favorites here? Only read/support answers submitted by their familiar peers? Or is it really impartial and I am only imagining a pattern due to not receiving the amount of points I deem worthy?

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

269 Answers

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Members form bonds with other members, but you will still receive GAs if jellies understand and like your answers.

One thing I noticed, while reading through some of your comments, is that you seem to write a lot of run-on sentences. I saw a lot of commas where there should have been periods. Many people on this site are very anal about grammar and sentence structure, and you’re not as likely to receive GAs from them if your writing standards are not up to par.

Don’t forget, we were all noobs here at first, and we had to get to know the other jellies before we were assimilated into the community. Stick around, it’ll happen for you, too.

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

You have asked a handful of Questions. 1 has 4 “GQ” clicks. Do you know how long most users go between getting 4 “GQ“s on a question? I think you might have unrealistic expectations.

gailcalled's avatar

I do solemnly swear that I am not part of any collusion, conspiracy, cabal or junta. I act impartially and am alone, alone, alone up here on my hill in the country.

(Milo does play favorites, however, and is biased towards clear, terse, accurate and interesting writing…which is so annoying. I know he sneaks onto this site while I am sleeping or out.)

(Favoritism)

bkcunningham's avatar

GAs, @gailcalled and @WillWorkForChocolate, my favorite Jellies.

chyna's avatar

GA @gailcalled! Oh and thanks for dinner, it was fabulous.
Jessie says to tell Milo hello.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@gailcalled We know that you’ve got Milo prowling around on the hunt for GQs and GAs.

@HolographicUniverse I don’t read the answers of users I’ve known longer on here and skip over others. When I enter a lengthy thread, I read it. I try to read all of it. Personally, I stopped wondering and watching about whether my questions or answers were given any notice quite a while back. I only care when someone mentions me by name to engage in conversation.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Dude, or Dudess. You haven’t had 40 entries on here. Give it a while. And, in case you haven’t noticed, lurve sucks as currency. It and a buck will get you a cup of coffee. Except in NYC.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

D’awwwwww, @bkcunningham. What a sweet talker you are! And to think, we used to not like each other… I GA’d you just now, simply because you have “ham” in your name, and I love bacon.

syz's avatar

I have yet to see your moniker on any of the threads that I peruse.

Bellatrix's avatar

I actually think some members are more generous to new people. We like to have new members. So if you aren’t getting lurve it’s unlikely to be because you are new. I would suggest following the advice given here in terms of your writing style, but also keep your answers to the point and fairly brief. I can be a bit long-winded myself but some people (myself included) have short attention spans and skip over long answers. I haven’t gone back and analysed your responses so I can’t say whether this is a problem for you or not. Give it time. I love your name and have noticed it.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate
hm

You gave the most sensible answer yet the reason is still insensible, the structure of an answer should not be primary concern but rather the substance of it’s content. Unless the sentence formation is extremely faulted, which the moderator will make you revise if such is the case, it really is no reason to withhold points, too anal in my opinion.
I infrequently utilize this site as I am still accustomed to the answerbag layout however I joined here out of desire to discuss topics, not have my grammar corrected. This is fluther, not English class

To all others, so you are saying there is favoritism but it is reasonable? I suppose I will give it time but every excuse this far has been rather unsatisfactory from an impartial standpoint, if we are here to share and gather information then the most satisying content to these goals should be most appreciated, not who can write the best paragraph or who has been here the longest

DrBill's avatar

simple answer – yes

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

@HolographicUniverse I tried to be impartial, and invited you to compare points you have received to those received by those you consider to be favorites. You don’t seem to acknowledge I was trying to be helpful, and comparing data to data will reveal truth. How do you intend to gauge favoritism go forwards?

These thought experiments are of endless fascination to me.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@HolographicUniverse No, it’s not English class, but people still appreciate a clear, concise sentence, and are likely to skip comments that make their brain itch. Maybe you should read through the community guidelines to get a sense of what I’m talking about.

We really are trying to be helpful with these suggestions, not rude. I promise.

gailcalled's avatar

^^^Speaking of community guidelines;

“Writing Standards:

In order to use Fluther, you must meet our writing standards. Proper spelling, capitalization, grammar and punctuation are important to us.

All content must:

Use proper English (no txtspk)
Be spelled correctly
Use appropriate punctuation

While these rules may seem strict and arcane, it’s imperative to keeping the level of discourse at the highest quality.

Please give us your very best efforts, and don’t take it personally if you have a question pushed to editing to fix some typos. We’re sticklers.”

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@imadethisupwithnoforethought

I did not acknowledge because I assume you made the point you were trying to without response from me.

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

@HolographicUniverse I just assume when you say “all others” I was included having responded. No big.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@gailcalled
Yes I acknowledged this in my response above

If the submission is beyond comprehension then the entry will be pulled, I have had mine edited due to careless mistakes however that is up to the scrutiny of moderation, not an excuse for users. If it has a few miniscule errors then that should not be grounds to leave an otherwise sensible answer unacknowledged. I’d much rather not receive GAs for my answers being subpar than my grammar.

JLeslie's avatar

I give lurve to great answers with no favoritism. I give GA’s to jellies who annoy me or even who tend to have completely contrary views to mine if their answer is well thought out and interesting.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@HolographicUniverse I get that, but the biggest problem with poor writing standards is that sometimes your comment will not even be understood. If you use the wrong words, or write the sentence in a strange manner, people won’t understand your point, and they won’t bother to acknowledge the comment.

I’d also like to point out that I’ve been a member for several years, and I still occasionally write comments that get zero GAs. It happens. You can’t expect to get a GA on every comment; it’s unrealistic.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse You wrote, “To all others, so you are saying there is favoritism but it is reasonable?” I answer no. Please, read my first post again.

As for the importance of proper writing, the founders of this site decided a very long time ago high standards were important. That’s the end of that discussion. Good writing matters.

YARNLADY's avatar

I used to lurve every contribution on the questions I answered, because every contribution leads to the improvement of the site, but now I only lurve things that interest me.

Bellatrix's avatar

@HolographicUniverse we can’t give you specific reasons why your answers aren’t getting huge amounts of lurve. We can only give you ideas about why that might be. I certainly don’t think it’s because of negative favouritism against you. I did go and look at your answers on one thread and I recall you received 3 good answers for each response you made. Many other posts on that thread received 1 or perhaps 2 GAs. There were a couple that received more. One of those people has personal experience with the problem being discussed and therefore their answer has particular validity and mine which cited information that was targeted to the original member’s location. Other than that we are all guessing why people aren’t responding as you would like to your posts.

augustlan's avatar

It’s really hard to say, because each member gives out lurve according to their own standards. We’re not privy to what those standards are, and can really only speak for ourselves. One thing to know, though, is that you’re not alone in wondering why you don’t get lurve when you feel like you should. See this recent question for a discussion about just this thing.

jonsblond's avatar

oops! I haven’t done my part. I’m a newb lurver but I haven’t been on here much since the weekend. I’ll get to work and start lurvin’! please forgive me for slackin’

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate

Yes that crossed my mind but I am not saying any of this out of ignorance of my own entries, I review my work after I submit it so I am not as careless as may be believed. That being said I doubt, though I could be wrong, that any of my work is incomprehensible but I have a tendency to be too verbose and less concise than I should be and I can understand if they are skipped over due to length.

All in all I can’t disagree with you I just doubt that it generally applies to me,outside of what you read. Only time will tell, it could be that I think too highly of my own work as well.

@Hawaii_Jake your original post pertained to you personally therefore I took it as that, not really a direct answer.
I think you have the wrong idea regarding my protest on the writing standards, I am not some bloke who never proofreads or detests proper writing skills. My issue is in writing technique taking precedent over substantive submissions, there is no excuse to disregard a perfectly potent and sensible answer because they misspelled a word or forgot a comma. We accepted the TOU upon registration and should all be at least intelligent enough to create proper answers, as the guidelines say your entries will be pulled otherwise. I was simply saying that high standards should be in the information over the writing. If my entries are ever unclear I would be more than gracious to be told this therefore I can clarify my post.
@augustlan
I like that answer
Users give lurve based on their own standards, that is something that I can accept, as is the explanation by @Bellatrix
I never took it as a negative reaction to myself but rather a positive reaction to familiar members. It is perfectly fine to give lurve to friends but it is unfair to ignore unfamiliar users.

augustlan's avatar

PS: I fixed the typo in the title (favortism to favoritism) via internal edit. Hope you don’t mind.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Cont:
Personally I rarely pay attention to names on a given question, I give lurve based on the quality of answer, I like to think most others are the same. Though, for instance, if you look at the responses here some answers got GAs for saying things like “I have yet to see your moniker on anything I have answered” yet my responses have gotten 1. You see something this simple isn’t meant to be made an issue, and I am not trying to whine as something so minute, I am legitimately asking why is this.
@augustlan
I was hoping you would, by the time I noticed it was too late, I am still adjusting to typing on a touchscreen device.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

In regards to the comment, “I have yet to see your moniker on any of the threads that I peruse,” I’m the one who gave that comment a GA, because I was agreeing with the person who posted it that I have never seen you before you posted this question. That’s why that comment got a GA.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@chocolate
Fair enough

AshLeigh's avatar

I admit to having favorites, but I lurve you all the same.

bookish1's avatar

I’ve been trying to be a lurve fairy recently, and give GA’s to new jellies especially.

One reason that people might be skipping you over, if they are reading through a thread too quickly, is that you have not changed your avatar, and at first glance it looks like you might be completely unknown here, or a spammer. I’m not saying this is because of the content of your posts, but I have sometimes made these errors with other users who have never changed their avatars from a jellyfish.

Symbeline's avatar

Well it has to be said, this is a tight knit community, and some of us might be slightly sharkish around newbies, unfortunately. But you just have to give it some time. Stick around long enough, and you might not even wonder about this anymore. It’s not all about fitting in, because if it was our member base wouldn’t be so varied.

I’m a long time member, and I can go for days without any lurve. Yet, on some other days, it might go through the roof. Honestly, I have no real answer. But another thing to consider is that this site has been pretty slow lately. This is an obvious factor. (although I’ve seen a significant rise in the past weeks, which is cool)

jca's avatar

Just FYI, I am an equal opportunity lurver, and I will distribute lurve generously to all I feel are deserving of my lurve, regardless of whether they annoy the shit out of me or not.

ucme's avatar

I wouldn’t give it any gravitas, lurve is essentially meaningless crap & is dished out for a number of reasons. I give it out for anything I find interesting/funny or just plain daft, regardless of the little picture & name right next to it.

tom_g's avatar

@HolographicUniverse: “Is it possible that people play favorites here? Only read/support answers submitted by their familiar peers?”

I provide GAs to anyone who has provided a great answer. Sure, if you were to crunch the numbers, you would probably see my GAs weighted to a handful of “favorite” people. But they are favorites because they provide great answers the most often.

Many times, I give out a GA because I came into the thread to respond, and someone has already said what I had intended to say. There’s something somewhat satisfying about that. Makes me feel less alone.

jca's avatar

I think lurve goes out disproportionately to a certain few because, on Fluther, there are a bunch of regulars (maybe 20 or 30 people or so) who are on here a lot, answering and asking a few questions per day, at the minimum. Therefore, those members get a larger amount of lurve. Nothing to do with favoritism.

blueiiznh's avatar

Wow. The part of your question that got me was:
”.....I am only imagining a pattern due to not receiving the amount of points I deem worthy?”

I got all choked up over the sorrow you must feel.
Perhaps this link may help, or maybe this one.

Oh, welcome to Fluther

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Haha you remind me of the crowd at another site in which their answers consisted of nothing but sorry attempts at brownie points, they never had substance, originality, just half assed insults.

Considering that you’re not illiterate, do not take the quote out of context.
I hope semi witty remarks aren’t the cusp of your intellect.

Shippy's avatar

It’s not that important, sometimes I see fantastic answers, that I forgot to give a point. Then I will remember and go back or when reading over new answers, mark it then.

You do I guess get some members who go far back, and that is their relationship, and nothing wrong in that either. Over time, you grow a fondness for jelly’s that started the same time as you.

I think its more important to build a community, in that, try and thank people personally for a GA.I know I certainly appreciated those that have done that to me.

Otherwise it will get irritating when a person that posted a great question, thought provoking, and well thought out, plus received loads of responses got 2 GQ’s and the person who asked

“So today your day was…...” empty question box. Got 10 GQ’s that’s life.

FutureMemory's avatar

I show favoritism towards non-whiners, so I guess the answer to the original question is “yes”.

CWOTUS's avatar

@HolographicUniverse I think you missed part of the import of @WillWorkForChocolate‘s initial response.

With so many responses on so many threads, there are a number of us who do have wide, varying and general interest who read up to a certain level of “bad writing”, and then write off the response. I’m not saying that this has happened to you; I don’t recall any responses of yours, to be honest. But I will say, categorically, that when I encounter “natural” English speakers who can’t write the language, then I don’t pay much attention to the responses. And I don’t generally award GAs for “nice try, even though I couldn’t read or understand”.

I give non-native English speakers a lot more leeway when necessary. The funny thing is that most non-native English speakers seem a lot more interested in “getting it right” – and a lot of them are already there in terms of syntax and structure, they just need help with vocabulary, idiom and “special usage”.

“Appreciation” goes a long way, too.

thorninmud's avatar

I’d say most of us play favorites, whether or not we’re aware of it.

People in general aren’t very good at recognizing their own biases, so hardly anyone thinks they’re being preferential. We like to think that we award GAs strictly on the merit of the post, but we overlook the way we’re conditioned to look more favorably on answers from certain users than others. The bar of “great” moves up and down without our being aware of it.

I study my own behaviors carefully because this is a subject I find fascinating. I definitely see that when I see a post from certain users, my expectations about the quality of the post are conditioned by my past experience with that user. If I have a negative predisposition toward a user for whatever reason, it will take a pretty spectacular answer to shake me out of my bias and recognize its objective quality. Likewise, some users have given me reason to expect likeable answers, so it doesn’t take much to make me reach for the GA button.

This doesn’t sound like the way it ought to be, I freely admit, but this is pretty basic human psychology. Better to recognize it openly and accept that this is how we are.

gailcalled's avatar

^^^ What he said (and I didn’t even have to read it).

And what the guy above him said also.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

I can agree @thorninmud, @CWOTUS and @shippy said as it seems they are the most neutral, aside from augustlan and willworkforchocolate

@FutureMemory thanks for proving my point

FutureMemory's avatar

Did anyone hear a noise?

Dutchess_III's avatar

I did! It was a dog barking @FutureMemory.
Now, what was the question and what was the point of the question? Dude thinks he deserves more points than he’s getting? Do you think @HolographicUniverse is that self- centered and righteous in real life?
I’m sorry, but this question just strikes me like a five-year-old tattling….“He got MORE than me! Waaah!!”

CWOTUS's avatar

That is always my line at restaurants, @Dutchess_III.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Well @Dutchess_III

The point, should you have legitimately missed it, is that favoritism seems to play a role in lurve, whether it’s conscious or not is another question.
For instance insulting me will get you 4 points while clarifying the issue will only get me two.

Read a couple of the other answers therefore you can gain a proper understanding before you make an ass out of yourself
Just ask @Future_memory

Dutchess_III's avatar

Of course favoritism plays a role! That’s the nature of human beings! We’re leery about things we don’t know. It’s an instinct. I may be an ass but at least I’m not a cry baby.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III
My friend that is the only thing I was trying to prove! I am not crying but rather refuting the denial that is present on this thread.

It’s not a bad thing but it can be an issue, IMO, when it takes precedence over genuine answers.

Dutchess_III's avatar

So you’re absolutely certain of your intellectual superiority and you’re frustrated that we aren’t giving you the praise and adulation you feel you deserve. And you can’t figure out why.

Ela's avatar

Name calling never becomes anyone, imho. just saying

To me, it’s not so much as favoritism as it is the more active you are on here the more familiar you become with people. Friendships, bonds and connections form. Over time, some have become rather strong as a result of people sharing various personal struggles and accomplishments, disappoints and joys.

I know exactly what you’re referring to and whatever it is, I can feel it’s presence, just under the surface and not quite in focus. I’ve noticed when it’s pointed out it becomes like a white elephant in the room. It divides people. Some people get really pissy when asked about it or if it focused upon. Then there’s the ones who deny it, the ones who defend it, and the ones who don’t let it bother them.

To me it’s kind of like a kegger or a house party. Everyone’s invited but people will always group up, branch off and hang out in different areas (living room, kitchen, backyard… ).
We’re all friends at the same party, tho ; )

@HolographicUniverse It’s interesting to see how many people think you are a new member when you’ve actually been here almost a year now…

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@Ela : @HolographicUniverse has been a member here 5 months.

@HolographicUniverse I really am puzzled why you are so concerned with the number of GQs or GAs you receive. Why? It’s not as if you can take those marks and cash them in and spend them.

The only reason I can come up with is that your feelings are hurt. If there’s denial going on, as @Ela suggests, it’s that @HolographicUniverse‘s immature nature is being questioned.

Ela's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake ack! my bad (eyes)... I read it as April lol)

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake

not immaturity, I am simply an individual who likes to be acknowledged, if I joined the site to help and be informative but it’s not being appreciated then I will find issue with it.

It’s that simple, the points mean nothing but they are an indicator of acknowledgment.

@Dutchess_III haha I am beginning to like you more and more

@Ela great answer

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse, but how do you know your help and information is not being acknowledged? Suppose you answered a dire question about a serious situation in a user’s life, and it received only one GA. However, there’s no way to tell who gave you that one GA. Perhaps it was the questioner, and they appreciated your answer more than all the other answers combined. In that situation, your single GA is worth a lot.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake

I agree, yet what if far less helpful answers receive more GAs? Not only suggesting that users support those answers more but that the Asker may have also gave it a “GA”?

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse Who cares? Since we can’t know who gave the GAs or even why they were given, speculation is meaningless. It’s just my opinion, but you really are thinking about this issue too much.

This site is not like other question and answer sites such as Answerbag or Yahoo!Answers where the members’ points make a particular answer the “best” answer. The only way to tell which answer is best on this site is when the questioner takes the time to write a response stating explicitly why they appreciated a certain answer the most. That’s the best reward this site offers.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake

ah you see, that I can agree with.

But unfortunately I do care, whereas you may not, I take offense to taking time in posting my best answer but it not being acknowledged. I find it irritating to see a snide remark gain more “GAs” than a genuine answer

Speaking of answerbag, I just left because of a like reason, the difference was that inanity took priority over content.

The argument can be made that I am overthinking this but we are all here for our own incentive, the lurve is a function of that incentive.

That is one of the points of this thread, my reason for being here is to post substantive content and interact with similar individuals. The lurve is a way for users to acknowledge the merit of the answer, that doesn’t seem like the case at times therefore I questioned it.

You don’t see an issue, that is fine, I do.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

The lurve is fun, but it’s not an incentive for me to post. If you’re here to get points that don’t matter, then frankly, you’re here for the wrong reasons.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate
No, as I said above, the lurve itself is not the incentive…simply a function.

A I explained above I am here to post substantive content and interact with like minded individuals. Im basically here to help and lurve is the only indicator that this is being done my friend, if such was not true then I doubt this point system would exist.
Getting points isnt the objective, getting points indicates the objective is being met

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse And are you aware how the lurve system works including its limitations?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake

I will admit I dont, the flaw in being an infrequent member

Educate me :-) see I am not that egotistical

AshLeigh's avatar

My favorite kind of jellies are the ones who don’t call my homeboy an ass. :)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Okay, obviously the attempts to be subtle aren’t working, so let me be very blunt. All of your posts on this thread indicate that the points are the most important thing to you. You seriously need to get over it.

Several of us have tried to explain that even long-term jellies post comments that get no lurve or acknowledgement. You simply can not expect to have all comments be acknowledged or referred to. There are a lot of jellies and a lot of comments, and your expectations are just unrealistic.

What’s important is that you believe you gave a good answer. If you need confirmation from other people in order to feel that your posts here are worthwhile, then there is a deeper, underlying issue with you that has nothing to do with the comments themselves.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

Each user has only 100 lurve points they can bestow on any other user. Once those are used, then it doesn’t matter how many times I click on GQ or GA for your content, it will not increase your overall lurve total.

There is also a limit to how much total lurve you can earn on any given question or answer. Only the first 5 GQs or GAs count, and they only count if the person awarding the points has not maxed out on you. So, if you get 5 GAs but all those users have given you their maximum, then your total lurve score will not increase.

This system gives incentive for old-timers to interact with the newcomers. New users are the only ones who can increase the total lurve score of the users who have been here a long time.

Dutchess_III's avatar

GA @WillWorkForChocolate. Oh, and congrats on 20K….I couldn’t find the party. :(

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III dont be so quick to say GA

@WillWorkForChocolate
Understand that it is incredibly egocentric to imply that my personal preference upon this site is incorrect or that I “need to get over it”
What you fail to realize is that this is a USER driven site so of course I expect confirmation that I am being helpful and informative, if such wasnt the case I wouldn’t spend time here, I think it’s pointless to participate on this site if your content is ignored or you receive no feedback.

I dont expect to receive recognition all the time, but when you rarely receive it then is that not motive to inquire? Haha I find it funny that an argument here is that “points dont matter” yes I keep seeing “congrats on the 20k”
I’m here to be informative, I found the lurve a good way to Indicate that I was being just that… It’s not a difficult concept to grasp

@Hawaii_Jake
Thanks for the helpful information

gailcalled's avatar

@HolographicUniverse: Needing the last word (again and again and again) will probably not garner you points, particularly when you repeat the same argument.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@gailcalled

I repeat the same argument because I dont think it’s being understood… Also because it’s an unchanging argument.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Bossy much, @HolographicUniverse? Do I need to get your permission to give a fellow jelly and Good Answer?

Dutchess_III's avatar

20K is a pretty big deal around these parts. Means you’ve been here a loooong time. And you get cheese cake. 30K you get a room in a MANSION!

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@AshLeigh

Sorry.. I did not mean to insult your homeboy, can you teach me some more slang? I wanna be “down”

Dutchess_III's avatar

Let’s lay it on the line: You are arrogant and insulting….but you see yourself as superior.

gailcalled's avatar

From a flutherer whom I would choose to be on my debating team any time.

If one person says you’re a donkey, ignore him. if 10 people say you’re a donkey, buy a saddle.”

jonsblond's avatar

I understand your point. I don’t understand why you are receiving some hate here when all you are trying to do is understand how this site works. It’s a shame. A person wants to contribute and be helpful to the site and gets treated like this. sigh…

AshLeigh's avatar

@HolographicUniverse, all I’m saying is that being a pompous asshole won’t get you very far around here, sweetheart.
I’m not trying give you a hard time, but what you said was uncalled for.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@jonsblond

People don’t take criticism well,especially if it’s an apt analysis of their (mis)behavior

@all

I’m not trying to be pompous, I dont think i’m superior, in fact I joined because I’ve heard (and witnessed) that there are great users here

I am arrogant yet not in this situation, it was simply an inquiry about a pattern I noticed

@Ashleigh
So I won’t get far for being an asshole? Why should my personality matter instead of my content? ;-)

AshLeigh's avatar

Does your personality not reflect in your answers?

Dutchess_III's avatar

Your personality shows in that you come in here, start insulting people that you don’t even know, but expect us to respect you.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Personality doesn’t necessarily reflect in my answers.

Example, on a thread like this? Yes because it has become somewhat personal

On a genuine discussion topic? No, because there is no need.

See, I dont say these things mindlessly, if I thought I was wrong I would have submit long ago

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III

If you scroll up, I insulted noone

I proposed that favoritism plays a large roll in lurve, I called someone an ass for their bandwagon despite being unclear on the conversation

Dutchess_III's avatar

We would all be here even if points weren’t given. Would you?

AshLeigh's avatar

Calling Future and Dutchess both an ass might be taken as an insult.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Jus mebee, @AshLeigh! And being sarcastic to you ”...teach me some more slang.” could be construed as a snide remark. Jus mebee.

jonsblond's avatar

@AshLeigh @HolographicUniverse was civil until @FutureMemory subtly called him/her a whiner. just sayin’.

Dutchess_III's avatar

@jonsblond he IS a whiner!

jonsblond's avatar

@Dutchess_III I hope you are joking, because I don’t see it. All I see is a bunch of bullying behavior from adults because someone fairly new asked a question about the users of the site.

AshLeigh's avatar

But what did Dutchess do to deserve it?

Ela's avatar

Awesome answers @jonsblond

I’ll reread the thread but in all honestly, I don’t think anything the OP has said has been uncalled for…
He has been misunderstood, called names, down right attacked and ganged up on throughout this thread imho and has remained true to his stand. Not easy under the circumstances. Hazzah for standing your ground @HolographicUniverse ; )

I’m out because these threads usually always end the same way…

Dutchess_III's avatar

Ok. ‘Splain this line to me @HolographicUniverse. What exactly does ”...due to not receiving the amount of points I deem worthy…” mean?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@jonsblond I am truly not trying to be a bitch or hate on @HolographicUniverse. I tried explaining the “ways of the lurve” several times, yet he continues to gripe about it, which indicates to me that he doesn’t care to take advice on how to improve his chances of getting GAs, he just wants to complain “Whaaaaa why don’t I get more points?”

My main issue with his asking this question stems from the fact that he has been a member for five months, has asked 5 questions and given 59 comments total in those 5 months, has never been previously seen by many jellies, myself included, but is whining about not receiving GAs. My other issue, which I tried explaining to him, is that a comment that is poorly worded will likely not receive a GA because people will skip it.

I went through a lot of his comments and many of them are hard to understand, simply because of sentence structure and his misuse of words. There have even been a few comments on this thread that were difficult to decipher because of his strange word usage.

But he doesn’t seem to care about that, and instead becomes belligerent over this “not being English class.” The problem is that if someone can’t understand what you’re saying, then you’re not going to get a GA for it. Period.

Through my multiple attempts at explaining all of this, he just continues to argue that he isn’t garnering as many GAs as he thinks he deserves, and to me, that just boils down to, “I want more lurve points” not “I’m trying to understand how this site works.”

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@jonsblond
Exactly, thank you to you and @Ela for actually being impartial and acknowledging what others seem oblivious to.

@Dutchess_III
You took that quote out of context my friend, I asked was my implication accurate or was I “imagining a pattern..”

It is not my fault that others took this question as offensive or“whining” (even in light of them blatantly verifying that favoritism plays a role while trying to justify it)

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate

Did I not address each of those points above? Point to an example and I will willingly clarify , those points are valid, yet I seen none present in my case

Dutchess_III's avatar

OK. Here it is in context: “Or is it really impartial and I am only imagining a pattern due to not receiving the amount of points I deem worthy?” Why do you figure that you deem yourself to be worthy of more points than you’ve gotten?

Dutchess_III's avatar

There isn’t anything to justify! Yes, there is favoritism here. It just isn’t working in your favor right now, and you have a problem with that.

AshLeigh's avatar

No one sees their own faults.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III
Lets use an example

If a user asks a question about the neurophysiological effects of methamphetamine

You say “it gets you high”
And I answer a little more in depth like “it shrouds the angular gyrus, constricts cholecystokinin” but your answer receives more GA, is this not an issue? Should I not deem myself worthy of more points?

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@HolographicUniverse You addressed the fact that I wrote them, but essentially blew them off. If you refuse to accept any of the given advice, then we can’t help you.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Probably you would not get a GA for that answer because no one knows what you’re talking about. You give the impression that you are trying to impress everyone with how smart you are. You don’t get GA’s for that.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

In the words of @HolographicUniverse :

”...due to not receiving the amount of points I deem worthy?”

“Unless the sentence formation is extremely faulted, which the moderator will make you revise if such is the case, it really is no reason to withhold points, too anal in my opinion.”

“I’d much rather not receive GAs for my answers being subpar than my grammar.”

“It is perfectly fine to give lurve to friends but it is unfair to ignore unfamiliar users.”

“Haha you remind me of the crowd at another site in which their answers consisted of nothing but sorry attempts at brownie points, they never had substance, originality, just half assed insults.”

“Read a couple of the other answers therefore you can gain a proper understanding before you make an ass out of yourself”

“I am simply an individual who likes to be acknowledged, if I joined the site to help and be informative but it’s not being appreciated then I will find issue with it.”

“But unfortunately I do care, whereas you may not, I take offense to taking time in posting my best answer but it not being acknowledged. I find it irritating to see a snide remark gain more “GAs” than a genuine answer”

“What you fail to realize is that this is a USER driven site so of course I expect confirmation that I am being helpful and informative, if such wasnt the case I wouldn’t spend time here, I think it’s pointless to participate on this site if your content is ignored or you receive no feedback.”

That’s the kind of stuff many of us are finding objectionable, @jonsblond.

gailcalled's avatar

(@jonsblond: Take a two-second breather and check your PMs.)

jonsblond's avatar

@HolographicUniverse is only pointing out the obvious. Bullshit answers often get more attention (GA’s) than helpful ones. A long-time user by the name of JohnPowell often whines gripes about this little known fact of Fluther, yet no one gives JohnPowell a hard time about it. It’s a discussion about lurve, which happens to be a part of Fluther, but if anyone dare ask about it, especially if they are a new member, they are immediately called names.

I’m out guys. Have fun. I’ve got a b-day party to enjoy.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I don’t recall JohnPowell whining about it….do you have a question I could refer to? (I can’t help but notice that many of my answers here DIDN’T GET A GA AND I AM OFFENDED!!!! Damn you ALL! Except Auggie.)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@jonsblond Maybe not, but I do take johnpowell and another jelly to task every time they whine that the mods are out to get them. The OP’s attitude on this thread reminds me of that.

And ooh, ooh! Whose birthday? Have a great time!

Dutchess_III's avatar

There is a difference between a long-time contributor occasionally whining about things on Fluther, and a brand new person whose first contribution is to whine about the site.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Plus I wish he’d take off @YARNLADY‘s clothes and get some of his own!!

jonsblond's avatar

@Dutchess_III That’s just it, he wasn’t whining, he was asking and discussing. New people are always accused just for asking a freakin’ question. I seriously need to go and decorate a cake. bye now.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I think it’s poor form for anyone to say they felt they deserved more points than other people, and that’s exactly what he’s saying. It’s childish. Can I have some cake when you’re done, @jonsblond?

Symbeline's avatar

@jonsblond Well, that is true. I might write an answer that just says ’‘fuck fire’’ and get 12 GA’s. But if I write some big serious thing, sometimes I wonder if it even gets read at all. But because lurve seems so random and is perceived, awarded or withheld by different people for different reasons, at least as far as I can see, I never gave too much mind about it.

@HolographicUniverse may or may not be right about lurve solely being an indication of a post’s merit, but I don’t see it like that. I mean there’s no ’‘rule’’ about it in the guidelines; only give lurve for so and so reason, otherwise we banhamm0rz ur a$$. In any case, in my answer I wasn’t insulting or bashing him.

@HolographicUniverse Probably @thorninmud has a good point. In fact I’m inclined to agree with this. But in that point alone, people are going to have their own reason to dish out lurve to who, and to what. In that respect, you’re probably not any different, since you believe you deserve lurve on some things, while another user believes someone deserves lurve on something else. So, if lurve IS what you believe it to be, then people are still going to find their own reason, and merit, about it. Yes, there are probably a few forms of favoritism here, I just don’t personally think that’s the entire reason behind it. Because if that were the case, I don’t understand, on that point alone, why I get the lurve I do or DON’T get some lurve on certain answers.
What I’m saying is, you can’t expect to get lurve for things you deem worthy of all the time, since the handling of lurve seems so random, sporadic even.

But people saying it’s arrogant that you think you deserve lurve on certain things IS understandable, and it isn’t a favoritism issue; If I said that, I’d receive the very same treatment, I’m sure. whether or not one should act this way is not my point here, my opinion of such is not present

augustlan's avatar

I would really appreciate it if we could stop insulting one another. That’s just not necessary, guys! Bottom line: Everyone has their own reasons for giving lurve, and everyone has their own opinions about what lurve means (or doesn’t mean) to them.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Enjoy that party @jonsblond

@everyone else

Guys, this really was a simple question, the fact that our thread has gone this long only validates that you are insulted at my audacity to criticize an aspect of the site I find flawed

This isn’t about how “smart” anyone is, I am not perfect and I can agree with chocolate’s points, I didn’t blow them off, I acknowledged and dismissed them in a general sense.

Dutchess said I wont get Ga for trying to impress with smarts
@AshLeigh said I wont get GA for being an asshole
Others say I wont for “whining”
@Willworkforchocolate
Said I wont get GA for incomprehensible posts, whether grammatical or in structure.
All of these points were simply justifying the fact, the question was does favoritism play a role, it was verified that it does.

Symbeline's avatar

@HolographicUniverse Guys, this really was a simple question, the fact that our thread has gone this long only validates that you are insulted at my audacity to criticize an aspect of the site I find flawed

Nah don’t worry about that, a lot of threads here get uber long, for various reasons. (granted, religion and politics will usually do it, but I digress)

The site ISN’T perfect, and I also have my beef with certain things and how it works. But overall, I think it kicks ass. But nothing can ever be perfect, in the end it will come down to if it’s for you or not, just like most online communities, I guess.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Symbeline great answer here and I think it brings us back in to focus on the discussion topic.

Lurve is a tool to be used subjectively,my issue is that I disregarded (or rather wouldnt accept) this fact based on my opinion that one should give lurve the way I would.

I find it flawed that something like “don’t insult my homeboy” would get more GA than thorninmud’s answer (just an example)
I will state again, that was my on

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@HolographicUniverse Blowing my advice off is the same thing as “dismissing it in a general sense.” And no, I’m sorry, but a lot of the points we tried to make were not justifying favoritism, they were seriously trying to explain why some of your comments haven’t received GAs.

I will apologize for not having previously asked: is English your first language?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate
Oh that’s cute

That’s the thing, I said I doubt your explanations applied to me, if you disagree then I asked above to give me an example and I will gladly clarify. I dismissed them because maybe your points pertained to one or two of my posts… That does not account for those that were perfectly coherent yet the same thing occured.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

That’s “cute?” I was being perfectly serious. If you refuse to accept that you misuse a lot of words, and write too many run-ons (which makes it hard to read your posts) then that’s on you. I’m sorry if that hurts your feelings, but I’m not saying it to be rude. I keep bringing it up because it’s a huge factor in whether or not your comments are going to be acknowledged as often as you’d like.

So I asked if you’re a native English speaker, because if English is your second language, it would explain a lot.

Ela's avatar

@WWfC ”... it would explain a lot…” What exactly would it explain? His replies make perfect sense to me. What does that “explain” about me?
Please don’t answer… this time I definitely out.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Well, I’ll answer anyway, for anyone else who could possibly be confused by what I said. If English is his second language, it would easily explain why his sentence structure can be confusing, and why he misuses words.

All I can see here is the OP complaining that he doesn’t get enough lurve, others honestly trying to explain why that might be, and the OP refusing to accept good advice and making some belligerent remarks yet still complaining that he doesn’t get enough lurve. The the butthurt party begins…

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Not exactly, anyone’s sentence structure could/will be flawed without giving proper attention to how they type/write (ironically enough, how you see me type is how I typed when I Aced my English class ;-))

As far as misusing words, I have seen that nowhere but i’m sure if you studied my grammar effectively you’d find a few discrepancies. However, I doubt these discrepancies are dramatic enough to make a user misunderstand my posts

Instead of ignoring them and not asking for clarification, how about you take into consideration English may be a second language or that they weren’t paying attention therefore can they address the unclear statements.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Since you’re apparently so keen on me providing examples, I’ll take the time to mention one example: this comment was bumped back for editing because it was very poorly worded. I know this, because I remember seeing the original comment and thinking, “WTF???”

And claiming that you have seen no problems with your posts indicates that either you are not a native English speaker, or that you are simply in denial. That is why I asked if English is your first language. I wasn’t doing it to be “cute” or sarcastic. I asked because, as I said before, it would explain a lot.

Also, if English is your first language, then you should know that “blowing them off” is the same thing as “dismissing them in a general sense.”

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Not in denial, but simply confident in my communication skills.
That comment was rightfully bumped back to editing, considering that is done to incoherent comments can you provide an example of some more that might have been missed?

You’re generalizing my posts based on one or two examples that hardly indicate anything past me being inattentive to details. As I said before, your argument is like American English Scholars criticizing the works of Goethe because his grammar was subpar.

Sure you pointed out a few flaws in one post but were these flaws consistent enough to draw such a conclusion as you have here? No

That’s why I can’t agree with you because, in GENERAL, it does not apply to me… If it did,I would seek out your help to type my every response :-)

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

No, I’m not going to waste my time linking more of your past comments, because you would only keep arguing that you don’t see a problem. You didn’t even bother to answer me when I asked if English is your first language, and I’m tired of beating my head against a wall when you are obviously not going to listen to what anyone has said.

I wish you luck with whatever it is you’re hoping to achieve here.

ucme's avatar

I like meatballs & ice-cream, but not necessarily on the same plate.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate

Yes, if I dont see the problem I will tell you

Right now you’re simply grouping my posts collectively, you saw a flaw in one comment and expected it to be consistent therefore validating your argument

The bottom line is the miniscule issue you’re using as a basis for your argument is not pertinent to our conversation, IMHO

I asked for a link to see an example, or examples, of your comment above

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I saw flaws in many of your comments, but I linked to one in particular. I don’t think you understand the way this works; I don’t have a magic link where I can quickly list all of your comments and the details of the mistakes. I would have to link your comments one by one, and explain what I mean, one comment at a time. I simply do not have the inclination to do so, nor the time to waste on something like that.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse Here is a post of yours from this thread which I will correct:

@WillWorkForChocolate
hm
You gave the most sensible answer {A comma is needed here to divide the independent clauses.} yet the reason is still insensible {Incorrect usage of the word. “Insensible” means imperceptible, insentient, or unconscious. The correct word here would have been “nonsense.”}, {This should have been a period marking the end of the sentence.} the {“The” marking the beginning of a new sentence.} structure of an answer should not be primary concern but rather the substance of it’s {This should not have an apostrophe making it the possessive form of the word it.} content. Unless the sentence formation is extremely faulted, which the moderator will make you revise if such is the case, it really is no reason to withhold points, {The words “which is” are needed here. Either that or do some other punctuation and capitalization and make a new sentence.} too anal {A comma is needed here.} in my opinion.

I infrequently utilize this site as I am still accustomed to the answerbag {Capitalization is needed for this word.} layout {A period is needed here to end the sentence.} however {This word should be capitalized to mark the beginning of the new sentence, and it should be followed by a comma.} I joined here out of desire to discuss topics, not have my grammar corrected. This is fluther {“Fluther” should be capitalized}, not English class

To all others, {This should be a colon not a comma} so you are saying there is favoritism but it is reasonable? I suppose I will give it time {A comma should be inserted here to divide independent clauses} but every excuse this far has been rather unsatisfactory from an impartial standpoint, if we are here to share and gather information {Another comma is needed here, to divide different halves of the if/then statement} then the most satisying {Misspelled: it should be “satisfying.”} content to these goals should be most appreciated, not who can write the best paragraph or who has been here the longest {A period is needed here to end the sentence.}

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Insensible -lack of meaning or unintelligible. Unmindful
Synonym = senseless

Now that the rest of the errors are in punctuation, and slight grammar
If we are to leave it without correction, would it be hard to understand? Those errors are so minor the moderator did not catch them. It takes a single minded person to say “I cant understand that because fluther isnt capitalized and there are no apostrophes)
I suppose my next question should be does style matter over content on this site. I understand the desire for clarity and proper sentence structure but if I am to focus more on the writing than the message then I agree fluther will not be for me.

The funny thing is that someone stated that fluther has high standards, these standards can be seen in grammar but not in giving lurve?
We can give points to “I eat boogers” because it’s spelled correctly but skip over an informative posts on why we eat boogers because of misplaced commas?

Am I the only one who gets my point or is every other person also fixated on my grammar?

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Would you fucking let it go and get a life.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

P.S.

English is my native language, most errors occur because I am typing on a touchscreen and neglect to take the time to fix errors, as my friend @Hawaii_Jake just did

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse You wrote, “these standards can be seen in grammar but not in giving lurve?” Why are you fixated on meaningless lurve?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Adironackwannabe

Haha my friend, to tell someone to get a life is funny considering you came on a thread with 125 responses, none pertaining to you, only to be insulting…. Was it worh it?

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

P.S. I am glad you saw that I was not correcting that out of malice, and I would like to know what dictionary you got that definition from.

Response moderated (Personal Attack)
HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake

We’ve shifted through many arguments on the thread… The lurve was in question since the beginning… It has a meaning (that I mentioned above) even though the points are meaningless in essence.

I was making a point
Above we mentioned that favoritism plays a role because of familiarity (and what not)

That being said @symbeline said he could say anything and get GA but a thought out answer wouldn’t

We agreed that giving lurve is a subjective activity
@WillWorkForChocolate said I dont get GA because of my improper grammar, it was said because moderators have high standards

My point in all of this was that we have high standards in forming a sentence but not in giving lurve? Why is that if lurve is supposed to reflect high standards in
content?

@Hawaii_Jake

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/_/dict.aspx?word=insensible

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse You asked, “My point in all of this was that we have high standards in forming a sentence but not in giving lurve? Why is that if lurve is supposed to reflect high standards in content?”

We’ve come full circle. I think this has been answered many times in this thread in many different ways. There are as many answers as there are jellies (what users on Fluther fondly call each other).

My answer is that it’s unknowable. Humans aren’t rational animals. All I can do is shrug and ask you to stick with us a while. Answer some questions. Ask some others. Make yourself part of the collective, and before you know it, you’ll find a niche.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake

Always a pleasure to spar with users like you… I’m kind of saddened that this is the end of the conversation (probably for everyone involved as well)
Hopefully I ‘m wrong and @Dutchess_III
Shows up again :-D

Dutchess_III's avatar

You missed me! :) I was at the lake. Which is really, REALLY low. It was depressing.

It’s a simple fact that people who are liked, people who have good social skills, are going to get more things than rude, hateful, arrogant people. That’s the fact, Jack. Homeboy. I have a feeling that there are a LOT of times in your life when you don’t get what you think you deserve….and probably DO deserve…but it was given to someone else instead simply because they were easier to get along with. It’s bummer and we’ve all experienced it, but you have to shrug your shoulders and go on…and try to learn from it.

Bellatrix's avatar

So, I have a Black Forest Gateaux – have we finished dissecting the lurve system? Can we now all share a piece of cake and a drink? Or should I come back later?

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@Bellatrix Is that an invitation for some nekkid Black Forest cake? I’ll have a cuppa of your finest afternoon tea and a slice of that lurvely cake…er…gateaux thingy.

Bellatrix's avatar

Of course nekkid! We might drop cream or chocolate :D Kettle’s on.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

I cant enjoy the cake yet, not until I get a few.GAs

…Right now i’m on “0” :-(

@Dutchess_III i’m not that arrogant am I? I thought everyone on this thread likes me except @Adirondickwannabe

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@HolographicUniverse I don’t dislike you. I just can’t stand whiners.

Dutchess_III's avatar

And @WillWorkForChocolate. She doesn’t like you either. BUT that can change.

Are you ready to get nekkid and eat cake and cuppa @HolographicUniverse??!! I’m not getting nekkid.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Why did “sorry mods” get two GAs? Genuine question

@WillWorkForChocolate will come around… Women, except augustlan, are naturally drawn to me :-D

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

@HolographicUniverse It got 2 GAs, because @Adirondackwannabe is genuinely sorry. It also more than likely got 2 GAs from other old time jellies who know that giving him the GAs will not add to his total lurve score. Their clicks on GA are meaningless. They’ve maxed out on him.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

I’m done with this entire thing, unless pancakes and nudity are involved.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WilWorkForChocolate

… Thats the only thing we agreed on this entire thread! A woman who likes nudity and pancakes is a keeper ;-)

Dutchess_III's avatar

I gave him a GA because I’m sorry too. I just didn’t want there to be an echo in the room.

And Heading for pancakes but keeping my cloths on, don’t ya know!

AshLeigh's avatar

Dutchess, you can’t truly enjoy pancakes with your clothes on. I’ve tried.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Then I won’t have pancakes! I will have…Quiche. :)

AshLeigh's avatar

So now you’re telling me you’re going to come to a Nekkid pancake party with clothes on, and you’re not going to eat pancakes?

blueiiznh's avatar

what a waste of a good pancake and invitation…

Dutchess_III's avatar

I think I’ll just sleep in!

Dutchess_III's avatar

This seems appropriate.

gailcalled's avatar

(Last dozen or so answers are making @HolographicUniverse‘s thesis much more plausible.)

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@gailcalled

I want users to take note of your comment because it is supported but virtually every recent comment above.

You and I rarely agree but that was spot on

gailcalled's avatar

^^^Still watching this thread like a hawk, are you? You haven’t been here nearly long enough to state that “you and I rarely agree.”- Learn from experience and go do something more productive.

josie's avatar

They do indeed play favorites. All the bitching on earth will not stop it. It is a tough lesson to learn. But at the end of the day, play along or or move on.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Josie fair enough

@gailcalled

I don’t know what to make of you, you point out something that we both agree on then you insult me for agreeing? The word “bandwagon” will forever be mentally associated with your name

Response moderated (Personal Attack)
Response moderated (Personal Attack)
Dutchess_III's avatar

She is saying you haven’t been in enough discussions with her to know whether you two “rarely” agree. She wouldn’t have made the comment if you’d simply said, “I’m glad we agree.”

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III
good explanation, if only it were true
Her comment stated more than “you havent been here nearly long enough to say that”, as you can see there was a negative tone… Thats what I was referring to

chyna's avatar

@HolographicUniverse
That’s the thing about reading, you can’t read a tone.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Haha I was referring to the latter portion of her comment, though the comment overall was obviously negative… Take off the shades, you’ll see better :-)

Ela's avatar

Last word!! dun matter what any^^one^^else^^ says…
I’m dibbin’ the last word.
Nanny… nanny… boo… boo : P

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@HolographicUniverse Just a friendly tip: you will never make friends here by arguing with everyone about everything. Sometimes you just have to let things go. This would be one of those times.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate

The thing is… I never planned to make friends darling, I could be the most loved or most hated, I will still be honest and argumentative if I feel I am correct. Same thing with any other discussion I am a part of…. But alas you are right :-) , and so are you @Ela

Ela's avatar

You’re that kid that does the “I’m not touching you, I’m not touching you” aren’t you!?

@HolographicUniverse i’ll play wiff you later. i’m not that bored atm n have stuffs to do. : )

blueiiznh's avatar

@HolographicUniverse I suspect you have found the root answer to your original question by now. I would not necessarily call it favoritism, but more reflecting an agreeable position with the person that posts. There is quite a difference in giving a GA for favoritism than there is agreement.

While is rarely disagree with @chyna, I do think there is a tone carried in written word. Tone (or Voice) is the feeling or attitude that comes through in an author’s words.
In that regard, I think people are hearing your tone loud and clear. Welcome to Fluther.

Buttonstc's avatar

Holy crap ! What a thread.

Dutchess_III's avatar

I think you can hear tone in the written word, to a certain extent. But it can also be misheard, too. When @gailcalled pointed out that he hadn’t been here long enough to know whether they usually agreed with each other or not, I read it as a mild observation. @HolographicUniverse read it as a negative rebuke. And argued with the comment, saying it wasn’t true! Which was a really ridiculous comment considering he’s a newbie. I can tell you that @gailcalled and I agree about 75% of the time….but we’ve been hanging out together on this site for almost three years.

gailcalled's avatar

@Dutchess_III: Only 75%? I would have sworn it was 77%.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III

Actually I don’t believe I said it was untrue if re read my comment, you simply misinterpreted it.

In regards to not being here long enough, @gailcalled and I have participated on this thread for a while now… Judging by many of her comments we DO NOT agree, it’s that simple, I’ve also read some of her other material.
It’s foolish to say since I joined 5 months ago that I havent been here long enough to say we rarely agree because I could have been here 2 years without knowing of her content whereas this one thread has given significant insight

Dutchess_III's avatar

@gailcalled—It’s actually 75.999999, see.

No, this one thread really hasn’t given you significant insight to any of us.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Out of 180 responses on this thread I have disagreed with many of statements, as was the validation of my statement

Im done here

gailcalled's avatar

@HolographicUniverse: If I understood what you meant by “as was the validation of my statement” in this sentence, ” I have disagreed with many of statements, as was the validation of my statement,”
I could decide whether to disagree or agree.

ucme's avatar

I shall name this thread Mickey Rooney, for it refuses to die…god bless her & all who sailed in her :¬)

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@gailcalled

I have disagreed with many posts in this entire thread (many of yours) as was the basis of my initial statement (we rarely agree)

That simple
@ucme at least i’m a bit more popular than I was before this thread haha

ucme's avatar

@HolographicUniverse My kind of person, glass is always half full :¬)

Dutchess_III's avatar

You two don’t see eye to eye on the subject of this thread. You don’t know whether you’d agree with her or not if we were discussing something else.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III
We’ve been active on another thread or two, I also check her content (as I have with others here) I dont say these things in biased manner, I say them because they are true

Bellatrix's avatar

@HolographicUniverse this thread is doing something for your reputation, I don’t think it’s increasing your popularity.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Bellatrix

I was being sarcastic in regards to popularity (though I am sure I will be more recognizable)

What this thread does is proves what I proposed initially

Dutchess_III's avatar

It proves that there is favoritism on this site? Well, duh! We’ve all agreed there is from the beginning. You didn’t do anything special by posting this.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III
Nothing special was intended to happen, I asked a genuine question which gained a critical response to something that was true regardless, therefore what was the point in antagonizing me?

Paradox25's avatar

I feel that the moderators do a good job on here, but many users do have biases, and this is not just unique to fluther as I’ve learnt the hard way from being on several other sites. I’m certain there are a few users (I’m not claiming most but a few) who will either not lurve me, or lurve me rarely even when I know they likely would had agreed with my answer. I suspect this could be because I had the audacity to debate in favor for the existence of a creator or because I see the need for men’s rights organizations as well since I don’t buy the male ‘privilege’ talking points spoken of by many feminists.

Yes, there are some users who are that juvenile on here, but my suggestion to you would be to just be yourself and continue posting on here as you would. Writing questions like this just fuels the egos of those angering you even more. I used to take this site seriously, and I’m still generally here to post serious questions/responses but I’m not going to lose sleep over it.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Paradox25

What bothers me most is not losing “lurve” but that this juvenile behavior plays a factor at all. I left another site because the childlike and inane behavior became so unbearable and heard this was a nice alternative… I expected for good answers to be revered regardless of favoritism or personal bias but that doesn’t seem to be the case

gailcalled's avatar

@HolographicUniverse” In order for an answer to be revered, it must be reverential. That does depend on both style and content; bullying someone to unsnarl prose in order to extract the nugget of information is not productive.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@gailcalled
True yet I dont see how the latter is pertinent…

I dont agree that it should depend on style but rather content so long as the “nugget of information” is easily obtained

CWOTUS's avatar

The way you’re snapping at users here makes me think you won’t be hanging around here too long, either, @HolographicUniverse.

Sometimes when it seems that the whole world is against you it’s time to question yourself, not the whole world.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Has it occurred to you that there are users who don’t think your answer was a good answer so they didn’t give you the point?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@CWOTUS
Snapping? No… Defending my opinion? Yes, I would not argue with the majority if I was not convinced that I am correct

Furthermore it’s not a matter of right or wrong here…. But me addressing any points users may have, as you see above I have agreed with others (Hawaii_Jake, you, williworkforchocolate) if they made a point I cant refute

Dutchess_III's avatar

You are correct. There is bias here. The majority agrees with you, so you don’t need to argue any more.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III
So because I am replying to posts i’m arguing?

jonsblond's avatar

@HolographicUniverse Didn’t you get the memo? It’s true. If you reply to users who answer your own question, it’s considered arguing.~ :)

Dutchess_III's avatar

I don’t think anyone is arguing the point. They are arguing the form. They are wondering why it is so important to you, anyway.

Dutchess_III's avatar

Also, FYI, unlike Facebook we can’t see who gave who points, so your comment ”...as you see above I have agreed with others..” is moot.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@jonsblond
Haha duly noted, that memo makes perfect sense ;-)

@Dutchess_III
I was referring to where I blatantly state “I agree” in my responses (which you can see above) you just stated the obvious…. It sort of indicates YOUR desire to argue not mine.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

<runs naked and screaming through the room>
“FREEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!”

blueiiznh's avatar

let the streaking begin

Dutchess_III's avatar

I misunderstood you @HolographicUniverse. Sorry ‘bout that!
PUT YER CLOTHES ON ETHEL!!!

HolographicUniverse's avatar

I have a new question

Is this the longest thread in fluther’s database? if not what is?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Haha what the f*ck? Why was it closed and why were those responses moderated? Someone enlighten me

jonsblond's avatar

Astrochuck has the longest with over 2000 responses. It’s a song title game (and takes a long time to load).

jonsblond's avatar

http://www.fluther.com/28533/who-wants-to-play-the-song-title-game/

with 2627 responses (I think that’s the number of responses. I don’t want to load it again to recheck the number.)

Ela's avatar

My god… it just goes on and on and on and on and on and on…..........

blueiiznh's avatar

@Ela reminds me of a childhood backseat game of “stop touching me, stop touching me, stop touching me”

Dutchess_III's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate LOLL!!! I’d forgotten about that! I read the answers before they all got redackted!

What about this one, guys…passed our one-year anniversary in June, 1786 responses.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Ela

I do believe there is a “stop following” button that you are more than welcome to take advantage of :-)

Dutchess_III's avatar

Wait…what about the frizzer??

blueiiznh's avatar

^^what she said

Buttonstc's avatar

Holy crap ! (...again…)

Dutchess_III's avatar

‘crap’ is a bad word. Except in this case.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

? How did a comment with literally no response get 3 GA? Thats ridiculous

AshLeigh's avatar

Because her silence says it all :)

augustlan's avatar

Also, it’s not easy to post an empty response here. There’s a trick to it, so it’s kind of funny.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@AshLeigh
Her silence says more about her than anything else

@augustlan I guess…

Dutchess_III's avatar

Yes, her silence does just that..

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III

Do you have anything to say that is actually conversation worthy?

Dutchess_III's avatar

Do you not understand what she meant by her silence?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Dutchess_III
I did not pay attention, seems like an inside joke if anything, nothing noteworthy

Dutchess_III's avatar

Not really. It’s right in front of you. I’ll give you a hint: The score is 6009 to 855.

PhiNotPi's avatar

Second, I say that favoritism is not a big factor on this site. Favoritism would mean that people give lurve to friends based on previous activity regardless as to the actual content of that post.

However, we are very guilty of voting up “joke” replies that we think are funny, or sarcastic comments. It’s not that we are voting for particular people, but we place unneeded weight on particular types of comments.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Fluther is full of so many delightful members… I think I’ll just give up my individuality and mindlessly agree with everything the long standing members, with 6000+ points, say therefore I can belong to the list of favorites :-)

The best part is that I wont have to post anything meaningful, I can say things like “you’re an asshole homebrew” and get points

augustlan's avatar

Well, if you say “You’re an asshole”, it’ll get modded as a personal attack. You might get some lurve for it before we remove it, but still.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

Important points in this thread:

1. Some people apparently play favorites
2. Some people don’t
3. We like humor and witty sarcasm
4. We frequently give lurve for things that make us laugh
5. Your question has been answered multiple ways
6. You keep arguing with everyone
7. You’re beating this to death
8. I have a dent in my forehead from bashing it into my desk
9. You’re still arguing
10. You’re really beginning to sound like a whiny kindergartner
11. Kindergartners aren’t allowed here

HolographicUniverse's avatar

So here’s another fun question for “jellies”

So I recently answered “how to cope with my dog’s death” (paraphrase) My answers were moderated for reasons unknown to me. Might I have an explanation?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate

If you can type you can read, I suggest you re-read some of the posts above then recant points 6–11. There’s still time to edit ;-)

chyna's avatar

Possibly because you were being an insensitive jerk with your answers. No one asked you your opinion on how someone acts, reacts or grieves when they lose a pet. Everyone reacts differently and you telling someone how they feel is unreasonable is absurd.

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

@HolographicUniverse Sorry, but unlike almost every post of yours that I have read, my above post needs no editing.

Now then, lose your crappy attitude and get over yourself. We are who we are. If you want to stay and play, then you are more than welcome to do so. If you want to keep whining about why someone got points for whatever comment, then go play with the other kids on Yahoo answers.

augustlan's avatar

Your posts in the dog thread were removed for being unhelpful and/or off-topic (in the General section).

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate
I had to give you GA…. I can only agree

@Augustlan
Unhelpful or off topic? She asked how to cope and I told her from an impartial standpoint. Her behavior is unhealthy therefore I told her…. Unlike others who advocated the irrationality. Nothing was off topic, just unpopular
@chyna losing a pet is miniscule in the grand scheme of things, she didnt lose an age old friend but simply a dog she’s had for a while…. im not insensitive…I am honest

chyna's avatar

You asked why you were modded. You were off topic and she doesn’t care what your thoughts are on her reactions to her loss of a pet.
Your opinion on weather you were off topic or not doesn’t matter. It’s what the mods think that matters.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@chyna if the mods are wrong then I should correct them. I admit to being very indecent though…

Hey another sub question, how does someone become moderator around here? Dont you think I’ll be the next augustlan? She’s so insightful

Bellatrix's avatar

@HolographicUniverse in the dog thread, the poster asked how to cope with her grief and her brother-in-law’s behaviour. She didn’t ask was her grief appropriate or was she overreacting.

gailcalled's avatar

@HolographicUniverse, As you recently said, “but emotional fixation, like you are displaying here, is unnecessary.”

The shoe fits for what you are doing on this thread also, doesn’t it?

And no, you are not being indecent to the dog owner, but insensitive, callous and showing no concern for her feelings, which is what you have been attacking all of us for.

You have written almost 25% of the answers here. A pity you can’t give yourself lurve.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@gailcalled
I was being indecent by being insensitive, I have no emotional ties to this thread but simply curiosity. I do dislike your (collective) behavior, however, as it relates to lurve and posts.
P.s. Am I not supposed to respond to every post? Or is that classified as whining and arguing?

@Bellatrix
She was being ridiculous and reacting extremely therefore causing a friction with her brother in law. I told her an appropriate period of grieving was appropriate and realizing that it is a replaceable pet (I actually said that in both posts that were moderated)As opposed to users who were advocating her feelings. Simple really.

Bellatrix's avatar

In your opinion she was being ridiculous and who may I ask are you to determine what is an appropriate period (or level) of mourning? Grief, for whatever loss a person is experiencing, is an entirely personal thing. Your posts were moderated because you did not answer the question. You spouted your own opinion based on your own feelings.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Bellatrix
Honey
Grief being personal does not negate the fact that the manner in which one grieves, or the level, can be unhealthy or even abnormal. Her ingrained affection for this animal is understandable but to regard it as highly as she has is ludicrous.
It’s like saying that using food as a coping mechanism for losing a girlfriend should be supported.
What I told her was to realize what she seemed oblivious to (which is actually a part of the technical grieving process)

P.s that was answering the question, technically saying “through an appropriate period of grieving” was answering the question…. Seems it was taken down through misinterpretation

WillWorkForChocolate's avatar

OK, guys. I vote that we all bail on this thread, otherwise he is just going to keep beating everything to death, and it will never end. He’s just going to find other things to complain about. Next thing you know, we’ll be arguing about toenail length FFS…

Bellatrix's avatar

@HolographicUniverse don’t patronise me by calling me honey. I am most certainly not your honey.

You are also not that person’s psychologist and you have no way of knowing whether her grief is or is not abnormal. There would be some who would label your apparent lack of self-awareness and sensitivity to another person’s pain as abnormal.

You didn’t answer her question. You were modded.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@WillWorkForChocolate
So maintaining stance on a certain issue is beating things to death? Did you expect me to agree with you when your argument does not convince me that I am wrong? Cognitive dissonance is not something I’ve really been a “victim” of. I vote that you bail out should you have nothing else to say.

@Bellatrix
I am sorry, it is a force of habit, I did not mean to patronize you.

Look I told her like I tell any other pet owner who becomes somewhat delusional in personifying these animals and developing such deep attachments to their pets despite the fact that they are replaceable and have shorter life spans.
I cant use analogies enough because there are many more examples of this “unhealthy” relationship that aren’t just man and dog but even man/fish, man/turtle, man/ants etc (the likes of which you would all label these people batshit crazy but it’s the same emotional attachment that she exhibits)
It is ridiculous to be so attached to a pet that you can’t fathom their passing.
It’s not like i’m telling her the passing of her grandparent was meaningless… Just the passing of a replaceable pet

Response moderated (Flame-Bait)
Response moderated
Symbeline's avatar

I think I’ll just give up my individuality and mindlessly agree with everything the long standing members, with 6000+ points, say therefore I can belong to the list of favorites :-)

You just won’t be happy until all of us agree with everything you say, will you? Frankly, you’re no better than what you accuse us of being.

chill out, homebrew

ucme's avatar

“I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.”
Roughly translated, I follow no particular pattern, for I am an individual & fiercely fucking proud of it!

FutureMemory's avatar

And I actually got flack in the beginning of this thread for calling the OP a whiner.

For those feeling the need to apologize privately, PM’s work just fine :)

gailcalled's avatar

^^^Will do, as long as the check is in the mail.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@FutureMemory
I would love for you to indicate where I was whining, whereas I still don’t see anything relevant in your posts
What I do see is someone sticking around trying to pick a fight, otherwise you could have stopped following days ago
Funny how 3 people liked your answer haha you people are ridiculous

HolographicUniverse's avatar

Oh and @Symbeline
Not a matter of agreeing, I simply stating my opinion like you yourself are doing.

Judging by what all of you agree with, I can’t fathom us seeing eye to eye

Symbeline's avatar

People can still get along even if they don’t agree on everything.

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Symbeline
And I get along with the reasonable people here who didn’t insult me for asking a question or disagreeing with their friends

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Buttonstc
I didn’t get to the end since the song was not appealing, so I just stopped listening

I believe you have that same freedom here ;-)

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

@HolographicUniverse how you enjoying fluther so far?

HolographicUniverse's avatar

@Imadethisupwithnoforethought
Aside from this thread, and a select few users, I enjoy it immensely…. I always have because I get exactly what I desired when joining this site so the good outweighs the bad. (if that was a serious question)

Imadethisupwithnoforethought's avatar

@HolographicUniverse I ask drunk questions. Don’t mean it isn’t a serious effort to discover what makes other people tick.

Ela's avatar

^^ tis true : P

Dutchess_III's avatar

It’s back! I’ve been missing this thread!

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