Social Question

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

When will we stop talking about "the gays"?

Asked by Hawaii_Jake (25561 points ) December 21st, 2013

I am wondering when sexuality will be a non-issue.

I never in my wildest imagination thought marriage equality would happen in my lifetime, and now I have friends getting married.

Will acceptance of sexuality become commonplace in my lifetime, too?

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33 Answers

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

@Hawaii_Jake I don’t honestly know. It seems that some people will never get it. I get so discouraged some times. What does it mean to mean that someone thinks differently?

Seek's avatar

I think it will happen with this generation – the ones that are more interested in Apple vs. Android than straight vs. gay or black vs. white.

I’m still pretty young-ish – 28 in a few days – and I remember being the only kid with an email account or any interest in computers. Now, it’s commonplace for people to make friendships and even begin to have romantic feelings for each other before even knowing the other person’s gender, name, or race.

Kids are growing up in a world – albeit partially a virtual one – in which your face and body doesn’t matter as much as your thoughts and words. In many ways, that is a very, very good thing.

wildpotato's avatar

This extremely in-depth analysis predicts that by 2020, 44 states will have approved gay marriage. He says additionally that at the moment it seems to be a steady trend and gains at 1.5% per year. 44/50 = 88%, and the remaining 12% should take 8 more years, so 2028 would theoretically see total legislative acceptance of gay marriage – so, in about 14 years. I get the sense you’re in your forties-ish, so it’s likely this at least will occur in your lifetime.

I have no idea of how to answer the question of how far acceptance of sexuality lags behind the above figures. Off to find another study…

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I’m 50, if it matters.

linguaphile's avatar

We have made progress… my husband and I were discussing slurs with our kids, explaining what the work “slur” meant. None of our kids (age 11, 14, 16) could make sense of many words we offered as examples—

johnpowell's avatar

I think Seek is onto the right idea. I think that random communication will change things very quickly. I will take Hawaii_Jake as a example. I loved what he wrote before I found out he was gay.

So lets say I went with the bible teaching me being gay was wrong. Then I met Jake with no clue that he was gay. Now that is a internal conflict. And I would probably come out on the side of accepting him for who he is since he has proven himself as being a wonderful human.

bossob's avatar

I’m seeing more and more politicians publicly and lovingly accepting the gay members of their family. Each one who does so reduces the legal obstacles for the activists.

Sometimes, familiarity breeds not contempt, but acceptance. The more exposure we have, the more ordinary it becomes, to the point that we don’t even notice anymore.

RealEyesRealizeRealLies's avatar

“Will acceptance of sexuality become commonplace in my lifetime, too?”

Hi hopes for sure. What in this life is universally accepted?

dxs's avatar

I don’t like when people are referred to as “gay”, but I find the topic of sexuality really interesting, so that’s why I talk about it. What bother’s me is when people associate characteristics with sexuality and that separation just makes things worse.

JLeslie's avatar

I think it will happen in America within the next 10 years. People will still stereotype to some extent and talk about gay people as a group (like we do about other groups, and I don’t mean it is necessarily negative) but I think people will finally relent and accept there are gay people, they should be treated equally under the law, and the outspoken people against gay marriage and gay people in general will finally move on to hating someone or something else.

One reason it or they are talked about so much now is because it is political, and the parties use differences to wind people up. Right wing against gay marriage, liberals are for it. Something they can play to their base on. Once it is legal for gay people to get married in all or most of the states, the issue will begin to dissapear.

At least that is what I think.

ibstubro's avatar

“I am wondering when sexuality will be a non-issue.”

Shortly after sex, race, religion, national origin… In short, not in the foreseeable future. Humans are adversarial by nature, and generally fear the unknown. It’s almost inevitable that any minority is going to he harassed and looked down upon by someone – usually a larger minority.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

When all combinations of people having sex has the ability to produce biological children.

Judi's avatar

I think there will always be closet bigots I’m ashamed to say. It may become less socially acceptable to be a bigot but they will always be around and will not consider themselves bigots.

augustlan's avatar

It may never be 100% accepted. I mean, there are still racists and sexists, when you’d think we’d be long past that kind of nonsense. A certain percentage of people are always going to suck, and that’s just a fact of life.

But I think sexuality will largely be a non-issue when the children of today are grown and the older generations have died out. I sincerely hope I live to see it.

ragingloli's avatar

In your lifetime? No. Apeity still has not gone past Racism, Sexism, or Religon.

ucme's avatar

The other day, my daughter (14) & I were strolling through our local shopping centre when we happened to walk past two guys holding hands. As we did, one guy kissed the other on the cheek, I didn’t pay it a moment’s thought, but my daughter simply said “what a cute couple”
Not a word about their sexuality or reference to this being a rare sighting around here, just an honest remark without a hint of complication thrown in.
Oh & did I mention, I fucking love my daughter, she’s wonderful.

blueiiznh's avatar

Give it another 30 years for it to be a non issue.

hearkat's avatar

I have to agree with @ibstubro and others who say it may never happen on a worldwide scale. I was born in the 60s and I imagined that women would have equality by the time I hit adulthood, and that has yet to happen. Religious intolerance has continued for millennia, as has racial and ethnic intolerance. Add to that the fact that some religions and cultures are still vehemently opposed to homosexuality, and you can be sure that people will continue to judge others who are “different” as “lesser”. There may be pockets of places where it won’t matter, like in certain cities today, but global tolerance of all varieties of humans probably won’t happen until we are on the verge of extinction and truly need each other.

kritiper's avatar

Maybe when they stop talking about themselves.

ragingloli's avatar

yeah, because segregation was abolished because the blacks kept their mouths shut

tups's avatar

Depends on which part of the world you are talking about. A law in Uganda that sentences people to death if they are suspected of homosexuality has just come through. In other countries homosexual marriages are legal in church. But that doesn’t mean everybody in these countries is accepting of homosexuality. Some countries are years ahead of others and people in these countries are also different. I hope one day the whole world will stop caring about other people’s sexualities, race, gender and so on. But the world is mad and people have a hard time accepting the different.

flutherother's avatar

Society’s attitude to ‘the gays’ has been completely transformed in my lifetime. From being secretive and afraid they have gone to being open and accepted. There may be people who are still bigoted about it but they tend to keep their mouths shut. It is no longer an issue here. Gays haven’t gone away, but the prejudice and the hostility has and society is the better for it.

ibstubro's avatar

I think the prejudice is bubbling just below the surface, @flutherother, much like racism. As time goes by and tensions cool, it gets deeper and deeper buried, but the farther from urban regions you go the thinner the veil, even now.

cheebdragon's avatar

I’m not sure calling them “the gays” is helping.

Hypocrisy_Central's avatar

yeah, because segregation was abolished because the blacks kept their mouths shut
It got officially abolished because well-intended white people got involved. When a Black person opened their mouth there was a tree and a rope with their name on it, or worse; ask Mary Turner what happens when you open your mouth about the injustice done to you and your husband.

kritiper's avatar

We have a choir here called “The Gay Men’s Choir.” SO not helping!

tom_g's avatar

@kritiper – You’re so right! Homosexuals experience bullying, violence, discrimination, have to fight to be able to marry who they love, etc. because you guys have a choir there called “The Gay Men’s Choir”.

kritiper's avatar

@tom q – I wonder what people would think if we had “The Straight Men’s Choir?”

tom_g's avatar

@kritiper – Again, you’re spot on! Since homosexuals aren’t discriminated against and do not experience alienation, any attempts at creating something for themselves can immediately be compared to the dominant group’s attempt at excluding the minority.

I was going to support rights for homosexuals until I heard about this “Gay Men’s Choir”. How dare they discriminate against heterosexuals. How much more of this will we stand for?

kritiper's avatar

@tom_g – I don’t think things are as bad as all that anymore. People have become so much more respectful of the differences of others nowadays. About time, too. I just wish that announcing the fact of being gay didn’t come across as so confrontational. It seems to scream “Here I am and here’s what I am!. Wanna make something of it??”

flutherother's avatar

Heard on the news this morning that Alan Turing has been given a royal pardon. He cracked the German codes during the Second World War only to be ‘convicted’ of homosexuality in 1952 leading to his death.

Seek's avatar

Hmph. Could have been pardoned before the chemical castration and later suicide.

mattbrowne's avatar

The same time terms like “the African-Americans” no longer used.

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