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ZEPHYRA's avatar

Which major change in your life scared you the most and how long did it take to settle?

Asked by ZEPHYRA (15308 points ) 2 months ago

Was it a job change, a move, marriage, parenthood? What really challenged you?

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11 Answers

marinelife's avatar

It was when I had my 29th birthday and 30 was looming. I was in an unhappy marriage, living somewhere I did not like, and in an unhappy job. By the time I turned 30 I had changed all of that. It took 2–3 years for all the upheaval to settle down.

LuckyGuy's avatar

It was being told my PSA results (>17ng/dl) indicated I had a serious, well developed case of prostate cancer. That result scared me.
I did not panic or get depressed. I investigated and made a couple of somewhat risky treatment decisions that worked out for the best.

The first 18 months after diagnosis and surgery were awful. Incontinence and the thought that it was all for naught really brought me down. Fortunately, I met some guys in a similar situation and we cheered each other up!

That was 5 years ago. I’m fine now!

(Whew!)

Mariah's avatar

Realizing I wasn’t going to be able to get on with my life without getting rid of my colon. Dropping out of school to get it removed. It was terrifying, but I really had no other choice.

(It was a really good decision).

rojo's avatar

Having our first child 32 years ago. I expect to be getting over it within the next decade.

Pachy's avatar

I’ve experienced many notable life changes, but none more frightening than moving from Fort Worth, TX to Manhattan when I was 19. Except for a very brief trip to Queens, NY to visit an uncle and aunt when I was 10 or 11, I don’t recall ever having been out of my home state until that move. Everything was wildly new. New fast-paced environment, new kinds of people, new job, new college, new way of transportation (subway), and a new room-mate when the friend who had invited me to make the move in the first place deserted me after three months to move back with his parents.

But what a key move it turned out to be for me! I lived in NY for almost 10 years, started my career, completed my education, and got married before moving back to Texas.

Coloma's avatar

A divorce 11 years ago, but now I am facing the biggest vortex of change and stress again to date.
I moving to a new area next week, seeking new work and financially failing, all at the same time. The trickle down effect of this recession (depression ) has just kept on releasing a slow drip of default on my life as I have known it.
Right now I have about 3 weeks to get moved, ( next week ), find new work in a new area, figure out whether I am going to file bankruptcy ( makes me want to die on the spot after taking great pride in my financial responsibilities of a lifetime ) and am, in general also not healthy right now from all the stress.

I feel like I could have a heart attack at any moment.
Scared? More like terrified and have been fighting the urge to just gove up, completely, but, still I soldier on. hah.

hearkat's avatar

Parenthood, for sure. Being totally responsible for an innocent being, and completely accountable to him because he didn’t choose to be born or get to pick his parents. Terrifying! I very nearly fucked it up, too; but came to my senses in his early teens. Disaster averted.

KNOWITALL's avatar

Marriage. One man, forever? Changing, compromise, me? Scared too death. Took about five years to calm down.

rojo's avatar

@KNOWITALL Interesting, with me it was just an extension of the way I was living anyway. There was no big change in our relationship between being single together and being married together, no major relationship modifications. But then again, it was a formality needed to keep harmony among family members more that between my wife and I. Now kids and THAT CHANGE…. Whoa! Big heart thumping through the chest experience !

KNOWITALL's avatar

@Rojo For us divorce is not an opttion, so the commitment scared me more than anything.

janbb's avatar

The separation and divorce were the biggest changes of my adult life. Still settling…..

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