Why the animosity on Fluther?

It’s interesting you view it that way. I share your experience with only having used those same 2 Q&A sites, but my opinion is completely flipped.

I don’t use AB anymore because browsing the questions just generally made me hate people. I can’t count the number of times I’d see questions like, “Who wants a hug?” Or, “Am I the only one who likes the color green?” Just stupid STUPID shit. It seemed like a majority of the site was just posting non-questions for attention, and happily receiving non-answers.

Case in point… I just went through the 1st page of questions on AB right now… >=/ Here’s what I found:
(none of these questions contain a description or anything that might validate a deeper meaning)

“Orange was the new black, but did you know blue is the new orange? In art, of course!”

“Why does my head feel like its going to explode?!”

“Do hairy bandits scare you, girls?”

“Modesty aside, I am _________!!”

“Were unicorns ever horny?”

“Only the wisdom of the fool can answer ___. From the pamphlet: The Weakest Wisdom of WABOO, a miniseries lecture. Hehe”

“Just when you’re having fun, you get PBd. How ironic is that? ;)”

“Damsel In __________”

“In what places or events is free ice cream given?”

“To discard everything that is unnecessary is the second principle of the art of stalking. Comprende’?”

“Not unless you remove the ‘Why’ in your questions will I be liking your questions again. To whom will you be saying this? Hehe”

That is the first 11 of 18 questions!!! WTF kind of idiot stupid shit is that!? It’s fuckin retarded… And the other questions—the ones that are worth anything—almost none of them have anything beyond a 3 word, let alone a 1 sentence answer. Sorry I’m getting all worked up about this… It’s just immensely annoying to me to see such stupidity. It’s why I stopped going there.

Anyway… When I was on AB (granted its been a while), the general mood of the site was childish or spiteful (now confirmed it still is). Answers were rarely as thoughtful or in depth as I find here, and hardly ever contained more than 2 sentences. When I moved to Fluther I was amazed to find people giving me paragraph long—coherent—answers full of content that I would actually use. In fact… Maybe that’s where your opinion comes from. Because Fluther tends to cultivate more heartfelt and specific responses, there’s more room for disagreement on a truly personal level. IDK… Personally, I’ve never had it out with anyone on here like I had on AB. The cultures are night and day. AB is like a preschool. Fluther is like working in the real world after college.

@Esedess
Good answer

There’s a tendency in a setting like this to reduce people to their positions. Your feelings about those positions then become your feelings about them. This format feeds in to that, just because it’s such a tiny little peephole through which to view something as complex as a human being. So we form mental caricatures of each other based on little snatches of text in the absence of the multidimensional information we have access to in face-to-face interaction. It’s easier to dislike a caricature than a human being.

Some people reveal more of their dimensions here than others do. If a member’s interactions here have mostly to do with their positions, then that’s what others are going to base their feelings on. So all I know about some members is what their political or religious positions are; I don’t have any good sense of what the rest of their lives are like. Others though reveal more of their personalities and interests and situations; My image of them is more fleshed out, less sketchy. I don’t necessarily think of them in terms of their positions. There’s more to like there.

Also, people get cranky. We have all kinds of sh*t going on, and sometimes we don’t see that we’re dumping all our frustration and pain into a response here.

I am obviously not immune to this, and have made a serious effort to cut down on my crankiness. Sometimes I don’t notice it until I have submitted it, and I will edit and/or flag it.

I also am practicing my ability to handle peoples’ crankiness towards me better. Rather than take it personally, I try not to take it personally.

but I am certain this fact contributes to the drop out rate on Fluther

I agree

Hi @josie.

I could speculate why there is so much animosity, but I would not want to drag the thread off point, which it surely would have gone. I can say I have gone through AB and YA and have not had the need to keep 5 flame retardant suits in the closet at the ready. <donning flame retardant suit> The culture here seems to….let’s say words cannot even describe it. I have to agree too many take things too personal, when the things they hold in their craw is not that important. Because they do, the person making the opinion becomes the opinion and whenever they express it is seen as an attack, or some conniving way to belittle them. In many cases I am sure it is more imagined than real, but it appears they are waiting with expectation that an insult will come and are at the ready to raise shields and arm photon torpedoes. Then toss in the alleged cliques where some people seem to walk lockstep on idea and support lurve any slight on the interloper who dare attack them (as they believe), and some Flutheronians feel targeted and bullied, some have even left.

Perhaps it is because Fluther doesn’t know what it really wants to be. When I arrived it seemed as people were touting this as a smarter more enlightened place than AB, YA, and Askville (fit that was what it was called). It appeared, to me, arriving here that the questions were more intelligent and thought provoking. Having been here long enough, I see no real standard. The question content is only a floor above YA, AB, etc. and I am being generous. I had an interesting question, so I thought, but it could not be asked without using the names of active and maybe inactive Flutheronians, but it is verboten. I guess if it is a mansion shout out and a few other noted exceptions, you can’t mention names, no matter how engaging the question might be. However, I can ask questions like this, and be quite above the cellar floor. I am sure I have not cornered the market on questions of that caliber. Is it really that high above “Do hairy bandits scare you, girls?” “Were unicorns ever horny?” “In what places or events is free ice cream given?” etc.? Rather than be so anal about crossed ‘T’s, and comma placement, or some arrant typo that would not degrade the context of the sentence as most of us should be smart enough to discern, (with all the college educated people, it should not be that hard to figure out) the focus should be on question content. <donning 2nd layer of fire retardant suit>

What animosity?

When emotions and tempers flare people forget how to respectfully disagree. They may find your views offensive and feel justified at being intolerant of them. Or perhaps they are grandstanding, engaging in the verbal equivalent of a fist fight with an audience. They come out strong because they want to “win” the argument.

@josie I like you despite the fact that we disagree on many things. PM me for my milestones and I will gratefully acknowledge you.

I used to see this as a place to sharpen my witty talons; now I am working on making it a place where I don’t get overly riled. I know whose toes I don’t want to step on anymore or which discussions aren’t worth engaging in. But once in a while, something or someone gets under my skin and I either engage verbally or decide to stay away from them permanently.

This is a place where those who stay tend to have strong opinions and many are of a similar mindset. So it’s great when others who have different opinions stay. And you have to be honest – sometimes you, and the rest of us, raise questions in a way that makes them particularly provocative. If you wave a red flag before a bull, he’s going to run at it.

I agree that the culture can drive newbies away. To encourage new people to stay, I have been pming new members that seem like a good match and encouraging them to stay and ask me questions if they have a problem with the site.

Repeat the mantra, “Some folks take this shit way too seriously”….............& breathe.
If i’m approached with animosity here, then i’ll either chew you up & spit you out, on general principle you understand, or, point & laugh, both are extremely effective deterrents.

@ragingloli . . . it’s when folks dress up like woodland critters and fuck each other.

@josie sends holiday greetings to his fluther. That’s dedication.

Because in an anonymous forum where people don’t use their real names and you can hide behind a keyboard people can safely be dicks.

So it’s great when others who have different opinions stay. And you have to be honest – sometimes you, and the rest of us, raise questions in a way that makes them particularly provocative.
Really? It seems if there are any provocative questions it is slamming religion or belief in Christ to be more direct. Any question that is challenging and makes one think, especially if the challenge is to one of the sacred cows, the rubber hoses, tazers, and boiling oil comes out.

Hypocrisy_Central When people blandly, and oh so innocently state something, or post a question which I’m sure they realize has an intention of provoking anger, rather than discussion, instead of bringing out the “rubber hoses, tazers, and boiling oil” I myself prefer not to take the bait.

While I am not afraid of a fight, nor unable to support my opinions, I find it a waste of breathe to argue with a person who seems to already have their mind made up.

You have a lot of fucking nerve asking this.

For me, I try to get along. There have been a few contributors who really, really didn’t get along with me. A couple I like to think I won over, a couple others who ain’t workin’ here no more.

Rubber hoses? What the fuck dude.

I usually answer questions then move on. I don’t really see a lot of drama around here.

@Symbeline Rubber hoses? What the fuck dude.
We don’t have bumper jacks anymore, cat-o-nine tails would seem to kinky, brass knuckles are illegal, and phone books are getting harder and harder to find, at least the thick heavy ones, that do the most damage.

How about pillywinks?

There is a sheeple mindset on Fluther, any and all opposition will be kicked to the fucking curb….probably for leaning right.

I haven’t noticed any animosity and I’ve been here for years. Maybe a healthy disagreement, which is ok.

@trailsillustrated you must not be a fan of the political questions.

Many people on here I would not only cross the street to avoid, i’d fucking run away screaming.

@cheebdragon I’m Australian, there’s quite a few people here that are not in America, so the political questions, while entertaining to read, I can’t really add to.

@trailsillustrated I was right! Well, kind of anyway, lol, I knew you either lived in Australia or New Zealand…
; )

@ucme

Sort of makes the point

You see, animosity right there from @josie
It’s rude to point.

Ooh, shit is about to get real…~

@cheebdragon what is a sheeple? What does it mean?

^ […what is a sheeple? What does it mean?
I take it that most here are too timid and reeking fretfulness they won’t step out of the lame the populace is in less they be rebuked and ridiculed

Sheep/people, word used to describe the masses who all act and think the same as decreed by some higher idea or influence and whatnot. Also ironically enough, word used by too many people, too often.

I thought it was a church for lambs.

@ucme . . . A sheelple is the pointy part on the outside of the church.

I thought it was the fleshy parts inside the church.

Here is the church, and here is the sheeple.

@Blondesjon Yeah, I said as much on another thread…

ucme’s avatar
It’s a tower like structure located on a church roof, erected by an all female team of constructors.
ucme (41331points )Great Answer! (0points ) Flag as…

Told ya

duh

Wow, you sound just like the old guy in the corner at a wedding.

Was that a piece of latent animosity showing up? ~~

“Sheeple is a derogatory term that highlights the herd behavior of people by likening them to sheep, a herd animal. The term is used to describe those who voluntarily acquiesce to a suggestion without critical analysis or research.”

No, it was banter, so I guess it’s all on you #nowtnewtherethen

I’m actually one hell of a good troll, I just refuse to be one here.

And how do you know who is a sheeple? If you’re not a fly on the wall in their home, who knows who is one? Is it a voting thing?