Social Question

Aster's avatar

Why do some women resent their s/o's poker night? (Or other game)

Asked by Aster (15835 points ) January 16th, 2013

All my life I’ve watched women on tv fuming because their s/o , even when informed previously, comes home later than normally because of a night out with the boys. I’m not talking about strip clubs or infidelity but it’s most often portrayed as simply playing cards at a friend’s house. I find absolutely nothing irritating about it and indeed would welcome it.
If you’ve noticed this in women why do you think they get so angry?

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10 Answers

bookish1's avatar

Does this really happen? I thought it was just a sitcom trope…

Aster's avatar

It happened in the movie “A Streetcar Named Desire” and I’m certain it happens outside soaps-which I never watch.-

Coloma's avatar

I think it only happens when there are pre-existing trust issues or a very jealous and insecure spouse. If the boys night out also involves stupid over indulgence of alcohol that can be a problem too. Every persons reasons and reactions would be unique to their particular situation in a relationship and both parties levels of maturity.
I used to hate it when my ex went out in my younger days because it always involved drinking too much and taking risks.

Waiting on a drunken spouse to come home safely sucks.

Shippy's avatar

I think it’s strange. I’d want my SO to have a life, have friends, go out on his own, as much as possible. I would even encourage him to sleep with other women if he wanted to. I just feel the tighter you hold a person the more you squeeze the life out of them.

Aster's avatar

^^^^^ I agree with your last sentence. lol

rojo's avatar

I have wrestled with this for years and I can tell you nothing about why my wife gets irritated when I go out “with the boys”.
Now please understand, I go out once a week. I leave at 9:30; she goes to bed at 10:00. I have done this for years. I go to the same place every time. It is approximately five minutes from my house. I meet the same guys. I have exactly two beers in that two hour period. I get home between 11:20 and 11:40 each time. She is always asleep when I get home. Yet, every Thursday I have to put up with the pouting beginning about 8:00 pm until I leave. On the plus side, she is fine Friday morning.
I have asked her and cannot get a reasoned answer out of her. I believe it has something to do with just not being with her even though she is in bed for the majority of the time I am gone.
Go figure.

Aster's avatar

I think she’s worried that at some point a woman may appear at the game. A woman you’re attracted to and she to you.

rojo's avatar

Maybe so but after 35 years of marriage and 25 years of me going out on Thursday, you would think she would get used to it.

nicole29's avatar

I think it really depends on the situation. Is she left at home with the kids while he goes out? Does she have a night where she’s able to go out with her friends, and he stays home?

I think that a decent half of it is jealousy – or fear that he’s not doing what he says.. and that there may be something else involved. I think the other half, in certain situations, may be the woman feeling like she is not afforded the freedom to do the same. (Whether this is because SHE feels that she is too busy, can’t leave the kids, etc… or whether her partner may not be approving of it)

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