Care to play the "What's the moral to that story?" game?

I did saw a “Life in the ER” episode where a guy got super, super, super sick and it took them forever to find out what the problem was. They finally traced it back to a bar-b-que he had attended. The host had cleaned the grill with a grill brush that used metal thingys for the brush. One of those thingys wound up in the sick guy’s hamburger and he ingested it. It punctured his intestine.

What’s the moral here?

BBQ burger eaters beware.
What comes off the grill could be full of hardware.

A tourist in Yellowstone park decides it would be really cool to get a selfie with a giant Bison in the background. The Bison charges and tramples the tourist.

What’s the moral here?

You don’t have to go all the way to Spain to get trampled by a bull?

A man was killed watching a movie while his Tesla Model S struck a tractor-trailer at speeds approaching 90MPH.

WTMH?

He who watch movie while driving end up road kill.

A man decides to throw a stick of dynamite onto a frozen lake to blast a hole in the ice to go ice fishing. His dog runs after the stick of dynamite, retrieves it and runs under his truck that promptly blows the dog and truck to smithereens.

WTMH?

Jesus! Prince is composing so I’ll wait but…Jesus…

@Dutchess_III You mean Price haha. That is a true story from the Darwin Awards.

Oops, I’m throwing off the flow—sorry! Visitor at my door; carry on, jellies.

I know it was. All of these stories have the ring of truth. Since Prince Price appears to be stuck in Fluther pergutory, I shall answer…Oh. With his permission of course.

I think the moral of the story is you need to fucking anticipate what your dog’s reaction is likely to be in any situation. Anticipate children’s reactions too. Don’t assume that animals and children automatically know what is going on.

OK Pokemon GO didn’t help woman ‘catch ‘em all’ – but it did catch her boyfriend with his ex.

Moral?

WTMH?

If you have the IQ of a Ground Squirrel stay away from dangerous weapons like dynamite and GPS tracking on games. lol

If you decide to play on the “Toro Totter” the moral is…

www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVaBJSC3EXw

People don’t know the have the IQ of a ground squirrel so they don’t know to stay away. You can’t teach IQ. You can teach some critical thinking skills.

And you didn’t answer my moral question…

Pokemon GO didn’t help woman ‘catch ‘em all’ – but it did catch her boyfriend with his ex.

WTMH?

@Dutchess_III I did answer…my answer was if you have the IQ of a ground squirrel stay away from dangerous weapons like dynamite and GPS tracking on games. The guy wasn’t smart enough to put 2 and 2 together and realize his girl friend could track his whereabouts when game playing.

Okay..next scenario, I’m fresh outta ideas in the moment…

Oh. I guess I missed it.

Moral of the story: if you’re determined to take a Chansey, don’t Jinx yourself by Seaking a Slowpoke at an address your girlfriend will recognize. Duh.

New story:

A petrol tanker driver wasn’t certain whether his tank was empty, so he took a peek inside. It was too dark to make out, so he lit his Zippo and…

… Made himself a Darwin honorable mention.

WTMH?

… That dashboard gas gauges are a clever invention, but apparently you can’t catch save them all.

Suit up Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones. A blurry object is caught on satellite camera, and then the satellite’s signal fails. It’s obviously a NASA alien cover-up..

WTMH?

[Edit: worried the sarcasm wasn’t apparent. Hopefully it’s apparent.]

TMH, @Seek? “Even a dim bulb shines brightly in the dark!”

THM, @Soubresaut is that Area 51 is a secret plutonium dump left over from WW II and the people who visit it are frequently brain damaged and thinking-impaired.

2-fer

A man stealing wire from a vacant, historically significant, local hotel burned the building down when he tried burning trash in a bucket. That he was carrying, like a lantern, by the handle.

WTMH

Ah, I read too quickly and missed that it was the tank of gas not the truck’s gas tank…

Don’t put all of your trash in one bucket. lol

A man spray painted his face gold as a disguise for a planned robbery but died from inhaling the fumes after ignoring the clearly labelled do not make contact with skin or breathe fumes.

WTMH?

Don’t rob any house. You’ll lose more than you gain.
A man tried to help an accident victim to the hospital. While waiting for the operation he was suddenly attacked by an enraged relative of the victim thinking he was the one behind the accident.
WTMH?

Rely on logic, not emotion, when thinking and acting.

Bob makes an anonymous social media account, privacy in mind, with no links to any other accounts or known email address. All of Bob’s friends are notified about the account anyways.

WTMH?

Computers are gossips after all.

…

A ballerina killed a man who broke into her house and tried to attack her. She kicked at him, and her grand battement hit him in the jaw and snapped his head upwards and backwards so quickly his neck snapped.

This is indeed a true story.

WTMH?

Before breaking into any house, do a thorough investigation into your victim.
A crowd was watching a man teasing a bull. The bull was so furious it was clear that it was going to charge into the man but he didn’t seem to care. The bull ran at full speed to the man. The man suddenly jumped up at an insane height and the bull ended up charging into the crowd.
WTMH?

Always consider that your actions usually effect others, directly or otherwise.

(True, my Manhattan neighborhood)

Old man is paroled, sometime later fellow inmate is released. Inmate breaks into home of old man, believing he has a stash of money.

Old man is shot, wife hides, daughter climbs to roof and has construction crew next door call police.

Parolee chases daughter to roof then tries to run upon seeing crew witnesses. Parolee mounts fire escape, his urban cut (grossly oversized) jeans fall to his knees, he trips and falls five stories dead.

A ffect.

I’d say TM of @Mimishu1995‘s story is, “Don’t stand in front of an obviously enraged bull when it is clear he’s going to charge. Fool.” Even if he’d gotten the guy, the momentum would have carried him into the crowd anyway.

@SecondHandStoke, Don’t break into people’s homes? Fool?

A piece of iron falls off a flat bed truck and hits a person’s windshield, shattering it. WTMOFTS

Stay waaay back from trucks hauling stuff, waaaaay back.

A couple of drunk teens trespass onto someones property, climb the fence into a pasture and decides to jump on somebodies horse. The horse freaks out, throws them and they are impaled on a large sprinkler head.

WTMH?

Don’t trespass, fool?

A British guy is so foul mouthed after he’s been drinking, that he has been banned from saying any cuss words in public, or he’ll be jailed

Oh, I have a good one on standby!

His mama was short on soap, clearly. haha
@Dutchess go for it, I’m out of ideas.

A 93 year old German woman, visiting a museum, filled in a cross word puzzle, in pen. The cross word puzzle was part of a display, and it will cost $87,000 to fix it!

This is where I’m getting my stuff. UPI Odd News.

The moral there is “Avant Garde art is stupid.”

LOL! I love you, man! Now, you have to post a story. If you need a starting point, see my link above your head.

Moral?

Jesus, you’ve been righteous lately.

Fool.

Once upon a time there was an old man. He lay in bed and died.
WTMH?

Everybody dies?

What did that comment mean @SecondHandStoke?

The end of the world is coming on July 29th….AND IT’S REAL THIS TIME!

WTHM

Forget your diet eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we all die.

If you stick your tongue on a frozen lamp post WTHM?

OK. WTMH?

Well, the moral is don’t be a fool and stick your tongue on a frozen lamp post.

So there once was a mail box, an old fashioned one, set into the side of a house along the front porch. When the mailman slips the mail in, it falls onto the floor inside the house.
One day a woman came with her kids, a girl, 6, and a boy, 4, to visit her friend. As they were walking up to the door they passed that mailbox and the boy stuck his arm in the mail box, as far as he could, past the elbow, to wave “hello” inside the house. Then he couldn’t get his arm out. The woman and her friend tried for 15 minutes to get him out, but the boy was well and truly stuck.
The other kids who were free thought it was great fun and started playing The Adam’s Family. This made the boy scream in frustration “I DON’T WANNA BE THE THING!!!”
The woman and her friend, in unison, yelled at the other kids, so they quit.
They decided they had to call 911. The friend went inside to call from a landline. Just as the dispatcher picked up, some potatoes the friend had been frying when they showed up, and of which the friend had forgotten, started burning, and all the smoke alarms in the house started shrieking.
The free kids all grabbed hand towels and started flapping them in the smoke, running around the house screaming “FIRE!! FIRE!! FIRE!!”
The friend was standing on a chair, with the cord stretched as far as it would go, stabbing at the nearest smoke alarm with a broom in a desperate effort to break it, at the same time breathlessly yelling at the dispatcher ”THERE IS NO FIRE! THERE IS A KID STUCK IN MY MAILBOX!”
The woman was outside comforting the boy….who was old enough to know what smoke detector alarms mean, because the woman had practiced fire evacuations with her children and he was stuck in the wall of the house!
The woman and the boy were terrified for several very, very, very very, very VERY VERY long seconds, until the friend rushed out and told them it was OK and the house was not on fire.
The city sent three fire trucks, four ambulances and about 10 police cruisers.
They were able to extract the boy and all was well.

True story. The boy turned 29 today.

WTMOTSMM?

The moral is, if you don’t follow the rules, the whole question just deteriorates into nonsense.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Supreme Court Justice of the United States, dissed one of the two candidates for US president in the media, only to recant the next day.

WTMH?

Are you talking to me? What rules are there to this question that I didn’t follow? You said the scenario could be fake or real.

The highest court in the land is still the court of public opinion.

…

Father Jones walked into the sanctuary one weekday afternoon, and as he saw the light cascade through the stained glass windows and onto the altar was overcome with emotion. He knelt before the cross, bowed his head and said in a horse voice, barely ore than a whisper, “God, you are everything. I am nothing.”

His curate, Ms. Smith, walked in just behind him and witnessed this. She too felt the power of the moment, the simple beauty of it all. And as she was a good Episcopal assistant minister, she knelt just behind the rector, bowed her head, and joined with the prayer, “God, you are everything. I am nothing.”

Then Fred, the janitor, wandered in. He, too, felt the waves of the moment. Way back in the pews, he knelt, bowed his head, and prayed, “God, you are everything. I am nothing.”

The two priests looked back and saw Fred. The assistant leaned toward her senior and whispered, “Well, look who thinks he’s nothing.”

What’s the moral of this story?

Don’t follow religion.
A man sat in the coffee shop and looked out of the window. He saw cars and people.
WTMH?

A man with sight is a happy man even if all he gazes upon is boring. haha

Sorry guys, gotta go to bed now…I’ll pass the torch on the next scenario here.

The moral to the story is to be thankful for sight; it is better to see everything in beige land than see nothing in the land of excitement.

What is the moral here?

A woman while boinking her hubby hit the big “O” and yells another man’s name out. The husband gets infuriated and strangles her to death (inspired by real events).

Yelling during sex is just rude.
Everyone eventually has motel sex.

From 2008 to 2011 there were 92 deaths from taking dietary supplements.
“You can’t trust that they’re going to work or that they will be safe just by looking at the label.” according to Consumer Reports health editor Ellen Kunes.

WTMH?

That you can die dieting, that is why die is embedded it.

A man wondering if his gas tank was indeed empty as his vehicle stated tried to look into the tank with a flashlight, upon finding the flashlight batteries were dead attempted to do the same with his lighter. He discovered there was gas as he ignited it blowing the vehicle up and killing himself (inspired by true events)

Moral of the story is?

There should be an idiot test before handing out driver’s licenses or allowing someone to buy a car. A couple of weeks ago there was an idiot pumping his own gas while smoking a cigarette. He actually used the hand holding the cigarette to rescrew the gas cap on when he was finished.

You are driving along in the country when you see some tall poles sticking up in the distance with birds flying around it, and you immediately think it’s a PoGo gym, even though you know PoGo isn’t found in rural areas. You get closer and realize it’s a sub power station pulling in electricity from the wind turbines in the state next door, and the birds are hawks that fly away.
WTMH.