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Jonesn4burgers's avatar

Who would you choose?

Asked by Jonesn4burgers (6639 points ) 3 months ago

This question is inspired by both an answer on a jelly below me thread, and something my daughter once told me.
I guess my daughter got to an age when she feared that my disabilities and poor health might take me from her before she grows up. She told me she had a dream that I died, and she was sent to an orphanage. She is a big fan of the show Bones, and she told me that in her dream, “Bones”, Temperance Brennan, adopted her. She worried that it would hurt my feelings. Of course, it did not. I thought she chose a good substitute.

If you had to choose your own mother, not the one you have/had, who would she be, and why?

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45 Answers

GloPro's avatar

My sister is the best mother I’ve ever seen. She’s got 4 kids, and right out of the gate she has been stellar. My own mom, although a great woman, was not very motherly when I was young. My sister wasn’t either, but when she got married she vowed to break the chain, and she has done a remarkable job. So I would pick my sister, in her currently motherly state.

ragingloli's avatar

Kusanagi Motoko. She kicks major arse, and is hot.

Mimishu1995's avatar

I think I’ll choose no one. My mom is always my mom and no one will replace her!

johnpowell's avatar

When I was 15 I got so fed up with my mom I stole some quarters and walked down to a payphone in Fontana California and called my sister in Oregon. She bought me a bus ticket. A few hours later I had packed up some clothes and my Walkman in a garbage bag and walked to the Greyhound station.

Best damn thing I ever did. My sister is the most amazing person I have ever met and I would let her raise me all over again if I could.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

@johnpowell , wow! That is an awesome story. I was eldest, so I had no-one to turn to.

@Mimishu1995 , you are not following the rules. Many would prefer to keep their own mother, but this question is, if you couldn’t then who, and why? I am not wishing away anybody’s Mommy here, just asking what if you HAD TO?

Mimishu1995's avatar

Well, if I really had to… I think I’ll choose you :D

LuckyGuy's avatar

@ragingloli Fujiko Mine is no slouch either.

In her day Margaret Thatcher seemed to have her ducks in a row. I’d let her set me straight.

In real life it was my father who raised me. Thanks Dad!

jca's avatar

It could be anybody in the world? If so, then I’d choose my grandmother. She was like a mother to me. If someone else, or a TV show mom then I’d have to consider it more.

ucme's avatar

Kelly Brook, she’d still be breastfeeding me now.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

@Mimishu1995, awwwwwwww, that is so sweet! (((((((HUG)))))))
@LuckyGuy, @ragingloli, I know not of whom you speak, except Margaret Thatcher. She seems like a pretty good choice.

Dan_Lyons's avatar

I would choose Oedipus’s mom. She must have been a wonderful lady.
Although Kusanagi Motoko is pretty hot.

@johnpowell Fontana… There once was a business out there we knew as the cable skiway. Electric powered motor ran a cable above a square lake surrounding an island.
You water skied there.
Maybe it was Rialto. It was back in the 70s. Electric bill got too high and they phased out before the 80s. Great fun.

Cruiser's avatar

My mom is a truly wonderful, funny, patient, loving and caring woman and I cannot think of any other woman I would have for my mom.

jca's avatar

@Cruiser: You’re not answering by the rules.

ibstubro's avatar

Ann Bancroft.

Cruiser's avatar

@jca Rules?? I don’t need no stinking rules! :P

livelaughlove21's avatar

I’d choose my own mother, based on my childhood alone. She was great. Not until I became an adult did she go crazy. Now I’d happily trade her in for a new non-insane model, but my mother-in-law evens things out a bit.

ucme's avatar

Norman Bates

Pachy's avatar

I would not be who I am without the mother I had and recently lost, and the parts of myself I like best about myself came from her. The type of person she was and all that she accomplished in her life make her the only mother I would ever choose.

I would also choose to word your question: Whom would you choose?”

Aster's avatar

Since the question stated “not the one you have” I’d probably choose my younger daughter. I’d be lavished with every material thing I could dream up, we’d have cuddle time on the couch, she has one hundred friends who would do anything for her. everything she touches turns to gold, her kids go to church with her every Sunday, I’d have a great wardrobe, a spotless house and , not that it matters one bit, she’s a knockout. She looks exactly like a Barbie doll. Oh; she’s also smart and a nurse.

Winter_Pariah's avatar

Mother Earth, sure she may attempt to kill a massive number of her children each and every day, but that’s arguably better than the mother I was born to.

Some people really should not have children.

livelaughlove21's avatar

Ha! I totally did what I bitch about other people doing and didn’t follow the rules of the question.

Okay, if I can’t pick the one I had, I’d pick the mom from Easy A. Can I do that? :) That dad, too, while I’m at it.

Dutchess_III's avatar

My daughter, Corrie.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

@Cruiser, @Pachy, c’mon guys, stretch yourselves a bit. I am glad you love, adore, prefer your moms. You are very fortunate. Sometimes the universe we live in limits our choices. This thread mimics the natural universe in that fashion. It is wonderful you would not choose to lose your natural mothers. This question is IF that choice were taken from you, during your youth, WHOM would you choose to fill that void? Of course, those who have had such wonderful mothers, have a more difficult task before them, as knowing what can be makes the search more exclusive.
@Pachy, thanks for the edit.

Pachy's avatar

Thank you, @Jonesn4burgers, for the clarification. Nevertheless, I stand on my original comment.

Coloma's avatar

I’d choose myself. haha
I was a great mom to my daughter, and had a vested interest in being a better mother to my child than my mom was to me.. My mother was very emotionally fragile, never was able to heal her wounded inner child and I payed dearly for the sins of her parents as well.
She was guilt tripping, manipulative, critical and saw me as her minion, did her best to thwart my healthy independence and was, in general, a miserable martyr inspite of her high intelligence.

Thank God I inherited my dads personality and loathe martyr types, jesus, give up the cross, somebody else could use the wood. lol
I was fun loving, creative, inventive, taught my daughter kindness, a love of nature, animals, good morals, values, was involved in all her activities and best of all, I was the mom that said ” Sure we can keep it!”
In parenting her I also healed many of my childhood wounds. A win/win.

Cruiser's avatar

I would have to choose this wonderful lady I met online who is such a worldly, down to earth, smart, funny, caring, a loyal loving wife with a really cool husband who I guess would then be my dad.

Dutchess_III's avatar

When I was a kid, like standing in line at a grocery store, and if I saw a lady who was pretty and seemed nice, I’d sort of wish she was my mom. Kind of a sad commentary on my Mom. She wasn’t exactly abusive, just harsh. She yelled a lot, and made a lot of wrong and ugly assumptions about what I was doing, especially as I got into my teenage years.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

I find it interesting how many have chosen relatives.
@Aster, your daughter! I love that!
@Coloma, funny you choose yourself. I had to raise me, no choice about it. I belive my dad would have, if only he knew how. My mom put on a good front, more concerned with appearing “Nice”, than actually accomplishing much. She was driven to do for herself, others had to stand in line. She whined a LOT. She had nice dressescinched tightly at the waist with those skinny 50’s-60’s belts. Her make up was powder and grease which was applied just so. She had to have enough spray on her hair to make it quite crispy. Meanwhile, my brother and I were running around with green crap hanging from our noses, and she would never really be aware of what we were doing, or what was going on with us. Her best advice to send me with into the world? You’d better marry as well as you can, we won’t have anything to leave you.
@Dutchess_III, you probably would have chosen her if you had been in line behind her. She had a dark side, avery dark side. She kept it so well hidden, it took my whole life to put together why certain things don’t fit. You would be much happier with Corrie.

Me? I used to see myself with no mom. Usually, I daydreamed myself with “Uncle Bill” from the long ago show Family Affair. I had a grade school teacher I would have chosen, but she had three daughters, and I felt she wouldn’t have room for me. One of my grandmothers would have been my ideal choice, but I would never have asked. She had taken care of half the world already, and I could never have added to her burdens. I would have wanted someone who could give me a realistic concept of the world, and how society works. I would want a mom who spends time with me because she likes to, not because somebody told her she ought to. I think somebody like Mrs. Cunningham from Happy Days, though maybe a little more contemporary.

ibstubro's avatar

Okay, I’m gonna go out on a limb here, and suggest @Coloma would be a good choice for me. @Dutchess_III and @Jonesn4burgers? I’m booking auditions. Scheduling stamina tests.

Can I pick @juels as a sibling? Oh, and @dxs? Crap.

Night John-Boy!

Maybe @Coloma could just head the commune. It takes a village…

Coloma's avatar

@ibstubro My breast is fairly ample, here, let me snuggle you under my wing, but just for a minute, I don’t stay still for long. lol
Can we get geese, can we, can we, can we, pleeeease momy!

Symbeline's avatar

This be gettin bizzare.

ARE_you_kidding_me's avatar

Freud would have a thing or two to say here.

I’ll take Harriet Tubman

Coloma's avatar

@Symbeline Hahaha..and I am stone cold sober. I will run with anything. lol

chewhorse's avatar

Well, before I’d choose Temperance Brennan, I would definitely have to control my emotions as logic doesn’t get along very well with emotional outbreaks. My mom was the best mom in the world just as yours is. All mothers have this talent.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

My mom is not the best in the world. She was a monster! It was my daughter who chose “Bones”, not me. She dreamed it. She worries she will lose me to bad health. She has no desire to trade me in. My question has NOTHING to do with trading your mom for someone else. It says if you had no choice, had no mom, whom would you chose? It does not hint to or encourage anyone to shitcan their mom. However, not everyone has or had a wonderful mom. If you did, you are lucky, yay. “All mothers have this talent.”?????/ Seriously?!?
There are women who kill their kids. There was Smith (what was her name?). She shoved her car in a lake with her two boys inside. One was too little to get out of his carseat, but the older boy got himself loose, and looked out the back window at her as the car sank! There are mothers who pimp out their young daughters. There are mothers who sell their babies to slave traders to pay for their habit. Lots of women have babies. Several are nothing like moms.
This thread is not about mom bashing though. It is so we can express what sort of person would be the mom we’d have chosen, if for whatever circumstance, we didn’t have one, and had a choice.
I am sorry some of us lived without super moms, with love, and devotion, and wise choices. I wish we all could have ideal moms. It doesn’t happen like that a lot. People with some imagination can consider what it must be like to have no mommy, and what they would look for if they were in that scenario and were offered the opportunity to choose.
Good grief, what a mob! I swear I see nothing in my post that I intend to remove anyone’s sweet mommy.
On that Blind Date thread, are we really expected to date the pick we make? Are there so many, who cannot understand hypothetical?
Okay, I beat that rug long enough. It can go back to the hall now.
Thankyou, participants for sharing your thoughts. PANCAKES!

LornaLove's avatar

I can’t think of a specific person right now, but she would be loving, nurturing and very maternal. All the things my mom was not.

Mimishu1995's avatar

@Jonesn4burgers I’m not offended at all. My mom will eventually have to go. That’s inevitable. And the idea of having to choose someone is good, though I just don’t want anyone to replace my mom.

And by the way did I say I choose you?

Buttonstc's avatar

I would choose Betty White (as her real self, not as the ditzy Rose character she played).

She’s an amazing strong woman not afraid to be an optimist in all things and she loves animals. And getting older hardly slows her down a bit ; Definitely someone I could admire and respect as a Mother.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

@Mimishu1995, yes, my young friend. I thanked you for that honor. It is very kind of you to give me a compliment so special. It is my hope that your mother is with you, and loving you for many, many years yet to come. Even so, I am proud of you, working so hard with your studies, learning english, japanese, chinese, and more. You are a good girl. The differences you claim about yourself give you flavor. If you were ice cream, you would not be vanilla! I think you would be cherry marshmallow chocolate chunk, with candy sprinkles. I love your enthusiasm, and your inquisitive nature. You are delightful. I’m sure if someone would ask your mother who would she want most in the world for a daughter, she would say you, and proudly. :-)

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

Wow @Buttonstc! Awesome choice! How did I not think of her! She is the origonal definition of awesome. I have an episode of Millionaire with her. It was either her first, or second acting job. I forget which. She played the part of a sweet young waitress working at a hamburger joint in Keokuk, Iowa. I watch it, and try to imagine her a young new actress, excited to have the part, but nervous about doing it well.
I want her too.

Mimishu1995's avatar

@Jonesn4burgers You’re making me blush :D

And a little edition: …learning english, japanese, chinese Vietnamese

AshLeigh's avatar

Um, the Mother of Dragons, Daenerys Targaryon.

cheebdragon's avatar

I couldn’t pick a different mom, but if I could pick a dad or a grandpa I would pick Sam Elliot.

Haleth's avatar

I think Leslie Knope would be an awesome mom. She celebrates Gal-entines day! How cool is that?

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