General Question

jca's avatar

If someone of the opposite sex told you "you're looking good," is it flirting or is it just a compliment?

Asked by jca (36062points) December 4th, 2008

i told a guy before “you’re looking good” and he got all smiley and then i was hoping he didn’t take it as flirting. i really meant he looks healthy. i was complimenting him but hope he doesn’t think it’s flirting, because it wasn’t (believe me, when i flirt with people there’s no doubt).

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16 Answers

jca's avatar

i should have added that he’s not a stranger, he’s a friend, and i told him this after we ended our conversation and i was walking away, saying goodbye.

damien's avatar

Personally, I’d take it as a compliment. Maybe he was just pleased that you thought he’s looking good.

jtvoar16's avatar

It’s hard to tell when dealing with men. If they guy is like a typical dude, he probably thought it was flirting, unless you guys have never flirted in the past (joking or not, guys always think it is real, or at least, want to believe it is real.)
I really can’t answer your question, as I am gay, and if someone of the opposite sex complimented me, I would only take it as that (especially if they are a friend, cause all mine know about me.)
However, trying to imagine it the other way, I would only think you where flirting, if you had shown interest in the past.

jca's avatar

i never flirted with him, don’t particularly find him attractive.

i am curious if it came across as flirting in this particular instance, and i am also interested in general, if it’s flirting or a compliment because i want to know for the future, if i should not say that to someone. so i want to know 1. in this case and 2. in general.

jtvoar16's avatar

Usually, it is all about how you say it and when (this is my experience, by the way.) I mean if you say it with a wink and a seductive voice, then ya, he is going to think you are flirting, but if you just say it frank and “boring,” probably not, (unless he has feelings for you. If someone has feelings for you, then they will take anything you say as a flirt.)

Again, just my experiences. Everyone is different.

charliecompany34's avatar

it just means exactly that. just last saturday i was at a family outing and a non-family member said, “you look really good.” i said thanks. and that was it. you can discern if somebody is paying a compliment or making a pass if “you” understand why you look healthy.

EnzoX24's avatar

Whether he took it as flirting or not, it definitely instilled hope into him. Whenever someone said that to me, I didn’t always take it as flirting, but it gave me confidence, I would say, that I could be with someone like that.

Knotmyday's avatar

Definitely a “jump your bones” comment. You’re screwed now! :^)

overgrownbat's avatar

Compliment. Total compliment. The only reason he would take it a different way is if he does actually like you more than a friend.

IBERnineD's avatar

I would take it as a compliment, depending on your inflection. For instance if you say “looking good” in a higher voice with a half smile then look me up and down then that is flirting. On the other hand if you said with a slap on my shoulder and a wide smile then it would just be a friendly compliment!

tigran's avatar

have you been working out?

augustlan's avatar

I’m with jtvoar, it’s more about how you say it than what you say. If there was no ‘flirty’ tone of voice or action on your part I don’t think you need to worry about it. I would just take it as a compliment (which would still make me all smiley).

jlm11f's avatar

auggie, you are always looking good =)

augustlan's avatar

: )
Pnl…are you hitting on me? ~

Trustinglife's avatar

It’s all in the nature of your relationship up to that point. And your inflection, as said above.

90s_kid's avatar

If he goes “oooo u lookin’ gooooooooooooooooooooood” like the whole “wuz cookin good lookin?” thing than it’s flirting.

“oh you look good [N.]!”
Probably not flirting but a compliment.

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