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Chey97's avatar

What should I say when I meet my boyfriends parents?

Asked by Chey97 (59 points ) May 28th, 2014

My boyfriends parents want to meet me and I am very nervous. I don’t know what to say. He says they’ll like me, but I’m still scared.

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20 Answers

lornahayes's avatar

its always good to just be your self. Show them that you love their son. be kind and helpful always show good manners and show them that your a quality person.
this will help them to get to know you and learn to like you.

Chey97's avatar

Thank you very much. He has a four year old son that I am very anxious to meet. I have always wanted a boy for my first child.

lornahayes's avatar

that’s great i hope things go well
its always good to show you are a kind, loving affectionate person
do you have any advise for my question

Chey97's avatar

My profile hasn’t said anything but when I see it I will. And that you so much.

gailcalled's avatar

Remind yourself that they are probably just as nervous.

GloPro's avatar

Ask them questions about themselves or their opinion of their son. Don’t play 20 questions, though. And don’t one-up their responses.
Try to say less than they do. Like me, I won’t shut up when I’m nervous. Do as I say, not as I do.
Have fun! At least you can only meet them for the first time once!

Chey97's avatar

Thank you guys so much. Lol.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

Relax, they can’t be any worse than my family. When my stepfather to be took my mother on their first date all of her brothers and sisters and their spouses came to my house and were sitting around the kitchen table when he brought her back to the house, just to bust his balls. Needless to say he didn’t come in the house. Now he loves them and he fits right in.

Chey97's avatar

Thank you

JLeslie's avatar

I never understand the nervous when meeting parents, but many people do get nervous so you are not alone.

Stand with confidence, smile, shake their hands firmly (assuming you are in America) and while doing so look them in the eye and tell them how pleased you are to meet them.

Then just let everything happen naturally, be yourself.

Chey97's avatar

Ok . Thank you all very much. Your advice is greatly appreciated.

livelaughlove21's avatar

“Hi, I’m _______. It’s nice to meet you.” would be a fine start. They’re just human beings.

janbb's avatar

My son just brought his girlfriend home for the first time. I was looking to make her comfortable and to get to know her. She was quiet but helpful, warm and appreciative. Don’t feel you need to put on a big act just be pleasant and helpful as warranted.

jca's avatar

Smile a lot, say hello, small talk. If you’re in their house, make conversation about something you like. “I love this view!” or something like that. You will find the conversation will flow.

JLeslie's avatar

@janbb Helpful is a great point! I think a lot of people who are younger were not taught to be helpful, like offer to help in the kitchen, help clear the table, or help dry dishes, etc.

If they all take one car out to dinner the OP can offer to give his father the front seat if her boyfriend is driving, or to sit in back with his mom, or hold the door for his mom if it is appropriate (If she is much older) and she is on the same side of the car. I know that all sounds old fashioned probably, but I don’t see anything wrong with it. We don’t know anyone’s ages.

Chey97's avatar

Thank you guys. Those are wonderful ideas. I’ll be sure to do all those things.

JLeslie's avatar

Let us know how it goes.

Chey97's avatar

I will. I’m hoping to down there on the third. Thank you guys. I really appreciate all the great advice.

wingsonroots's avatar

If I were in your situation, I ‘d try not to think too much about myself (like personality traits and all, that makes me nervous too) and rather focus things I believe in (with regard to marriage, family, career, etc.) my dreams of future and how all this fits with their ideas. You should get to know them too by asking what is important to them, their expectations and other little details. It’s somewhat like a two way job interview, I think. Good luck to you!

Chey97's avatar

Thank you. All the advice is appreciated

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