What is necessary in your country or state for being culturally literate?

I’m in NJ so the cultural makup isn’t too different from MA, and I hover the line between extreme introvert and borderline Aspergers (I have a theory that we will eventually discover that the Autism Spectrum is the extreme end of the introversion/extroversion spectrum).

I don’t watch TV – that seems to be what most small talk is about. I watch sports occasionally, and pick up some from social media and radio. I listen to NPR, so I know a bit about news events. I like to go to the movies, but mostly avoid the romantic and adolescent humor films, and prefer compelling stories and characters or impressive visuals, so not many people have seen the films I’m interested in.

Fortunately, I avoid situations where small-talk is called for. When my sweetie (also an introvert) and I go out, we sit mostly silent and maybe talk about our day (if it isn’t so loud that we’d have to raise our voices to do so), or about the situation we’re in. At work, we talk about our families and work.

I would not bother.
There is no one from this planet that has knowledge in every field.
I bet the mouth breathers that look at you funny if you tell them you do not give a fuck about sports, have not the foggiest clue about science, or for example, Star Trek.
So just learn things that interest you, and try to use that in conversations, and for the things that do not interest you, just listen.

Gods, I hate small talk for just this reason.

I don’t understand football. It’s a bunch of 300 lb men in tights jumping on top of each other for three hours for a crowd that largely believes ballet is too homoerotic.

But Tampa is apeshit over this team that as far as I can tell isn’t actually good.

People spend an inordinate amount of time complaining that they can’t watch football on TV, and the team complains people won’t pay for tickets.

I’m no expert, but I think it might have something to do with building a stadium with no shade and no breeze and expecting people to pay $150+ a seat to sit in Florida sunlight for three hours to watch a sports team lose.

Hell, the baseball team has climate control and $6 tickets and can’t get people to show up.

But of course, if I mention any of this, I just ‘don’t get it’, and then they try to explain the game to me, again.

When I was growing up, I knew 3 kids from different families, who didn’t have televisions. They were all very smart, and their families were well off, and chose not to have TV’s. Those same kids did suffer from being culturally unaware, and as a result were seen as different and weird.
Now that I think of it, all 3 also ended up admiring the Nazi party.

My small town has lots of farmers & industrial estates, so as long as you know that it’s possible to run your car on cow shit, although very expensive, then you’re pretty much good to go.

There isn’t one answer. It depends on geographic location, age, and socio-economic status. There are parts of Atlanta where I would be utterly culturally illiterate (I don’t know hip-hop or rap artistry or lore), and parts of Atlanta where I would be perfectly comfortable.

This isn’t as simple a question as you think.

@elbanditoroso: “This isn’t as simple a question as you think.”

Oh, I’m clearly aware of those things, and I specifically didn’t want to ask about that. I should have been more clear. Sure, I can travel 30 minutes from here and be Mr. Social Genius by simply knowing my cheap domestic beer, Fox talking points, and the Lynyrd Skynyrd discography.

What I am asking – specifically – is what do you, @elbanditoroso, have to know at a minimum to simply “get by” and function as a social creature without alienating people or coming off as a holier-than-though snob.

If you were to make it simpler than it is by averaging some kind of cultural information that would be useful, what would it be. I suspect that I have a pretty good grasp of the stuff I should know here in the Boston area. And yes, I can tailor it based on socioeconomic, age, and other factors, but there are also things that cut across those distinctions as well.

The more people I come in contact with here that are from other places, such as the midwest, I get the impression that those places are like different countries altogether, where a completely different set of cultural norms apply. But I could be wrong. Maybe we all just try to make simple connections with people through just a few common methods or cultural themes that are expressed only somewhat differently based on location (or even maybe socioeconomic differences).

@ragingloli – I used to be ok with that. But I have young kids, and part of my job is to be able to be friendly enough with these people. When we meet up for a few minutes and they’re going on about baseball or the latest model of some car, simply listening is my only option. I’m either mute, or I start running my mouth with some crazy shit I happen to be thinking about, like free will or some crap.

What works best in social situations is being interested in people for their own sake or for what they have to say. I wouldn’t bother trying to learn about the Red Sox for example. If you meet someone who is a fan he will tell you everything anyway. Just look interested and ask a few questions.

I agree with @flutherother I just become interested in the person I am speaking with. It also takes the focus off me (as in my own focus). I suspect most people are less interested in me than themselves most of the time.

I’ve withdrawn a lot from society and media so have little idea of what is going on yet I manage to have lovely conversations when I do chat to new people. I think the key is to realize that people are just not that interested in me and I am just quite small in the larger scheme of their lives. If I were so focused on me and how I came across I think I’d suffer with social phobia.

I live in historic “Hangtown”, Placerville CA. and resided in the Coloma area for years outside of “town” here, where gold was discovered in 1848, kicking off the California Goldrush.
Up here if you do not know the local history you’d be considered an ignorant “flatlander”. lol

As long as you know a little about the KC Chiefs and Springfield Cardinals, and St. Louis Cardinals, along with a bit of bible, you’ll be fine.

Where I live it’s nothing. It is so simple to converse with anyone. This is a culture of food, clothes, church and gossip. But when you say, “culturally literate” I think of music, art, the ballet and so forth. Nobody talks about art or music who I know. Then you have the people who want to talk non-stop about their illnesses; they just want you to listen and have no interest in your illnesses. It is not high society. It’s very easy going; not a learning environment.

I can’t say if all of Québec is what I’m about to describe, Montréal sure isn’t, but this small town…

Don’t speak English. People here hate everyone who speak anything else but French. I get called a ’‘square head’’ because I speak English even though I was born in France. Go figure, both places speak the same fucking language, haha.
People in Québec seem to despise the rest of Canada, and the rest of the world. I would think that speaking two or more languages is great, but if you know more than one over here, stick to French. I think it’s so stupid, but I refuse to hide the fact that I can speak English. Fuck these people.
People here are also very sexist, homophobic, racist and xenophobic. It’s really annoying and lame, especially as I am used to big cities where people just don’t give a fuck what you are or where you come from. I can’t stand the kinds of mentalities that still think women are inferior to men. I think we can do without this kinda crap.

You have to like hockey. Being a woman, at least I can be forgiven for not liking it, but that’s insulting in and of itself. What if I DID like hockey? I wouldn’t have the mentality that which they ask for.

Don’t like Winter. Since our Winters are harsh, you have to hate the cold. Fuck that, I love Winter. At least there’s one good reason why I’m here, haha.

Watch whatever garbage cable TV throws at you, and worship it. Although that one, I figure is probably a given in any place that has cable in every home.

If you’re a man who doesn’t drink alcohol, mostly beer, you are not a real man.

Seriously, this place is pathetic. I moved here to go to school, which I did, but I had to travel from here to Montréal every day to attend. I love it over there, should have just stayed when I had a chance to snag an apartment.

I live in the Tampa Bay area now, and so far (I have been here several months) I don’t see anything significant. The people I have met are from all over the country and we have that in common. A lot of midwesterners, and my college T-shirts can start a nice conversation. I went to school at Michigan State University. So, knowing different places around the country is helpful, and being open in general. I have been meeting people mostly at my zumba class and the pool at my apartment complex, possibly I would feel differently if I were working. Although, my husband is working and he says it is more “normal” here.

We moved from the Memphis, TN area, and people overall were very congenial. Lots of religion talk though. I kind of stayed away from it for the most part. Said very little or changed the subject. With close friends we might have a religious discussion more about curiousity, never debating really. Also, most people were fairly right wing, so I avoided politics, although some people who knew I was fairly liberal sometimes purposely started things up, which annoyed me. But, there was plenty to connect with people on. The local baseball team a lot of people were into, but not a big deal if you knew nothing about it. We were part of a car club so we connected with people there. My neighbors who I got along with well weren’t from the local area. There was way more talk about race than I had ever experienced, which was frustrating. Such a big divide culturally between whites and blacks there. A nice thing was people did a lot of get togethers, pot lucks, wine tasting parties, etc. Also in TN an absence of talk about ones own lineage and the food and traditions that go along with such things. Here in Clearwater it is back to knowing people I meet are Greek or Persian or Italian and a total nonissue, we just know.

Oh, and one more thing about TN, neighbors were very neighborly and strangers were congenial, but the service often was lacking in stores and restaurants. Not the majority of the time, but enough that it was noticeable. Also, you could not be very direct or something. I never quite figured it out. People were defensive. Like if I had a problem at a store and was just basically giving feedback, not even worked up in any way or angry, they just could not handle it. Could not see it was an opportunity to improve. I just had the Best Buy here in FL really screw something up, and they handled it so well. They understood I just wanted to resolve it, I wasn’t looking to get anyone in trouble. In TN I don’t know if it was my delivery that screwed up situation all too often.

I lived in Boca Raton, FL for many years and we also all knew who was Italian, Jewish, Cuban, Colombian, didn’t matter, but we knew, and some of us spoke Spanish. People were not as friendly in some way like in TN, but sill it wasn’t very hard to make friends. Lots of people from NY there, and I was raised by NY’ers so that feels very normal to me. Religion almost never came up except to acknowledge a holiday. I don’t one person ever said they would pray for me or asked me where I go to church the 14 years I lived there, nor where I grew up in MD. In TN that happened quite a bit. In southeast FL it would be shocking to me to here someone speak out negatively about gay people or go on about negative stereotypes about any group.

You need to have a basic knowledge of Texan which includes but is not limited to, the following:

The Top National Eating Place statewide is the Dairy Queen. However, preferences may vary from town-to-town.

High school football is a religion.

Nolan Ryan is a national hero and if Texas ever secedes, Nolan’s picture will be on a piece of currency.

Willie Nelson is God.

If you don’t know the meaning of “fixin’ to” you may find it impossible to communicate with a Texan. Example: “I’m fixin’ to go git some gas.”

The Alamo is a sacred shrine and is not to be messed with.

The Texas Rangers are more popular than the Houston Astros – even in Houston.

The Dallas Cowboys will find a way to lose any game in which Tony Romo plays.

Tex-Mex food is much spicier and tastes better than Mexican food which is bland.

There are two national drinks: Lone Star Beer and Margaritas.

The economy of Texas is the 4th largest and strongest in the world.

Our Governor Rick Perry is an idiot, but the Bible-thumpers keep voting for him and electing him.

A real Texan considers Texas as a separate nation that just happens to be – for the time being – part of the United States.