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talljasperman's avatar

How do I get over being scared of losing the last of my family?

Asked by talljasperman (18528 points ) May 25th, 2014

My mom is all I have left. I don’t have any friends and the rest of my family I don’t get along with. I am scared that if she were to leave that I would have nothing left. I call her daily and tell her how my whole day went. Right now she is dating someone and she asks me not to call as often, so I Fluther more and I bought a TV and got basic cable, It helps a little but I still miss my mom.

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8 Answers

Dan_Lyons's avatar

I don’t think you can ever really get over this sort of feeling under these circumstances @talljasperman.
But keep in mind that she worries about possibly losing you too.

Obscurethinktank's avatar

Well you should be scared of loosing ones you care for. if it’s emotionally or physically. I lost my mother, sister, brother and father. All I have is my step-dad. I had to deal with it in a hard way. I was scared, but after a while you still fell the sting of the loss, but you can’t really forget. It’s good that you bought a TV and stuff. Anything you can d to get your mind off of it will greatly improve your situation.

Mimishu1995's avatar

@talljasperman Let’s get thing straight a bit: are you scared that your mom will one day leave this world or are your scared that she will one day no longer care for you?

talljasperman's avatar

@Mimishu1995 I’m jealous and afraid that she might die or one day have dementia. I lost my grandma from dementia in 2010. She lived till 92 and she died from neglect and isolation from the family. She probably didn’t think anyone cared. She was blind and constantly asked to go home. She was man handled every time that she tried to leave the nursing home to to her old house.

anniereborn's avatar

I am so very very sorry you had to go through that with your grandmother. That most surely is contributing to your fear. That is very understandable. I know you mentioned church a little while back. Despite what some naysayers said, I think it’s a good idea. Community and friendship is a very important part of life.

DipanshiK's avatar

Just believe that everything will be alright. Don’t clench these questions in your head. Holding doubt within oneself, only makes it worse. Sometimes we can’t suppress the situations even if we want to. So just let it be. All you can do is hope.
Well in our case, I would suggest that you talk to your mom as seldom as possible. And get yourself busy with work or any other activity, that will help.

susanc's avatar

What??? “Talk to your mom as seldom as possible”? That’s not very nice. She loves him, she just wants him to talk to people besides her, because she needs some time to herself.
And, @talljasperman, you do need to be involved with lots of other people even if your mom continues to be the best person you know.
All the things you’ve done to keep busier are very good! The next step is to do a few more things with living, breathing humans. I know we are kind of awful, but that can be kind of interesting, and I think you could learn to enjoy some of us. In person!

DipanshiK's avatar

Her mom is the only one he is left with. It’s important for him to talk to her to attain an emotional stability in his life. It’s better for both of them @susanc

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