General Question

chromaBYTE's avatar

What are some great bumper stickers you've seen in your time?

Asked by chromaBYTE (652 points ) November 3rd, 2008

Or phrases that would work well on a bumper sticker, or your own invention of a bumper sticker!

They can be funny, ironic, philosophical, anything!

Observing members: 0 Composing members: 0

65 Answers

Bluefreedom's avatar

Here are a few that I remember:

- My kid beat up your honor student
– Spending my child’s inheritance
– If you can read this, you’re too close
– How’s my driving? Dial 1–800-Eat-Shit
– I brake for nobody

chromaBYTE's avatar

One of my favourites is ”Even though this is a STUPID STICKER you’re squinting to read it.

GAMBIT's avatar

The Reagan era. – No-MoreRon

EmpressPixie's avatar

The one I remember the most (though I questioned the sanity of) is definitely:

What would Lady Macbeth do?

bodyhead's avatar

I’d rather die peacefully in my sleep like grandpaw, not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

(one I’ve seen)

Megan64's avatar

Somewhere a village in Texas is missing its idiot.

(One I’ve seen)

breedmitch's avatar

(small caricature of Bush)
Stop Mad Cowboy Disease

KatawaGrey's avatar

-Get out of the way, my kid has to pee!
-Buckle up. It makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car.

Probably my favorite is one my mom saw when I was very little. It was a campaign sticker for Picard and Riker. :)

EnzoX24's avatar

Be Nice to America,
Or We’ll Bring Democracy To Your Country

A Confederate flag is in a Circle with a slash through it, like anti cigarette signs
You Lost,
GET OVER IT!

syz's avatar

Piss off a conservative, think for yourself.
Your lonely, spinster aunt is actually a happy lesbian.
Oh, evolve.
Someone less dumb for president.

sfortunata's avatar

I saw one that said “I love dinosaurs” with cartoon dinos on it.

dalepetrie's avatar

I used to have one that said “I brake for no apparent reason”

SoapChef's avatar

Peace IS Patriotic

If you are not outraged, then you are not paying attention.

That’s Ms. Liberal, Pro-Choice, Tree-Hugging, Hippie, Freak to You, Pal.

cyndyh's avatar

Honk if you understand punctuated equilibrium.

jholler's avatar

Vote for McCain, he sucks less.
No, thanks, I already have a Messiah.
A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in an argument.
Powered by carbon offset credits.
............
and my personal favorite:
‘08…either way, we’re screwed.

EnzoX24's avatar

And a conservative is a man who is too ignorant take the other point of view

jholler's avatar

ooohhhh….you got me. (rolls eyes)

Trustinglife's avatar

“Wag more, bark less.”

kruger_d's avatar

What would Jesus do. . .for a Klondike bar?

syz's avatar

Oh! Oh! I almost forgot. “Necrophilia. That irresistible urge to crack open a cold one.”
and
“Feminism: The radical idea that women are people”

jca's avatar

God is coming….and SHE is pissed…...

KatawaGrey's avatar

@joey: Jesus Christ (so to speak). I wonder how many times that car has been keyed…

El_Cadejo's avatar

Peace takes courage too.

MacBean's avatar

Proud to be everything the right wing hates.
(currently on my car)

augustlan's avatar

I think therefore I am…
a Democrat.

bodyhead's avatar

You might have seen some form of this because I found other people had the same idea that I did. Back when the “W the president” stickers were real big my buddies and I made a bunch of “F the president” stickers and passed them out.

KatawaGrey's avatar

There are actually two abortion ones that I really like.

-if you can’t trust me with a choice how can you trust me with a child?
-I’m pro-choice and I vote
I have the second one but I’m too chicken to put it on my car because I don’t want anyone to key her

syz's avatar

@Katawa I saw one the other day that said “If men could get pregnant, then abortions would be an inalienable right”

jholler's avatar

I saw one today with the pink breast cancer awareness ribbon that said “Save the TaTas”.

Nimis's avatar

While waiting in line for the polls, I saw one that read:
Jesus called. He wants his religion back.

That’s kind of an old one. But the part that made me
giggle was that there was a picture of a cell phone.
I like the idea of Jesus Christ talking on a cell phone.

babygalll's avatar

One country…under surveillance.
You are driving a car not a phone booth.

augustlan's avatar

On 11/5/08, I think in hindsight one of the best is: OBAMA ‘08!

Megan64's avatar

As a note, for the previous two elections I put Democratic bumper stickers on my car, and both times the candidates did not prevail. This year however, I put the Obama sticker on my front door. Hmmmm. Are bumper stickers magic?

KatawaGrey's avatar

Maybe you just have unspeakable powers.

Foolaholic's avatar

Honk if you have poor impulse control.

Tantigirl's avatar

A good day is when the shit hits the fan and I have time to duck.

Resonantscythe's avatar

“my other ride is your mom”

“my dog is smarter than your honor student”

EmpressPixie's avatar

I’m going to be very unpopular and I don’t care.

I do NOT like the bumper stickers that make fun of honor students and the parents who are proud of their students’ accomplishments. You don’t know them. You don’t know anything about them. That bumper sticker might be from the one time they made honor roll that made their parents so proud. And even if they always make honor roll, shouldn’t we, as a society, stand behind them? They are our best and brightest! How has it become appropriate to mock pride in accomplishments gained through intelligence??

Resonantscythe's avatar

I have to argue with empress pixie. High grades do not necessarily translate into intelligence. This simply means that the person is good at absorbing and retaining information. intelligence is shown through proper use of that information. I’ve known students in Ap and honor classes that were simply information databases and yet lacked common sense and advanced thinking skills.

dalepetrie's avatar

If I had a beater car and wanted to cover it with bumper stickers, this is what it would say:

Honk if your horn is broken.

I have found HIM. Jesus is in my trunk.

Horn broken, look for finger.

My kid is an honor student…and my President is an idiot.

My other car is a piece of shit, too.

I tried seeing your point of view, but I couldn’t get my head that far up my ass.

Buckle up…it makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car.

God was my co-pilot, but we crashed in the mountains and I had to eat Him.

I’ll procrastinate tomorrow.

EmpressPixie's avatar

@Resonant: There are many kinds of intelligence shown many ways. The stereotype of the forgetful professor, for instance, persists because there are many incredibly intelligent people who don’t have a lick of common sense. And yes, they often stick with academia.

High grades, however, show that a person knows what a teacher is looking for and is able to apply that information. It’s a kind of intelligence. A good teacher designs tests to force students to apply the information they’ve learned to answer. Simply retaining and regurgitating memorized information is often not enough—especially in higher level classes.

Also, AP students and students in honor classes have elected to take more difficult classes than the majority of the student population. It doesn’t mean that they are doing well in those classes. Perhaps you meant you’ve known students who excelled in their chosen classes despite lacking the types of intelligence you value? Still, we should congratulate them for choosing to engage in more difficult material. Not mock them.

Resonantscythe's avatar

Ah. Now that’s clearer. You bring up excellent points. Honestly though, through my experiences I can’t believe in the educational system as much as yourself, I’ve seen way too many poor students and lackluster teachers slip through the cracks. As for the Ap classes themselves, I participated in a few for a short time(I saw them as unnecessary) and it was just more info within the same time span. I know their are different was to show intelligence, but honestly I’ve always seen doing well in school as easy as long as a person applys his or her self. I’ve seen failing students do noticeably better simply because they tried harder. Not to say the person was dumb, just that i see the grades= smarts idea as a misconception because it’s more effort based.

dalepetrie's avatar

I would like to simply interject a couple of points re the honor student kid, more observations really than anything:

1) What we “should” do and what people actually do are two different things. If someone wants to mock things that are perfectly valid, well, we do live in a Democracy that believes in free speech, I say I have no problem with them. I see a “My kid beat up your honor student” bumper sticker and it speaks volumes to me about this person’s mentality. He’s probably not only the parent of the class bully, but proud of it. I liken it to the many horribly ignorant things I see in the political realm when people happily ignore logic and reason in favor of ideology and aren’t at all shy about sharing it. I see something like this it just lets me know there’s an idiot in that car and I’ll keep my distance.

2) I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a bumper sticker that makes fun of the honor student him/herself, usually this kind of thing is really making fun of the hubris of the parent. Kind of like the backlash seen against the baby on board signs that were so prevalent a couple decades ago. People who hated and mocked those things didn’t hate babies, they just thought it was a big smug to post some sign like you’re special because you (along with billions of others) managed to reproduce, and now, what we have to get out of your way? It’s that same kind of thing with the honor student bumper stickers….tens of millions of kids make the honor roll every semester in this country, waddaya want, a freakin’ medal? I think there are some things you can be proud of that maybe you don’t need to advertise to the whole world…not saying you shouldn’t be proud, but taking exuberant pride in the commonplace is something that people should have as much right to mock as you have the right to advertise.

EmpressPixie's avatar

pssst… the point of the “baby on board” signs was originally to tell paramedics or other rescue workers that there was an infant that needed to be found in case of emergency.

edited to add: I kind of found them ridiculous until my mom informed me of this. Now I have to grudgingly respect them.

Resonantscythe's avatar

I usually don’t like reverting to junior high but, ooooh burn. I do see where dala was trying to go with that, though.

Foolaholic's avatar

The Onion News Network: My vote cancels out y’alls

dalepetrie's avatar

Totally accepted that people have by and large very valid reasons for the ornamentation they put on or in their cars. But no matter how valid the reason, if it creates an appearance of hubris, it opens them up to mocking.

Nimis's avatar

Saw one the other week that read:

Support your local hooker.
PLAY RUGBY.

babygalll's avatar

Save a horse..ride a cowboy!

El_Cadejo's avatar

i saw this last night.

cyndyh's avatar

Tonight I saw a bumper sticker that said

“That One 2008”.

jholler's avatar

I forgot my favorite two:

I love animals…they’re delicious
and
The best Homeland Security is an armed Citizen

row4food's avatar

On the way to work this morning:

“Honk if Farts Feel Good”

Funky_Rainbow's avatar

I love the “COEXIST” bumper sticker that is spelled with different symbols of religion and peace.

augustlan's avatar

@Funky: Me, too. That is one of my favorites!

Bri_L's avatar

Ditto that funky and augustlan!!!!

SoapChef's avatar

Ditto that funky, augustian and Bri!

toomuchcoffee911's avatar

Carpe Nocture: we’ve gotten more stuff done at 2pm

Republicans for Voldemort

Noel_S_Leitmotiv's avatar

All time favorite: ‘Sorry about driving so close in front of you’.

Second favorite: ‘Visualize no liberals’.

‘What would Morrissey do?’

‘If you must ride my ass at least pull my hair’.

‘If you must ride my ass at least buy me dinner first’.

‘First Hillary, then Gennifer, now Us’.

‘If you cant trust me with a gun, how can you trust me with a choice?’

‘Think healthcare is expensive now, just wait till its free’.

‘I bet Jesus would use his turn signal’.

‘Dont just sit there, nag your husband’.

I want a couple stickers that say the following:

‘Tailgating and sounding horn will have opposite of intended effect’

‘If im not outraged its because im busy WORKING’.

Bri_L's avatar

@Noel_S_Leitmotiv – wow those are some great ones!

Noel_S_Leitmotiv's avatar

@Bri_L : Lurve and shucks!

Trustinglife's avatar

I saw a bumper sticker today that made me laugh, although it doesn’t represent my own feelings:

“So many Christians
So few lions.”

pouncey's avatar

My child is an honor student. Those parents sound like the parent is getting pride from there kids work and be all egoistic about it.

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