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My parents are mad at me for being depressed?

Asked by Feta (895 points ) 2 months ago

I’ve been really moody lately and finally my parents harassed me so much today that I just came out and told them that they’ve said things in the past that really upset me and that I felt uncomfortable in their home and I didn’t think it was fair that they don’t hold themselves responsible for the things they have said to intentionally hurt my feelings.
And I admitted my darkest secret that I’ve had suicidal thoughts for a long time and that I’ve tried four times to kill myself.

My stepmom immediately began harassing me about when I’d tried to kill myself and how I’d tried to do it. She made fun of me and then said that I’m lying and wanting attention. She said I made it all up because I have friends that have problems like that (I have friends that are cutters and depressed because we’ve bonded over the healing process) and because I like the singer Elliott Smith (yes, she actually said that).

I asked her to stop yelling at me and my dad defended me, she was appalled and he quickly recanted that he wasn’t taking my side.
She saw that as a go-ahead to start mocking me again.
She threatened to have me admitted in a mental hospital. She said mockingly to my dad, “Well this is serious. Your daughter’s suicidal. She needs to go to the hospital right now. I think this is an emergency.”

After sitting in silence for awhile she tried asking me questions (rudely) and I said, “I’m not going to talk to you about it.” And she yelled, “Fine!!” and stormed out of the room and has been hiding in her bedroom for the past 3 hours.

I talked to my dad about it, he’s going to get me counseling.

But my stepmom is still mad. Funny thing is, she’s actually a therapist.

I don’t know what to say to her or if I should apologize.
I shared something with them that for the longest time I didn’t feel safe telling them. I’ve had it bottled up for years….and I guess I was right, it wasn’t safe to tell them.

So I don’t know what to do. Do I apologize to her and if I should…what do I apologize for?
Telling the truth?

(For the record, I’m not longer suicidal. I’ve just had things bottled up for so long that I’ve been on-edge)

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