General Question

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

As a child, what were you educated on regarding statutory rape?

Asked by Pied_Pfeffer (22028 points ) 2 months ago

This question is an off-shoot of this one.

The first time I learned about rape was when I was about 16 and attended a seminar on the subject. It wasn’t until adulthood when the term ‘statutory rape’ hit my radar.

Was this ever discussed with you? Parents of teens, do your children know about this and the laws of your area? It seems like it should be covered in any sex education discussion.

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26 Answers

JLeslie's avatar

When I was 15 dating an 18 year old his mom said something about going to jail. I asked why she said that, and he said she is just worried because you are only 15.

I really think part of jr high Sex Ed students should be taught about statutory rape, sexting, and the laws regarding those things, and the consequences. No means no could be taught then too encouraging a teen to say no if they are unsure about what they are doing and emphasizing if your partner seems the littlest bit unsure to stop.

If not in Sex Ed then some sort of life class that includes laws that are likely to possibly affect teens. Drunk driving, sexting, bullying, statutory rape, hell I wish some of these idiots where I live knew it was against the law to bring glass bottles to a swimming pool deck.

cookieman's avatar

Nothing. It was the 1970s. For all intents and purposes it didn’t exist.

I probably learned about it for the first time in college.

LuckyGuy's avatar

Nothing. I had the mistaken idea that it was for anyone having sex with a person younger than 12 or 13. It was not until a family friend (21 or over) was charged and convicted for having consensual sex with his GF 10 days before her 17th birthday that I discovered the many twists and turns in NYS law. Even the definition of sex is interesting. Do it when she is 17 and a day and everything is fine. One day before her birthday and you are branded a lifelong pervert and registered sex offender.
The crime level increases as the age drops, e.g.: younger than 15, younger than 13, etc.
Our family now knows what the expression “jail bait” means. Lawyers and ADA’s know too and some build careers (and bank accounts) on it.
I’d like to see billboards posting that info.

marinelife's avatar

Actually, now that you mention it, it was never mentioned in my childhood either.

JLeslie's avatar

@LuckyGuy Did her parents start the ball rolling? How did the law become aware of the sexual relationship? I can’t imagine how the girl feels when that happens.

I had forgotten the term jail bait, but I did hear it when I was in high school now and then.

Seek's avatar

They talked about it in my high school, during an anti-drug, anti-sex, anti-having fun before you’re 40 seminar.

Didn’t stop our English teacher for being a perv. We girls all knew exactly which shirts we had to wear to get a passing grade on test day. I was a good little church girl. I just spilled his Mountain Dew on the grade book. Asshole.

dxs's avatar

In all honesty, I had to google what “statutory rape” was, if that answers your question. I was only in high school a year ago.

zenvelo's avatar

I learned about it in 8th grade in 1969; the age of majority had just been lowered to 18, and our sex ed teacher told us it was Statutory Rape if someone 18 had sex with someone under 18.

And in high school the term “jail bait” was actively used to describe an older guy who dated high school girls.

I don’t think any of us could even conceive of an older woman wanting to even be with a high school boy, and I doubt we would consider it wrong.

LuckyGuy's avatar

@JLeslie No. Neither the parents nor the girl wanted to press charges – nor have the relationship end! The problem was they were doing it at a public organization and were caught. Both readily admitted to the relationship.
All the ADA needed was their admissions and birth certificates and he was done.

Mimishu1995's avatar

I still have a vague idea of statutory rape.

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

@Mimishu1995 The term statutory rape generally refers to sex between an adult and a sexually mature minor past the age of puberty.
In the country where you live, is there a law that states it is illegal to have sex with someone under a certain age?

Mimishu1995's avatar

@Pied_Pfeffer Yes. From various newspapers I read, it’s illegal to have sex with people under 18.

elbanditoroso's avatar

Not at all, never discussed, never even mentioned. (I was 16 in 1970).

I don’t think I ever heard the term until I was around 20.

We did hear (and use) the term “jailbait” to refer to an underage teenage girl, but I don’t think that we ever connected it to a term like statutory rape.

JLeslie's avatar

@LuckyGuy That’s awful. So, we need to make sure kids know not to have sex in public. The class also needs to teach kids to say nothing and demand the presence of a lawyer or their parents. Crap, I definitely had sex in public areas sometimes when I was a teen. Cars and fields and places I am forgetting. I don’t know if kids still do that stuff.

Plus, the laws regarding how kids are labelled for life in cases like these has to change. 17 year olds are being labelled child sex offenders on the registry for passing along a photo of their 17 year old girlfriend’s naked photo. I don’t mind them getting some sort of slap on the wrist, but labelled for life as a sex offender? Scary. If I were a parent I would be scaring my kids on purpose about those laws.

josie's avatar

When I turned 18, my dad gave me a seminar, in which he more or less said “If you screw up now, I won’t be able to help you. You will own it.”

One of the topics was statutory rape.

El_Cadejo's avatar

Yea, I had to become pretty familiar with the exact laws cause my ex(who was also batshit crazy) had a crazy mom that would try and do anything to shit on someones parade. One day after my ex and her got in a fight she called the cops about us. I was 16 my ex was 18 at the time. Obviously nothing happened.

LuckyGuy's avatar

@JLeslie And now he is a “Convicted felon”. A “Rapist” ! He has to write that on job applications and register with the police when he decides to move. Fortunately he is considered the lowest level, non-violent offender so neighborhood notification is not necessary.

longgone's avatar

My parents discussed issues like this very openly. I can’t remember ever hearing the actual laws listed, but we talked about age differences and listening to/saying the word “no” from a very young age.

JLeslie's avatar

@longgone Learning to say no doesn’t really cover statutory rape in my mind, athough learning to say no is important.

Judi's avatar

My mom was sixteen and my dad 22 when they got married. hat was normal in their era. I knew it was illegal when I was a teenager but I used my mom and dads relationship as an excuse to date much older guys. It wasn’t until recently that I realized how victimized I was by them. I was a little girl for goodness sake!

Pied_Pfeffer's avatar

@Judi What do you mean by victimized?

Judi's avatar

a 25 year old has no business having sex with a 15 year old no matter how willing she or he may be. I had a lot of issues since my dad died when I was ten. I was easy prey.

JLeslie's avatar

I think the majority of young women have no idea how men think. We don’t really understand. We don’t understand the teen boys or the bordering on perv men. We want to feel pretty and sexy and powerful and most of all wanted.

rojo's avatar

No, I learned about what it was from the streets. No talks, no lectures, no classes, nothing, just words of warning from older male friends.

Paradox25's avatar

Never. We had watched films and discussed child molestation, inappropriate behavior, STDs and sexual issues in general, but statutory rape was never brought up during my school years.

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