Social Question

talljasperman's avatar

I am sick of giving the image of being smart and learned. How can I quit showing off?

Asked by talljasperman (18007 points ) 2 weeks ago

What can I do to unwind after forcing myself to learn what I don’t want to… (like calculus and C++). I just want to play video games and watch YouTube. I still don’t want to go outside and I like small talk.

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41 Answers

elbanditoroso's avatar

Speak less.

talljasperman's avatar

@elbanditoroso O.k. but small talk is one of my favorite pastimes.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

Talk about other topics – neutral issues.

talljasperman's avatar

@ZEPHYRA Germany won the world cup in extra time.

elbanditoroso's avatar

@talljasperman – you asked my advice. You always have the option of not to follow it.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

Feed the birds , tuppence a bag. They don’t care if you sound bright, stoopid, or martian. Just keep tossing bredcrumbs, and enjoy that sunshine you avoid so religiously.
Pretend your bag of crumbs is a PS4 controller, and the crumbs are those little robots. Toss ‘em around and watch the birds gather!
If you are clever enough with how you toss the crumbs, you can get the birds to be pretty funny. My husband and I used to bomb ducks and geese in the head with popcorn. I t isn’t heavy enough to hurt, they are happy to eat it, and some make midair catches. If you go to the same place regularly, they will recognize you and gather around like crazed rock fans. After you use up all your bothersome banter on them, you can be around people, and happily talk about nothing in particular.
STOP JUST WALKING BY THE PARK! Spend time there!
:-)

talljasperman's avatar

@Jonesn4burgers I feed the blue jay in my patio . I found a huge bag of bird seed.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

Do you hear yourself? One bird, on your patio. I’m sure Jay appreciates you, but GO BEYOND THE WELCOME MAT. Get outdoors. Feed pidgeons, or ducks, or seagulls.
Do stuff which doesn’t use any batteries.
If I have to come up there and grab you by the hand and drag you outdoors. you will be pushing my wheelchair to get that birdseed and breadcrumbs out to the park. Now don’t make me come up there and do that!
Seriously, you need to get out, and bring nothing with you that takes batteries.

stanleybmanly's avatar

Before doing anything drastic you should consider whether or not your “achievement” at appearing smart and learned is preferable to a reputation for having the opposite traits.

Patton's avatar

Just act like you do on Fluther. You never give off that impression here.

janbb's avatar

I didn’t get the impression that you actually converse with people in your daily life so I wonder to whom you are conveying that image?

talljasperman's avatar

@janbb Social workers and psychiatrist’s… I’ve been teasing them until they let me move back home in Jasper. They get done get hung up on the psychic time travel anymore.

ibstubro's avatar

Who are you small talking with, @talljasperman?

talljasperman's avatar

@janbb They no longer get hung up on psychic time travel… I’ve got some of the workers on my side. @ibstubro Social workers and psychiatrist’s and people on the bus. line ups and waiting rooms.

Dan_Lyons's avatar

Be careful feeding seagulls. They can rapidly multiply and they are frighteningly large!

jerv's avatar

I have hobbies that take me out of the house and get me in contact with like-minded people. Sometimes it’s easy, like when we went to the street fair earlier today. One of the vendors there was a jewelry-maker (a big guy named “Troll”) who was also a gamer. Like most gamers, he was on my level; an equal. We gabbed about how the older versions of Shadowrun rules were overly complex, how much of a hassle it was working with Inconel, and basically geeking out about stuff that normal people wouldn’t understand or care about.

I have a knack for finding “my crowd”, whether it be metal-workers, gamers, car buffs, computer gurus, or what-have-you… but also keeping my geekiness hidden from those that don’t really give a rat’s ass about those interests. Trust me, the average person doesn’t care about the mechanics differences between GURPS and Shadowrun, or how the ATESSA system in a Nissan Skyline GT-R works, or anything like that. Hell, they don’t even know the difference between AGP and PCI-x! The key is knowing what will make their eyes glaze over and when to just keep your mouth shut.

But to be perfectly honest, I kind of got the impression from past posts that you were a shut-in, and not really all that learned (though you may have savant-like skills that I haven’t seen yet). In fact, it’s hard to believe that you are even above the age of 12.

You know C++, but cannot figure out basic operations on the Android OS, nor do you seem particularly computer-savvy.

You claim to game, but I have yet to see you have any experience with systems other than AD&D (arguably one of the worst, despite it’s commercial success).

Your knowledge of physics and engineering is profoundly lacking.

No offense, but I have to agree with @Patton; you don’t give that impression here! We do like you and all, but like @janbb, I also wonder who you’re talking to that gets that impression.

talljasperman's avatar

@jerv To myself. I’m just trying to find out about the glitch in my system.

Mimishu1995's avatar

@talljasperman I hate to say that, but I agree with @jerv and @Patton.

Actually, I’m quite surprised at your question. “Showing off”? You? That’s new to me. You don’t seem like that here.

Well, if you show off, then what’s the purpose?

talljasperman's avatar

@Mimishu1995 In school I had special counselling where I was told that I had a high I.Q. and I’ve been acting like a prude ever since… I finally want to stop because It’s no longer paying off.

ibstubro's avatar

Clearly, you’re starved for social interaction if small talk is one of your favorite pastimes and you’re limited to “Social workers and psychiatrist’s and people on the bus. line ups and waiting rooms.”

You need to apply to be a companion to the elderly. Sit with them during the day, make small talk, watch the TV and get paid. Come to think of it, you might apply to eat lunch at a local elderly care center. Cheap food for you, and much needed distraction for the residents.

talljasperman's avatar

@ibstubro Great idea. Thanks.

Mimishu1995's avatar

@talljasperman So, you are messing around like this because someone told you you had potential?

You may really have potential. But think about it, if you just sit in one place and show off, sooner or later people will catch up with you, and you can no longer be proud that you are better anymore. Think about it. Showing off serve you nothing apart from making you look ridiculous.

And like @jerv said, you still have something to learn. While you have time to show off, why not just use the time and learn those things instead?

Or at least just try to treat people like how you treat us here. If you can do it here why not do it in real life?

ibstubro's avatar

Is there a local soup kitchen you can volunteer at in your free time, @talljasperman? I bet you’d be there day and night after a while. Those people (not to say THOSE PEOPLE) have the most interesting stories.

talljasperman's avatar

@ibstubro I’m 2 blocks from the local soup kitchen… I’ll ask around.

jerv's avatar

I do no think that word means what you think it means….

prude : noun \ˈprüd\ : a person who is easily shocked or offended by things that do not shock or offend other people

Personally, I get around the issue by an utter lack of humility. I am comfortable with myself; I already know most of my “glitches”, and am fine with being a pompous Aspie who pushes themselves too hard sometimes.

I also do things other than talk and let my efforts speak for themselves. Try getting a 3-axis mill to use a 2-inch Seco cutter to do a 5-inch bore 14 inches deep in 20 minutes so as to save 4 hours and an extra setup in the lathe. Or even just building your own PC. Actions can speak louder than words.

ibstubro's avatar

I was once young, smart and handsome. Enjoy smart.

talljasperman's avatar

@jerv I thought that a prude doesn’t drink alcohol when offered… ect.

2davidc8's avatar

@talljasperman You mean “teetotaler”.

Darth_Algar's avatar

I’ve never particularly gotten that image from you, to be honest.

trailsillustrated's avatar

@talljasperman are you in New Zealand? or was that someone else… your social worker and doctors can put you onto a good psychologist that will help you, and also have programs that wll get you interactive in the community.

Darth_Algar's avatar

As I recall @talljasperman is Canadian.

GloPro's avatar

Just out of curiosity and on the chance that it will impact my answer… Do you mind sharing what your disability is? I do get the impression that you are smart. I do not get the impression that you are motivated. A truly smart person would try harder to impact a situation or conditions in life they are dissatisfied with. A truly smart person would not just ask for advice they never intend to take. There are things about you I find mysterious.

Haleth's avatar

1) Ask people questions about themselves, and be genuinely interested in the answer

2) Know a thing or two about a variety of subjects from all different parts of everyday life, like cooking, things to do around your local area, sports, books, and current events. You’d be surprised at how much it comes up in conversation. If you can talk with someone about their interests, it makes you come across more grounded.

talljasperman's avatar

@GloPro my Dr. won’t tell me he says that her doesn’t believe in labels… yet I am on AISH (Assured income for severely handicapped)

GloPro's avatar

I’ve never heard of a doctor that refuses to share your medical diagnosis with you. That’s kind of baffling to me. Do you find that helpful? Aren’t you curious to know so that you may research it and find answers to some if your traits that bother you? Does the idea of knowing scare you?

jerv's avatar

If a doctor won’t share the diagnosis with you, that’s an issue. The only time I’ve heard of that done is when the patient is not considered a functional adult adult; usually a minor, occasionally those that lack the cognitive ability (IQ) to understand. I’ve known people that were on disability for mental disorders, but their doctors did let them know what the diagnosis was. That in and of itself raises a few questions.

Darth_Algar's avatar

If your doctor refuses to share his diagnosis with you then it’s probably time to seek a new doctor.

ibstubro's avatar

I find this whole discussion absurd. Like a Seuss tale. Have we fallen into the rabbit’s hole? “I bought 500 hot dogs because I went hungry last month when the money ran out.” “I bought a big bag of bird seed for the sole jay that visits my patio.” I never leave my apartment.” “How can I impress random strangers less?” “I’m certifiable, but don’t know why.” “How can I find a high paying job?”

I largely enjoy your participation, @talljasperman, but you are an enigma.

trailsillustrated's avatar

well now, this sounds just batshit to me but its fine!! I do enjoy it!

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