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Kairi's avatar

Is this cyberbullying?

Asked by Kairi (543 points ) 2 months ago

A girl has been following me to every site that I use and leaving comments on all of my accounts, calling me a whore and a slut and other names, as well as calling my boyfriend my “pimp” and saying things about ho I need to be on welfare and keep popping out kids so that I can keep said welfare (nothing against welfare people, as I grew up on it, but the way she is doing it is irritating). She is also following my boyfriend around online and making threats, saying she is going to send people after him if he goes to any of the events he likes, as well as placing accusations on him of crimes he did not commit and could not have logically committed due to location issues.

This is his ex that not only used me to lure us both out of the house and steal his stuff and flee to Vegas, and called me to threaten to slice my throat open and kill me if I didn’t dump him.

Friends in the legal field claim that this is not cyber-bullying, but I beg to disagree. Any ideas? I’ve read the laws and think it qualifies, but I’m being told no.

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11 Answers

El_Cadejo's avatar

While this doesn’t exactly answer your question, why not report these actions to the moderators of said sites? I don’t believe any reputable site would allow for that sort of behavior from one of it’s users.

Jonesn4burgers's avatar

This is absolutely cyber bullying! If she is doing stuff IRL too, then you have a stalking charge too, at the very least. Have you attempted to get a restraining order?

Kairi's avatar

She is in another state so I cant get a restraining order against her, unfortunately.

We tried reporting it but a lot is done anonymously so there is nothing moderators can do.

El_Cadejo's avatar

@Kairi What sites specifically are you talking about? Why is it anonymous?

Kairi's avatar

Facebook, tumblr, fanfiction.net

She doesn’t log into accounts for fanfiction.net and her facebook accounts don’t have her name and are fake.

El_Cadejo's avatar

@Kairi It shouldn’t matter really. Unless she really knows what she is doing, she is still posting from the same IP. This is something that can be easily blocked. I don’t know if these sites do this sort of thing as I don’t use them, but I don’t see any real reason why they wouldn’t if you report abuse and show proof of it.

Kairi's avatar

Some of them can but she is internet stalking me so she’ll just follow me elsewhere and use different computers to do so

Buttonstc's avatar

Yes. This is cyber-bullying and I don’t know who told you differently. She is making direct threats to you.

However, in order to bolster your case, you need to keep printouts of each and every threat.

Let’s face it, there are only so many computers a person can CONVENIENTLY have access to. And chances are she is doing most of it from her own IP address.

Since she has stolen your property, and because of the threats, you have every right to go to law enforcement.

But you need to be persistent and accurate in documenting EVERYTHING.

And don’t reply to any of her efforts to goad you. That just gives her more satisfaction and makes you look immature.

Ignore her, cut her off on Facebook and wherever else you can block her.

It won’t necessarily be easy but of can be done. And all it takes is for her to slip up and then you canbalso take her to civil court.

Definitely look into getting a restraining order. It doesn’t matter what state she is in. It matters what state you are in.

Kairi's avatar

I can’t block her because it’s mostly anonymous, but I don’t reply to it anyway. Someone else that reviews my stuff offered a review with words of encouragement in it and calling her a “disgusting” reviewer that i shouldnt pay any mind to, but that’s the only reply that has been made. The lead admin on one site blocked her IP address for me once I told him what was going on.

I’m getting printouts of both my stuff and stuff my boyfriend has accumulated, and we are looking into reopening the case against her for the theft (he closed it because she tricked him into thinking she would give it back if he dropped charges. Im teying to get gim to stop answering another friend on a three way facebook convo between him, his friend, and a fake account made by the stalker, but he doesn’t seem to listen.

After she called and threatened to kill me, the police refused to help, said I had no proof it was her cuz it was a blocked number, and said that because she us in another state, I am overreacting and needed to ignore it. I haven’t gone back to the police since because they simply refuse to do anything. I was directed to the D.A. of my county by a coworker and to a trooper he personally knows that may be willing to at least give me advice, so those are my next steps after this weekend (I work 16 hour shifts Saturday and Sunday so I have to wait)

jca's avatar

Even if she is using fake names, moderators on sites can mod the insults off, by deleting them.

Kairi's avatar

I can do the same but I’d lose the proof if I did so

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